Comments on: Decrypt and Enjoy

Decrypt and Enjoy

ed — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 19:26:37 -0800

Cinco: 2 4 4 6 5 4 5 3 3 4 3 4 8 4 7 3 7 6 2 2 2 11 3 3 1 3 3 4 4 6 4 6 5 7 4 3 1 3 3 4 7 5 5 4 4

By: quonsar

quonsar — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 19:33:44 -0800

<title="consider getting life">

By: riffola

riffola — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 19:35:42 -0800

Ed, what's that in English?

By: ed

ed — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 19:37:01 -0800

if a link goes dead, let me know and i'll replace it

By: The God Complex

The God Complex — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 19:39:13 -0800

Hmm. I'm disconcerted, vaguely.

By: Decypher

Decypher — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 19:39:17 -0800

Let me be the first to say.... I don't get it..

By: Item

Item — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 19:39:52 -0800

I'd like to see this post deleted if only for the reason that erasing the fruit of pointless labor could be very, very funny.

By: amberglow

amberglow — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 19:40:35 -0800

ed, the first link has exceeded its limit already (unless that's the point?)

By: ed

ed — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 19:42:18 -0800

amber: alt. link = 2

By: amberglow

amberglow — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 19:44:51 -0800

ahhh! ok! now we're rolling: my...

By: The God Complex

The God Complex — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 19:44:59 -0800

If Decypher doesn't get it, I think we're hooped.

By: monju_bosatsu

monju_bosatsu — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 19:49:01 -0800

By: amberglow

amberglow — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 19:49:21 -0800

look tho, i got the first word! (i'm all tired now--you guys take it from there)

By: quonsar

quonsar — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 19:49:58 -0800

ahhh! ok! now we're rolling: my... dog has fleas. you can tune a ukelele but you can't tuna fish.

By: ashbury

ashbury — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 19:50:47 -0800

WHAT THE FUCK ED? but I'm very impressed with how much time you put into this. congrats, but ... wtf?

By: stonerose

stonerose — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 19:51:18 -0800

If only to keep things on track (?) here in the blue: MeTa.

By: tiamat

tiamat — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 19:54:54 -0800

is there a secret message here, or are you just trying to annoy?

By: pemulis

pemulis — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 19:57:07 -0800

BE SURE TO DRINK YOUR OVALTINE

By: davidmsc

davidmsc — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 19:58:05 -0800

Please. PLEASE. Tell me. I just don't understand.

By: IshmaelGraves

IshmaelGraves — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 19:58:41 -0800

tiamat: yes and yes.

By: Stan Chin

Stan Chin — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 20:00:18 -0800

It's almost time for Encyclopedia Brown to walk into Ed's office and find him dead, and this post is his only clue! Can he solve this mystery in 15 pages? Read on and find out!

By: punishinglemur

punishinglemur — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 20:02:06 -0800

B D D F E D E C C D C D H D G C G F B B B K C C A C C D D F D F E G D C A C C D G E E D D What do I win?

By: The God Complex

The God Complex — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 20:03:29 -0800

Choose your own adventure, bitch. Do you: - Front like your loco, turn to page 37. or - Puff puff like your cocoa, turn to page 41.

By: Stan Chin

Stan Chin — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 20:06:36 -0800

Jesus, God Complex just broke me.

By: Slithy_Tove

Slithy_Tove — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 20:08:14 -0800

For god's sake, people, don't solve it or you'll summon the cenobites!

By: ed

ed — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 20:12:25 -0800

Okay, incentives are fair. I'll send a $50 gift certificate to the first person who solves it.

By: quonsar

quonsar — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 20:13:14 -0800

i was trying to hum that but couldn't remember if K is a full or half-tone higher than G.

By: Stan Chin

Stan Chin — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 20:14:08 -0800

Is it a $50 Gift Certificate to Puzzle Barn?

By: LittleMissCranky

LittleMissCranky — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 20:14:08 -0800

Damnit, pemulis, that's what I was going to say.

By: LouReedsSon

LouReedsSon — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 20:14:41 -0800

Gave up a third of the way through.... Is there a point?

By: interrobang

interrobang — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 20:15:49 -0800

Someone once told me how his friend of his had a roommate that was going crazy, staying up all night on the computer. One night, the friend came home and the roommate was breathing heavily, illuminated only by the computer screen. The roommate was all sweaty and agitated. "What's going on?" the friend asked. The roommate slowly looked up. "I've... invented... a... new form of mathematics!" The roommate heaved. The roommate looked at the computer screen, which was displaying line after meaningless line of scrolling numbers. This reminds me of that.

By: The God Complex

The God Complex — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 20:26:51 -0800

One night, the friend came home and the roommate was breathing heavily, illuminated only by the computer screen. The roommate was all sweaty and agitated. For a second, I thought I could relate. Stan, just be thankful I didn't continue on with nonsense about po-po's, mofos, and freaking on the downlow.

By: elpapacito

elpapacito — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 20:30:34 -0800

Guess I figured it out ..I'll try Each number is a word. Each number is the lenght of the word. For instance, the 5nd five from the left. If you keep your pointer on a number for a while you'll see "NFSW word" ..and the link goes to SPERM ..which is 5 letter long. Don't care to check the whole message , just because I have other things to do. Somebody wanna try to complete the message ? (assuming I correctly found the method..)

By: pemulis

pemulis — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 20:34:10 -0800

ed: I killed my parents. Now what?

By: PrinceValium

PrinceValium — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 20:34:19 -0800

It says "NSFW verb" papacito, and sperm isn't a verb. except in very low budget erotica.

By: IshmaelGraves

IshmaelGraves — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 20:34:40 -0800

elpapacito, I think that is the correct method. But it's not very helpful. I just went through the whole thing and guessed at several and am looking at the result and wondering whether it's me or ed who's insane. And I don't know if 'SPERM' is correct; the mouseover says 'NSFW verb,' not 'word.'

By: PrinceValium

PrinceValium — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 20:36:34 -0800

But yes, you may be right in that each number is the length of a word; the word is inferred from the link and the clue in the alt tag; the words spell out a quote from some high ranking philosopher. For example I think the first clue is "AM". That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

By: PrinceValium

PrinceValium — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 20:37:36 -0800

er, never mind, "am" isn't a pronoun. Back to square uno.

By: riffola

riffola — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 20:37:36 -0800

It's "Image", the NSFW is for the picture, it doesn't mean the verb is NSFW.

By: punishinglemur

punishinglemur — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 20:46:10 -0800

I don't know where you're working, but it's one hell of an uptight place when that picture is NSFW.

By: WolfDaddy

WolfDaddy — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 20:48:53 -0800

Is it safe? I have my dental tools here, waiting.

By: ed

ed — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 20:51:35 -0800

Further: the _________ had ________.

By: riffola

riffola — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 21:02:44 -0800

My 4 will 6 5 mail? image? 3 ule 4 3 4 8 disc 7 off 7 6 up in do? 11 mat and 1 you 3 4 4 Barbie? 4 6 5 7 4 3 1 3 3 4 7 5 5 4 4

By: iamck

iamck — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 21:02:58 -0800

ok, i tried, i really did. and now i just feel dissatisfied, and like a big loser.

By: ed

ed — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 21:07:06 -0800

riffola: You have eight correct.

By: _sirmissalot_

_sirmissalot_ — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 21:09:15 -0800

somethin 'bout guns

By: uftheory

uftheory — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 21:13:50 -0800

My walk will 6 5 what comes our use 4 3 4 8 4 7 off rainbow leader up in Mr Quicksilver mat and I you and play with barbie dolls yellow hairs quonsar with BBQ I he's sew mark neighbor ching swell cute cats whoa

By: ed

ed — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 21:19:09 -0800

uftheory: Thirteen correct, two close.

By: RubberHen

RubberHen — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 21:30:33 -0800

Hmm I get 212...I think 212.... I become faint... Wine...more ...wine.....

By: mr_crash_davis

mr_crash_davis — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 21:51:02 -0800

Cute post.

By: LeLiLo

LeLiLo — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 22:03:54 -0800

For instance, the 5nd five from the left. I was moving right along in a sprightly fashion until I came to that sentence. Now I'm confused again. Also: shouldn't Crunchland be in here somewhere?

By: quonsar

quonsar — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 22:08:10 -0800

the 5nd five from the left is adjacent to the 2rd three around the median.

By: cbrody

cbrody — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 22:09:49 -0800

My slim will wooing white pant felch are you bush you from yglesias cuts primary off rainbow leader up in do Quicksilver mat the a you and thin faye barbie gold yellow hairs quonsar with bbq I he's sew karl welcome ching swell cute rove More clues please!

By: LeLiLo

LeLiLo — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 22:17:19 -0800

the 5nd five from the left is adjacent to the 2rd three around the median. Thanks. But is it metric, or not?

By: ed

ed — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 22:22:39 -0800

cbrody: Excellent work. Twenty dead on, two very close and three close.

By: cbrody

cbrody — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 22:42:54 -0800

But I still fail to see where it's headed, if anywhere.

By: ed

ed — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 22:45:01 -0800

Folks: I've just proofread the post against the key and I noticed a few mistakes. Here's the corrected post. Different values noted in italics (specifically on the following trio: "worn out its welcome," "action here without ing" and "the adjective in his main mantra has different meaning for boozehound, tartar?"). My profuse apologies to all playing the game. You've all been doing marvelously. Cinco: 2 4 4 6 5 4 5 3 3 4 3 4 8 4 7 3 7 6 2 2 2 11 4 3 1 3 3 4 4 6 4 6 5 7 4 3 1 3 2 4 5 5 5 4 4

By: donth

donth — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 22:47:12 -0800

I think the second word is "this", as in "you can go with this, or you can go with that" from the song's lyrics.

By: quonsar

quonsar — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 22:54:12 -0800

you can call me al.

By: dhoyt

dhoyt — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 23:08:49 -0800

Tee-hee, I think pemulis had the best answer.

By: dhoyt

dhoyt — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 23:32:44 -0800

Oops, I meant this.

By: WolfDaddy

WolfDaddy — Mon, 27 Oct 2003 23:42:48 -0800

Waitaminute, this is all about Milo Rambaldi, isn't it?

By: arha

arha — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 00:02:59 -0800

Late for work now. Thanks a bunch ed!

By: cbrody

cbrody — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 00:03:48 -0800

Waitanotherminute, I'm guessing that being TV-less in London makes me unlikely to be able to crack this.

By: dhartung

dhartung — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 00:18:50 -0800

Is this puzzle something you need to have time to solve? Because I do not have time.

By: LeLiLo

LeLiLo — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 00:24:32 -0800

Tee-hee, I think pemulis had the best answer. I also think pemulis is the winner so far. But cbrody's comment is most frightening, including as it does world leaders like "Bush," "Barbie" (the doll, presumably), "quonsar," and "Karl" "Rove." Barb and Karl and Bush and Quonsar. The modern Bob & Carol & Ted & Alice?

By: StrangerInAStrainedLand

StrangerInAStrainedLand — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 02:28:12 -0800

I'd like to a suggest a time transplant to benefit dhartung...possible donors: ed, riffola, uftheory

By: Civil_Disobedient

Civil_Disobedient — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 02:45:10 -0800

pemulis : I rike you. You make me raff.

By: yerfatma

yerfatma — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 04:11:45 -0800

Waitaminute, this is all about Milo Rambaldi, isn't it? Brilliance. Pure brilliance.

By: dejah420

dejah420 — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 06:48:55 -0800

Wow...that's a lot of work for a post. I'll have to keep checking back to see if anyone has solved it.

By: asok

asok — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 06:57:41 -0800

Congratulations on an interesting post, one that requires more brainpower than most. Inscrutable; verdict from the head. Brain ache - now it's time for my bed!

By: ed

ed — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 07:05:37 -0800

On the 29th day of this thread, if no one has solved it, I'll post the answer.

By: davidmsc

davidmsc — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 07:31:54 -0800

Ed! Stop teasing all of those geeks!

By: soyjoy

soyjoy — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 07:37:20 -0800

Yep, pemulis' 2nd comment is right up there with "we have cameras." That's the biggest, loudest (and, er, most onto-screen-coffee-spewing) laugh I've had on MeFi in a while. Coming in at a close second for the day is dhartung.

By: specialk420

specialk420 — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 08:10:52 -0800

where's cardoso when we need him?

By: languagehat

languagehat — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 08:22:48 -0800

I think I've discovered the key.

By: quonsar

quonsar — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 09:18:58 -0800

On the 29th day of this thread, if no one has solved it, I'll post the answer my sense is you'll be murdered well before then. especially is the solution is lame. but don't sweat it, ed. you've caught all your errors, right? {evil leer}

By: uftheory

uftheory — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 09:28:44 -0800

My guns will Mister White what comes our way. Bush 3 from Iglesias disc 7 off rainbow leader up to. Do Quicksilver Matt and I use and play with Barbie doll yellow hairs Quansor with BBQ I he's so mark 5 chung swell cute 4 this is driving me nuts... I need closure soon or I'm gonna get fired. People, please post what you got so far.

By: ed

ed — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 09:43:48 -0800

uftheory: Twenty-two correct, two close.

By: quonsar

quonsar — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 09:50:12 -0800

applesauce goes better with BBQ than quonsar.

By: shoepal

shoepal — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 10:05:23 -0800

Hey Ed, is it also a jumble? I've got BBQ and SAUCE but they ain't near each other and that just seems wrong.

By: dirtylittlemonkey

dirtylittlemonkey — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 10:06:25 -0800

"Toynbee ideas in Kubrick's 2001 resurrect dead on planet Jupiter" ?

By: Civil_Disobedient

Civil_Disobedient — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 10:08:24 -0800

I think I got it: Pour la chaleur solaire sur la mer De Negrepont les poissons demi cuits Les habitans les viendront entemer Quand Rhod et Gennes leur faudra le biscuit (Due to solar heat upon the sea By a black (metallic) bridge, fish half cooked The inhabitants shall come to collect them While Rhodes and Genoa shall want their biscuits) It's a prophesy, right?

By: mcguirk

mcguirk — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 10:09:49 -0800

Try reading every fifth word ("cinco"). I still have a lot of words that are obviously wrong though. My list, you off. Do you like BBQ sauce? This felch from rainbow Quicksilver and yellow I Ching. Will our fearless leader Matt pull hairs? He's swell. Wooing you. Pick up the life, quonsar. So cute. White Bush welling in a barbie with Karl Rove.

