Matrsux
May 13, 2003 7:52 PM   Subscribe

The Matrix 2 leaves Harry Knowles... "underwhelmed."
posted by adrober (63 comments total)
 
This is the guy who nearly exploded with ecstasy over Star Wars Episode 2, isn't it?

I'll take my chances and see Matrix:Reloaded for myself.
posted by Tubes at 7:54 PM on May 13, 2003


warning major spoilers in the review.
posted by KirkJobSluder at 8:07 PM on May 13, 2003


Wait, wait, I want to see how it feels:


MatrixFilter.



Hmmm. Kind of...underwhelming.
posted by muckster at 8:08 PM on May 13, 2003


Here's another review that happens to disagree with Harry. This guy makes me laugh, though, because he sounds a little bit like Jackie Harvey and he estimates that you might understand as little as 20% of the sophisticated intellectual badinage in the movie.
posted by Hildago at 8:17 PM on May 13, 2003


I don't see what anyone expects from this movie. Keanu Reeves is in it. And I didn't really think the first one lent itself to a sequel. Evil was defeated and all my questions were answered. How are the matrix robots expected to be evil-er or more threatening than last time? Sigh, don't get me started on T3... Oh, but what if the Matrix fought the Terminator!?

Meanwhile, in the real world: I can't my printer to work...
posted by BartFargo at 8:33 PM on May 13, 2003


I dunno. This articulate review seems to say otherwise.
posted by DyRE at 8:58 PM on May 13, 2003


Adam Gopnik does the somewhat standard "here's why the original was so brilliant and why therefore the sequel sucks" review, with somewhat standard spoilers. It's an OK piece, I guess (with a great illustration), but I'm a little annoyed that for all the time he goes on about Philip K. Dick, he seems to be unaware of UBIK, which I find to be the closest parallel.
posted by soyjoy at 9:14 PM on May 13, 2003


Here's Dr. Albert Oxford's in-depth review of the Matrix Reloaded. (Some spoilers.) There are some thought provoking points.

But I'll wait to see what the Childcare Action Project has to say about it before I see it.
posted by BartFargo at 9:28 PM on May 13, 2003


From our friends at Penny Arcade.

posted by GriffX at 9:33 PM on May 13, 2003


Is it me, or does anyone else get the feeling that the Jews are behind this movie? That they also got the opinion of the damned Christians, before asking the freaking Republicans what they thought? And if that weren't bad enough the whole thing reeks of the work of the lousy blacks, who also had the Asians help a bit and to add insult to injury they let the stupid right-wingers and the fundamentalist in on the game as well?

I swear-- to hell. In a hand basket.
posted by xmutex at 9:46 PM on May 13, 2003


the onion is also underwhelmed, or more precisely, that on the level of pure spectacle it succeeds, but fails at compelling narrative :D oh well, kinda like drunken master and drunken master 2 i guess!
posted by kliuless at 9:50 PM on May 13, 2003


No film could possibly live up to the expectations that computer/movie geeks have built up for "Reloaded." I'll be happy just to get some nice eyeball kicks.
posted by kindall at 9:52 PM on May 13, 2003


Hey Harry, heres to ya, buddy!

I hope and pray people start using that link as often as XFilter is used.
posted by bargle at 10:10 PM on May 13, 2003


oh no. what a terrible tradgedy. a movie sucks.
posted by Satapher at 10:12 PM on May 13, 2003


newsflash: eccentric movie critic dislikes popular movie. film at 11.
posted by blue_beetle at 10:13 PM on May 13, 2003


In other news, rabid fans turn on critic who gives negative review..
posted by Space Coyote at 10:25 PM on May 13, 2003


That's what I'm afraid of - that rabid fans do turn him on.
posted by soyjoy at 10:30 PM on May 13, 2003


This is the guy who nearly exploded with ecstasy over Star Wars Episode 2, isn't it?

I'll take my chances and see Matrix:Reloaded for myself.


I liked Episode II pretty well. Doesn't compare to Empire Strikes Back, but I didn't expect the new flicks to compare, I had seen too much of Lucas' new attitude with the Special Editions. As for Matrix II, I will probably see it later sometime. I read enough spoiler material that I need to let my short memory degrade to nothingness so I can see it and not know what is going on. I guess that is one good thing about a bad memory. I don't expect much beyond eye candy, but I did not think the first one went beyond that either. Neat idea, lots of eye candy.
posted by bargle at 10:33 PM on May 13, 2003


I guess there was no The Invisibles: Reloaded to steal from?

