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April 9, 2004 1:01 PM Subscribe

Done Deal: Script and Pitch Sales.Find out which scripts are being scooped up these days. Read the site and anxiosly await Krakatoa:

During the 1883 volcanic explosion off the coast of Java, social, political and cultural orders were also in major turmoil. But during all this turbulence, a romance is able to develop.

It's like Pearl Harbor and Volcanon, but with a twist!
posted by jonah (18 comments total)

Come for the movies, stay for my bad spelling!
posted by jonah at 1:02 PM on April 9, 2004

Title: Phone
Log line: A reporter changes her cell phone number after writing a controversial article that results in death threats. But when a friend's daughter answers the new phone and shows increasingly bizarre behavior, the reporter begins to investigate a mysterious string of deaths that have haunted her phone number's previous owners.

Remake of Korean Film

We're doing remakes of rip-offs now? Sure sounds like a Ringu inspired story...

(Imdb page for the Korean Phone here)
posted by PinkStainlessTail at 1:13 PM on April 9, 2004

Metroid, directed by John Woo.

Scary.
posted by linux at 1:35 PM on April 9, 2004

Maybe this time they'll get the location of Krakatoa right (hint: it's not east of Java.
posted by Sidhedevil at 1:38 PM on April 9, 2004

I'm glad to see that the John O'Neill story is being filmed. I read that New Yorker article, and kept thinking it would be a good movie.
posted by bingo at 1:39 PM on April 9, 2004

Metroid, directed by John Woo.

Scary.

scary? or kick ass!!!!1
posted by joedan at 1:43 PM on April 9, 2004

scary? or kick ass!!!!1

Only if they keep the squared-off look and bizarre colors of the original levels.
posted by vorfeed at 2:11 PM on April 9, 2004

Title: Honeymoon With Harry
Log line: A man loses his fiancée two days before their wedding and must go on his honeymoon with his fiancee's father, who hates him, in order to scatter her ashes.

Just when I think Hollywood is out of ideas, they surprise me with drek dipped in dross. Truly, Hollywood is the Great Satan.
posted by haqspan at 2:16 PM on April 9, 2004

Honeymoon with Harry sounds just a little to close to Weekend at Bernies for my comfort. I can just imagine the slapstick hilarity when the ashes get blown back into both of their faces!!!
posted by jonah at 2:47 PM on April 9, 2004

Dear oh dear. The only things on that list that aren't ever-more-desperate combinations of cliches are the things that are being adapted from existing books/articles/whatever. Sad.
posted by reklaw at 3:22 PM on April 9, 2004

Honeymoon with Harry sounds just a little to close to Weekend at Bernies for my comfort. I can just imagine the slapstick hilarity when the ashes get blown back into both of their faces!!!

Walter: Just as you took so many bright, flowering young men at Khe San, and Lan Doc, and Hill 364. These young men gave their lives, and so did Donny. Donny who loved bowling. And so, Theodore Donald Karabotsos.. in accordance with what we think your dying wishes might well have been....we commit your final mortal remains to the bosom of the Pacific Ocean, which you loved so well. Goodnight, sweet prince. (Walter dumps the ashes out of the coffee can. The wind blows them all onto The Dude.)

*hums "Nobody Does It Better"*
posted by Sinner at 4:52 PM on April 9, 2004

Reklaw, my attributal-only-to-an-uncle-in-the-business understanding is that roughly ninety percent of the current Hollywood slate is either a sequel or an adaption of existing property.
posted by Sinner at 4:55 PM on April 9, 2004

Sinner: That joke with the ashes had already been done in A Shock To The System. Shame on Joel and Ethan.
posted by bingo at 7:19 PM on April 9, 2004

bingo: I've never seen "Shock to the System," and am far too lazy to try to track down real proof, but I doubt that it pioneered the whole ash-in-the-face thing either. Sort of an obvious joke, given people's strange interest in scattering charred flesh out in the wilderness. That said, I think Lebowski did it exceptionally well.
posted by Sinner at 8:07 PM on April 9, 2004

Crap like this is why I told a friend of mine recently that if the terrorists were serious about lashing out at the Great Satan, they'd nuke Hollywood.
posted by alumshubby at 8:24 PM on April 9, 2004

Title: The Red House
Log line: A group of six revolutionary artists, called the Pre-Raphaelites, build the Red House in 1860 as a communal place to live free from the moral constraints of the repressive Victorian age. This house and their provocative lifestyle ends up turning this sacred place into one of the most shocking scandals of their time.

Is this one intriguing or scary? Granted that the PRB and circle were the Victorian equivalent of Bloomsbury, and a little exhumation never hurt anyone--but I suspect that the creative team will kinda-sorta forget about, you know, the art and poetry and stuff.

Gawd. With Gwyneth Paltrow as Christina Rossetti, no doubt. And Catherine Zeta-Jones as Jane Morris.

But speaking of exhumation, the scene where Dante Gabriel Rossetti, under cover of darkness, digs up his wife's coffin to retrieve the poems he had buried with her could really catch the fickle attention of the teen market. Add a time travel romance with a visitor from the future (Hilary Duff) and craziness ensues! A few musical numbers could spice things up nicely, too.
posted by jokeefe at 2:01 AM on April 10, 2004

Sinner: You could be right. But A Shock To The System did it only eight years before. To me, the degree of lameness in repeating someone else's gag is pretty much proportional to how recently it was done the last time.
posted by bingo at 3:03 PM on April 12, 2004

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