By: ed

ed — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 10:18:56 -0800

shoepal, mcquirk: You're both getting closer. mcquirk: Exceptional. 31.

By: mcguirk

mcguirk — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 10:21:21 -0800

It's "mcguirk".

By: ed

ed — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 10:26:07 -0800

mcguirk: sorry.

By: donth

donth — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 11:23:20 -0800

I think the first sentence is "Dubya Bush belongs in a kennel with Karl Rove." Not a good start.

By: uftheory

uftheory — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 11:31:08 -0800

My pants are off. Do you like BBQ sauce? This comes from rainbow Quicksilver and yellow I Ching. Will our fearless leader Matt play house? He's swell. Muster use disc up and with Quansor so cute. George Bush primary to a barbie with Karl Rove. so close yet so far

By: xmutex

xmutex — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 11:54:55 -0800

dude, ed, go outside. Kick a ball around. Something.

By: quonsar

quonsar — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 11:57:02 -0800

who IS this "Quansor" person?

By: uftheory

uftheory — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 11:59:46 -0800

your evil twin

By: WolfDaddy

WolfDaddy — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 12:12:13 -0800

Doesn't Quansor make huts?

By: mcguirk

mcguirk — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 12:21:53 -0800

If "pants" is right (and it looks right), it has the wrong length in the clues.

By: mr_crash_davis

mr_crash_davis — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 12:26:00 -0800

So far, I've got this: Laura Bush 7 in a 6 with Karl Rove 4 I am off do you like bbq sauce? My post comes from rainbow quicksilver and yellow I ching. Will our fearless leader Matt play along? He's swell. Crunch you keep up the beat. Quonsar so cute.

By: shoepal

shoepal — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 12:47:16 -0800

Laura Bush ??????? in a ?????? with Karl Rove.

By: amberglow

amberglow — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 12:52:32 -0800

that sounds good, crash, even if it's not the answer.

By: ed

ed — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 12:58:51 -0800

uftheory & mr_crash_davis: Good work. Both of you got 32. mcguirk: Correct. It should be 5, not 4. donth: Very close. Again, the winner is the first person who posts the complete correct answer.

By: shoepal

shoepal — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 13:00:53 -0800

?????? ??? pick up and miss Quonsar so much

By: mcguirk

mcguirk — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 13:06:14 -0800

Maybe "kennel" for where Laura and Karl are? For the Longs one, I was trying to do "well-being" - be (hive clue) == "welling"/"dwelling"? For the Woo-ping one, "ignore crane" means ignore Ping, like from the children's book? (But that's a duck, not a crane.) And "switch 1" could mean rearrange the letters o,n,e. But I can't get anywhere with that. "pick" seems right for "plectrum banjo", but I don't get the clue.

By: xmutex

xmutex — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 13:06:30 -0800

So the answer is nonsensical drivel? What an awesome puzzle.

By: shoepal

shoepal — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 13:13:20 -0800

Xmutex, only if you consider "my pants are off, do you want BBQ sauce?" drivel.

By: The God Complex

The God Complex — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 13:16:31 -0800

You guys are insane: Stan and Interrobang had the best of the bunch. Then again, I invoke the "precedent-setting fiction of Encyclopedia Brown" on a near-hourly occasion, driving those who love me away in shame.

By: mr_crash_davis

mr_crash_davis — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 13:22:10 -0800

Laura Bush belongs in a 6 with Karl Rove Pants are off do you like bbq sauce? My post comes from rainbow quicksilver and yellow I ching. Will our fearless leader Matt play along? He's swell. Crunch you pick up the beat. Quonsar so cute.

By: samw

samw — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 13:32:41 -0800

For "ignore the crane, switch 1", I though "ignore the crane" meant ignore woo-ping, like "whooping crane". But then I couldn't get more than a handful on my own, so what do I know?

By: mcguirk

mcguirk — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 13:37:53 -0800

Or maybe the crane is what holds you up when you do the flying kung-fu tricks in the movies. "Switch 1" could be "Neo"; this guy did choreography on The Matrix. Not that any of that seems to produce an answer.

By: shoepal

shoepal — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 13:38:27 -0800

Laura Bush belongs in a kennel with Karl Rove?!

By: soyjoy

soyjoy — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 14:11:00 -0800

Laura Bush belongs in a frog-march with Karl Rove?!

By: donnagirl

donnagirl — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 14:32:26 -0800

My pants are off. Do you like BBQ sauce? This comes from rainbow quicksilver and yellow I Ching. Will our fearless leader Matt play along? He's swell, helping you keep up, and with Quonsar so cute. Dubya Bush belongs in a kennel with Karl Rove. Very little of this is my own, I'll almost feel bad if I get it.

By: uftheory

uftheory — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 14:39:36 -0800

I went with ignore wooping (crane) and used Master, and switched one letter. No purchase necc. Enter as often as you like. -- My Pants are off, do you like BBQ sauce? This comes from rainbow Quicksilver and yellow I Ching. Will our fearless leader Matt play along? He's swell. Mister, you pick up the beat. Quonsar so cute. George Bush belongs in a kennel with Karl Rove

By: ed

ed — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 14:40:18 -0800

m_c_d and donnagirl: 37.

By: Yossarian

Yossarian — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 14:41:24 -0800

Have fun with that, I'm gonna go play a video game now.

By: taz

taz — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 14:57:34 -0800

I think it might begin "my good man", but then I'm confused by "off" or whatever (Mac?) from the Mac/switch link. My good man (3), do you like bbq sauce? This comes from rainbow Quicksilver and yellow I Ching. Will our fearless leader Matt play along? He's swell. Hoping you pick up the beat. Quonsar so cute. Dubya Bush belongs in a kennel with Karl Rove.

By: uftheory

uftheory — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 15:05:46 -0800

taz, Ed confirmed that clue should be 5 letters, not 4.

By: Khalad

Khalad — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 15:14:03 -0800

Hmmm.... Laura, George or Dubya? My pants are off. Do you like BBQ sauce? This comes from rainbow, quicksilver and yellow I Ching. Will our fearless leader Matt play along? He's swell. Hoping you pick up and beat Quonsar. So cute. Laura Bush belongs in a kennel with Karl Rove.

By: ed

ed — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 15:14:06 -0800

Very nice work. I think you folks will do this within 24 hours. uftheory: 41 taz: 38

By: Khalad

Khalad — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 15:15:43 -0800

Sorry Quonsar...

By: ed

ed — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 15:16:48 -0800

Khalad: 40. (Aside: Come on. Would I really encourage people here to beat Quonsar?)

By: mr_crash_davis

mr_crash_davis — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 15:35:38 -0800

"Would I really encourage people here to beat Quonsar? I would. He makes the most delicious whimpering sounds when... Uh, never mind.

By: donnagirl

donnagirl — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 15:41:11 -0800

My pants are off. Do you like BBQ sauce? This comes from 7 metaweb.com and 6 I Ching. Will our fearless leader Matt play along? He's swell. Hoping you pick up the beat, Quonsar. So cute. Dubya Bush belongs in a kennel with Karl Rove.

By: shoepal

shoepal — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 15:48:51 -0800

2 My 5 pants 3 are 3 off. 2 Do 3 you 4 like 3 BBQ 5 Sauce? 4 This 5 Comes 4 from 7 rainbow 11 Quicksilver 3 and 6 yellow 1 I 5 Ching. 4 Will 3 our 8 Fearless 6 Leader 4 Matt 4 play 5 along? 3 He's 5 Swell. 6 Hoping 3 you 4 pick 2 Up 3 the 4 beat, 7 Quonsar. 2 So 4 cute. 5 Dubya 4 Bush 7 belongs 2 in 1 a 6 kennel 4 with 4 Karl 4 Rove.

By: thatweirdguy2

thatweirdguy2 — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 15:54:50 -0800

All your 2 4 4 6 5 4 5 3 3 4 3 4 8 4 7 3 7 6 2 2 2 11 3 3 1 3 3 4 4 6 4 6 5 7 4 3 1 3 3 4 7 5 5 4 4 are belong to us.

By: uftheory

uftheory — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 16:00:54 -0800

My Pants are off. Do you like BBQ sauce? This comes from rainbow Quicksilver and yellow I Ching. Will our fearless leader Matt play along? He's Swell. Hoping you pick up and make Quonsar so cute. Laura Bush belongs in a kennel with Karl Rove.

By: amberglow

amberglow — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 16:35:45 -0800

all we need is someone to set that to music! (i hear a tinkly piano (or schroeder-esque toy piano somewhere begging to play it)

By: taz

taz — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 16:54:31 -0800

My pants are off, do you like bbq sauce? This comes from reading Quicksilver and casting I Ching. Will our fearless leader Matt play along? He's swell. Hoping you pick up the beat, Quonsar. So cute. Dubya Bush belongs in a kennel with Karl Rove. we're getting there...

By: shoepal

shoepal — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 17:10:18 -0800

I think you've got it, Taz!

By: stopgap

stopgap — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 17:18:19 -0800

My pants are off. Do you like BBQ sauce? This comes from raining quickquilver and having I Ching. Will our fearless leader Matt play along? He's swell. Hoping you pick up the beat, Quonsar. So cute. Dubya Bush belongs in a kennel with Karl Rove.

By: quonsar

quonsar — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 17:19:09 -0800

my pants are off too.

By: stopgap

stopgap — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 17:21:47 -0800

In that case Quonsar, I hope you pick up the beat. BTW, I biffed on that last post. "Quickquilver" is supposed to be "quicksilver."

By: shoepal

shoepal — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 17:22:42 -0800

My pants are off, do you like bbq sauce? This comes from reading Quicksilver and Tao Te I Ching. Will our fearless leader Matt play along? He's swell. Hoping you pick up the beat, Quonsar. So cute. Dubya Bush belongs in a kennel with Karl Rove. My head is about to explode.

By: mr_crash_davis

mr_crash_davis — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 17:28:41 -0800

I think if anyone gets it after this collaborative effort, ed ought to donate the $50 to the Metafilter scholarship fund. Or straight to Matt.

By: ed

ed — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 18:11:42 -0800

Hang on. Tallies forthcoming.

By: ed

ed — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 18:20:31 -0800

donnagirl: 40 shoepal I: 41 uftheory: 39 taz: 42 stopgap: 41 shoepal II: 42 Great work, guys. I know you can do finish this off within 24 hours. Very close!

By: piedrasyluz

piedrasyluz — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 18:28:56 -0800

But there's got to be a twist! It couldn't simply be the guessing of seemingly nonsensical phrases (although Dubya and Rove in a Kennel makes sense to my mind...) In keeping with the team approach here, I'll post where I am headed with this cypher. If I am wrong, it's because my imagination got the better of me. The word clues that are derived from the URLs are merely the middle layer of the cypher. However, without it, you cannot know the nature of this steganographic puzzle. My suspicion (I am currently about 100 pages from the end of Neal Stephenson's Quicksilver) is that Ed has used a similar scheme to the one described here. The key to this puzzle is found in Neal Stephenson's book Quicksilver, in which one of the characters, Eliza, uses a binary cipher to encrypt her correspondence. The "key" in her messages is always a symbol from the I Ching. I am going to guess that the symbol used here is this one Now don't go rush out and buy Quicksilver just because it will help you solve this puzzle - rush out and buy it because it's a darn good read. Good luck.

By: piedrasyluz

piedrasyluz — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 18:58:12 -0800

Oops. Darn frames. The I Ching symbol I meant to link to was here

By: stopgap

stopgap — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 19:18:07 -0800

Okay, I compared a bunch of responses with ed's tallies, and I think I found two answers that must be wrong, but I'm not certain about it. First, no one has gotten 6: jaundice? in a certain way; consult the tome's title I can't figure out what Burger King has to do with anything, though the next clue in that line is a link to Stephen King. The tome here could be either the I Ching or Quicksilver. I'm not sure about this, but it looks like 5: first thing's first, in more ways than one is also wrong. The various responses to this one haven't affected tallies at all. I've seen George, which could be the first president's first name. Dubya, for the first letter of "White House." And Laura, but I don't know how anyone got that, other than it's five letters long. I can't think of any other responses, so maybe my figuring is off on this one. I think 7: a natural public preface must be "reading," but that answer doesn't make sense to me. By my calculations there's still one more wrong answer that the last several responses all had in common.

By: shoepal

shoepal — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 19:21:10 -0800

My pants are off, do you like bbq sauce? This comes from reading Quicksilver and ?????? I Ching. Will our fearless leader Matt play along? He's swell. ?????? you pick up the beat, Quonsar. So cute. Dubya Bush belongs in a ?????? with Karl Rove. Hey Stopgap, I was on the same track, but I think the kendoll/kennel answer is a stretch.

By: mr_crash_davis

mr_crash_davis — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 19:25:50 -0800

"Laura, but I don't know how anyone got that" Well, "first thing's first" seemed a natural fit for the "first lady's first" name. At least, it did to me. Now, "in more ways than one" doesn't make a whole lot of sense, but does any of this?

By: donth

donth — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 19:44:54 -0800

Hoping is probably wrong, since the crane should be ignored. Yuen, switch 1: unless? un-something?

By: samw

samw — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 19:51:55 -0800

7: a natural public preface must be "reading," but that answer doesn't make sense to me. I didn't come up with "reading" myself, but I wish I had; do you remember "Reading Rainbow"? <off -topic> piedrasyluz: The description of that cipher doesn't make any sense to me. It looks like the cipher-text ends up being 1/5 the length of the plain-text. So there has to be information loss, so the receiver can't get back the full message. If the key is the two alphabets and you reverse the process described, all you get is the order in which the alphabets were chosen, but not the characters within the alphabets. Am I missing something? </off-topic>

By: ed

ed — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 19:52:54 -0800

shoepal: latest one is 40. Nice process of elimination strategy with the question marks, but I'll give you the figure anyway. :)

By: amberglow

amberglow — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 20:01:09 -0800

golden i ching????

By: stopgap

stopgap — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 20:11:00 -0800

Can someone explain how "he wants, particularly in this context" (4) is "like?"

