Truth in advertising.

September 14, 2003 4:16 AM

Welcome to VantiyDate.com, the world's most judgemental, shallow dating website.
posted by PenDevil (31 comments total)

Blatantly vain dating website or subtle twenty-first century eugenics? You decide.
posted by Dillonlikescookies at 4:26 AM on September 14, 2003

On the one hand, going on a date with a person who doesn't have a decent set of pictures so I know what I'm getting into isn't cool.

And on the other hand, I bet most people will go will just go with racist instincts and pass over those of alternate ethnicities anyway. This just gives them an easier way to do so. Besides, you don't HAVE to restrict it by race - there's a show all races option.

Heck, a lot of these factors I believe a lot of people take into account. I think education, race, religion, height, weight, income, type of car ("Hey, wanna take a ride in my Ferrari?" definitely is going to work more often than "Hey, wanna take a ride in my Honda Civic?") occupation, etc. are all things that people take into account in the real world when they date. You don't want to take a pornographer back home to mom, now, do you?

As much as I don't like to admit it, I believe that there's an inherent biological component to racism. I think if you're not exposed to people of another race until you're a certain age, you're always going to have to almost consciously try to correct for that tendency. My parents grew up in New Haven, CT, and basically were in a section of the city that was effectively a melting pot. I grew up in a town so white I managed to never see a black person in the flesh until I was in 4th grade. I've never really felt at ease in a mixed-race environment, yet my parents don't seem to mind at all. I know according to all current thought this tendency shouldn't exist, is learned, not innate, but my question is, if it's not innate to some degree, then why did it ever come to exist? Biologically speaking, we're trying to preserve our own genes here - I think, subconsciously, we try to pick mates who share enough genes so that our genetic advantages pass on the next generation, yet not so closely related that it's incestuous.

My little brother was calling kids of other races bad names on the playground when he was five years old. Hilariously enough, he didn't know the names of the other races he was insulting, so he made them up on the spot, so though it MIGHT have been learned, I seriously doubt it. That's really what got me thinking about this in such detail - my school keeps telling me it's not innate, that racism can be "whitewashed away," that it's caught like a disease from other people, that we can learn not to discriminate based upon race. I'm not so sure - a few kids in my town got in a fighter with a bunch of kids who happened to be black. They lost the fight. Now they have a "school uniform" which effectively translates them wearing T-shirts with confederate flags every single day. I'm not sure what to make of this.

Honestly, I think a lot of people make their dating decisions like Elane on "Seinfeld" does. At least they're guaranteed a match with a fellow vanity-whore.
posted by Veritron at 4:54 AM on September 14, 2003

I think [...] income, type of car ("Hey, wanna take a ride in my Ferrari?" definitely is going to work more often than "Hey, wanna take a ride in my Honda Civic?") occupation, etc. are all things that people take into account in the real world when they date.

If the type of car or amount of money a person has is a serious factor in your ability to date someone then you are, unfortunately, indeed shallow. Yeah the real world is full of shallow people, it's not something to be proud of, it sucks.
posted by carfilhiot at 7:11 AM on September 14, 2003

Yeah the real world is full of shallow people, it's not something to be proud of, it sucks.

Just because someone loves sex and drugs and cash and flash doesn't mean they don't love great literary conversations and charity work.
posted by RJ Reynolds at 7:49 AM on September 14, 2003

this is gross.
posted by Peter H at 8:57 AM on September 14, 2003

that said, woo!! hot chixxx! dumb and ready to have th' sexxxxxxxxxxxxx.

it would really suck to hook up with one of these girls, only to hear them name drop members of Korn and/or Limp Biscuit that they've been fucked by or want to be fucked by, if the opportunity came up. and asked what kind of car i drove, and what business my dad was in. and to go blank when i talked about anything that wasnt about them.

but i for one welcome our aesthetically perfect noxema overlords. but i bet if you cut them open it's all dumb rotting pickle meat in there.
posted by Peter H at 9:02 AM on September 14, 2003

Blatantly vain dating website or subtle twenty-first century eugenics?

