Comments on: Former GOP Sen. Hecht owes life to Democratic candidate Kerry

Former GOP Sen. Hecht owes life to Democratic candidate Kerry

Postroad — Wed, 11 Aug 2004 12:59:29 -0800

Former GOP Sen. Hecht owes life to Democratic candidate Kerry "Former U.S. Sen. Chic Hecht of Nevada is a staunch Republican, but he thanks his lucky stars for Democratic presidential hopeful Sen. John Kerry of Massachusetts. On July 12, 1988, Hecht was attending a weekly Republican luncheon when a piece of apple lodged firmly in his throat." via Eschaton (Atrios)

By: Joey Michaels

Joey Michaels — Wed, 11 Aug 2004 13:02:23 -0800

Well, now I'll be looking for the Apple Orchard Workers for Truth ad.

By: ParisParamus

ParisParamus — Wed, 11 Aug 2004 13:04:43 -0800

OK. So, perhaps, in his second term, Bush will appoint Kerry Secretary of Health. Yeah.

By: PrinceValium

PrinceValium — Wed, 11 Aug 2004 13:11:04 -0800

Not blaming the victim or anything, but man is it ever stupid to go off and be alone while you're choking.

By: mikeh

mikeh — Wed, 11 Aug 2004 13:12:31 -0800

There are so many ways to joke on this without snarking on the election's outcome, Paris. Don't spoil the party.

By: stonerose

stonerose — Wed, 11 Aug 2004 13:15:10 -0800

Do we really need a Democratic candidate who's quite so soft on Republicants? Why is there a link to "Argument against Homosexual Conduct Clear, well-informed & scholarly" in the Google ads?

By: stbalbach

stbalbach — Wed, 11 Aug 2004 13:19:01 -0800

Good thing he didn't sit dumbstruck for 7 minutes while he choked to death.

By: Capn

Capn — Wed, 11 Aug 2004 13:20:56 -0800

Why is there a link to "Argument against Homosexual Conduct Clear, well-informed & scholarly" in the Google ads? John came around the corner and found Chic waiting for him. "What are you doing out here Chic? I thought you'd be at the party" "I'm 'choking' John, and I need your help" John smiled a knowing smile as he positioned himself behind Chich, wrapped his strong presidential arms around Chih's sentorian torso and began to squeeze.

By: mikeh

mikeh — Wed, 11 Aug 2004 13:26:34 -0800

I also think it's hilarious that you can, wait for the shock here, like someone as a human being, but still not vote for them. It's like when you're friends with your coworkers, but you know you'd do things differently in their places. But sometimes, only one of you gets the promotion. Congress is pretty low-key, with discussions and testimony and the like. Not like the yelling heads of the television.

By: lasm

lasm — Wed, 11 Aug 2004 13:36:14 -0800

OK. So, perhaps, in his second term, Bush will appoint Kerry Secretary of Health. Yeah. Are you suggesting that Bush still hasn't learned to chew his pretzels before swallowing?

By: loquax

loquax — Wed, 11 Aug 2004 13:38:50 -0800

Maybe Kerry did save his life, but he still stole his website from MSN.

By: briank

briank — Wed, 11 Aug 2004 13:50:10 -0800

Ann Coulter's reaction: "The turncoat Hecht deserved to die like a dog tied to a post in the Mojave Desert. That bastard Kerry (ptui -- Coulter spat) merely prolonged his worthless existence which we will inevitably snuff out with our righteous vengeance."

By: Manjusri

Manjusri — Wed, 11 Aug 2004 13:50:36 -0800

"Not blaming the victim or anything, but man is it ever stupid to go off and be alone while you're choking." That is actually a typical reaction. People think they will clear the obstruction shortly and leave the room out of embarrassment. If you see someone leaving the room while coughing and unable to speak, follow them and make sure they are ok.

