Tennis player's parent drugs his opponents
August 6, 2003 10:02 AM Subscribe
Sometimes a parent can go a little too far helping out a kid. In this case - way too far, when it comes to drugging the competition.
Someone's been reading Infinite Jest...
posted by PinkStainlessTail at 10:05 AM on August 6, 2003
posted by PinkStainlessTail at 10:05 AM on August 6, 2003
Abandon all ye bob hope indeed. Wouldn't a sabotaging parent want to give his kids' competition PRO-anxiety medicine, tho?
posted by DenOfSizer at 10:13 AM on August 6, 2003
posted by DenOfSizer at 10:13 AM on August 6, 2003
Wait, it says tournaments, yet the age range sounds like a friendly match(???) His son is 15, the teacher killed, 25. What is he doing, betting money with opponents too?
posted by thomcatspike at 10:14 AM on August 6, 2003
posted by thomcatspike at 10:14 AM on August 6, 2003
Anna Kournikova slaps forehead.
posted by Space Coyote at 10:18 AM on August 6, 2003
posted by Space Coyote at 10:18 AM on August 6, 2003
"A tennis parent has been accused of drugging the foes of his offspring"
Is he a dog?
posted by LouieLoco at 10:31 AM on August 6, 2003
Is he a dog?
posted by LouieLoco at 10:31 AM on August 6, 2003
Another event foretold by the Morris. Unfortunate that he has gone rubbish, though.
Blue Jam 'Techniques for selecting a child for the best school in the area':
'2nd Man: “Well, the competition to get our child into the best school in the area is so intense that, um, we have to use whatever methods we can.”
3rd Woman: “Mmmmm”
2nd Man: “To ensure our child’s success. And one way of doing that is to rubbish the opposition, and there are various techniques that we use to do this. (Voice over continues over telephone conversation) Ummm, we spread rumours about the other children in the local newspapers.”
3rd Woman: “Hello, I’m just a bit worried about a little boy that lives on Firth street. Andrew Pierce. Well, we’re a bit concerned because we saw him incinerating a live crow. It could have been a squirrel, it was a bit charred. I think I’ve seen him driving a car as well. He’s three, I think. I have got some pictures, actually. My husband has a lens.”
2nd Man (voice over): “Well, you know, we do things like get them drunk, which is quite easy.”
posted by asok at 10:46 AM on August 6, 2003
Blue Jam 'Techniques for selecting a child for the best school in the area':
'2nd Man: “Well, the competition to get our child into the best school in the area is so intense that, um, we have to use whatever methods we can.”
3rd Woman: “Mmmmm”
2nd Man: “To ensure our child’s success. And one way of doing that is to rubbish the opposition, and there are various techniques that we use to do this. (Voice over continues over telephone conversation) Ummm, we spread rumours about the other children in the local newspapers.”
3rd Woman: “Hello, I’m just a bit worried about a little boy that lives on Firth street. Andrew Pierce. Well, we’re a bit concerned because we saw him incinerating a live crow. It could have been a squirrel, it was a bit charred. I think I’ve seen him driving a car as well. He’s three, I think. I have got some pictures, actually. My husband has a lens.”
2nd Man (voice over): “Well, you know, we do things like get them drunk, which is quite easy.”
posted by asok at 10:46 AM on August 6, 2003
Interesting tactic; a welcome change to immediate surrender.
posted by dhoyt at 11:10 AM on August 6, 2003
posted by dhoyt at 11:10 AM on August 6, 2003
at least this guy kept his kids away from the bees.
posted by specialk420 at 11:56 AM on August 6, 2003
posted by specialk420 at 11:56 AM on August 6, 2003
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posted by stupidsexyFlanders at 10:04 AM on August 6, 2003