No, no, no. This is a front for a company that's trying to breed abnormally attractive people for music videos and TV commercials. After these people on the site hook up, they are forced to breed children who are then taken to a facility in the forests of Oregon, where they are taught posture and the proper use of moisturizer. It's nefarious.

Actually, i think world would be a better place if the attractive were eliminated and we ugly folks returned to power, but the attractive support the makeup, botox, tanning, manicure, and ipecac industries, upon whivh our nation depends. It's all so sordid.
posted by jonmc at 9:05 AM on September 14, 2003

I think the cash barrier is the largest turnoff to me. I don't really want to meet women who all make more than $200,000 a year. The 7.0 rating thing is interesting, I like the idea just because people generally tend to date people of similar attractiveness (so lets make a site for the 4.0- 7.0 range as well, and a 1.0-4.0 site, paper bag over the head is optional) and this makes it convenient.

If the site authors are actually serious about making sure the people are intelligent, however, they should do a mandatory IQ test when you sign up. Because I'm willing to bet most those vapid models can't put up an IQ of 100 like they're supposed to :-)
posted by Happydaz at 9:06 AM on September 14, 2003

"Hey, wanna take a ride in my Ferrari?" definitely is going to work more often than "Hey, wanna take a ride in my Honda Civic?"

Actually, all other things being equal I'd turn down the babe in the Ferrari for the one in the Honda Civic. Color me shallow.
posted by ZachsMind at 9:38 AM on September 14, 2003

i wouldn't fuzzle them bizzatches with miguel's dizzle.
posted by quonsar at 9:44 AM on September 14, 2003

I think the cash barrier is the largest turnoff to me. I don't really want to meet women who all make more than $200,000 a year.

I think it was a 7.0 rating or be rich / famous.

Better that these folks get stuck with each other, no?
A lot of these not much hotter than yr average profile except that their photos are for the most part headshots, so with lighting, make-up, etc, they look better than most snapshots do, anyway.
posted by mdn at 10:12 AM on September 14, 2003

gold: "be of legal copulation age (18)"
posted by shoepal at 10:34 AM on September 14, 2003

I think you missed how completely effing hot this girl is.

Focus on the abs, not the issues.
posted by will at 10:37 AM on September 14, 2003

Yeah, will, that "localhost" chick is real hot!
posted by kindall at 11:18 AM on September 14, 2003

w00t!
dear God, I'm so sorry
posted by elwoodwiles at 12:37 PM on September 14, 2003

Let those who are sinless cast the first rock!

Shallow? This from someone who misspells both vanity (vantiy) and judgmental (judgemental)? heheh ;-P

Anyway, my reaction: After my heart bypass and a lifetime of Marine Corps fitness, I blew up to 265 pounds and I became sympathetic to the plight of the obese. I dated many overweight women (I had no choice, getting the pretty, svelte women to look at me was difficult at best), fucked a few, and established a wonderful relationship with one that lasted almost a year.

Now, after shedding 85 of those pounds and well on the way back to my former physique, I find that my taste in women is returning to those who care about their physical health and appearance as much as I do. Call it shallow if you want, I don't care, but I do think that such selectivity runs deeper than that. Then again, I'm an animalist.

( BTW, as for keeping the racial preference open to 'all', last week on LavaLife, I met and had a one night stand with my first black woman. Also, for her, this was her "first taste of white meat", in her words. WHOA!!! I will never forget you, COCO!!! )
posted by mischief at 1:36 PM on September 14, 2003

What's so special about Providence RI and New Castle DE that they are the only places outside of major metro areas listed under "location"- especially when you don't have any entries or matches or whatever from those areas? I'm all confused here. Is this satirical, maybe, or put together by people who live in or who have connections to Providence or New Castle? And why is the only foreign city mentioned Stockholm?
posted by raysmj at 2:09 PM on September 14, 2003

Better that these folks get stuck with each other, no?

Well put, though a bit cynical. The corollary of which is, of course, better that you slobs get stuck together as well.

This is not much different than the snobbery of musical taste, those of you who look down on others who enjoy popular music. Well, that shoe fits the other foot in regards to tastes in healthy lifestyles, career advancement and 'pride of plumage'. I ain't busting my ass on the treadmill, in the weightroom, eating salad, consulting with my image specialist and building a network "just to marry some fat, ugly [broad]" as my very pretty and very feminine best friend puts it.

