Good thoughts for Markelle

August 1, 2004 11:53 PM

The only thing that masks the pain is sleep, but even that's hard to come by.I've occasionally checked in with 17 y.o. Markelle's blog for a year or two now. While I don't know her personally, I'd consider it unlikely that she's making this up. I'd guess it's more likely that her dad actually did commit suicide. "Best of the web?" Honestly, I don't know. Perhaps it's just a glimpse at a life that might benefit from your good thoughts.
posted by scarabic (56 comments total)

My apologies if this is a hoax or just plain shitty post. I mulled it over and found it very hard to judge.
posted by scarabic at 11:54 PM on August 1, 2004

so I can be first to say: "Tarzan play world's smallest violin."?
posted by bob sarabia at 11:57 PM on August 1, 2004

damn - I was about to add: she's only 17, so be kind.
posted by scarabic at 11:58 PM on August 1, 2004

Her sister Mindy
posted by arse_hat at 12:30 AM on August 2, 2004

As the son of a father who really did kill himself, her post smells funny.
posted by spork at 12:44 AM on August 2, 2004

Scarabic, I think this is a good post. Obviously there's a weird voyeuristic aspect to peering into such a private moment in a person's life, but on the other hand reading her reaction and her sister's--especially the line "And I wish to God I could take back time and go be with him and tell him that I would do anything for him"---is very moving. It's a reminder of the awful impact suicide has on those we leave behind but also of the love that makes such a loss unbearable. Thanks for the link and if it is a hoax then please disregard these sentiments.
posted by adrober at 12:51 AM on August 2, 2004

Another sister's site not updated since Thursday.
posted by arse_hat at 1:18 AM on August 2, 2004

yeah, Tarzan play world's smallest violin
posted by bob sarabia at 3:21 AM on August 2, 2004

retired comment - all in a river
posted by bob sarabia at 3:25 AM on August 2, 2004

fall in a river
posted by bob sarabia at 3:25 AM on August 2, 2004

login? Is that you?
posted by taz at 3:58 AM on August 2, 2004

Reminds me too much of Kaycee Nicole
posted by Outlawyr at 4:00 AM on August 2, 2004

it nearly killed me when my dad died of natural causes, so i can imagine how much harder it might be with all the baggage a suicide can have. my heart goes out to anyone trying to get thru' a situation like that. whether their story is true or not, i have no idea.

Reminds me too much of Kaycee Nicole

i don't see any significant similarity - where's the long term blogging on a subject of some personal tragedy, and a devoted readership based on it...? not every lie made online is comparable to that annoyingly old and tired kaycee story.
posted by t r a c y at 4:18 AM on August 2, 2004

"My dad killed himself. Got any money?"
posted by quonsar at 5:13 AM on August 2, 2004

Yeah, I might have believed that story, if it didn't end with a "make a donation" link.
posted by reklaw at 5:19 AM on August 2, 2004

Yeah, I might have believed that story, if it didn't end with a "make a donation" link.

And the previous post wasn't a link to some "win a free iPod" scam site with a referer link in it.

"Dad's dead, send cash and while you're here because of this sensational story, click through and get me some referrals."
posted by Mayor Curley at 5:46 AM on August 2, 2004

Also, would you keep coming back to this site for the cliche teen angst, mundane activities related or the hypochondria?
posted by Mayor Curley at 5:52 AM on August 2, 2004

Here's more of her sister. NSFW

She also asks for donations. Hard to know what to make of this, but I think it's an interesting post, not a bad one.
posted by dhoyt at 6:44 AM on August 2, 2004

If it's a scam, she has other LJ bloggers participating as well (not that difficult)...
posted by jonson at 7:22 AM on August 2, 2004

.
posted by pyramid termite at 8:14 AM on August 2, 2004

Let's say it isn't a hoax. Best of the web? No.

There's plenty of tragedy to go around.

I'm not being crass, I'm just saying it's not particularly meaningful to us, as observers.
posted by abcde at 9:37 AM on August 2, 2004

I like to read people's blogs who are different than me. This one I check sometimes because she's a generation younger than me. So I guess it's the teen angst. Notwithstanding the glee over the free iPod thing (which is a pyramid scheme, not a scam, as far as I know) she's usually pretty smart and sometimes digs up good links.

I'd be really surprised at this point if it was a big scam. Rattling the donation cup is a bit annoying, true, but all the kiddies have paypal (her sister, apparently) and I doubt it took much thought to put up.