By: amberglow

amberglow — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 20:13:50 -0800

stopgap, maybe it's a reference to him being a closet case? ; >

By: amberglow

amberglow — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 20:24:33 -0800

maybe it's WHITE instead of Dubya? the first "thing" is the white house, and it's a really white place, being that only white presidents have lived there. That would make the next word not Bush then tho.

By: shoepal

shoepal — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 20:26:17 -0800

I agree Stopgap, "like" doesn't really fit there. At this point I am beginning to doubt a lot of the answers that seemed logical up until this point. Piedrasyluz's comments haven't helped my sanity, either.

By: amberglow

amberglow — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 20:39:55 -0800

White vine? white wine?

By: donth

donth — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 20:43:57 -0800

amberglow: acronyms -> Giant Wisteria = GW

By: amberglow

amberglow — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 20:48:56 -0800

ahhh...you're right, donth : >

By: Khalad

Khalad — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 21:12:30 -0800

Hoping: Ignore crane, so try the other name listed, Heping. Switch one letter -> hoping. George/Dubya/Laura: I believe George is the right answer according to the scores ed has presented. The ones I'm having trouble with are LIKE, the jaundice word, THE (parenthetically...) and perhaps KENNEL. Oh yeah, I don't get PANTS... Here's my answer, which if I'm not mistaken will score a 43. I don't think anybody's gotten the jaundice clue, and one of the words we've all assumed is correct must be wrong. Don't know which, though. My (pants) are off. Do you (like) BBQ sauce? This comes from reading Quicksilver and (((yellow))) I Ching. Will our fearless leader Matt play along? He's swell. Hoping you pick up (the) beat, Quonsar. So cute. George Bush belongs in a (kennel) with Karl Rove.

By: mr_crash_davis

mr_crash_davis — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 21:17:45 -0800

"I believe George is the right answer according to the scores ed has presented." I don't think it is, because the clue's number is 5, and George has six letters.

By: ed

ed — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 21:18:38 -0800

Khalad: Yup. 43.

By: amberglow

amberglow — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 21:22:40 -0800

ed, does golden instead of yellow make it 44?

By: ed

ed — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 21:22:55 -0800

mr_crash_davis: Actually, my mistake (and thus a giveaway). It's six letters. I think everything else is accurate, as represented above. Again apologies.

By: ed

ed — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 21:25:58 -0800

amberglow: Nope. But that's the only individual answer I'll give here. Since we're close (and in the interest of fairness), I'm only going to offer tallies for efforts at complete puzzles. You guys have been doing a great job at eliminating the impossibilities.

By: amberglow

amberglow — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 21:28:36 -0800

: P

By: stopgap

stopgap — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 22:29:05 -0800

This might help some: the sites used show up as the top result from Google, given a certain search query. For example, "rainbows" yields the About Rainbows site as the first hit. Similarly, "Shakespeare," "pants," "plectrum," etc. yield the sites used here. Now, for the clues we can't get, here are the Google searches that yield those pages: "'Eddie Murphy' men" "ken doll" Assuming these searches were deliberate to match up with the word, this might help figure these last few out. Burger King was probably a conscious choice without using Google for anything. I thought maybe "in a certain way" could refer to "Have it your way," but I'm really stumped on that one.

By: LeLiLo

LeLiLo — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 22:42:34 -0800

I think if anyone gets it after this collaborative effort, ed ought to donate the $50 to the Metafilter scholarship fund. Or straight to Matt. That was exactly my thought too. This is a true group effort, if I ever saw one. Or else use the money to buy quonsar some BBQ sauce. (If he'll put his pants back on.) "64 years ago this week, six million Americans became unwitting subjects in an experiment in psychological warfare." This is more like "27 hours ago this week, 17167 people became unwitting subjects in ed's experiment in psychological warfare."

By: stopgap

stopgap — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 22:47:07 -0800

Just thinking about "ken doll" and "he doesn't have a D cup"... "ken doll" - "D" = kenoll = kennel?

By: mcguirk

mcguirk — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 22:47:40 -0800

samw: You are right, the ciphertext is 1/5 the length of the plaintext, but you do get the ciphertext back. For each letter in the plaintext, write down 0 if it's from the first alphabet, or 1 if it's from the second. Treat each 5-digit long group of 0's and 1's as a binary number (0-31). Now use that as an index into the regular A-Z alphabet (with some values unused or duplicates (maybe take the number mod 26)). That gives you one letter of the ciphertext.

By: mcguirk

mcguirk — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 22:49:30 -0800

(In case it wasn't clear: that means when encoding, the sender deliberately makes the plaintext five times as long as the ciphertext.)

By: samw

samw — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 22:58:33 -0800

Ah, I see. The Metaweb page has its terminology confused. "Plaintext" is the message you want to send before encoding, and "ciphertext" is the result of the cipher scheme, i.e. what you actually send to the recipient. Metaweb has it backwards. That was really confusing. Also, according the the Metaweb page, the sender was the person decrypting the message. That's a whole new way of looking at the word "sender". As I was reading it, it did occur to me that it seemed like they were doing it backwards, but it didn't occur to me that that was because they had the terminology so wrong.

By: mcguirk

mcguirk — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 23:03:51 -0800

Ah, right. And following their explanation, I continued their mistake.

By: copmuter

copmuter — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 23:08:12 -0800

First letter of word : other letters :: 0 : 1 doesn't seem to work with/without punctuation, backwards/forwards, original sequence/verse, or any combination of these for the 00001-11010-->A-Z system. ASCII looked good until i got the End of Transmit value.

By: copmuter

copmuter — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 23:08:58 -0800

or with 0 and 1 reversed

By: copmuter

copmuter — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 23:14:14 -0800

*passes into sleep trying to figure out which hexagram looks most like a Whopper*

By: donth

donth — Tue, 28 Oct 2003 23:50:49 -0800

jaundice: 2. To affect with the negativity or bitterness of jaundice. could it be "trying"? I don't get the BK connection though.

By: bargle

bargle — Wed, 29 Oct 2003 00:25:19 -0800

I like this thread. Fun read. :) My pants are off. Do you like BBQ sauce? This comes from reading Quicksilver and Yi King - I Ching. Will our fearless leader Matt play along? He's swell. Hoping you pick up the beat, Quonsar. So cute. Elder Bush belongs in a kennel with Karl Rove.

By: stopgap

stopgap — Wed, 29 Oct 2003 00:31:45 -0800

Okay, I'm going to bed after this. Here's my last try for the night. My pants are off. Do you have BBQ sauce? This comes from reading Quicksilver and liking I Ching. Will our fearless leader Matt play along? He's swell. Hoping you pick up the beat, Quonsar. So cute. George Bush belongs in a kennel with Karl Rove.

By: taz

taz — Wed, 29 Oct 2003 01:00:09 -0800

I wonder if someone who has read "Quicksilver" can give more details about the code... how is the I Ching symbol used as the key? Are we talking about a number, like symbol #20, or two numbers? The top and bottom trigrams of a hexagram? I'm very lost... Although I'm dying to read it, I haven't been able to get Quicksilver yet here in Greece - will have to order it...

By: piedrasyluz

piedrasyluz — Wed, 29 Oct 2003 01:00:16 -0800

copmuter, mcguirk and samw: The wilkins cyper in the book adds two more steps to what you have described. First, as you describe, it groups the words of the plaintext ( in our case, Ed's clue word poem) into groups of five letters. like this: mypan tsare offdo youha vebbq sauce After assigning the correct binary (a 0 or a 1) to each letter, each group of five letters represents a number in binary notation. You then have to subtract the number that the I Ching symbol represents from the number you get from each grouping of five. The resulting number gives you a letter from the alphabet, where 1=A, 2=B, C=3, etc. You should then be able to decipher the plaintext easily. I just can't figure out which I Ching symbol we need here.

By: piedrasyluz

piedrasyluz — Wed, 29 Oct 2003 01:06:48 -0800

Taz, The Hexagram for each I Ching symbol can be read as binary notation: For example, "Lin" looks like this: ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ________ ________ Which, if an unbroken line is a 1 and a broken one a zero, would give you: 000011 , which in binary notation is "3".

By: taz

taz — Wed, 29 Oct 2003 01:22:16 -0800

piedrasyluz, I think it could be #13, which symbolizes "community" (us/metafilter), and has "fire" as the bottom trigram. (The Burger King link says "the fire is ready"). Or possibly #30 which is fire over fire. You can see all the fire-related hexagrams in the fifth row of this page.

By: stopgap

stopgap — Wed, 29 Oct 2003 01:32:33 -0800

I don't think the Wilkins cypher applies here because we can't have two separate and distinguishable alphabets to assign binaries. The description of the Wilkins cypher before said that it required a handwritten message.

By: mcguirk

mcguirk — Wed, 29 Oct 2003 01:33:58 -0800

piedrasyluz: How are you assigning the 0s and 1s?

By: taz

taz — Wed, 29 Oct 2003 02:16:33 -0800

Maybe it's "Taoist" I Ching - "taoist" from the Yellow Emperor (jaundice plus king). My pants are off. Do you like BBQ sauce? This comes from reading Quicksilver and Taoist I Ching. Will our fearless leader Matt play along? He's swell. Hoping you pick up the beat, Quonsar. So cute. George Bush belongs in a kennel with Karl Rove. btw, there is actually a book called "The Yellow Emperor's Book of Secret Correspondence"... I can't stop finding connections from everything to eveything else... aaaaiiiiii!!!!

By: nyukid

nyukid — Wed, 29 Oct 2003 02:20:20 -0800

Oh come on! I scroll all the way through 145 comments and no one has figured it out yet?!?!? To be honest, I haven't even attempted to figure out how to solve the puzzle. But you guys did. So finish it! :)

By: ginz

ginz — Wed, 29 Oct 2003 02:56:27 -0800

What nyukid said. The suspence is killing me.

By: taz

taz — Wed, 29 Oct 2003 03:35:31 -0800

I'm waiting for piedrasyluz to wake up - he seems to have a plan. I think we're just about one word away from the basic message, but it looks like the rest of the decrypting is something you would have to have Quicksilver to understand, and I don't have Quicksilver... I mean, let's say that the I ching symbol is hexagram 13, and that's 111101, which is 61... now what? How is this used as a "key"? I don't understand where we go from "61" to a 0 alphabet and a 1 alphabet...

By: oissubke

oissubke — Wed, 29 Oct 2003 05:22:09 -0800

This is the greatest post ever.

By: ed

ed — Wed, 29 Oct 2003 05:48:33 -0800

bargle: 42 stopgap: 43 taz: 43 Okay, here's some additional help. Wheels: 7 4 3 4 4 2 1 4 5 5 8 4 7 2 6 2 6 4 3 4

By: ed

ed — Wed, 29 Oct 2003 06:03:14 -0800

sorry, that should read "add one of bunker twins, last elided"

By: samw

samw — Wed, 29 Oct 2003 06:08:20 -0800

piedrasyluz: if ed's poem contains contains the message, but is not the message itself, then it is the ciphertext, not the plaintext. This is what the Metaweb article had confused. Also, if the I Ching key is applied in that way, then that step is just a glorified rotation cipher, which should take all of a few minutes to crack. So all that remains is to figure out how ed is encoding 1s and 0s in the FPP, one digit per character in the decoded poem. Given that we (well, they, I guess) are generating the actual text of the poem, how could ed reliably encode that bit?

By: ed

ed — Wed, 29 Oct 2003 06:19:41 -0800

Re: Wilkins. Interesting theories, but you folks give me too much credit. Consult supplemental clue and I think you'll have it.

By: djspicerack

djspicerack — Wed, 29 Oct 2003 06:27:50 -0800

who needs DDOS attacks when you can have one of these on various websites... Great stuff, ed - I'm sure we will see the productivity index for the USA drop after this...

By: shoepal

shoepal — Wed, 29 Oct 2003 06:54:44 -0800

Thanks a lot, ed. Just when I had given up! Wheels: Advance area mis turn film of ? Home Attack(5) blink searches verb routing by window to carson ???? ??? that

By: ed

ed — Wed, 29 Oct 2003 07:04:11 -0800

djspicerack: The plot, of course, is to reduce productivity so that more jobs might be created for the unemployed. shoepal: Six, two very close.

By: donth

donth — Wed, 29 Oct 2003 07:27:18 -0800

My pants are off. Do you want BBQ sauce? This comes from reading Quicksilver and trying I Ching. Will our fearless leader Matt play along? He's swell. Hoping you pick up the beat, Quonsar. So cute. George Bush belongs in a kennel with Karl Rove.

By: shoepal

shoepal — Wed, 29 Oct 2003 07:54:04 -0800

Wheels: Support info his line film of a home sorry blink searches verb routing by window to online john two that

By: taz

taz — Wed, 29 Oct 2003 07:55:22 -0800

okay, breaking it up again in to groups of five, here's shoepal's first stab: advance of searches to area (1) verb carson mis home routing (4) turn attack by (3) film blink windows that _______________ and here's mine: program of searches to (4) a then cache (3) been routine real (4) abort by two film blink (6) site obviously, I haven't started to make heads or tails of this, and just put down my first impulse on each clue, just as shoepal probably did.

By: taz

taz — Wed, 29 Oct 2003 08:00:06 -0800

of course, maybe "wheels" means that we don't use the "five" breakdown, in which case.... *falls right over the edge*

By: shoepal

shoepal — Wed, 29 Oct 2003 08:06:03 -0800

I'm with you taz. Wheels has 6 letters. Cinco has 5. but Cinco also means five. ARRRGH!!! combining some of our guesses I get this as the first line: program of searches to find a verb online (using every 5th word), which is amusing, to say the least.

By: shoepal

shoepal — Wed, 29 Oct 2003 08:25:22 -0800

program info his line film of a been abort blink searches verb routine by window to online real two that program of searches to find a verb online his been routine. real line abort by two film blink window site

By: piedrasyluz

piedrasyluz — Wed, 29 Oct 2003 08:36:25 -0800

Wow. What a difference sleep makes. With Ed's news that there isn't another encryption layer to this, I can't help but feel a little deflated. I was beginning to feel all sleuth-like, and had wonderful dreams involving enigma machines...

By: taz

taz — Wed, 29 Oct 2003 08:43:57 -0800

oh, my. My clock is winding down... I was just waiting for everybody else to wake up, but now I'm at 7 p.m. of a winter's eve, and it's been dark since, what? five? And I can't think in the dark... I'm leaving you to it, shoepal and piedrasyluz - I hope you get some support. I'll be checking in again, come morning in Europe.