By: luser

luser — Wed, 11 Aug 2004 14:09:54 -0800

Is there anything that Sen. Kerry can't do? /swoons

By: Postroad

Postroad — Wed, 11 Aug 2004 14:46:47 -0800

Cheney: some swallow. Some spit it out. GOP just chokes

By: Outlawyr

Outlawyr — Wed, 11 Aug 2004 14:49:21 -0800

If you see someone leaving the room while coughing and unable to speak, follow them and make sure they are ok. And then, when you're sure that they are ok, mock them mercilessly

By: deanc

deanc — Wed, 11 Aug 2004 15:07:41 -0800

Hey, man, I was there when this happened. Ok, not there, exactly, but I was in the junior-pages' cafeteria, at the time, on the other side of the building, and I can tell you that Kerry's heroics were nothing like his claims have made them out to be. Kerry knew he'd be running for president, someday, and was just trolling around the Republican luncheon, hoping to be conveniently "available" when someone started coughing a little to hard in the hopes that he'd be able to "rescue" him with a dramatic Heimlich maneuver. Hecht's throat got a little sore, and Kerry jumped all over him. Then Kerry convinced all the witnesses to tell the press what a big hero he was. - Luncheon Eaters for Truth

By: Peter H

Peter H — Wed, 11 Aug 2004 15:42:42 -0800

John Kerry: a breath of fresh air to Republicans and Hamsters!

By: Peter H

Peter H — Wed, 11 Aug 2004 15:44:26 -0800

... but not to Dicks and Bushes.

By: amberglow

amberglow — Wed, 11 Aug 2004 15:49:07 -0800

yeah, just how many lives has Bush saved? The count for Kerry keeps rising.

By: nath

nath — Wed, 11 Aug 2004 15:59:09 -0800

So first he kills people in Vietnam, now he saves the lives of congressmen! Killer or lifesaver? Which is it, Mr. Flip-Flopper?

By: ignu

ignu — Wed, 11 Aug 2004 16:01:52 -0800

man, if the gop wasn't so gluttonous maybe they could eat like adults and not almost die due to pretzels and apples

By: amberglow

amberglow — Wed, 11 Aug 2004 16:03:18 -0800

I wonder if Kerry would give Bush the heimlich if he was choking on another pretzel, say, right before a debate or something?

By: Peter H

Peter H — Wed, 11 Aug 2004 16:04:52 -0800

I think it's wonderful that we're in a political world where dick, flip-flop and bush are so commonly used in conversation, and often in one statement.

By: Peter H

Peter H — Wed, 11 Aug 2004 16:16:58 -0800

but dick and bush are against flip-flopping, because you need to stay hard on the issues! sorry, sorry....

By: juiceCake

juiceCake — Wed, 11 Aug 2004 16:24:41 -0800

From the piece: "Only in America can this happen, where he's working against me to get me defeated and then saves my life," Hecht said. These sorts of statements continue to astound me. It's a surprise that people put other's lives before politics? Oh, wait... On second thought, it's merely an expression of great appreciation I suppose. Waits anxiously for Faze's take on this.

By: nath

nath — Wed, 11 Aug 2004 16:41:50 -0800

These sorts of statements continue to astound me. It's a surprise that people put other's lives before politics? Oh, wait... On second thought, it's merely an expression of great appreciation I suppose. Yeah, sort of like in Family Guy when Peter gets his dad a job at the toy factory and his dad stops "to thank the man who gave my life meaning again"... and drops to his knees and prays for Jesus. "Only in America" is sort of a reflexive statement of gratitude to some people, kind of like "Praise God". (/semantic derail)

By: RavinDave

RavinDave — Wed, 11 Aug 2004 17:13:35 -0800

And in his spare time, Kerry knits American flags for orphans.

By: amberglow

amberglow — Wed, 11 Aug 2004 17:26:44 -0800

...and rushes into burning buildings to rescue pets. : >

By: five fresh fish

five fresh fish — Wed, 11 Aug 2004 17:58:12 -0800

This is a genuinely funny thread. Particularly after reading the National Lampoon thread.

By: nofundy

nofundy — Thu, 12 Aug 2004 05:41:59 -0800

Contrast to: [Karla Faye] Please spare my life, I've changed and seen the error of my ways. [Governor W - in a mocking voice] Please spare my life, I've changed and seen the error of my ways. [Governor W] Throw the switch and fry that bitch 'cause I'm a compassionate conservative! (or the Easter Bunny, whichever you believe in)