You liked the Matrix? Pay the real creator by buying one of his books.
posted by Dreamghost at 10:40 PM on May 13, 2003


the onion is also underwhelmed

They give some compelling reasons to see it, though.
posted by homunculus at 10:40 PM on May 13, 2003


"...limb from limb. Let's turn to snarky assholism. Harry?"

"Thanks, Mary. Have we ever got a bunch of snarky assholes this evening."

"Harry, are they complaining about things that they claim not to care about?"

"That's right, Mary, they are. It almost reminds me of the pro-Trek demonstrators we saw on the opening night of "Star Wars: The Phantom Menace" a number of years ago. Wait, here we have a young man - Sir? Sir?"

"Harry, we missed some of that young man's remarks, here in the studio."

"I'm... I'm sorry about that, but my producer is telling me that we had to bleep a lot of his remarks, - "

"Was he brandishing a Philip K. Dick novel, Harry?"

"He was indeed, Mary. Awwp! He's coming back! Ron! Ron! Kill tape!"
posted by GriffX at 10:43 PM on May 13, 2003


I guess there was no The Invisibles: Reloaded to steal from?

Funny. I've read the Invisibles and none of that ever occurred to me. After reading that post you linked, I still don't see anything but a tenuous connection. Not that I'm saying Grant Morrison is Paranoid. There's no way anyone would believe that. Not to mention the fact that Morrison took pretty much every possible conspiracy/ufo/illuminati myth, tossed them in a blender and voila: comic book. I'm not saying it wasn't brilliant. It was. It was also, much like The Matrix, very deeply rooted in already existent material.

Besides, I thought The Inivisibles was more similar to Dan Simmon's Carrion Comfort.
posted by eyeballkid at 2:05 AM on May 14, 2003


Thank you Dreamghost for introducing me to The Invisibles. Wonderul. That should keep me busy for a while!
posted by catchmurray at 2:30 AM on May 14, 2003


he probably didn't like the perks, the free travel, etc.
he sure liked "I cried at the end" Armageddon (the studio flew him to see the set), "The Faculty" (he had a cameo), The Mummy (they flew him to London)
Oh yeah, he loved Godzilla, too
He published a totally made-up list of Oscar nominees claiming to have insider info
I also read that he's had problems for selling screener copies of not-yet-released movies

also of interest, the Ben Stein interview:

BEN STEIN Okay, now you started by send... started yourself by sending in some fake emails from yourself that you said were some from other people, correct? I mean I have that in an interview with you.
HARRY KNOWLES Actually, actually it wasn't, I never sent myself fake emails because I am myself.
BEN STEIN You sent the site e-mail.
HARRY KNOWLES What I would do is that I would spend all weekend and - ya know - all night doing research on a story. Like say I'd get a tip that - ahh - the James Bond film is filming in Bangkok - umm - I would - ahh - begin scouring the Bangkok newspapers looking for information - umm - I would create spies that were allegedly sending stuff up.
BEN STEIN Now do you think that the New York Times does that?
HARRY KNOWLES No.
BEN STEIN ...or the New Yorker?
HARRY KNOWLES No.
BEN STEIN ...or The Wall Street Journal?
HARRY KNOWLES As a matter of fact...
BEN STEIN Then why are you allowed to do it? Why are you allowed to make up reviews that other critic's aren't?

posted by matteo at 2:33 AM on May 14, 2003


re: the Ben Stein question, the NYTimes kind of does it, too (Jayson BLair replacing AO Scott as film critic?)
posted by matteo at 2:35 AM on May 14, 2003


Evil was defeated and all my questions were answered. How are the matrix robots expected to be evil-er or more threatening than last time?

Maybe you're not very good with making up questions Bartfargo?
At the end of the first film Neo had become able to shape the matrix to his own ends but in the real world aspect the human race was still living in pods and being used for central heating while the few free humans lived under constant threat of destruction by the robots who ran the matrix.
Seems like a lot of room for a sequel to me.
posted by biffa at 3:00 AM on May 14, 2003


The first film was really bad. Really. Really. Bad. It was pretty enough, sure, but any pretence of intellectualism or even just an intelligent story is marketing hype. What it did was take a very old, traditional science fiction theme, and inject kung fu and big aliens. I considered walking out halfway through, and I love movies, even the dumb ones; I never do that.

