Comments on: Virtual Bartender

Virtual Bartender

Ljubljana — Fri, 12 Nov 2004 11:22:03 -0800

Virtual Bartender. A sexed-up version of subservient chicken. Despite the name, lousy at mixing drinks.

By: bondcliff

bondcliff — Fri, 12 Nov 2004 11:29:28 -0800

I was playing around with this the other day. She has no idea what a martini is but she does do wonderful things with a banana. It's a trade off, I guess. Ask her if she likes Star Wars. Then ask her for a hummer.

By: fenriq

fenriq — Fri, 12 Nov 2004 11:35:10 -0800

Who cares if she can make a good drink, she jiggles when you tell her too, she does jumping jacks when you tell her too and if that damned bouncer would get out of the way, she'd perform a wicked striptease. Waaay better than the subservient chicken. She's gorgeous!

By: Pretty_Generic

Pretty_Generic — Fri, 12 Nov 2004 11:38:52 -0800

Subservient Woman: The Other White Meat

By: Pretty_Generic

Pretty_Generic — Fri, 12 Nov 2004 11:41:40 -0800

Try "show me your ass". That's progress.

By: bondcliff

bondcliff — Fri, 12 Nov 2004 11:42:19 -0800

"Kiss a girl" works, much to my delight.

By: Doug

Doug — Fri, 12 Nov 2004 11:44:37 -0800

I feel like I'm the only idiot trying to order drinks.

By: uncleozzy

uncleozzy — Fri, 12 Nov 2004 11:46:37 -0800

I saw this today when I got to work, and I have to admit, I was actually a little embarrassed watching some of these clips (in particular, "banana" and "kiss"). I had to tilt my laptop screen way down to make sure absolutely no one else could see. Yikes.

By: Nelson

Nelson — Fri, 12 Nov 2004 11:48:41 -0800

Hey, she drank my beer!

By: Doug

Doug — Fri, 12 Nov 2004 11:50:08 -0800

She does math.

By: Hildago

Hildago — Fri, 12 Nov 2004 11:56:36 -0800

I hate that fucking bouncer.

By: Pretty_Generic

Pretty_Generic — Fri, 12 Nov 2004 11:57:01 -0800

"handstand" "change"

By: fenriq

fenriq — Fri, 12 Nov 2004 11:57:48 -0800

P_G, that was my first command! And, oh yeah! I could get that Tivo'ed for the instant replay! Such a fine booty!

By: bargle

bargle — Fri, 12 Nov 2004 11:58:05 -0800

I tried to get her to fix some drinks, she kept giving me stupid shrugs. Then I asked her if she liked the new U2 CD, she shrugged and I closed the page. Useless woman.

By: Pretty_Generic

Pretty_Generic — Fri, 12 Nov 2004 11:59:08 -0800

"write"

By: mfbridges

mfbridges — Fri, 12 Nov 2004 12:01:57 -0800

"magic" "number"

By: Pretty_Generic

Pretty_Generic — Fri, 12 Nov 2004 12:07:30 -0800

Splits! Gymnastics!

By: fenriq

fenriq — Fri, 12 Nov 2004 12:07:57 -0800

bargle, would you have preferred if she said "U2 is such a wussy little poser band that hasn't done anything new or innovative in fifteen years"? I think she was being polite, you know, when you don't have anything nice to say, say nothing and smile?

By: Cool Alex

Cool Alex — Fri, 12 Nov 2004 12:10:01 -0800

cans

By: Pretty_Generic

Pretty_Generic — Fri, 12 Nov 2004 12:11:03 -0800

tap twirl suck

By: bargle

bargle — Fri, 12 Nov 2004 12:12:37 -0800

there is a thread about this on another board i am reading. i am not trying these to see if they work, so if they do not, don't complain to me bitches. dance lick push rub shake splits stretch throw twirl fen, i'd think she was stupid either way so it would not have made any difference.

By: dobbs

dobbs — Fri, 12 Nov 2004 12:14:27 -0800

Apparently she doesn't like "Evolve" as a command. Ugh.