By: donth

donth — Wed, 29 Oct 2003 08:44:26 -0800

old man's word = it's ?

By: ed

ed — Wed, 29 Oct 2003 08:52:40 -0800

donth: 43 shoepal (his first attempt since my last post): 8, 2 very close taz: 6, I think. But listen to shoepal. Cracking supplemental should yield clues to first.

By: shoepal

shoepal — Wed, 29 Oct 2003 09:04:59 -0800

Donth, could you elaborate?

By: soyjoy

soyjoy — Wed, 29 Oct 2003 10:05:49 -0800

shoepal, I assume donth is referring to it's...

By: piedrasyluz

piedrasyluz — Wed, 29 Oct 2003 10:11:35 -0800

Aaargh! Damn filtering software here at work has me completely handicapped. I can't get at half the links in the supplemental clue, and quite a few in the original. Guess I'll just have to watch from the sidelines. However, given that we are 2 words away from solving this (assuming that there were 45 clues and others have scored as high as 43), I have to ask: Where is the payoff? If the puzzle is something very close to the meaning conveyed in the phrases we have deciphere so far, then what is the overall message? The first sentence, "my pants are off, do you like bbq sauce" is next to meaningless, the second tells us of Ed's inspiration for coming up with the game, the third sentence is a teaser to get more mefiers to join in solving it, and the last sentence, while I agree with the sentiment, is a non sequitur. Where is this going Ed?

By: carsonb

carsonb — Wed, 29 Oct 2003 10:32:14 -0800

Wheels: Advance area mis turn film of ? Home Attack(5) blink searches verb routing by window to carson ???? ??? that first, it was weird reading a bunch of deciphering efforts and feeling all conspiratorial and stuff, then seeing my name out of the blue. then, now that y'all are in a code-breaking mood (and obviously not in the mood for work), you should check out this. warning: following link may result in loss of entire day's work, if not more.

By: destro

destro — Wed, 29 Oct 2003 12:34:58 -0800

Don't know if this helps, but the last line seems to be a reference to "wagging the dog", à la your Wilson/Plame scandal.

By: mr_crash_davis

mr_crash_davis — Wed, 29 Oct 2003 13:23:23 -0800

Much in the manner of the gardening accident which claimed the life of John "Stumpy" Pepys, perhaps this puzzle is best left unsolved.

By: shoepal

shoepal — Wed, 29 Oct 2003 13:59:38 -0800

I hear ya, Mr_Crash_Davis. If anyone needs me, I'll be out back making mash potato mountains and drooling incessantly.

By: Civil_Disobedient

Civil_Disobedient — Wed, 29 Oct 2003 14:31:35 -0800

Hey, when is the enjoy part supposed to come into play if you've spent hours trying to decode a non-sensical phrase? More like "decrypt and enrage".

By: soyjoy

soyjoy — Wed, 29 Oct 2003 14:49:59 -0800

"Son", he said, "you just can't quit. All the people who are remembered in history didn't quit. Thomas Edison, he didn't quit. Douglas Macarthur, he didn't quit. Elmo McCringle…" "Who?" the son burst in. "Elmo McCringle", replied his father. "Who the heck is Elmo McCringle?" asked the son. "See," the father replied, you don’t remember him. He quit!" Never, Never, Never, Give Up! (part 2)

By: pomegranate

pomegranate — Wed, 29 Oct 2003 15:05:41 -0800

Come on you guys, you can do it! Dozens of us ADHD, less intelligent, or lazier members and readers are anxiously waiting for you to come up with the answer! As Homer says, "Lisa, do my thinking FOR me."

By: quonsar

quonsar — Wed, 29 Oct 2003 15:13:57 -0800

god bless you, soyjoy.

By: ed

ed — Wed, 29 Oct 2003 15:33:42 -0800

I don't believe that anyone here necessarily gave up. After all, people do need to sleep. :)

By: tss

tss — Wed, 29 Oct 2003 15:39:59 -0800

I dunno. I think we got it close enough that most of the enthusiasm behind solving it has died down. I do keep reloading the thread, though, just in case.

By: tss

tss — Wed, 29 Oct 2003 15:41:12 -0800

(And by "we", I mean the folks who have actually taken pains to try and solve it; I don't mean to count myself in.)

By: shoepal

shoepal — Wed, 29 Oct 2003 15:57:07 -0800

Hey ed, can you tally this one, please? program find it's open film of a been abort blink searches verb routine by window to online real two that

By: shoepal

shoepal — Wed, 29 Oct 2003 16:16:07 -0800

Whoops. Substitute "teddy" for abort.

By: ed

ed — Wed, 29 Oct 2003 16:23:50 -0800

shoepal: 10, 1 close.

By: copmuter

copmuter — Wed, 29 Oct 2003 16:35:26 -0800

My pants are off. Do you love BBQ sauce? This comes from reading Quicksilver and biased I Ching. Will our fearless leader Matt play along? He's swell. Hoping you pick up the beat, Quonsar. So cute. George Bush belongs in a kennel with Karl Rove.

By: shoepal

shoepal — Wed, 29 Oct 2003 17:06:37 -0800

Hey ed, does this score an 11? ??????? ???? ??? open film of a ???? ????? blink searched verb routine by ?????? to ?????? ???? two ????

By: piedrasyluz

piedrasyluz — Wed, 29 Oct 2003 17:14:01 -0800

Supplemental: program ways it's open ogle film on a been teddy blink research verb routine by window to carson john two clue But I think copmuter's got it...

By: shoepal

shoepal — Wed, 29 Oct 2003 17:23:50 -0800

piedrasyluz, wouldn't the supplemental seem a pointless diversion if all we were missing was "biased?" I have a feeling there is more to it than getting the 44 words of the initial cypher.

By: copmuter

copmuter — Wed, 29 Oct 2003 17:26:30 -0800

Yeah, I too will be disappointed if this is it... I mean I thought the reason it was so incoherent was because ed had to match a binary code or something; if not, well...

By: destro

destro — Wed, 29 Oct 2003 18:04:26 -0800

program find it's open film on a been abort blink register verb reissue by option to winter reel two clue

By: piedrasyluz

piedrasyluz — Wed, 29 Oct 2003 18:26:28 -0800

wouldn't the supplemental seem a pointless diversion Yes, I agree - that's been my take from the beginning. However, there's this from Ed: Re: Wilkins. Interesting theories, but you folks give me too much credit. Consult supplemental clue and I think you'll have it. Reading too much into the connections to Quicksilver and its use of crytography assumes too much - specifically that Ed would assume that more than a handful of Mefiers would have already read Quicksilver. From what I can gather, no one else trying to solve the puzzle has read it but me. From this I have to conclude that while Ed was inspired by the book to come up with the idea of posting a cypher on MeFi, he could not have based the solution on a close reading of the text of Quicksilver. That would be patently unfair. So I am eliminating the whole binary/I Ching key theory and I am going back to square one. Question: How was the key word "cinco" employed to unscramble the word clues in the original set of clues? And how does this apply to the supplemental set of clues? Ed, I think you owe us a tally...

By: ed

ed — Wed, 29 Oct 2003 20:07:13 -0800

copmuter: 43 shoepal: 9 piedra: 12 destro: 8 And, piedra, thanks. Understand that the last thing I want to do here is be a Geraldo inticing you with Al Capone's vault. So to be perfectly clear, the highest tally has been 43. The supplemental clue was designed to help you folks figure out the complete puzzle, while simultaneously spicing things up so solving this didn't become too tedious an exercise.

By: piedrasyluz

piedrasyluz — Wed, 29 Oct 2003 20:51:10 -0800

Ed, can you confirm then that once we have found the 44th and 45th word clues, that the puzzle is then SOLVED?

By: cbrody

cbrody — Wed, 29 Oct 2003 21:42:23 -0800

piedra: I don't think so. It must be a cypher for something. Here's my stab at the Wheels clue: program find it's open film of a home teddy blink research verb routine by toggle to carson john tow info program of research to find a verb carson it's home routine john open teddy by tow film blink toggle info What is the significance of "Wheels", and how does this relate to Cinco? If anyone can figure this out they can probably solve the darn thing.

By: nprigoda

nprigoda — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 03:45:45 -0800

program of searches to find a word online has been routine. real line short by two film blink window site

By: sebas

sebas — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 03:59:01 -0800

program of searches to find a word online has been routine. real line short by two film blink window site So my guess is we have to fill in something in google, which in turn will give us the solution to the riddle. No if only we can find out which line. minus two words? Fascinating

By: ed

ed — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 04:41:28 -0800

cbrody: 10, I believe nprigoda: 7, I believe SUPPLEMENTAL TO SUPPLEMENTAL: Jacob's Room, second paragraph, last word before adult.

By: nprigoda

nprigoda — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 04:45:13 -0800

Okay, it isn't Virginia Wolf's Jacob's Room...

By: heimchen

heimchen — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 05:04:44 -0800

and it isn't that one.

By: heimchen

heimchen — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 05:12:45 -0800

might someone explain me why 4 is beat? i thought of 'peas'.

By: amberglow

amberglow — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 05:17:52 -0800

Beat Surrender is a (really good) song by the Jam, Paul Weller's first band. from there, the John Denver ref has to be sweet beat.

By: heimchen

heimchen — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 05:22:01 -0800

yes, but how do you come up with 'beat surrender' in the first place? i thought, it's not denver's sweet 'beat', but weller's sweet 'pea'.

By: heimchen

heimchen — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 05:22:48 -0800

ok, surrender, got it.

By: cbrody

cbrody — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 07:01:10 -0800

SUPPLEMENTAL TO SUPPLEMENTAL = early. Has anyone figured out Further?

By: ed

ed — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 07:38:55 -0800

cbrody: Nope. Simpler than that.

By: shoepal

shoepal — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 07:47:01 -0800

Ok, working on Supplemental. Here are some of the recent responses (my 9, piedraslyuz's 12 and cbrody's 10) 09: ??????? ???? ??? !open !film of !a ???? ????? !blink searched !verb !routine !by ?????? !to ?????? ???? !two ???? 12: program ways !it's !open !film on !a been teddy !blink !research !verb !routine !by window !to carson john !two !clue 10: program find !it's !open !film of !a home teddy !blink !research !verb !routine !by toggle !to carson john tow info Hopefully, this one should score 12: program ???? ??? open film ?? a ???? ????? blink research verb routine by ?????? to ?????? ???? two clue Words with a ! in front seem to be correct. I have no solid justification another than overlap in guesses. things I'm not sure about: find/ways (for the WAIS clue) teddy, carson, john (if these answers are right, then 3 of the "should be correct" words are wrong. window/toggle Been/Home (the ben&jerry website clue)

By: cbrody

cbrody — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 07:59:06 -0800

ed: Do you mean that "early" is incorrect?

By: nprigoda

nprigoda — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 08:42:10 -0800

for the wheels clue: I keep thinking of a circle, and since there are an even number of words in the clue, trying to superimpose the words on top of each other then read the clue that way (I hope you can see this as two lines): program ways it’s open film on a been teddy blink clue two john Carson to window by routine verb research

By: nprigoda

nprigoda — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 08:45:12 -0800

well, the spacing didn't work there, but I was invisioning some sort of reading like: program: clue two ways it’s john Carson open film to window on a by been routine verb teddy blink research which doesn't make any sense but I thought it was interesting.

By: nprigoda

nprigoda — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 08:49:05 -0800

sorry, that should be: program: clue two ways it’s john Carson open film to window on a by routine been verb teddy blink research

By: ed

ed — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 09:55:07 -0800

shoepal: 8 nprigoda: 12 cbrody: Yes. Incorrect.

By: shoepal

shoepal — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 10:11:06 -0800

ok. thanks ed. 4 of these are wrong. Anyone care guess which ones? program ???? ??? open film ?? a ???? ????? blink research verb routine by ?????? to ?????? ???? two clue

By: nprigoda

nprigoda — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 10:32:13 -0800

I'm going to say that routine might be close but wrong. I see where the "rout" comes from, but shouldn't the last part be a variation on "eng" from Eng and Chang?

By: shoepal

shoepal — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 10:45:21 -0800

nprigoda, ed updated and said "sorry, that should read 'add one of bunker twins, last elided'" regarding the Rout clue. I originally had routing, but routine seemed to make more sense semantically. I've been rather annoyed by Blink and Verb since they both seemed too easy. Film also seemed to easy, but maybe I am just making things far more complicated than they should be.

By: nprigoda

nprigoda — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 10:57:26 -0800

I don't know, since the supplemental clue is supposed to help us figure out how to read the message, then this definition of routing seems to make some sense: the process of selecting the correct interface and next hop for a packet being forwarded Also, I'm worried that my understanding of elided is wrong. How does routine fit that? I just need to clarify, not trying to be annoying!

By: Roommate

Roommate — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 11:00:26 -0800

Going on the original puzzle, where you collectively have 43 out of 45 correct, I'm going to hazard a guess. The word preceding "BBQ" and preceding "I Ching" seem to be the ones we need, and are not any of the following: (If I'm reading the 43's right...) like, have, want, love yellow, liking, taoist, trying, biased My pants are off. Do you need BBQ sauce? This comes from reading Quicksilver and having I Ching. Will our fearless leader Matt play along? He's swell. Hoping you pick up the beat, Quonsar. So cute. George Bush belongs in a kennel with Karl Rove. Pretty sure "having" is still wrong, but I think "need" might be right... ed? (oh, and congrats on getting a loooong time lurker to make his first post :)

By: shoepal

shoepal — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 11:49:32 -0800

Ed, are you sure that the "jaundice" clue isn't supposed to be 7, not 6? Cause Emperor fits nicely and makes sense (king, yellow).

By: shoepal

shoepal — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 11:55:08 -0800

How about "taoist I Ching?" Anyone? Anyone? Bueller? Bueller? My pants are off. Do you need BBQ sauce? This comes from reading Quicksilver and taoist I Ching. Will our fearless leader Matt play along? He's swell. Hoping you pick up the beat, Quonsar. So cute. George Bush belongs in a kennel with Karl Rove.

