Comments on: I know I'm naked, could you just tell me how to get back to the hotel?

I know I'm naked, could you just tell me how to get back to the hotel?

arto — Sat, 24 Apr 2004 03:33:37 -0800

The Zompist Phrasebook may well be the only phrasebook you'll ever need. Unless, of course, you need to say something other than "The bellboy won't score me any coke!" or "Don't 'imperialist pig' me, my good man." (note: zompist.com covered here way back in the dark ages.)

By: ciderwoman

ciderwoman — Sat, 24 Apr 2004 05:47:46 -0800

Pfft, like an American tourist is going to try speaking in a foreign tongue. Tres amusant.

By: andrew cooke

andrew cooke — Sat, 24 Apr 2004 06:13:29 -0800

some of the spanish translations (don't know enough french or german to do more than guess at those) are hilarious. and which spanish-speaking country (countries? ;o) uses chileans as the sterotypical idiot in jokes?

By: amberglow

amberglow — Sat, 24 Apr 2004 08:06:03 -0800

hah! this is good. I understand your language perfectly. Je parle français comme une vache espagnole. Hablo español como un gringo borracho. Ich sprechen deutsch wie italienisch Fußballtrainer.

By: Khalad

Khalad — Sat, 24 Apr 2004 08:21:32 -0800

Ahem. I admire you above all for your purity of spirit and your appreciation of the arts. J'aimerais bien une petite gâterie, ma jolie. Si quieres chuparme el pito, no voy a protestar. Willst du mir nicht mal einen blasen, Schätzchen?

By: Johnny Assay

Johnny Assay — Sat, 24 Apr 2004 08:31:18 -0800

One of my favourites: Where is the Cathedral? Où est le bordel? ¿Dónde se da masajes? Wo geht's 'n hier zum Puff?

By: oissubke

oissubke — Sat, 24 Apr 2004 09:04:24 -0800

Können wir diesen Thread offiziell für tod erklären?

By: tommasz

tommasz — Sat, 24 Apr 2004 10:15:05 -0800

I recommend learning to duck before using most of these. Running shoes probably wouldn't hurt, either.

By: kenko

kenko — Sat, 24 Apr 2004 10:38:36 -0800

well, most of the translations are accurate, so it's not like you won't know what you're getting into when you say "Du bist sehr schön für eine Ausländerin". And the inaccurate ones (mostly quoted here already except for the directions) are pretty obvious.

By: Nelson

Nelson — Sat, 24 Apr 2004 13:07:19 -0800

I have a Berlitz Hungarian phrasebook with the helpful phrase "Is your husband at home?"

By: fatbobsmith

fatbobsmith — Sat, 24 Apr 2004 14:31:06 -0800

Not sure about the other languages, but the german translations are great. You've got to love german idioms (girls with more wood in front of the hat can't rhumba very well).

By: lazaruslong

lazaruslong — Sat, 24 Apr 2004 15:04:22 -0800

So far as I can see Heinlein is just a second-rate Ayn Rand. A mon avis Heinlein n'est rien qu'un Ayn Rand manqué. En mi opinión Heinlein no es más que un Ayn Rand de segunda categoría. Soweit ich das beurteilen kann, ist Heinlein nur eine zweitklassige Ayn Rand. *cleans chardonnay off of the keyboard*

By: George_Spiggott

George_Spiggott — Sat, 24 Apr 2004 20:54:00 -0800

Nothing compares to Joanna Russ's "Useful Phrases for the Tourist", published in Dangerous Visions. Presented here in ghastly blue-tone copyright-violate-o-rama by someone I don't know (just a google result). Brilliant reading though.