Perhaps 2% of humans are stuck with their obesity and/or their gruesome looks. The rest of you have no excuse. ;-P
posted by mischief at 3:42 PM on September 14, 2003

Hey, I live in New Castle, DE! I have yet to see a preponderance of pretty people around here, though. That's kind of weird.
posted by eilatan at 3:52 PM on September 14, 2003

mischief, it was VanityDate who originally misspelled "judgmental". Just for the record. You'd think a guy running a website that wants to gather intelligent, beautiful people could manage to spellcheck.

And, not to be an ass, but an IQ of 100 as filter doesn't really pump my so-called 'nads. That's the number widely reported as the American average. If I wanted to meet average intelligence, I'd go down to the pub for $1 Pint Night.
posted by pineapple at 4:21 PM on September 14, 2003

Actually, 'judgemental' is still an accepted variant of 'judgmental'.
posted by dgaicun at 4:55 PM on September 14, 2003

Though they *do* misspell their own name as 'VantiyDate.com'. That's pretty pathetic. Yes, I'm probably being overly 'judgememtal'.
posted by dgaicun at 5:13 PM on September 14, 2003

i'll stick to craigslist, everyone's a vain pyscho just looking for a one night stand (except me, of course ) but at least it's free.
posted by NGnerd at 5:56 PM on September 14, 2003

Damnit, that's the first time Firebird has ever messed up.

Anyway, she's lost now to the sands of time. Farwell, foxy woman.
posted by will at 8:40 PM on September 14, 2003

actually, this site is a good way to determine who NOT to date.
posted by mcsweetie at 9:27 PM on September 14, 2003

mcsweet: "who NOT to date" is the complement of "who TO date", so which set is which is dependent upon your perspective. ;-P
posted by mischief at 10:58 PM on September 14, 2003

Actually, 'judgemental' is still an accepted variant of 'judgmental'.

Well, okay. Accepted variants of words, though, aren't usually favored by the folks with the IQs over 100 that VanityDate so desperately seeks.
posted by pineapple at 12:00 AM on September 15, 2003

>And why is the only foreign city mentioned Stockholm?

Maybe its dynamic according to whoever they've accepted?

Anyway, this site is so close to some novel solutions to the glut of online dating sites but it doesn't quite make it. Instead of just rating photos, how about rating dates? Say, after a couple has met they have to fill out a questionaire like:

1. Did the person look like their photos?

2. Were they like their profile suggest they were?

etc.

Then there could be a "hot list" of people who are at the very least honest and would make a good date.
posted by skallas at 2:53 AM on September 15, 2003

Skallas: I later tried male/male and female/female and found some Providence and New Castle people. There just weren't any straights from those places. So it seems you're right. If the site get big enough, however, the owners will have to change that.
posted by raysmj at 6:47 AM on September 15, 2003

Perhaps 2% of humans are stuck with their obesity and/or their gruesome looks. The rest of you have no excuse. ;-P

your reasoning skills are lacking if you can conclude that a person with a disinterest in dating people whose primary interest = good headshots and whose secondary interest = high income must be obese or gruesome.

We all want to feel attracted to our partners, and aesthetic appeal is certainly part of the formula, but by itself it's only good enough for reaching a kind of not-unpleasant boredom, and this is the kind of site where it doesn't seem likely too much else will be going on (even really hot people leave me indifferent if they're not interesting)

skallas, nice idea, although considering those dates didn't work out, it could be a little skewed...
posted by mdn at 7:44 AM on September 15, 2003

Bah. The most interesting post in the thread and it doesn't get any responses.

my school keeps telling me it's not innate, that racism can be "whitewashed away," that it's caught like a disease from other people, that we can learn not to discriminate based upon race

To my thinking racism is, like pretty much everything else, a complex soup of innate and environmental. Perhaps people are predisposed to fall into certain patterns of thought, but their surroundings still have great influence. I'm not really a typical case (I had to listen to my south african grandparents talk about "the negroes" as a kid) but I've managed to alter my perceptions a bit over the years.
posted by Tlogmer at 7:43 PM on September 15, 2003