By: Roommate

Roommate — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 12:00:46 -0800

shoepal, I think taoist makes the most sense, but unless ed made a mistake I think it's wrong... I compared 5 of the solutions ed claimed had 43 correct, and they were identical in each case except for the two words I mentioned... since Taoist was a value in one of the solutions, it must be incorrect or ed would've said 44. I think.

By: shoepal

shoepal — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 12:04:23 -0800

My pants are off. Do you like BBQ sauce? This comes from reading Quicksilver and taoist I Ching. Will our fearless leader Matt play along? He's swell. Hoping you pick up the beat, Quonsar. So cute. George Bush belongs in a kennel with Karl Rove.

By: shoepal

shoepal — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 12:07:56 -0800

Scheisse!! Thanks Roommate. I am apparently losing my mind.

By: ed

ed — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 13:03:15 -0800

Roommate: You're on the right track, but it's still 43. shoepal: Yes, it's 6, although extra brownie points for a creative answer. :) All other solutions presented since my last check-in have scored 43. But again, if you crack the supplemental clue, it should help to yield the dynamic duo you're looking for. :) "Wheels," folks. Or failing that, try the supplemental to the supplemental. It's only a small trip to the library away. :)

By: shoepal

shoepal — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 13:10:16 -0800

Ed, this comes from a guy named Tim in Australia that doesn't have a Mefi Account. What's the tally? program ???? ??? open film ?? a ???? ????? blink SEARCHES SITE routine IN ?????? to ?????? ???? two SITE

By: shoepal

shoepal — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 13:13:47 -0800

Also, if this doesn't yield 43, then Roommate's theory is incorrect. Can you give us a tally, ed? My pants are off. Do you ???? BBQ sauce? This comes from reading Quicksilver and ?????? I Ching. Will our fearless leader Matt play along? He's swell. Hoping you pick up the beat, Quonsar. So cute. George Bush belongs in a kennel with Karl Rove.

By: piedrasyluz

piedrasyluz — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 14:17:35 -0800

Ok, so the supplemental clue to the supplemental clue is the following: "Jacob's Room, second paragraph, last word before adult." Here is a link to the text of Virginia Woolf's novel, Jacob's room. Second paragraph reads: "Slowly welling from the point of her gold nib, pale blue ink dissolved the full stop; for there her pen stuck; her eyes fixed, and tears slowly filled them. The entire bay quivered; the lighthouse wobbled; and she had the illusion that the mast of Mr. Connor's little yacht was bending like a wax candle in the sun. She winked quickly. Accidents were awful things. She winked again. The mast was straight; the waves were regular; the lighthouse was upright; but the blot had spread." ...unless the online Gutenberg project text is not the same as the original text of the print edition. But the word adult doesn't appear in the second paragraph. So it must be another play on words. Anyone?

By: soyjoy

soyjoy — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 14:21:23 -0800

Also, if this doesn't yield 43, then Roommate's theory is incorrect. Can you give us a tally, ed? This is getting a little like the game Master Mind. Don't give up! All of us lazy folks are counting on you!

By: ed

ed — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 15:02:35 -0800

shoepal's friend down under (hi!): 6 shoepal: 43 piedra: Yup, that matches my print copy. soyjoy: BCRG. Slowly: Welling from the point...wait a minute. Anybody have a gold nib I could borrow? :)

By: shoepal

shoepal — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 15:09:09 -0800

Well, Roommate's theory is valid (sorry to have ever doubted you, roommate). Now we just need the jaundice word and the eddie murphy word. (6) Jaundice, in a certain way; consult the tome's title can't be: yellow, liking, taoist, trying, biased (4) He wants; particularly in this context can't be: like, have, want, love

By: shoepal

shoepal — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 15:16:25 -0800

Oh, and google is now corrupted.

By: piedrasyluz

piedrasyluz — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 15:21:27 -0800

the jaundice clue is also NOT "golden" amberglow tried it already.

By: donnagirl

donnagirl — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 15:22:12 -0800

Could jaundice be "firing"? I don't know if you can "fire" I Ching, but it makes some sense. "The fire's ready" is in the BK "title" area, and fire is yellow....I'm really reaching here.

By: donnagirl

donnagirl — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 15:24:38 -0800

Just in case, since ed only tallies the full guesses: My pants are off. Do you hate BBQ sauce? This comes from reading Quicksilver and firing I Ching. Will our fearless leader Matt play along? He's swell. Hoping you pick up the beat, Quonsar. So cute. George Bush belongs in a kennel with Karl Rove.

By: piedrasyluz

piedrasyluz — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 15:32:18 -0800

Wasn't Eddie Murphy in The Golden Child? Wasn't that about a boy emperor or something? .................last remaining brain cell winks out................ Ok, enough. I have reached my breaking point. Good thing I already made quota for the month or I'd be in a lot of trouble....

By: shoepal

shoepal — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 15:33:24 -0800

Donnagirl, we're all reaching. It's ok. My thoughts on Jaundice are as follows, yellow (like yellow journalism), biased (in a certain way), also "have it your way" (BK slogan), flame -broiled (BK's "way"). Jaundice Burger King also seems to correlate well to Emperor Yellow, who apparently wrote or at least had some dealings in the origin of the I Ching. did we try "master" I ching? (yellow = mustard) I officially hate ed. (no offense, of course. That stupid "states puzzle" from a while back stole many an hour from my sad existence and now this is poised to do the same).

By: shoepal

shoepal — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 15:41:34 -0800

eddie murphy wants "gold" (comedy gold)?

By: heimchen

heimchen — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 15:48:05 -0800

My pants are off. Do you ~~love~~ BBQ sauce? This comes from reading Quicksilver and ?????? I Ching. Will our fearless leader Matt play along? He's swell. Hoping you pick up the beat, Quonsar. So cute. George Bush belongs in a kennel with Karl Rove. ~~I mean 'love' or 'date' is what this mag is about. and then maybe 'love' = laugh. wild guess, though.~~ ok, so it's not 'love'. how about 'take'? a movie-take maybe? My pants are off. Do you take BBQ sauce? This comes from reading Quicksilver and ?????? I Ching. Will our fearless leader Matt play along? He's swell. Hoping you pick up the beat, Quonsar. So cute. George Bush belongs in a kennel with Karl Rove.

By: heimchen

heimchen — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 16:06:18 -0800

are there any 'adult' words in the second paragraph of Jacob's Room by any chance? (me, being not a native english speaker.)

By: piedrasyluz

piedrasyluz — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 16:20:42 -0800

Oh god heimchen - just about every word in the english language could have "adult" connotations if one's mind is dirty enough! viz. nib, point, mast, pen

By: heimchen

heimchen — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 16:29:09 -0800

well, 'The mast was straight' 'the lighthouse was upright' in connection with 'adult' made me think of that. maybe my mind's too dirty.

By: ed

ed — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 16:38:17 -0800

donnagirl: All still at 43, but you're the closest! Plus, I'm astonished that nobody else would put the two concepts "My pants are off" and "BBQ sauce" within the same context.

By: donnagirl

donnagirl — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 16:44:24 -0800

OK, heimchen, let's try that. The word "blue" is often used to imply adultness - as in "blue movie". The last word before blue is pale. So, if that's right, what do we get? Either a pale yellow, or an implication that Eddie Murphy wants something pale? I'm not really sure what the supplemental supplemental clue does for us.... If my brain doesn't implode soon, it will be a miracle.

By: piedrasyluz

piedrasyluz — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 17:20:02 -0800

My pants are off. Do you seek BBQ sauce? This comes from reading Quicksilver and broiled I Ching. Will our fearless leader Matt play along? He's swell. Hoping you pick up the beat, Quonsar. So cute. George Bush belongs in a kennel with Karl Rove.

By: philcliff

philcliff — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 17:22:16 -0800

My Pants are off, do you spew BBQ sauce? This comes from reading Quicksilver and liking I Ching. Will our fearless leader Matt play along? He's swell. Hoping you pick up the beat, Quonsar. So cute. George Bush belongs in a kennel with Karl Rove. well thats my guess at it, I'm probably not right.

By: piedrasyluz

piedrasyluz — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 17:24:51 -0800

In my mind, broiled has only six letters.....

By: paradigm

paradigm — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 17:39:44 -0800

My pants are off, do you have BBQ sauce? This comes from reading Quicksilver and liking I Ching. Will our fearless leader Matt play along? He's swell. Hoping you pick up the beat, Quonsar. So cute. George Bush belongs in a kennel with Karl Rove.

By: mr_crash_davis

mr_crash_davis — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 17:41:45 -0800

"I'm astonished that nobody else would put the two concepts 'My pants are off' and 'BBQ sauce' within the same context." ed, has it ever occurred to you that you might possibly be insane?

By: tss

tss — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 17:53:47 -0800

I'm astonished that nobody else would put the two concepts 'My pants are off' and 'BBQ sauce' within the same context." ed, has it ever occurred to you that you might possibly be insane? No, I think I see a connection...

By: amberglow

amberglow — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 18:10:39 -0800

My Pants are off, do you fame BBQ sauce? This comes from reading Quicksilver and castin' I Ching. Will our fearless leader Matt play along? He's swell. Hoping you pick up the beat, Quonsar. So cute. George Bush belongs in a kennel with Karl Rove. ???

By: ed

ed — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 18:22:03 -0800

paradigm: 44 All others: 43

By: quonsar

quonsar — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 18:28:41 -0800

My pants are off, do you have BBQ sauce? i'll flame your ass.

By: donth

donth — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 18:35:34 -0800

ed, stopgap submitted the same entry as paradigm way back here.

By: donnagirl

donnagirl — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 18:43:48 -0800

My pants are off. Do you have BBQ sauce? This comes from reading Quicksilver and liking I Ching. Will our fearless leader Matt play along? He's swell. Hoping you pick up the beat, Quonsar. So cute. George Bush belongs in a kennel with Karl Rove. posted by stopgap at 2:31 AM CST on October 29 Scored a 43. My pants are off, do you have BBQ sauce? This comes from reading Quicksilver and liking I Ching. Will our fearless leader Matt play along? He's swell. Hoping you pick up the beat, Quonsar. So cute. George Bush belongs in a kennel with Karl Rove. posted by paradigm at 7:39 PM CST on October 30 Scored a 44. W T F E??

By: donnagirl

donnagirl — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 18:45:08 -0800

oops, apparently I should spend less time composing and more time refreshing the page.

By: piedrasyluz

piedrasyluz — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 19:12:38 -0800

Can we all scream a collective: WE GIVE UP ED! I mean, if there were some huge intellectual challenge here, I could see it going on forever. But we are all just guessing now, and it seems to me like the clues Ed came up with are just too obscure for us to make the connection. How do you get "have" from the words "he wants, particularly in this context" that link to a page about Eddie Murphy? Can someone actually explain it, or can we admit that we've all just been guessing for at least a day now?

By: crunchland

crunchland — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 19:17:59 -0800

I think ed owes all of metafilter an apology.

By: _sirmissalot_

_sirmissalot_ — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 19:27:00 -0800

I feel I need to chime in here as an impartial observer. Here's my take on puzzleology: The more complicated (or challenging) a puzzle, the greater the reward should be at the end. To see you all pull your hair out over a nonsensical, in-jokey solution is kind of sad. And ed, at least figure out your own puzzle before you post it and give inconsistent "clues." Unless you're just trying to be a jerk, in which case--kudos!

By: amberglow

amberglow — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 19:38:48 -0800

the crowd's turning on you, ed--maybe you should up the ante?

By: amberglow

amberglow — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 19:54:27 -0800

My pants are off, do you want BBQ sauce? This comes from reading Quicksilver and liking I Ching. Will our fearless leader Matt play along? He's swell. Hoping you pick up the beat, Quonsar. So cute. George Bush belongs in a kennel with Karl Rove. (my final guess) : <

By: shoepal

shoepal — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 20:18:56 -0800

My pants are off, do you need BBQ sauce? This comes from reading Quicksilver and liking I Ching. Will our fearless leader Matt play along? He's swell. Hoping you pick up the beat, Quonsar. So cute. George Bush belongs in a kennel with Karl Rove.

By: cbrody

cbrody — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 20:19:29 -0800

fwiw: My pants are off do you lack BBQ sauce This comes from reading Quicksilver and frying I Ching Will our fearless leader matt play along he's swell Hoping you pick up the beat Quonsar so cute. George Bush belongs in a kennel with Karl Rove ed, can we have something a bit more straightforward in the way of a clue? How the 4 clues relate to each other, for example. Repeated here for convenience: 1. Cinco: 2 4 4 6 5 4 5 3 3 4 3 4 8 4 7 3 7 6 2 2 2 11 4 3 1 3 3 4 4 6 4 6 5 7 4 3 1 3 2 4 5 5 5 4 4 2. Further: the _________ had ________. 3. Wheels: 7 4 3 4 4 2 1 4 5 5 8 4 7 2 6 2 6 4 3 4 4. SUPPLEMENTAL TO SUPPLEMENTAL: Jacob's Room, second paragraph, last word before adult.

By: shoepal

shoepal — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 20:27:16 -0800

lack!!!! Duh! Nice work, Cbrody! I too would like more info regarding the "supplemental" clues. My pants are off, do you lack BBQ sauce? This comes from reading Quicksilver and liking I Ching. Will our fearless leader Matt play along? He's swell. Hoping you pick up the beat, Quonsar. So cute. George Bush belongs in a kennel with Karl Rove.

By: soyjoy

soyjoy — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 20:30:06 -0800

Calpundit just posted recently about this book he's reading... Quicksilver. He notes that he's a big Stephenson fan, but that

as the pages go by and it gets harder and harder to discern any purpose or ultimate goal to the writing, my concentration is flagging.Thought some of you would enjoy that. That said, though, not to sound like a broken record or anything, but... don't give up! I've tried to stay completely out of the puzzle-solving and just be a cheerleader here, but I'd like to point out something I noticed that I haven't heard anyone say: Isn't it odd how many Q's there are in this thing? And also, isn't it kind of noteworthy that if you count "Q sauce," all five lines end in two-syllable phrases? And that one of them is "So cute" (Qt)? Also, oddly, the three syllables following "Q" syllables all start with "s." Now, some of this is coincidence, probably, and some of those words may be wrong, I guess, but maybe that's what ed meant by hoping Quonsar would "pick up the beat" - there's some rhythm, some cycle that the Qs are helpng to delineate, that will make sense of this gibberish. I'm pointing this out because I don't believe the solution of the puzzle is just getting the last one or two words right. ed has been "so cute" about not saying one way or another, but just because he said it wasn't so complicated as having an I ching-based layer doesn't mean there's not another step. So: Don't give up.

