Don't believe, don't don't don't believe the hype

November 26, 2003 10:37 AM

Make this year's xmas a special one by buying the Flavor Flav Talking Alarm Clock with five alarm phrases "Bass In Your Face, Get Up Get Down, Yo G Yo, Yeaa Boy." Have you seen any other similarly bizarre gifts on sale this holiday season?
posted by mathowie (27 comments total)

Best. Clock. EVER.
posted by afx114 at 10:44 AM on November 26, 2003

As much as I like Flavor Flav... eighty-five dollars?!?
posted by Prospero at 10:45 AM on November 26, 2003

OK, that's four phrases - what's the fifth?
posted by starvingartist at 10:46 AM on November 26, 2003

How about Boner the Humping Hound?
posted by rushmc at 10:47 AM on November 26, 2003

There's always the popular Star Trek: First Contact - Starfleet Travel Set.

Includes:

* Star Trek Collectable Wallet
* Star Trek Soap
* Star Trek Cologne

Star Trek Cologne. Heh.
posted by hipnerd at 10:48 AM on November 26, 2003

That's so frickin hot.
posted by KnitWit at 10:56 AM on November 26, 2003

Actually those are five "wakeup jingles" (the fifth is Fight The Power). The only wakeup phrase available seems to be "Rock that shit, Homie!" The voicing is done by James Earl Jones (not really, but how cool would that be?)
posted by stupidsexyFlanders at 11:00 AM on November 26, 2003

posted by y2karl at 11:01 AM on November 26, 2003

I'll stick to my Tweety and Sylvester talking alarm clock, from 1978 - When the alarm clock (wind up) goes off, A little battery powered motor makes Sylvester chase chase Tweety Bird around and around on a little pedestal (beneath a plastic house which also holds the wind up clock) and at the same time a built in tiny phonograph plays over and over a scratchy track (on a tiny record) of "I thought I saw I puddey tat. I DID see a puddey tat!......." (then some pitch about how it's important to wake up or the cat will eat the bird.
posted by troutfishing at 11:09 AM on November 26, 2003

I still wanna Plague Dome...
posted by nickmark at 11:11 AM on November 26, 2003

A Michael Jackson Bar Mitzvah t-shirt.
posted by liam at 11:21 AM on November 26, 2003

And the award for most literal interpretation of 'hard-to-find gift' goes to...
posted by mr_crash_davis at 11:28 AM on November 26, 2003

I still wanna Plague Dome...


*Extreme uniqueness may vary

Marvellous
posted by devon at 11:30 AM on November 26, 2003

Man that sucks, you can't hang the clock around your neck too. Think they might of had something there if you could about a decade ago.
posted by thomcatspike at 11:43 AM on November 26, 2003

liam,

them's some great shirts.
posted by hackly_fracture at 11:49 AM on November 26, 2003

Unit Price $85.00
Yikes!
posted by anastasiav at 12:22 PM on November 26, 2003

Your two one-stop-shops for all your weird-ass holiday gift-giving needs:

Archie McPhee
Oriental Trading

Stick with tradition, that's what I say.

Plus one: T-Shirt Hell
posted by anastasiav at 12:29 PM on November 26, 2003

Really! $85.00!? I'm sure there are CD electronic clocks that'll wake you to your favourite tune for less.

Wackest clock I have is the Kellog's Cornflake rooster. Bought for a few proof of purchases and $10.00. That thing does sound like a rooster, a little shrill but would definitely wake the dead.

Those camo golf balls are a hoot. I remember pulling a prank on one of my foursome by distracting him from his tee and replacing his ball with an exploding compressed chalk golf ball. He took a swing and the thing just pulverized! What a sight.
posted by alicesshoe at 12:31 PM on November 26, 2003

The Dr FrankenFurter Celebriduck is pretty bizarre. Especially since it's in it's 2nd edition.

Actually the whole concept of a celebriduck is bizarre to begin with, so I don't know what that makes Dr. Frankenfurter.
posted by jeremias at 1:29 PM on November 26, 2003

Isn't this a little late? He could have cashed in back in the day.
posted by 2sheets at 3:35 PM on November 26, 2003

Holiday season? It's bleeding November.

Oh OK then, the fabulous Booger Board (that's bogey board in english).
posted by squealy at 3:45 PM on November 26, 2003

That's funny. I thought Flavor Flav usually sported a giant Swatch watch, not an Ecko.
posted by jonp72 at 4:33 PM on November 26, 2003

And the award for most literal interpretation of 'hard-to-find gift' goes to...

Hmmmmm....
Hard To Find Gift....
Hmmmmm....
"Weapons of Mass Destruction in a Can".
Hmmmmm....

Excuse me, I gotta go print some labels...
posted by wendell at 5:05 PM on November 26, 2003

Pierre the Louisanna Alligator Slumper for me, please.

Or maybe the PC-1805 submarine. Who cares if it's used?
posted by Smart Dalek at 6:19 PM on November 26, 2003

Flavor Flav got chronometers of his own
posted by trondant at 6:36 PM on November 26, 2003

I'm cold lampin my way to get one of these right now. How much did you say it was again?
posted by djspicerack at 3:34 AM on November 27, 2003

For merchandising cross-contamination, this year you can't beat the Singing Talking Simpsons' Mr. Burns as Ebenezer Scrooge Figure (with lamppost). From the same people who brought the dancing hamsters to mechanical life.
posted by wendell at 8:30 AM on November 27, 2003