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Batman=smart, Superman=superpowerful
January 6, 2005 10:45 AM   Subscribe

Today's weird correction from the NY Times (reg required, of course). More fuel for the old "who would win in a fight, Superman or Batman?" debate.
posted by braun_richard (37 comments total)

 
Awesome.
posted by robocop is bleeding at 10:50 AM on January 6, 2005


Sorry, make sure you scroll down to the last correction.
posted by braun_richard at 10:50 AM on January 6, 2005


Here's the text:

• An obituary of the innovative comic-page illustrator Will Eisner yesterday included an imprecise comparison in some copies between his character the Spirit and others, including Batman. Unlike Superman and some other heroes of the comics, Batman relied on intelligence and skill, not supernatural powers.

You know there was some freelance Times copyeditor who sent a terse email from his Mom's basement about this.
posted by robocop is bleeding at 10:51 AM on January 6, 2005


So they're saying Superman is an unskilled dullard? He's gonna go Krypton on someone's ass when he hears about this.
posted by picea at 10:55 AM on January 6, 2005


Batman relied on intelligence and skill, not supernatural powers.

And a buttload of money. Goddamn meritocracy. Excuse me while I write a letter to the Times.
posted by bibliowench at 11:13 AM on January 6, 2005


oops. Please insert "my ass" after "meritocracy."
posted by bibliowench at 11:14 AM on January 6, 2005


"Are you asking me if I have supernatural powers?"
posted by bonehead at 11:20 AM on January 6, 2005


This reminds me of the time in the summer of 2003 (movie release season, natch) when the CNN quickpoll was "Who would win in a fight: The Terminator or The Hulk?" (Answer, wisely shared by the masses: Hulk smash.)
posted by logovisual at 11:21 AM on January 6, 2005


So, Batman carries Kryptonite in his bat utility belt?
posted by caddis at 11:28 AM on January 6, 2005


Batman won, both in current and possible-future realms on continuity.

caddis: Yes, he does. Superman gave it to him in case he was ever mind-controlled and had to be put down.
posted by XQUZYPHYR at 11:34 AM on January 6, 2005


God, I'm ashamed of writing that instantly.
posted by XQUZYPHYR at 11:35 AM on January 6, 2005


I thought Batman swore never to kill anyone though... so I can't imagine him killing Superman with Kryptonite.
posted by banished at 11:42 AM on January 6, 2005


I am such a humongous, flaming superhero comics geek
posted by XQUZYPHYR at 2:34 PM EST on January 6


I kid because I love :D

Also, note that my use of the semi-derogative adjective 'flaming' is not in any way related to latent homophobia. Especially if AlexReynolds is around.
posted by cyrusdogstar at 11:42 AM on January 6, 2005


Wouldn't kryptonite in the utility belt give Batman cancer of the 'nads, like Luthor got in his hand from his kryptonite ring?

On preview: I never read comics, ever, and never will again.
posted by Sparx at 11:50 AM on January 6, 2005


Sparx: If you think Batman isn't wearing a lead cup, you're fooling yourself.
posted by logovisual at 12:06 PM on January 6, 2005


Wouldn't kryptonite in the utility belt give Batman cancer of the 'nads

Not if the kryptonite is in a protective lead casing.
posted by Arch Stanton at 12:06 PM on January 6, 2005


He's got it sealed in lead, while Luthor kept his out in the open. Bats doesn't want Superman to get sick everytime they show up at the JLA office parties together.
posted by robocop is bleeding at 12:11 PM on January 6, 2005


Batman's nads are too awesome to get cancer.

And if he ever did get cancer, he could beat it with enough prep time.
posted by XQUZYPHYR at 12:15 PM on January 6, 2005


Thanks for clearing that up, guys. I think we'll all sleep just a bit better knowing that the Batster's swimmers and wedding tackle are going to be just fine.
posted by Sparx at 12:15 PM on January 6, 2005


Someone was going to say this anyway, so...

Marge: There's someone here who wants to talk with you.
Homer (exitedly): Is it Batman?
Marge: No, it's a scientist.
Homer: Batman's a scientist.