People sat back and went "ooooh" at the pretty colours and the film made a stupid amount of money. So Reloaded, of course, will be more of the same; why would they mess with a winning formula?

Of all the movie trilogies doing the rounds at the moment, I think Harry Potter's my favourite. Sure, it's a kid's film, but at least it's unpretentious about its intentions.
posted by bwerdmuller at 3:39 AM on May 14, 2003


<Off Topic>
Can we agree to keep this thread going as the film launches and more and more of us see it? That way, we can critique the critiques and keep all of the links to information about the film in the same place.

I do not want to see a post on the front page that reads. "I saw The Matrix:Reloaded at the Midnight showing [editors note: this guy truly is a fan, staying up past his bedtime on the night *before* the film is released. wow.]. It was really cool." Note the link to the Matrix homepage.

I would like to call in the preemptive double post on that shit right now.
</Off Topic>

I thought this review, if true to the film, certainly deflates some of the mistique. I was under the impresssion that the brothers were smart filmmakers, but a film that does not build on what happened in the first film, does not take to heart the lesssons learned, is just-another-sequel like all of the other trying so hard to get back to the original film sequels. Shame, really.
posted by zpousman at 5:03 AM on May 14, 2003


Oh my, look at all the pretty typos!
posted by zpousman at 5:07 AM on May 14, 2003


From the review -
" Btw… watch the TV monitors, when the Architect is talking about the foulest most evil people of man’s past, they flash from Hitler to George Bush – I’M NOT SHITTING."

Sounds like it's not all bad then. :)
posted by Blue Stone at 5:15 AM on May 14, 2003


I certainly hope that people are not going to see a summer blockbuster action movie sequel for intellectual stimulation. Criticizing a electro-futuristic-kung-fu movie for lack of plot development is a great exercise in missing-the-point. Go see the movie "Dark City" if you want a movie with similar themes but with a good plot and decent acting (Kiefer!).

For god's sake man, just enjoy Trinity's shiny ass flowing gracefully by in slow motion and the gratuitous violence that ensues. It's the American way.
posted by thewittyname at 5:53 AM on May 14, 2003


Not for nuthin, but isn't it considered bad form to display someone else's image on a page without their knowledge/consent? That issue of using someone else's bandwidth without permission?
posted by adampsyche at 6:07 AM on May 14, 2003


just enjoy Trinity's shiny ass flowing gracefully by in slow motion and the gratuitous violence that ensues.

Tchah. For me, films like Blade (and, for that matter, Battle Royale) do it better.
posted by bwerdmuller at 6:44 AM on May 14, 2003


Harry may well be a wanker, but I thought he made some interesting points. The only thing I liked about the first film was the Geoff Darrow influence, I've loved his work ever since he collaborated with Frank Miller on the Hard Boiled and Big Guy comi^H^H^H^Hgraphic novels. Keanu sucks ass and always will, the philosophical concepts introduced would only be novel to someone who's never read any science fiction, and the totally derivative lock and load sequences were offensively gratuitous. It was nothing more than violence porn with a really glossy sheen applied. YMMV, naturally.
posted by MrBaliHai at 6:44 AM on May 14, 2003


In looking up YMMV I came across the Acronym Server ... Re. Keanu Reeves, I liked him in "River's Edge." But that was an early film for him.
posted by carter at 7:21 AM on May 14, 2003


I guess there was no The Invisibles: Reloaded to steal from?

I've always thought that if anybody should be suing the Wachowski Brothers, it's William Gibson--not just because of the whole "matrix" business, but because of the whole idea that, for some unexplained reason, the future will be populated by large factions of pseudo-militant African-Americans (though I think the ship they own in the Neuromancer trilogy is the Marcus Garvey, not the Nebuchadnezzar).
posted by Prospero at 7:23 AM on May 14, 2003


Whether or not you love the Matrix boils down to a simple factor: when Keanu opens his eyes and says, "I know kung-fu," you are either with him or against him. For those of us who grew up dreaming about such things, the Matrix was a revelation, a divine manifestation of geeky adolescent wish fulfillment in Dolby Surround with a hot chick doing kung fu in leather pants.