By: _sirmissalot_

_sirmissalot_ — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 20:34:40 -0800

i take back calling ed a jerk. reading soyjoy's message, it occurs to me that this might turn out to actually have an interesting solution. good luck y'all.

By: ed

ed — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 20:46:40 -0800

soyjoy: Thanks for the eloquent words. But I'd rather be honest about the situation here. This thread has wended through so many emotions, that I'm at a loss as to where it will all ultimately end up. And, as I said above, I don't want to mislead anyone here into thinking that there's riddles within riddles within riddles. The thing was devised on a moving bus, for Pete's sake. No one, as yet, has hit 45. stopgap did indeed have 44. My profound apologies. Wasn't going out of my way to be a jerk. But since I'm trying to post regular tally updates, often when I have mere minutes of spare time to do this, all I can say is that inevitably when you're scratching groups of five on the run, there will be a mistake. Mea culpa. Human error. I burn a matchbook representing myself in effigy. So the question is where we go from here. We have 44. We have a $50 prize that I've offered. And the last clue offers the complete answer. Sure, I could invent another puzzle. But that will no doubt infuriate you more, given that there is no other object other than to find the answer to the final clue. The way I see it, there are the following possibilities: (a) Continue the puzzle as planned, though without any real sense of communal accomplishment. Award $50 to the winner. (b) Reveal the complete solution and donate the $50 to Matt for Metafilter, to be used in some way that he sees fit. (c) Move to the desert, change name to Sally Redondo and start a cross-stitching school. Personally, I think (b) captures the spirit of this thread best. (c) doesn't accomplish anything, save bringing the rewards of cross-stitching to a town that desperately needs water. (a) rewards an individual for merely guessing the final clue, but leaves out the long hard work of many here. I've been very amazed by everyone's cooperative nature in cracking this thing. If it were possible to hug you, or to allow each of you the opportunity to pour BBQ sauce on my pantless legs in person, I'd gladly do it. Which is why I think option (b) works best. It gives everyone a pat on the back and gives Matt some incentive for the bandwidth we used. But I'll let the people here decide.

By: shoepal

shoepal — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 21:03:33 -0800

My pants are off, do you make BBQ sauce? My pants are off, do you lack BBQ sauce? My pants are off, do you want BBQ sauce? My pants are off, do you need BBQ sauce? My pants are off, do you miss BBQ sauce? My pants are off, do you long BBQ sauce? My pants are off, do you pour BBQ sauce? My pants are off, do you pour BBQ sauce? This comes from reading Quicksilver and liking I Ching. Will our fearless leader Matt play along? He's swell. Hoping you pick up the beat, Quonsar. So cute. George Bush belongs in a kennel with Karl Rove.

By: donnagirl

donnagirl — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 21:09:14 -0800

whoa, ed. Don't get down on yourself. I, for one, wasn't actually mad about the mis-scoring, just pointing it out and making my own injoke in the process. Can you tell me if the answer to the supplemental clue is, in fact, pale? And if that's the answer, what do I do with it? Thanks for the thread. However it turns out, it's been fun.

By: donnagirl

donnagirl — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 21:15:57 -0800

shoepal, I think the word that's wrong is "liking", and that "have" was correct. If you look at philclifff's attempt, it scored a 43. If "liking" was right, it would have been 44. I just hate to see you expend so much energy trying to replace the word that seems to be right.

By: piedrasyluz

piedrasyluz — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 21:17:03 -0800

I vote B. Shoepal? Cbrody? Donnagirl? anyone else who was actively chasing this thing? (And for what it's worth sirmissalot, the only things sadder than trying to solve an in-jokey puzzle are a) my job that allows me the freedom to goof off all day long and b) you coming in and telling us the party is over when you weren't there to get it started. B. Vote B. Let me sleep tonight...

By: piedrasyluz

piedrasyluz — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 21:19:08 -0800

But I still want to know how you get "have" out of Eddie Murphy and "he wants, particularly in this context"... that really steams me...

By: paradigm

paradigm — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 21:23:07 -0800

I've been greatly enjoying watching this thing develop, so I'll vote B without hesitation. I've never seen such a great collaborative effort to solve something online.

By: shoepal

shoepal — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 21:34:31 -0800

piedrasyluz, my sentiments exactly. (also, I vote B, but that's a given. I just want the effing answer.)

By: stopgap

stopgap — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 21:35:11 -0800

Just comparing responses, and it looks to me like "do you HAVE bbq sauce" is what scored the 44, not "and LIKING I Ching." Note this post by philcliff before paradigm posted the same response I had. On preview, donnagirl saw the same thing. Of course, two days later, "have" as a response for the Eddie Murphy clue is seeming less clear to me... Maybe something about him wanting to have men (since I think the page comes from a Google search for "'eddie murphy' men"), but it was probably more of a guess. And I went insane after actually going to the library only to find that the text of Jacob's Room matches Project Gutenburg. And "spread adult" (the last word, before adult) is nonsense. So anyway, we're at 44 on the main puzzle, and the supplementals all seem to be harder. I vote B. Oh, before I forget, let me test this. This should also be a 44: My pants are off, do you have BBQ sauce? This comes from reading Quicksilver and dammit I Ching. Will our fearless leader Matt play along? He's swell. Hoping you pick up the beat, Quonsar. So cute. George Bush belongs in a kennel with Karl Rove.

By: donnagirl

donnagirl — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 21:37:23 -0800

B is fine with me. I won't feel bad about not solving it, and I don't think there's any one person who actually "deserves" to win the prize. I'll second paradigm's comment, too. This has been cool for me because of the group effort. It's the first time I've felt like a member of mefi rather than just someone who showed up late to the party without a date.

By: ed

ed — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 21:43:09 -0800

Since it's out in the blue: Eddie Murphy Raw: "I want half, Eddie." Link to Ask Men: half of human species (i.e., particularly in this context). Thus, he wants "half" or "have."

By: stopgap

stopgap — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 21:43:51 -0800

And by the way, I'd like concur with everyone's statements about the collaborative/community effort here. Though I've been around for a long time (check out the sexy member ID), this is the first post where I've really wanted to contribute to the comments because I thought I had something to add. I've found that for almost every topic, if I wait long enough there's usually someone else here who posts what I was thinking. I don't know if this thread really makes a great MeFi FPP, but it sure was a lot of fun.

By: piedrasyluz

piedrasyluz — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 21:45:30 -0800

ANd!?!?!?!?!? What's the last word Ed! Before you jaundice my opinion of you permanently!

By: shoepal

shoepal — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 21:48:58 -0800

re: half/have, that's rather weak, ed. Perhaps overly clever. How about "Gilded I Ching" My pants are off, do you have BBQ sauce? This comes from reading Quicksilver and gilded I Ching. Will our fearless leader Matt play along? He's swell. Hoping you pick up the beat, Quonsar. So cute. George Bush belongs in a kennel with Karl Rove.

By: wobh

wobh — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 22:07:13 -0800

My pants are off. Do you have BBQ sauce? This comes from reading Quicksilver and dragon I Ching. Will our fearless leader Matt play along? He's swell. Hoping you pick up (the) beat, Quonsar. So cute. George Bush belongs in a kennel with Karl Rove.

By: shoepal

shoepal — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 22:12:27 -0800

Nice work, wobh.

By: piedrasyluz

piedrasyluz — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 22:34:47 -0800

Did Ed go to bed? Maybe premature, but: MOST. ANTICLIMACTIC. POST. EVER.

By: mokujin

mokujin — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 23:10:49 -0800

the google ads on this page are almost as perplexing as ed's puzzle.

By: stopgap

stopgap — Thu, 30 Oct 2003 23:14:44 -0800

oh wow, saddle potties!

By: LeLiLo

LeLiLo — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 05:47:26 -0800

re: half/have, that's rather weak, ed. It's not the best clue, but half also = halve. halve/have is a bit better.

By: shoepal

shoepal — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 06:45:53 -0800

Agreed, Lelilo. I was just taking out some frustrations on poor old Ed. I'm sure he doesn't take it personally. At least I hope he doesn't. To be honest, Ed, this has been a lot of fun.

By: soyjoy

soyjoy — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 07:30:48 -0800

Well, ya see, that's why I wasn't doing the puzzle-solving. I'm just too quick to see patterns in things, as someone pointed out on another thread I'm not gonna look up. It still seems really odd to have all those Q's (cues, don'tcha see???...) Ahem. That said, I vote d) For foisting all of this upon us (it has been fun, especially for those of us who didn't do any of the work, but I think we can all agree the ends here fails to justify the means), ed has to take the original "solution" and divine a superb extra-layer of solution for all of us to "enjoy."

By: Roommate

Roommate — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 07:32:23 -0800

darn it, I was hoping it would be solved this morning, so I could stop obsessing over it. :) My pants are off, do you have BBQ sauce? This comes from reading Quicksilver and honing I Ching. Will our fearless leader Matt play along? He's swell. Hoping you pick up the beat, Quonsar. So cute. George Bush belongs in a kennel with Karl Rove.

By: Roommate

Roommate — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 07:48:29 -0800

on wheels: program ways it's open film of a been teddy blink research verb routine by window to carson john two info I know a lot of these are wrong, but I think we need to use every 6th word (instead of 5 in the previous clue) program a routine two ways been by info it's teddy window open blink to film research carson of verb john well, it started out good, anyway...

By: cbrody

cbrody — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 08:32:48 -0800

I give up. "Half/have" is not even close to being a homophone in British English (think of your audience, ed!) If the other missing clues are this tenuous it's not worth the effort. May as well guess every word in the dictionary. ed, as we're all about ready to throw in the towel anyway, just give us a hint, without the full solution, if that's possible. Please?

By: shoepal

shoepal — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 08:47:17 -0800

My pants are off, do you have BBQ sauce? This comes from reading Quicksilver and bronze I Ching. Will our fearless leader Matt play along? He's swell. Hoping you pick up the beat, Quonsar. So cute. George Bush belongs in a kennel with Karl Rove.

By: shoepal

shoepal — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 09:05:31 -0800

My pants are off, do you have BBQ sauce? This comes from reading Quicksilver and book of I Ching. Will our fearless leader Matt play along? He's swell. Hoping you pick up the beat, Quonsar. So cute. George Bush belongs in a kennel with Karl Rove.

By: ed

ed — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 10:28:03 -0800

cbrody: Think of the way Murphy was pronouncing it. SUPPLEMENTAL TO CLUE 45: Card catalog entry: Sans king, don't roll the bones. There are ways in the title.

By: piedrasyluz

piedrasyluz — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 10:30:14 -0800

Ed, here's a gun. Come on, take it. Put me out of my misery. I'm begging you. Shoepal, maybe you'll do the honors? Ed, spill it.

By: ed

ed — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 10:41:39 -0800

Okay, I will spill the answer at 6PM PST. Fair? I don't want anyone killing himself over this. :) roommate: 13

By: wobh

wobh — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 10:46:40 -0800

I wasn't going to try again but: My pants are off. Do you have BBQ sauce? This comes from reading Quicksilver and broken I Ching. Will our fearless leader Matt play along? He's swell. Hoping you pick up (the) beat, Quonsar. So cute. George Bush belongs in a kennel with Karl Rove.

By: shoepal

shoepal — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 10:48:08 -0800

Come on Piedrasyluz, we can get 45. We can't let ed beat us.

By: wobh

wobh — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 11:01:09 -0800

Hey, a new clue.... I think I'm right this time. If I'm not, ed has some explaining to do.

By: ginz

ginz — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 11:04:31 -0800

In this proud land we grew up strong We were wanted all along I was taught to fight, taught to win I never thought I could fail No fight left or so it seems I am a man whose dreams have all deserted I've changed my face, I've changed my name But no one wants you when you lose Don't give up 'Cause you have friends Don't give up You're not beaten yet Don't give up I know you can make it good

By: Roommate

Roommate — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 11:06:00 -0800

jaundice? in a certain way; consult the tome's title and Card catalog entry: Sans king, don't roll the bones. There are ways in the title. (I'm assuming this clue '45' is also for that elusive 6 letter word). "way" appears twice. Does that mean anything? (BK's old slogan, "have it your way"?) which tome? Quicksilver or I Ching? (or neither?) Sans king, leaves "burger". card catalog entry? don't roll the bones? nope... still got nothing. on preview: wobh, I hope you do. :) don't see how 'broken' fits the clues, though...

By: stopgap

stopgap — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 11:06:53 -0800

My pants are off. Do you have BBQ sauce? This comes from reading Quicksilver and deluxe I Ching. Will our fearless leader Matt play along? He's swell. Hoping you pick up (the) beat, Quonsar. So cute. George Bush belongs in a kennel with Karl Rove.

By: ginz

ginz — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 11:19:46 -0800

Jaundice, coward, hepatitis. Just babbling here.

By: stopgap

stopgap — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 11:20:33 -0800

I'm feeling good about deluxe. Consider this book by Stephen Karcher. I noted before that this Burger King clue came just before a Stephen King clue. Thus, "card catalog entry: sans King" = Stephen. Also, "don't roll the bones" could lead to "de-lucks" = deluxe. Finally, if this isn't right I think I'm going to cry.

By: stopgap

stopgap — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 11:28:23 -0800

Stephen Karcher also wrote WAY of the I Ching.

By: shoepal

shoepal — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 11:28:29 -0800

Roll the bones is a Rush song. Don't roll the bones. don't rush? card catalog entry john berger's Ways of Seeing? My pants are off. Do you have BBQ sauce? This comes from reading Quicksilver and seeing I Ching. Will our fearless leader Matt play along? He's swell. Hoping you pick up (the) beat, Quonsar. So cute. George Bush belongs in a kennel with Karl Rove.

By: wobh

wobh — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 11:31:56 -0800

It fits the clues via a slightly less tortured line of reasoning that my other guess "dragon". Here goes: The Other 'tome' here is Quicksilver: Baroque Cycle Vol. I. "If it ain't baroque, don't fix it." The card catalogue entry is going to be under Baroque Cycle (Cycle == "Wheels" btw). The first part of the clue is even stupider. 'Broken' in a certain way is 'breaking' which can be broken up into the 'king' of burger king and 'brea' which isn't jaundice but is 'tar' which can be like 'amber' and in a certain way, the La Brea redundancy is like amber. Or in the new clue: 'Don't roll the bones.' If this isn't right ed owes me $50 anyway.