Point taken, abcde.
posted by scarabic at 10:18 AM on August 2, 2004

Somewhat OTP:

In the interests of finding out how much tragedy there is going around, I tallied up the number of results of the first 4 pages of search results of "my * just died" suggested by abcde:

Grandmother - 5 links

Dog - 4

Cat & Mother - tied at 3

Aunt, Connection, Relative, Computer, & Granpa - tied at 2

and, bringing up the rear at 1 mention each: Goat, Hope, Uncle, Camera, Truck, Cousin, Laptop, Phone, Childhood, Nana, Dad, Batteries, Brain, Z, and Parrot.
posted by jasper411 at 10:45 AM on August 2, 2004

Let's say it isn't a hoax. Best of the web? No.

But we don't know that. Which makes it interesting. If it was just a link to a mundane diary site, it wouldn't be worth discussion. But whether it's a link to a family of camwhores who lost their dad or some sort of scam, it's more interesting than most of the typical inks.

When I disparaged her site earlier, I wasn't trying to insinuate that this shouldn't have been posted. I was saying that the site would not be of any interest without the mitigating factors.
posted by Mayor Curley at 10:50 AM on August 2, 2004

Curley: Well said, I agree.
posted by abcde at 11:40 AM on August 2, 2004

I've been reading mcearstix.diaryland.com lately; she's 21 and her father also commited suicide, and now she travels the world. good stuff.
posted by Espoo2 at 12:12 PM on August 2, 2004

I've occasionally checked in with 17 y.o. Markelle's blog for a year or two now.

Then you have way too much time on your hands.

It is sad, though it doesn't belong here. On the bright side, at least he doesn't have to watch 'mindy' make soft porn cds and sell them to 40 year old men.
posted by Dennis Murphy at 12:55 PM on August 2, 2004

I dunno...maybe I'm just a cynic...but the donation link sends it into the "yeah, right" category for me.
posted by dejah420 at 1:32 PM on August 2, 2004

Thanks for taking time out of *your* obviously incredibly busy schedule to offer me that admonition, Dennis.
posted by scarabic at 2:19 PM on August 2, 2004

Perhaps you misunderstand the use of the phrase, bob. It isn't used when you think someone's lying, it's used when they're wailing and gnashing their teeth about a trivial mishap. What you seem to be doing right now is going "ha ha! Your dad killed hisself, suck it up girly girl!"

It's a little weird.

That said, yeah, the donation link seems off. "Only anonymous donations can ease the pain now!"
posted by kavasa at 2:45 PM on August 2, 2004

I can understand everyone's discomfort over "milking it for cash," but money can be a concern, quite an immediate one, when a parent dies. It looks like the girls are trying to use their internet skillz to scrape a little something together for Mom. Maybe it just makes them feel like they're doing something producitve in a situation where they've lost all control. I don't know. If it smells wrong to you, don't donate. But I don't see the harm in asking, actually. Passing the hat at a funeral is traditional. Isn't posting a paypal link to your blog-obituary just the intarweb equivalent of that?
posted by scarabic at 3:51 PM on August 2, 2004

man ... the love and compassion of this crowd is just overwhelming me ... tell me, when did the web become the premier outlet of cynicism and haughtiness for a bunch of emotionally crippled geeks? ... perhaps a donation link is a bit tacky ... but i don't think the poor girl knows any better and in her current state it's unfair to expect her to learn

i'm beginning to see the internet as something that divides people and brings out the worst in them ... and this discussion is a sad example of that

i hope she can find caring and healing from someone who sees her page ... it ain't coming from you guys, for sure
posted by pyramid termite at 5:03 PM on August 2, 2004

tell me, when did the web become the premier outlet of cynicism and haughtiness for a bunch of emotionally crippled geeks?

Shortly after it was created.
posted by keswick at 5:20 PM on August 2, 2004

"i'm beginning to see the internet as something that divides people and brings out the worst in them ... and this discussion is a sad example of that"

You know that's funny, because I'm beginning to see that the internet brings people together so they can more easily make bizarre generalizations. Ho ho! Because your interpretation of the event is, of course, 100% right and this thread is a representation of the majority of human interaction on the web. Especially the part where we hunted her down and hounded her about our suspicions that her father did not, in fact, commit suicide.

Man you have a cunning insight into human nature. I am awed.
posted by kavasa at 5:31 PM on August 2, 2004

kavasa ... if i hadn't seen this kind of thing hundreds of times in other places and here, i wouldn't be so quick to say something

it would seem that more qualified people than myself have observed similar things

http://www.rider.edu/~suler/psycyber/disinhibit.html
posted by pyramid termite at 5:51 PM on August 2, 2004

Boy did you call it, pyramid termite. I didn't want to say it myself, but what a bunch of chilly motherfuckers, in here. Can I get a high school teacher to chime in? Please?