For my part, I'm willing to overlook the half-baked philosophy and the careworn premise because those things are McGuffins. The point of The Matrix isn't those things, but the balletic visions of ultraviolence and the overwhelming special effects. Like The Nutcracker, you're not really watching it for the plot--you're watching it to see how it moves, how it visually and sonically engages you on a visceral level. Saying the Matrix is bad because its story is unoriginal is like calling Shakespeare a plagiarist because he stole the plot of Romeo and Juliet. Star Wars wasn't exactly created ex nihilo either. It's just a movie. And the sequel has several hot chicks doing kung fu in what appear to be even tighter leather pants. I'm just sayin'.
posted by vraxoin at 7:23 AM on May 14, 2003


Excellent analogy vraxoin.

tagline idea
Metafilter: We don't read it for the plot.
posted by titboy at 8:30 AM on May 14, 2003


thewittyname: Kiefer??? In Dark City??? Gads. That bad Peter Lorre impersonation had me in stitches.
posted by Perigee at 8:43 AM on May 14, 2003


Star Wars had Kung-Fu Chicks in Metal Bikinis. Research indicates that this level of awesomeness will never again be reached.
posted by thewittyname at 8:43 AM on May 14, 2003


Whether or not you love the Matrix boils down to a simple factor: when Keanu opens his eyes and says, "I know kung-fu," you are either with him or against him. For those of us who grew up dreaming about such things, the Matrix was a revelation, a divine manifestation of geeky adolescent wish fulfillment in Dolby Surround with a hot chick doing kung fu in leather pants.

Vraxoin, I think you nailed it. I was definitely against him, thinking through the whole morpheus/neo kung fu scene, "Damn posers." When I saw the film, I was at the level of prowess displayed and by no means did I have any business saying "I know kung fu!". One of my student peers was 15 and he could have taken out both Neo and Morpheus single handedly (and I'm not being hyperbolic).
posted by ursus_comiter at 9:09 AM on May 14, 2003


Well, nothing ruins fight scenes like knowing the fighting style involved. No wonder you didn't get into it.

You sort of have to tell yourself that there's no reasonable way these actors can actually master whatever type of combat it is they're doing for the one movie and just hope for a decent degree of verisimilitude.
posted by furiousthought at 9:44 AM on May 14, 2003


You sort of have to tell yourself that there's no reasonable way these actors can actually master whatever type of combat it is they're doing for the one movie and just hope for a decent degree of verisimilitude.

Ah, but my expectations are colored by seeing real martial artists in films - folks who have trained all their lives and who have every ounce of Keanau's acting chops, if not more.
posted by ursus_comiter at 10:05 AM on May 14, 2003


Wasn't that whole dojo sequence basically sped-up slow-mo footage, where Reeves and Fishburne learned their moves balletically and the result was enhanced with camera speed? It felt that way. Most real fights I've seen don't go on all that long.

I saw some stuff in Navy SEALs that was so obvious to one who's merely read a little about special-warfare operators that I was watching going "Yup, they'd blow their cover there; nope, he'd never do that; ain't no way he'd say this," etc.

If you approach it in the right spirit -- with a few friends, as a drinking game, say -- these sorts of goofs can actually be quite entertaining. Like the chopper base in the last scene of John Wayne's The Green Berets, where the sun's setting on the South China Sea, as seen from landward...in the east, in other words.
posted by alumshubby at 10:44 AM on May 14, 2003


If you approach it in the right spirit -- with a few friends, as a drinking game, say -- these sorts of goofs can actually be quite entertaining. Like the chopper base in the last scene of John Wayne's The Green Berets, where the sun's setting on the South China Sea, as seen from landward...in the east, in other words.

Now I know how the movie ends... Thanks alot.
posted by drezdn at 11:00 AM on May 14, 2003


maybe Hollywood should do what Run Run Shaw did.

Take martial artists and have THEM trained as actors, instead of vice-versa...
posted by titboy at 11:37 AM on May 14, 2003


I think the Star Wars Kid should have been in it...
posted by Perigee at 12:39 PM on May 14, 2003


Titboy, YES!
posted by ursus_comiter at 12:57 PM on May 14, 2003


ursus_comiter: Titboy, YES!