By: shoepal

shoepal — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 11:31:56 -0800

whey is yellow!! My pants are off. Do you have BBQ sauce? This comes from reading Quicksilver and ways of I Ching. Will our fearless leader Matt play along? He's swell. Hoping you pick up (the) beat, Quonsar. So cute. George Bush belongs in a kennel with Karl Rove.

By: stopgap

stopgap — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 11:32:16 -0800

Oh, and "the" shouldn't be in parentheses. Someone must have taken the "parenthetically" from the clue and put it into their response.

By: shoepal

shoepal — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 11:35:36 -0800

I'll buy you a beer, Wobh.

By: stopgap

stopgap — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 11:38:15 -0800

Hey, a little excitement is coming back to this thread. We might just make it to 6PST after all.

By: Roommate

Roommate — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 11:52:16 -0800

wobh: truly you have a dizzying intellect. I hope you're right. Or stopgap's "deluxe". Mainly, I'm too impatient to wait 6 more hours for the answer. :)

By: shoepal

shoepal — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 11:55:46 -0800

If anything, we've all learned a lot of homonyms, synonyms, and homophones.

By: bargle

bargle — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 11:55:54 -0800

My pants are off, do you have BBQ sauce? This comes from reading Quicksilver and Queen's I Ching. Will our fearless leader Matt play along? He's swell. Hoping you pick up the beat, Quonsar. So cute. George Bush belongs in a kennel with Karl Rove. (english.....doesn't make sense really - but what the hell)

By: bargle

bargle — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 12:04:04 -0800

My pants are off, do you have BBQ sauce? This comes from reading Quicksilver and Steve's I Ching. Will our fearless leader Matt play along? He's swell. Hoping you pick up (the) beat, Quonsar. So cute. George Bush belongs in a kennel with Karl Rove. this is even more of a job of stretching it. not sure he even did i ching, just tao...but i have no other ideas.

By: bargle

bargle — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 12:13:36 -0800

bargle, read the thread, why don't ya. so my mitchell and a karcher as well. karcher more likely than mitchell now that i see that guess above..... in fact i like deluxe better than any other answer so far.

By: shoepal

shoepal — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 12:40:56 -0800

Yellow, casting, having, golden, yi king, taoist, trying, biased, firing, master, liking, castin, frying, dammit, gilded, dragon, deluxe, honing, book of, bronze, broken, seeing, ways of, queen's, steve's My pants are off, do you have BBQ sauce? This comes from reading Quicksilver and binary I Ching. Will our fearless leader Matt play along? He's swell. Hoping you pick up the beat, Quonsar. So cute. George Bush belongs in a kennel with Karl Rove.

By: donnagirl

donnagirl — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 12:47:10 -0800

OK, I think shoepal has it with "seeing". It works with the card catalogue part of the clue, and it ties back to jaundice better than deluxe does, jaudiced eye being a reference to seeing the world in a certain weary way. I don't know what it has to do with the rolling bones, but I've decided not to let little trivialities like not understanding bother me here.

By: shoepal

shoepal — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 13:31:03 -0800

Whoa. Freaky. Fascinating.

By: piedrasyluz

piedrasyluz — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 13:33:12 -0800

My pants are off, do you have BBQ sauce? This comes from reading Quicksilver and flying I Ching. Will our fearless leader Matt play along? He's swell. Hoping you pick up the beat, Quonsar. So cute. George Bush belongs in a kennel with Karl Rove.

By: shoepal

shoepal — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 13:40:00 -0800

Glad to see you haven't quit, piedrasyluz.

By: piedrasyluz

piedrasyluz — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 13:41:58 -0800

Shoepal - re: fascinating. I do reccommend reading Quicksilver - Stephenson works a lot of that kind of detail into the narrative. Leibniz uses the binary interpretation of the characters of the I Ching to act as a key to his encrypted letters to Eliza. Cool stuff. Calpundit's review doesn't do it justice, particularly when you see it from the perspective of it being the first in a cycle of at least three long works. I live for long hard slogs of books, rich in detail...

By: donth

donth — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 13:50:26 -0800

My pants are off, do you have BBQ sauce? This comes from reading Quicksilver and taking I Ching. Will our fearless leader Matt play along? He's swell. Hoping you pick up the beat, quonsar. So cute. George Bush belongs in a kennel with Karl Rove.

By: shoepal

shoepal — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 13:53:46 -0800

yarrow I Ching? Pocket I Ching? Ed, was this all just a ruse to teach us about the I Ching? Piedrasyluz, I've already got Quicksilver on my list. I haven't read any Stephenson since Diamond Age.

By: erebora

erebora — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 14:01:52 -0800

I'd just like to pipe in: I've found this thread an infinitely more interesting read than 400 Tom Swifty's. Thanks ed.

By: piedrasyluz

piedrasyluz — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 14:08:39 -0800

Well then Shoe, without sounding like a collective world-class-geek-broken-record, you must read Cryptonomicon. At university, I remember seeing a tv series called Connections, which was based on a popular book written by James Burke (it actually starred James Burke). Each episode was a fascinating, endlessly tangential yarn bouncing all over history and touching on countless scientific and historical topics and individuals. Burke also wrote a column in Scientific American of the same name. My point is that Stephenson's entire writing career is like this. He hits on something that fascinates him and then rolls with it - much of what he researched for Cryptonomicon ended up becoming the basis for the Baroque Cycle. What makes this fun is that even if the plot is weak in parts, the whiff of history is too strong to ignore.

By: ed

ed — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 14:13:10 -0800

shoepal: CORRECT! 45.

By: shoepal

shoepal — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 14:18:02 -0800

24 33 23 43 1 45 47 11 36 15 43 8 64 45 35 63 42 34 7 24 64 7 21 64 44

By: shoepal

shoepal — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 14:20:16 -0800

Um, ed, at the risk of sounding like i've lost my mind, which one is correct?

By: piedrasyluz

piedrasyluz — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 14:22:47 -0800

Well, then: that's that. And how about this coincidence: Yarrow A secure pseudorandom number generator Ed, please tell me you were aware of this program!

By: ed

ed — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 14:25:15 -0800

THE ANSWER FOR THE MAIN PUZZLE: The inspiration behind the puzzle was, as piedrasyuz mentioned, indeed Eliza’s encrypted letters in Neal Stephenson’s Quicksilver. I was particularly intrigued by the idea of one simple phrase holding the key to how sentences and symbols could be expanded to form messages, much like a ZIP file on a hard drive. And I also recalled the cipher that Stephenson had placed on his own site before Quicksilver came out. (See this for how it was unraveled.) The idea stuck in my noggin until, on Monday night, my geek-oriented brain couldn’t concentrate on anything else. But instead of using a specific binary cipher (which I knew would have MeFites tarring and feathering my ass), I simplified it to create a message in sets of five. The puzzle was constructed by providing a hyperlink with a title tag that referred to something on the page or something within the context of the page that offered a clue to the word’s meaning. Each link was given a number, which signified the number of letters in each word. As initially discovered by elpapacito, “Cinco” was the big clue that the set of numbers was split into five separate sentences: each one composed of nine words. The sequence appeared in this order: A-B-C-D-E, with this sequence recurring until each sentence was completed. I included the clue “BBQ” and “SAUCE” together as the big giveaway, a revelation discovered by shoepal. The correct answer is: MY THIS WILL HOPING GEROGE PANTS COMES OUR YOU BUSH ARE FROM FEARLESS PICK BELONGS OFF READING LEADER UP IN DO QUICKSILVER MATT THE A YOU AND PLAY BEAT KENNEL HAVE SEEING ALONG? QUONSAR WITH BBQ I HE'S SO KARL SAUCE CHING SWELL CUTE ROVE These five sentences were scribbled onto lined paper on a moving bus, and madness followed. I made efforts to vary the difficulty of the clues, and to apply the answers across a wide swath of highbrow and lowbrow references. Everybody here should pat themselves on the back for the community effort at solving the puzzle. A lot of the instinctive guesses led themselves into partial solutions and very clever thinking from all. What follows are explanations behind all of the clues: CLUE: missing pivotal pronoun ANSWER: MY EXPLANATION: Link to George Harrison’s “I Me Mine.” The title, with its alliteration and pronouns, allowed you to insert “My” as the missing one. CLUE: you couldn't go with that ANSWER: THIS EXPLANATION: Link to Fatboy Slim’s “Weapon of Choice.” As voiced by donth, the key lyric, “You can go with this, or you can go with that” singled out the appropriate word through process of elimination. CLUE: assuming his nick wasn't bill ANSWER: WILL EXPLANATION: Link to Shakespeare’s Complete Works. William can be shortened to “Will” or “Bill.” Process of elimination provides the answer. CLUE: ignore the crane, switch 1 ANSWER: HOPING EXPLANATION: Link to martial arts choreographer Woo-ping Yuen. The idea was to draw attention to “whooping crane” and switch merely one letter (“W”) to “H.” Upon seeing the value 6, the user could then remove the unnecessary O (again “switching 1”). CLUE: first thing's first, in more ways than one ANSWER: GEORGE EXPLANATION: Link to the White House. The clue was meant not only to draw attention to President Bush’s first name, but to point out that this was the beginning of one of the five sentences. CLUE: he emails now, discounting propriety for clue ANSWER: PANTS EXPLANATION: Link to Mister Pants, who gave up blogging for email updates. Discounting propriety, of course, removes “Mister” and leaves “pants.” CLUE: NSFW verb ANSWER: COMES EXPLANATION: Link to picture of sperm. “Comes” is the intransitive form of a verb that describes what might be happening in the picture. CLUE: feeling lucky? then expand ANSWER: OUR EXPLANATION: If you type in “R” to Google and hit “Feeling Lucky,” a link to The R Project comes up. Expanding R to its voiced form provides “our.” CLUE: Kay Lee's gotta go ANSWER: YOU EXPLANATION: A link to the Ukulele Hall of Fame. Again, cheap wordplay. Remove “Kay Lee” and you’re left with the letter U. CLUE: consider acronyms and taxonomy ANSWER: BUSH EXPLANATION: Link to the short story “The Giant Wistaria.” Reducing the story to its acronym provides “G.W.” – the first two initials of President Bush. And, of course, a wistaria resembles a bush. CLUE: he croons, he sings; first phrase, to second person ANSWER: ARE EXPLANATION: Link to Neil Diamond, singer of “I Am, I Said.” The intonation of “he croons, he sings” was meant to refer to this song. And the first phrase in second person is “You Are.” CLUE: beyond the change, did he mention how close? ANSWER: FROM EXPLANATION: Link to psychologist Erich Fromm, who wrote the autobiography Beyond the Chains of Illusion. The bad pun was meant to refer to how close “Fromm” was to “From.” CLUE: he burned bridges across the weir ANSWER: FEARLESS EXPLANATION: Link to Rafael Yglesias, who wrote the book Fearless. This was turned into a movie starring Jeff Bridges and directed by Peter Weir. CLUE: a lot of trouble when you consider shorthand ANSWER: PICK EXPLANATION: Link to The Ultimate Plectrum Banjo Player’s Guide. Shorthand for “plectrum” is, as any guitar player knows, “pick.” CLUE: the hive isn't spoken for ANSWER: BELONG EXPLANATION: Link to Long’s Drugs. The hive was a reference to “bee,” which hadn’t been spoken for. CLUE: well, if you can't flip it on... ANSWER: OFF EXPLANATION: Link to the Apple Switch Campaign. Switches can be turned on or off. Process of elimination yields the answer. CLUE: a natural public preface ANSWER: READING EXPLANATION: Link to a rainbow. “Reading Rainbow” is a television show produced by PBS (the PUBLIC Broadcasting System). Thus, moving before “rainbow” publicly produces the answer. CLUE: it thanks the academy ANSWER: LEADER EXPLANATION: Link to Academy Leader. The noun thanks the adjective. CLUE: subtract the service ANSWER: UP EXPLANATION: Link to UPS, which stands for United Parcel Service. Subtracting the third word gives us the acronym UP. CLUE: granting amnesty helps it check; but it's in the green ANSWER: IN EXPLANATION: Link to Holiday Inn Towel Amnesty Day. On the page, there is a green sign for “Holiday Inn.” Reducing “Inn” to “In” produces the answer. CLUE: to be fair to pants, he's not the only one getting stiffed; ergo... ANSWER: DO EXPLANATION: A reference to the Mister Pants clue, reproducing the impropriety of removing “Mister.” The link was to Mr. Do, a 1980s arcade game. What’s left? CLUE: ostensibly, the source ANSWER: QUICKSILVER EXPLANATION: Link to Quicksilver Metaweb, a collection of annotations to Neal Stephenson’s book. The source? CLUE: worn out its welcome ANSWER: MATT EXPLANATION: Link to Welcome Mat. What’s left? CLUE: parenthetically more important; consult title ANSWER: THE EXPLANATION: The title of the linked article is “A Genuine (And Definite) Article.” Concentrating on “definite article” then has us considering the definite article in the English language, which is “the.” CLUE: opposite the last clue ANSWER: A EXPLANATION: Quite literally the opposite. The indefinite article is “A.” CLUE: something's missing ANSWER: YOU EXPLANATION: Link to words formed by AEIO. The letter U is missing from the five major vowels. CLUE: the clue will talk if you kill one ANSWER: AND EXPLANATION: Link to “Talk to the Hand.” Removing one letter (H) reveals AND. CLUE: all work and nothing; it precedes this mighty hillock; see the second clue ANSWER: PLAY EXPLANATION: Referring to the Shakespeare reference in the second clue, but also a reference to WS’s “The play’s the thing.” As if to close the deal, there’s a second phrase referred to: “All work and no play.” CLUE: not denver's sweet, but weller's turn ANSWER: BEAT EXPLANATION: Link to Surrender, apparently an online RPG. Musical reference. John Denver wrote “Sweet Surrender” and Paul Weller wrote “Beat Surrender.” CLUE: he doesn't have a D cup ANSWER: KENNEL EXPLANATION: Link to Ken Doll. If you put the two words together, you have “KENDOLL,” and, if this word were a woman, the D cup on this word could hypothetically be located where the D and the O are. Removing this creates “KENLL.” But you’re struggling for a vowel and you come up with “KENNEL.” CLUE: he wants, particularly in this context ANSWER: HAVE EXPLANATION: Link to Eddie Murphy interview at Ask Men. In the film Eddie Murphy Raw, Eddie Murphy performed an infamous routine where his divorced wives “wanted half, Eddie.” I specifically linked to Ask Men because I figured that referring to half of the people on the planet might yield the same connotation. CLUE: jaundice? in a certain way; consult the tome's title ANSWER: SEEING EXPLANATION: Link to Burger King. Jaundice was meant to refer to “John Berger,” who wrote the famous book, Ways of Seeing. CLUE: don't trim, just hop ANSWER: ALONG? EXPLANATION: Link to The Long Hair Site. You don’t want to trim the hair. Furthermore, “hopping” ‘long with it will produce “ALONG.” CLUE: simple clue ANSWER: QUONSAR EXPLANATION: Direct link to Quonsar’s profile. CLUE: out doctors and borders; what's left? ANSWER: WITH EXPLANATION: Link to Doctors Without Borders. Removing “out,” “doctors” and “borders” leaves WITH. CLUE: sans stacey; add ralphie's gun before; further hint: acronym ANSWER: BBQ EXPLANATION: Link to Stacey Q. Remove Stacey, refer to Ralphie’s BB gun in A Christmas Story, and you have an acronym. CLUE: he needs something from yul brynner ANSWER: I EXPLANATION: Link to Stephen King’s site. Yul Brynner starred in The King and I. What King needed. CLUE: my guess is he doesn't laugh much; insert apostrophe ANSWER: HE’S EXPLANATION: Link to a guy named Martin Van Hees. He doesn’t laugh much, because he’s not “heeing.” This reduces “hees” to “hes.” Insert the apostrophe. CLUE: action here without ing ANSWER: SO EXPLANATION: Link to sewing.com. Action is “sew.” Reduce it to two letters and it’s “so.” CLUE: surname's verboeten ANSWER: KARL EXPLANATION: Link to Karl Marx. The surname is verboeten in more ways than one, given that we’re talking about Karl Rove, who wouldn’t want to be compared to Karl Marx. And removing the surname “Marx” leaves Karl. CLUE: this adjective in his main mantra has different meaning for boozehound, tartar? ANSWER: SAUCE EXPLANATION: Link to Fred Rogers. His mantra was “You Are Special.” Alcohol is referred to as “sauce” by some. Thus, the boozehound might be looking for the special SAUCE, which could be tartar. CLUE: stop dancing and dwell on the sound ANSWER: CHING EXPLANATION: Link to Cha-Ching. Stop dancing and you no longer cha-cha. You have CHING. CLUE: second is redundant, but necessary here ANSWER: SWELL EXPLANATION: Link to Surf Swell Island. Swell is redundant without the “and.” But it provides the clue. CLUE: what's in a name? ANSWER: CUTE EXPLANATION: Link to an image named “cute.jpg.” The name of the file provides the answer. CLUE: subtract second ANSWER: ROVE EXPLANATION: This one was tricky. It linked to two pictures of Rovers. But the answer comes from subtracting the second R. SUPPLEMENTAL SOLUTIONS TO FOLLOW