While this kind of thing could be a scam just out there on the intarweb, I wouldn't have bothered posting it to MeFi if I hadn't been checking in with the blog for a long time and formed a good opinion of the proprietor. Apparently my endorsement is worthless, however, as is the possibility that someone out there, a mere teenager, is suffering one of the worst sources of pain imaginable. By all means, let's get back to AskMe pronto and recommence helping one another find nice things to do on our vacations.

I wouldn't ask people to cast off their skeptical skins entirely here. Skepticism is the mother of all knowedge. But there is also a time and place to be a fucking human being. The balance between the two is glaringly unhealthy here. I can't blame anyone for rolling their eyes and moving on to the next link, but those who took the time to post their bitter thoughts really give me pause about this place. Here's to hoping that hundreds of lurkers wrote her a nice email or something.

But what does one person's agony really mean in the face of bob_sarabia's opportunity to garner exactly .001 clever points with a one-line quip? (an opportunity expertly wasted, I might add)

Oh well. Shitty post, shitty comments. Mea Culpa.
posted by scarabic at 8:10 PM on August 2, 2004

scarabic Great post. Thank you. This has been fascinating for a number of reasons.

The cold response. The Internet has given rise to innumerable scams so I can forgive the skepticism about the veracity of the story and the fact that someone(s) would come out and ask for money in such a direct way just after the death of a family member is rather gauche and tasteless. I agree with some of the responses that money can often be an immediate and pressing concern in the event of a family members death and indeed it is common to "pass the hat" literally or figuratively at a funeral, but it is done by concerned friends and acquaintances not the spouse, child or parent. Also, there is indeed no end of pain in the world. But when all is said and done if it is not a scam, some children have lost a parent and a woman her companion. I don't know these people and so this does not really impact me in any real way but I have compassion for suffering fellow beings and I wish these people well and certainly no ill will.

Watching the behavior of these girls in asking the "Internet" for cash right after the death of their father. Wow. But if you share every personal up and down and inner hope and fear on the web I guess asking for money at any time is not really a big hurdle.

Looking at the three blogs involved. In going back through their archived posts I just do not understand why anyone would want to bother spending even a minute or two a day to bother reading this stuff.
posted by arse_hat at 9:17 PM on August 2, 2004

Two words. Humbert Humbert.
posted by keswick at 9:34 PM on August 2, 2004

"rather gauche and tasteless" = 17 years old. And how. I do agree that the weblog is hardly the browse-must of the the day. Something about an average kid's blog out of the suburbs is interesting to me nonetheless.

We share this internet with the kiddies, like it or not. I tend to be generous with the kids, which might diminish my credibility with the internet elite. S'okay. Yer a sick man, keswick. Thanks for givng all us penis-bearers a bad name (where are you that you imagined that as funny?).
posted by scarabic at 9:40 PM on August 2, 2004

""rather gauche and tasteless" = 17 years old. And how." True. I had almost forgot why I stopped dating teenage girls even as a teenager myself. Still, I asked my sons (21 and 22) about this and they find the money angle odd also so it's not just that being 42 has put me hopelessly out of touch. (HEY! You kids get off my lawn!)
posted by arse_hat at 9:57 PM on August 2, 2004

MetaFilter: bringing people together so they can more easily make bizarre generalizations.
posted by quonsar at 10:32 PM on August 2, 2004

arse_hat: (you have no idea how gratifying it is to address a 42 year old that way) is there any way *not* to find the money angle odd once it's been pointed out to you? The only person on this page with any reason not to shit a brick over it is me, and that's because I have prior experience with this site. Would your sons be above a Paypal link if you kicked the bucket tomorrow? Like I said, it might just be a way to feel useful amid overwhelming circumstances.

quonsar: what is it about getting old that brings us closer to childhood? I'm entirely sincere and I feel you know what I'm talking about. I appeal for a moment of ingenuousness from yourself (whom I sense to be not-unkindly toward the young'uns). What is it?
posted by scarabic at 10:49 PM on August 2, 2004

"Would your sons be above a Paypal link if you kicked the bucket tomorrow?"
Honestly scarabic that's what we have been talking about. I think they would.
They just find it bad form, as do I. Of course they are my sons. (Even more than
I would like them to be).
"arse_hat: (you have no idea how gratifying it is to address a 42 year old
that way)" Yes I do you you unimaginative twat! ;-)
posted by arse_hat at 11:21 PM on August 2, 2004

Cheers, ye imaginative, frank-talking dad, you!