This really made me laugh for some reason.
posted by fishbulb at 3:28 PM on May 14, 2003


drezdn...don't worry; there are enough other unintentionally screwy things in that movie to keep you drinkin'. Saving Private Ryan is even better in that regard.
posted by alumshubby at 3:42 PM on May 14, 2003


The training fight in the Dojo doesn't have to outshine what real flesh-and-blood Kung Fu Masters are capable of. It only has to match what the rules of the Matrix let you do - and what you can do when you bend them. There's no inherent reason why the Matrix has to model high level martial arts in such realistic detail. It's just a big screensaver...

I'm seeing RELOADED tonight. Knowles is a tubgeek drama queen, not a serious reviewer. (Moriarty is too good for him.)
posted by anser at 4:26 PM on May 14, 2003


There's no inherent reason why the Matrix has to model high level martial arts in such realistic detail.

Other than to succeed in entertaining. It failed to do that for me.
posted by ursus_comiter at 5:22 PM on May 14, 2003




Roger Ebert saves the day!
posted by adrober at 6:56 PM on May 14, 2003


Where does David Edelstein (in homunculus' Slate link) get Lucasoid?? It's an ugly word, and I take exception to the suggestion that George Lucas is making brainless blockbusters. The Star Wars films are independent productions every bit as knowing and artful as last year's Far From Heaven, which every critic went apeshit over. If anything, Lucasoid ought to refer to resourceful auteurs who stridently follow their artistic vision -- even while the critics boo.

Either that, or I watched Attack of the Clones one time too many, and something inside my head broke.
posted by muckster at 7:08 PM on May 14, 2003


The Salon reviewer likes it.
posted by homunculus at 8:26 PM on May 14, 2003


MetaCritic has more reviews and gives it 66 out of 100.
posted by muckster at 8:39 PM on May 14, 2003


Just got back from the 10:00 showing here. There were some pacing problems here and there, and some characters that it would have been nice to see a bit more development on, but overall, it was pretty down with the kicking of ass. Very Empire Strikes Back feel to it, if you know what I mean.*

The only thing that really stuck out for me were the obvious gaps that were left out - intentionally, I assume - to make room for the Enter The Matrix game and such to fill in. Either that, or they just had to work around the whole actresses dying on them thing.

* (No, I do not mean that Agent Smith is Neo's father.)
posted by majcher at 12:39 AM on May 15, 2003


dude, while I admire the way you aren't giving out the spoiler on Smith being Neo's dad, don't you think it would be a bit smarter to try a more elliptical method of deciet than straight-out rejection?
posted by kaibutsu at 8:17 AM on May 15, 2003


Everytime I see the Matrix:Reloaded trailer I think the same thing:

Hooray! Another Cadillac CTS ad! Where's the Led Zeppelin music?

It doesn't matter one blowjob. This movie is just as critic proof as The Phantom Menace and the fanboys will happily plunk down their ten bucks regardless of the reviews.
posted by mark13 at 12:52 PM on May 15, 2003


I apologize for the following digression.

Dreamghost: The Invisibles rocks. I'm a huge fan. However, when Grant Morrison and his awe-inspiring ego take credit for what amounts to zeitgeist, it makes him look pathetic. (I believe his published claim was something to the effect that he was the first to combine sex, bald guys, philosophy and kung fu.) William Gibson is at least as much of an influence, as is Ghost in the Shell and a hat full of philosophers and cultural critics. Not to mention the Bible. Also, this is from a guy who's determined to make comics creators (or at least himself) the "rock stars" of the media world.

Gibson's own reactions might be a useful lesson. Most creators who really are that good don't need to flounce around in wrap-around shades complaining that someone stole their cyberpunk.

As for Reloaded, my own opinion falls somewhere between Slate's and Salon's, which does amount to a let-down.
posted by blissbat at 6:07 PM on May 15, 2003


I've decided the only way this movie works is if you approach it as a parody of the first one. It's that laugh-out-loud bad. I was FURIOUS at the Wachowskis as I left the theatre last night.

Best review I've read so far, now that I'm allowing myself to read them, is Stephen Hunter's.
posted by CunningLinguist at 7:30 AM on May 16, 2003


Finally got around to seeing it.

I'm looking very forward to the final installment of Lord of the Rings.
posted by five fresh fish at 5:19 PM on May 19, 2003


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