By: stopgap

stopgap — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 14:34:13 -0800

Aw, man. I feel dumb. I thought of "seeing" a day or two ago because it sort of rhymed with "I Ching" but ruled it out because it didn't make any sense to me then. I think I went with "liking" instead. Of course, "seeing" would have been a guess then. Seeing ed's solution suddenly makes more sense. I viewed that last supplemental as an alternate clue, but it was just to make the first clue clear.

By: piedrasyluz

piedrasyluz — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 14:40:11 -0800

Come on though Stopgap and shoepal - that YARROW bit is too incredible for words: Here's the link again for those of you who missed it: http://www.schneier.com/yarrow.html That would have been a much cooler ending to this whole ordeal - something that is directly related to crytography, is a strange way of saying yellow (jaundice) and is related to the I Ching. Bummer....

By: shoepal

shoepal — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 15:02:00 -0800

Yeah, Piedrasyluz, when I saw your link I thought for sure that my yarrow guess was what clinched it, not my john berger reference, which came out of the WAIS clue, the Burger King (sans king) and as donnagirl mentioned, the jaundiced eye (seeing). Yarrow crypto coincidence is really bizarre. As I've mentioned before, I actually learned a lot from this game. Thanks Ed. And thanks to everyone that played along, posted interesting links, ideas, guesses, and of course all those witty remarks.

By: ed

ed — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 15:13:52 -0800

SOLUTION TO SUPPLEMENTAL PUZZLE When people were struggling for the last two clues, I devised a second puzzle that pointed to these answers. This puzzle, however, was never solved. The codeword “wheels” was meant to evoke the number four. The most common number associated with “wheels” is four -- either through cars, “four wheel drive,” etc. Thus, the supplemental answer is as follows: CONCERT WAYS IT’S OPEN FILM OF A EYES NOTED BLANK FRACTION VERB ROUTINE BY SWITCH TO CARSON JOHN TWO NOUN Revealing the following sentences: Concert film. Noted routine. Carson. Ways of Blank by John It’s a fraction. Switch two. Open eyes. Verb to noun. Putting these two sentences in a two-by-two formation, we have: Concert film. Noted Routine. Carson. It’s a fraction. Switch two. Johnny Carson was mentioned in the Eddie Murphy routine in his concert film, Eddie Murphy Raw. This evokes HALF. Switch two involves switching the last two letters of HALF to get HAVE. Ways of Blank by John Open eyes, verb to noun. Ways of Seeing can be inferred from Ways of ___________. The clue also involves opening your eyes and converting a verb to a noun. Now as to the individual clues themselves, we have: CLUE: within, pro forma ANSWER: CONCERT EXPLANATION: Link to Carnegie Hall, where concerts are the pro forma events that go down. CLUE: wide load ANSWER: WAYS EXPLANATION: Link to Wide Area Information Systems. Obviously, too wide for our load. Abbreviating it, we get WAIS, or WAYS. CLUE: old man's word ANSWER: IT’S EXPLANATION: Link to Monty Python official site. The first three seasons of the television show had an old man saying the word, “It’s” right before the opening credit sequence. CLUE: logo left to right ANSWER: OPEN EXPLANATION: Link to PEN/Faulkner Award site. If you look at the circular PEN logo next to the word PEN, you have OPEN. CLUE: of two, unscramble first ANSWER: FILM EXPLANATION: Link to Flim Flam Sportsfishing. The two referred to in the clue are “flim flam.” The first is “flim.” Unscrambling this gives us “film.” CLUE: kerouac stole an f ANSWER: OF EXPLANATION: Link to Offroad USA. Jack Kerouac wrote On the Road (as opposed to Off the Road) and thus stole an F from “off.” CLUE: why not? ANSWER: A EXPLANATION Link to What Would the Fonz Do? The Fonz’s catchphrase on Happy Days was “Ayyyyyyyy.” However, when you eliminate Y (“why not”), you merely have A. CLUE: the first makes solid sense ANSWER: EYES EXPLANATION: Link to Ben and Jerry’s, one of the largest ice cream vendors in the world. The idea was to turn “the first,” ICE, into a solid sense (aka EYES). CLUE: in early days, his mother might have said this ANSWER: NOTED EXPLANATION: Link to Ted Bundy. The idea was that in Ted Bundy’s early days, his mother would tell him, “No, Ted,” when scolding him. Through negative association, this could have turned him into a mass-murderer. CLUE: who needs a number? ANSWER: BLANK EXPLANATION: Link to Blink 182. On its face, “who needs a number” would seem to focus towards BLINK. But my idea here was that, with what you take away, you need to replace it. You’re not actually being asked to remove it. The clue is “who needs a number.” What’s left? Blink _______. Or a blank. CLUE: before recherche google, consult the suffix ANSWER: FRACTION EXPLANATION: Link to Google France. Your main ACTION (i.e., search) will involve pressing the button “Recherche Google.” Consult the suffix (.fr) and you get FRACTION. CLUE: right here, not now ANSWER: VERB EXPLANATION: Link to Verb Now. Points to VERB, after eliminating NOW. CLUE: add one of bunker twins, last elided ANSWER: ROUTINE EXPLANATION: Link to Rout. Eng and Chang were the Bunker twins. I was leaning on the former. Drop (or elide) the G. And you have ROUTINE. CLUE: no good ANSWER: BY EXPLANATION: Link to Goodbye. No good leans to bye, or BY. CLUE: quality for mac? ANSWER: SWITCH EXPLANATION: The linked Toggle site calls for “quality software for Windows.” The idea here was to SWITCH to Mac, thus hoping for the “quality software for Mac.” CLUE: also, ma, why not? ANSWER: TO EXPLANATION: Link to Y Tu Mama Tambien. Eliminating “why,” “ma” and “also” leaves tu, or TO. CLUE: another johnny ANSWER: CARSON EXPLANATION: Link to Carson City. Throwaway clue. Another type of Johnny is CARSON. CLUE: see previous clue; or consult rod ANSWER: JOHN EXPLANATION: Link to Fishing with John review. Relating to Johnny from previous clue, and also John himself, who carries the rod CLUE: unmix recipe ANSWER: TWO EXPLANATION: Recipe for Chicken Wot. Unmixing “wot” gives us TWO. CLUE: what you really want to find ANSWER: NOUN EXPLANATION: Link to a site that claims it will help you look for that “person, place, thing, or information.” A noun, traditionally, is a person, place or thing, and thus the answer.

By: ed

ed — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 15:18:06 -0800

Now, since we're going with option (b), Matt, how do I get you the cash? The owl hoots at midnight. Wink wink.

By: piedrasyluz

piedrasyluz — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 15:26:58 -0800

And the Jacob's Room clue?

By: shoepal

shoepal — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 16:56:22 -0800

More importantly, what does it all mean? There's no hidden meaning in the 5 sentences? What is the BBQ sauce reference all about? Why are your pants off? Why is Quonsar so cute? Why are George and Karl in the kennel? Was it really just your public transit stream of consciousness converted to numbers, linkified and posted to torture us all? Not that I need a deeper meaning. I'm just curious in a Toynbee sort of way.

By: ed

ed — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 17:43:00 -0800

Jacob's Room clue: Last word before adult. At 18, you become an adult. The seventeenth word in the second paragraph is "for." shoepal: Don't worry. I'm checking myself in. :)

By: cbrody

cbrody — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 19:04:12 -0800

So that's it is it? The answer is a meaningless, ungrammatical string of words, with no further meaning whatsoever? This is shameful. Thanks for wasting our time for nothing, ed.

By: soyjoy

soyjoy — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 19:45:37 -0800

Ed, I'm going to put this as gently as I can - unlike, ahem, cbrody - but in retrospect, if the solution was gonna be so meaningless, don't you think maybe you should've started with a shorter puzzle so that you could've paid more strict attention to the quality and accessibility of the clues, as well as to the correct numbers of letters and to your own tallies? I say this because although many of us have had a lot of fun, a great deal was generated amongst ourselves for each other, and some of it, significantly, was in spite of you. Yes, you provided the opportunity, but you're gonna continue to get heat for screwing up that opportunity to a large extent. Ed, I've done quite a few British-style crosswords, so these cute type of clues are not unknown to me. But some of yours are just so far out there I can't imagine how you thought someone would follow your train of reasoning. Some of the time, it seems, people got the correct word in spite of your version of solving it, filling it in pretty much by context. For one thing, an "acronym," which you use at least twice, is not just a string of letters; they have to form a word that you can say for it to be an acronym. What you meant was "initials." Giving people a wrong term as your clue is a big no-no when you're being so abstruse in the first place. There are other things. "Special Sauce" is not tartar sauce. Special Sauce goes on Big Macs. Tartar sauce goes on Filet-O-Fishs. They're two different sauces. So again, nobody who didn't share your misconception would be able to work through that clue...and so on, and so on, getting more nitpicky... "A" is not the opposite of "THE," articles don't have opposites; adjectives, verbs, adverbs, prepositions do. The opposite of an article is no article. etc. So maybe if you'd just stuck to the ones you were really really confident in and put forward a shorter puzzle it would have been easier to solve along the lines you had conceived and you wouldn't have gotten so many people upset at the tremendous anticlimax involved. In fact, there's still time. Sit down and start on the next one now, ed. Only this time, omit the word "acronym" and stay outa McDonald's. Keep the clues a consistent quality, like in a good crossword puzzle. Make the payoff something fantastic. You can do it, ed! In other words... DON'T GIVE UP!

By: wobh

wobh — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 22:05:43 -0800

Part of me is relieved. I've never heard of John Berger or of his book Ways of Seeing so I don't have to feel too bad because I pretty much doomed to fail. I'd never have figured that one out.

By: shoepal

shoepal — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 23:29:26 -0800

Wobh, Berger's book(s) is(are) a good read. You should check it out. Hey ed, despite the (potential) backlash, I had a blast. Some of the clues were a bit obtuse, but that's what made it so challenging. You're not a professional and we knew that and thus gave you room for error. I harbor no ill will towards you. This has been a lot of fun and has introduced me to Stephenson's Quicksilver, several interesting Mefites, and the I Ching. Thanks for giving us the opportunity. You put a lot of effort into this post and I for one appreciate it.

By: donnagirl

donnagirl — Sat, 01 Nov 2003 16:42:12 -0800

me too

By: amberglow

amberglow — Sat, 01 Nov 2003 17:06:53 -0800

likewise--i even got an email from someone following this (and waiting for signups to be reopened) with suggestions : > (and do one again next year for us, ed)

By: soyjoy

soyjoy — Sat, 01 Nov 2003 17:58:22 -0800

Next year, yeah, that's it. You have exactly 360 days to craft the next one, ed. Don't let us down. Another vote for Ways of Seeing - a little dated now, but definitely worth checking out.

By: ed

ed — Tue, 04 Nov 2003 15:46:56 -0800

Next year? Okay. We'll see. :)

By: davidmsc

davidmsc — Tue, 04 Nov 2003 17:39:37 -0800

No. Don't do it, ed. It hurts too much.