If this stimulated that conversation between you, perhaps it was worth posting after all.
posted by scarabic at 11:25 PM on August 2, 2004

Hey, I'm not the one who's a regular at teh livejournal of a nubile 17-year-old with a cam. OMG!!1!1!! WTF?!?!?!!1!
posted by keswick at 11:26 PM on August 2, 2004

There are kids who have never had a website without a paypal donation link, they've never not thought to make money from their online presence so it seems reasonable to me that these sisters would automatically do the donations thing, without thinking of how it looks. I think this is a bit of a generation gap, because I've watched t r a c y for years resist the notion of putting ads or a paypal link on any of her high traffic sites, or take money from her many hostees, and I think th at's largely due to her being from the older "internet/info must be free" generation.

t r a c y nattering in my ear: "Not to mention that most people can't cope when others don't fit their idea of what a proper victim should be, so they automatically cry Kaycee when they see behaviour they don't think is appropriate for grieving, or what have you. Plus a lot of folks are terrified of feeling humiliated in public by lending support to someone who may turn out to be false. Hence the automatic anger and nasty comments." And "Did you just call me old? wtf!" (That's what you get for back seat commenting :D)
posted by zarah at 11:26 PM on August 2, 2004

It's unfortunate to me that Markelle has to answer for every teen-something who's got a skin-blog with a donations link at the very same time her Daddy commits suicide. Markelle has never shown an ounce of flesh for cash, which is one of the things that validates her blog, to me, as that of a normal person, not a camwhore. There's no shortage of young girl fleshblogs out there, but hers isn't one of them. Everyone with smug shit to say about humert humbert and porn referrals has clearly got their mind in the gutter, and only outs himself as a dirty-minded shit-for-brains by posting such comments.

Thanks, fellas, Our eyes are on you from now on, especially you, keswick, having persisted in making something sexually suggestive out of a young girl's elegy for her dead father, even after having been called out for as much. That's *taste,* my poor, obviously soul-and-brain-dead fellow, you.
posted by scarabic at 12:03 AM on August 3, 2004

Wow, um, you completely missed the point. I was ragging on you for reading a site utterly devoid of merit for a year. As for your final paragraph, allow me to retort.

elegy

1. A poem composed in elegiac couplets.
2. a. A poem or song composed especially as a lament for a deceased person.
b. Something resembling such a poem or song.
3. Music. A composition that is melancholy or pensive in tone.


That's a stretch, doncha think?

As for making something suggestive out of it, I think you'll find I didn't comment on her entry regarding her father's alleged suicide, but rather YOUR interest her site as a whole. Don't turn it around on me.

You want to talk taste? Let's talk about whoring one's grief out on the Internet, and thanks to you, one of the more popular sites on the Internet for a few bucks. Let's talk about that. Are you getting a percentage? Before or after Paypal takes theirs?
posted by keswick at 12:22 AM on August 3, 2004

OH SNAP!

There goes my percentage. You're deluding yourself if you think and of that is worth a response. Wank yourself to the young folks' blogs while their parents put guns in their mouths, if you wish. I'm absolutely flabbergasted that you think standing there with your pants around your ankles is a position you can debate this from. Holy shit.
posted by scarabic at 12:43 AM on August 3, 2004

Google has given me a last name, and here's the obits for Greeley Colorado. I don't see any possible candidates, do you?
posted by keswick at 12:45 AM on August 3, 2004

Wow, congrats for missing my point scarabic.
posted by keswick at 12:46 AM on August 3, 2004

There was a point??? Care to restate? I'm listening.
posted by scarabic at 1:11 AM on August 3, 2004

here's the obits for Greeley Colorado. I don't see any possible candidates

hmm, keswick that doesn't really mean anything. my dad's obit didn't go into the papers until 11 days after his death, and when you consider all the attendant costs (it was $300 for just the obit/photo in the toronto star) i'm assuming that a lot of folks never have one printed. not to mention that (in my very unpleasant experience) the online version of newspaper obits can be incredibly messed up.

whichever way this story turns out, and you may never find out anything conclusive, it's just not worth getting nasty over.
posted by t r a c y at 1:29 AM on August 3, 2004

uh, yah, not to mention that the supposed death of their father took place in texas, which is more likely where the possible obit would be published. dime-store sherlocks, heh...!
posted by t r a c y at 1:37 AM on August 3, 2004

fwiw:

"el·e·gy ( P ) Pronunciation Key (l-j)
n. pl. el·e·gies

1. A poem composed in elegiac couplets.
2.
1. A poem or song composed especially as a lament for a deceased person.
2. Something resembling such a poem or song.
"

That's result #1 at dictionary.com. What part of "deathsong" don't you understand, keswick?
posted by scarabic at 2:04 AM on August 3, 2004

The part where she actually wrote a song, scarabic.

t r a c y: oops.

now if you'll excuse me, i've begun on an epic project to write a consolation note and send a few bucks to everyone on the planet who has ever lost a parent. this could take a while, so i may not check on this thread ever again.
posted by keswick at 8:12 AM on August 3, 2004