There goes my entire posting wad.

September 2, 2003 11:32 PM

Let's say you're MacGyver and you were stuck in a room with 3 Bar Stools and the only way out is through a ceiling window.What would you do? Well... that's certainly an option I suppose. There's plenty of other useful tips for the cunning do-it-yourselfer at Homemade Sex Toys. I assume it would be a smart idea to have some Boy Butter on hand before you try the one with the PVC Pipe. It's all possibly easier than the real thing, which seems unecessarily loud and complicated. All Links NSFW
posted by Stan Chin (15 comments total)

Links via M&C, Geisha Asobi, Stan Chin Dot Com, Sensible Erection, Linkswarm, Attu Sees All, possibly Blort I don't remember, and a whole lot of other places.
posted by Stan Chin at 11:35 PM on September 2, 2003

You can find links at Stan Chin Dot Com? All I ever see there is "coming soon" etc.
posted by jonson at 11:45 PM on September 2, 2003

oh, no, no, not the bubble wrap! nooooooo!
posted by rswst8 at 12:04 AM on September 3, 2003

Melon Baller can also be a team sport.
posted by homunculus at 12:05 AM on September 3, 2003

Not to soil the show by association with this thread - but This American Life recently did a show about real world MacGyver's. It's good listening and very safe for work (unless you're caught goofing off!) Real Media Audio link.
posted by wfrgms at 1:42 AM on September 3, 2003

It's all good. Except when used 'for the wrong reasons', then the terrorists have won.

Is the guy in the illustrations at homemade sex toys one of our own?

A wordplay on a screen-name, not an assertion about the sexual passtimes of JollyWanker, just to clear that up in advance.
posted by asok at 5:33 AM on September 3, 2003

Interesting, but the whole "MacGyver" element sort of fades away when you realize that every one of them sort of follow the same assembly rules:

1. Find some stuff.
2. Make a hole.
3. Fuck it.

Eliminate Step 3 and you've basically mastered high school bong-making 101, too.
posted by XQUZYPHYR at 5:48 AM on September 3, 2003

Eliminate Step 3 and you've basically mastered high school bong-making 101, too

I used to have a friend who could make a bong out of anything...I mean, anything. Made a bong out of bunkbeds (tubular kind), made a bong out of a walking stick...and the all time kicker, made a bong out of my sister's Volvo. He was killed by a drunk driver, and at his funeral, the minister...who didn't know him at all...was blathering on and at one point, she rested her hand on the coffin and said "If X were here right now, I'm sure he'd say..." and she paused. During the pause, you could hear about a hundred people whisper "I can make a bong out of that!"
posted by dejah420 at 7:20 AM on September 3, 2003

Ah, the time-tested blanket pull. Discovered that one when I was about 8, and it still serves me well. Good times.
posted by widdershins at 8:15 AM on September 3, 2003

goes it a bit downhill after the melon baller. A much better solution is just to get a Real Doll
posted by carfilhiot at 9:21 AM on September 3, 2003

An edible, combination bong-fuckee hole with a dildo attached. Now that I'd buy.
posted by DenOfSizer at 10:10 AM on September 3, 2003

posted by Stan Chin at 11:01 AM on September 3, 2003

Huh. I thought Boy Butter was the consequence of lube, not the lube itself.
posted by stonerose at 11:18 AM on September 3, 2003

stonerose, I think you have it confused with santorum, which, as far as I know, is not available as a commercial product.
posted by homunculus at 12:31 PM on September 3, 2003

1. Find some stuff.
2. Make a hole.
3. Fuck it.

That describes most of my sexual history.
posted by jonmc at 1:44 PM on September 3, 2003