I always knew that Simpsons dialogue wasn't really a joke.
posted by mowglisambo at 12:19 PM on January 6, 2005


Oh no! Will Eisner is dead!
posted by KS at 1:02 PM on January 6, 2005


If one is going to say that Batman could beat Superman in a fight because he can use kryptonite, then one might as well say that anyone on earth can beat Superman in a fight via the same means.
posted by rushmc at 1:13 PM on January 6, 2005


The Batman correction isn't the only funny one. Notice the Department of Mental Retardation correction near the top?
posted by The Thnikkaman at 1:15 PM on January 6, 2005


Will and Abe's Guide to Superheroes.
posted by Verdant at 1:16 PM on January 6, 2005


If one is going to say that Batman could beat Superman in a fight because he can use kryptonite, then one might as well say that anyone on earth can beat Superman in a fight via the same means.

Yes, but they wouldn't brood properly afterwards.
posted by Cyrano at 1:19 PM on January 6, 2005


If one is going to say that Batman could beat Superman in a fight because he can use kryptonite, then one might as well say that anyone on earth can beat Superman in a fight via the same means.

I don't know, you still need to have some agility and quickness.
posted by jefbla at 1:53 PM on January 6, 2005


Agility and quickness?

We'll just have Lance Armstrong chase Superman down with a kryptonite bike. That'll save Earth!
posted by spinifex23 at 2:17 PM on January 6, 2005


And Lance already beat the testicular cancer once! No lead casing needed!
posted by bDiddy at 2:24 PM on January 6, 2005


Metafilter: Could beat cancer (or Superman) with enough prep time.
posted by logovisual at 2:27 PM on January 6, 2005


Not likely, for a number of reasons:

1. We don't have the resources to get our own kryptonite.
2. We don't have the name recognition to successfully beat Superman.

Face it people, if anyone was going to beat Superman, kryptonite-style, it'd have to be someone big. Like, Lex Luthor big. And since Luthor can't do it, no villain will. However, Batman, being not a villain, can beat him down.

Also, Batman is awesome.
posted by graventy at 2:33 PM on January 6, 2005


Superman's powers aren't supernatural, they derive from the yellow sun of Earth, and the difference in gravity between Krypton and Earth!

Now Dr. Strange, his powers are supernatural.

If one is going to say that Batman could beat Superman in a fight because he can use kryptonite, then one might as well say that anyone on earth can beat Superman in a fight via the same means.


No way. In The Dark Knight Returns, it's trickiness, scientific genius, unparalleled strategery, and downright orneriness that defeated Superman. Ok, the Kryptonite helped, but who else could have pulled it off, I ask you? Nobody, that's who!

Now, to quote The Onion:
"When you are ready to have a serious conversation about Green Lantern, you have my e-mail address."
posted by Hildago at 3:33 PM on January 6, 2005


The film coming out this summer shows just HOW rich Bruce Wayne is. Like, way beyond Trump. (Geez, can you see Trump running around in that outfit?) It's true - that enormous wealth is the REAL superpower.
posted by humannature at 5:27 PM on January 6, 2005


KS: that was the first thing I thought of too :( *sad*
posted by yeoz at 7:43 PM on January 6, 2005


bDiddy wins.
posted by sdrawkcab at 7:48 PM on January 6, 2005


Yeah, but The Flash could beat both Batman and Superman in a footrace.

That said, George W. Bush could beat any of these guys in an election.

And that's kinda sad.
posted by Darkman at 10:09 PM on January 6, 2005


No way. In The Dark Knight Returns, it's trickiness, scientific genius, unparalleled strategery, and downright orneriness that defeated Superman. Ok, the Kryptonite helped, but who else could have pulled it off, I ask you? Nobody, that's who!

And because superman has been massively weakened by being at ground zero for a nuclear explosion and has only had limited access to sunlight due to the dust thrown up by it. Plus Batman has help.
posted by biffa at 1:43 AM on January 7, 2005


I bet Jean Loring could kill Superman.
posted by austinspace at 2:36 PM on January 7, 2005


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