By: limitedpie

limitedpie — Fri, 12 Nov 2004 12:15:04 -0800

since this is not an exemplar of an uncanny valley, I suppose she's a canny valley. {omg, I cannot believe I just wrote that!}

By: bk

bk — Fri, 12 Nov 2004 12:18:03 -0800

top

By: Nelson

Nelson — Fri, 12 Nov 2004 12:24:39 -0800

Where there's top, there's bottom. Why's this so compelling? I'm not into big boobed blonde babes.

By: majcher

majcher — Fri, 12 Nov 2004 12:27:53 -0800

There's a whole bunch of suggested actions over here. Am I wrong to like the chicken better? Call me back when they put something in for "growl at blender".

By: Stauf

Stauf — Fri, 12 Nov 2004 12:30:54 -0800

Ha, best one yet: "be nasty"

By: bondcliff

bondcliff — Fri, 12 Nov 2004 12:35:50 -0800

"orgasm" and "I love you" do the same thing. Things are so much clearer now.

By: kenko

kenko — Fri, 12 Nov 2004 12:43:56 -0800

Someone tell mathowie: if you say "think" she puts on glasses.

By: mr_crash_davis

mr_crash_davis — Fri, 12 Nov 2004 12:48:49 -0800

"Show me your tits" works. Of course, that always works.

By: ewagoner

ewagoner — Fri, 12 Nov 2004 12:49:38 -0800

Here they all are: http://www.virtualbartender.beer.com/TammyClips.xml. From milkandcookies, linked above.

By: terrapin

terrapin — Fri, 12 Nov 2004 12:50:55 -0800

"Fight" has an interesting result.

By: fenriq

fenriq — Fri, 12 Nov 2004 12:52:46 -0800

Nelson, so you're into small chested brunette dogs?

By: terrapin

terrapin — Fri, 12 Nov 2004 12:53:10 -0800

ok. typing "beer.com" is my favourite :)

By: davehat

davehat — Fri, 12 Nov 2004 12:56:08 -0800

The poor girl can't sit down.

By: falconred

falconred — Fri, 12 Nov 2004 12:59:26 -0800

"Feminism" causes her to shrug and look confused.

By: terrapin

terrapin — Fri, 12 Nov 2004 13:02:10 -0800

or "sucker" Ok, I need to go home now.

By: Nelson

Nelson — Fri, 12 Nov 2004 13:14:59 -0800

looking at the XML url above reveals "riverdance", "rap", and "become a man". But now I feel like I've cheated.

By: pyramid termite

pyramid termite — Fri, 12 Nov 2004 13:39:23 -0800

i'm still waiting for my guinness ...

By: ook

ook — Fri, 12 Nov 2004 13:43:59 -0800

It's interesting how much more compelling simple interactivity is when there are breasts involved.

By: adampsyche

adampsyche — Fri, 12 Nov 2004 13:44:38 -0800

This has consumed just about my entire afternoon.

By: PrinceValium

PrinceValium — Fri, 12 Nov 2004 14:15:02 -0800

"kick me"

By: mrplab

mrplab — Fri, 12 Nov 2004 14:15:46 -0800

lol. "jedi fight" the only one with sound thus far!

By: LimePi

LimePi — Fri, 12 Nov 2004 14:38:00 -0800

Pillow fight!

By: taz

taz — Fri, 12 Nov 2004 15:10:08 -0800

Here's one for the girls: "knee".

By: ?!

?! — Fri, 12 Nov 2004 16:42:53 -0800

For you milk fans: "pints"

By: dabitch

dabitch — Fri, 12 Nov 2004 18:05:09 -0800

she does a better "Bitch on wheels" than the clueless bartenders in my hood.

By: Whistlepig

Whistlepig — Fri, 12 Nov 2004 19:09:33 -0800

"dog" Freakin hilarious if you get what she's doing.

By: euphorb

euphorb — Fri, 12 Nov 2004 20:07:57 -0800

Well, more like sun salutations.