Comments on: Outplay, outlast and what was that other one?

Outplay, outlast and what was that other one?

CunningLinguist — Tue, 18 Jan 2005 10:24:55 -0800

"Survivor" winner Richard Hatch didn't declare his million bucks to the IRS. He'll be arraigned Jan 24.

By: matteo

matteo — Tue, 18 Jan 2005 10:27:22 -0800

Coming soon: "Prison Survivor". CL, want to try to write down an outline and pitch it with me?

By: fenriq

fenriq — Tue, 18 Jan 2005 10:29:20 -0800

Good, I'm sure his predilection for dropping his drawers all the time will serve him quite nicely in the "pokey".

By: taursir

taursir — Tue, 18 Jan 2005 10:31:50 -0800

I hope he doesn't get raped by Martha.

By: soyjoy

soyjoy — Tue, 18 Jan 2005 10:36:42 -0800

"Awww, I don't hafta report that under-the-table money. I mean, come on - who's gonna know?"

By: JeffL

JeffL — Tue, 18 Jan 2005 10:39:33 -0800

What a dumbass. It's not like this was a low-profile sort of thing...

By: Devils Rancher

Devils Rancher — Tue, 18 Jan 2005 10:42:16 -0800

You can be a millionaire and not pay taxes. How? 1. Get a million dollars. 2. When the IRS asks you why you pay your taxes, use these two simple words-- "I forgot." -- Steve Martin.

By: Devils Rancher

Devils Rancher — Tue, 18 Jan 2005 10:43:28 -0800

argh. insert "didn't" between you and pay. More coffee, please.

By: caddis

caddis — Tue, 18 Jan 2005 10:46:03 -0800

Stupid people on a stupid show performing stupid acts for viewing by more stupid people - and we are amazed that this genius cheated on his taxes?

By: SweetJesus

SweetJesus — Tue, 18 Jan 2005 10:46:45 -0800

Hahah, that's fantastic. Richard Hatch side-story: I saw the dope over the summer when I was getting my oil changed at Jiffy Lube, in Newport Rhode Island. He was wearing very tight shorts, and complaining loudly about the price of air filters. Very surreal.

By: ZippityBuddha

ZippityBuddha — Tue, 18 Jan 2005 10:48:44 -0800

I bet this is all Baltar's doing.

By: xmutex

xmutex — Tue, 18 Jan 2005 10:48:46 -0800

caddis: Is it a burden to be as perfect and righteous as you?

By: NickDouglas

NickDouglas — Tue, 18 Jan 2005 10:52:37 -0800

Hatch also tried to deduct his dignity as a business loss.

By: stonerose

stonerose — Tue, 18 Jan 2005 10:53:07 -0800

Richard Hatch. Jiffy Lube. *stifles snort*

By: flarbuse

flarbuse — Tue, 18 Jan 2005 10:54:03 -0800

Society creates artificial celebrity. Society mocks artificial celebrity. Society does not mock itself for choosing artificial celebrity in first place. Society creates new artificial celebrity.

By: jonmc

jonmc — Tue, 18 Jan 2005 10:58:05 -0800

Society creates artificial celebrity. Society mocks artificial celebrity. Society does not mock itself for choosing artificial celebrity in first place. Society creates new artificial celebrity. Weblog poster chides society for celebrating artificial celebrity. Weblog poster implicity excludes self from society for purposes of post, delivering self-administered pat on back. Weblog poster is mocked by second Weblog poster.

By: RockCorpse

RockCorpse — Tue, 18 Jan 2005 11:07:35 -0800

I love it when you guys talk in headline-speak. It's very clever.

By: adnanbwp

adnanbwp — Tue, 18 Jan 2005 11:08:47 -0800

Weblog reader reads and says... "Only in America".

By: fenriq

fenriq — Tue, 18 Jan 2005 11:10:12 -0800

caddis, you may dislike the show but calling anyone who watches it stupid is pretty shortsighted and stupid. I watch it because I enjoy watching the interplay of personalities. SweetJesus, I have a most disagreeable image in my mind now about Richard Hatch and a Jiffy Lube. Thanks ever so much. "That's not where the air cleaner goes, but it's not a bad idea."

By: orange swan

orange swan — Tue, 18 Jan 2005 11:12:59 -0800

I can't get over how incredibly stupid this was of him.

By: arse_hat

arse_hat — Tue, 18 Jan 2005 11:28:33 -0800

Society creates artificial celebrity. Society mocks artificial celebrity. Society does not mock itself for choosing artificial celebrity in first place. Society creates new artificial celebrity. Weblog poster chides society for celebrating artificial celebrity. Weblog poster implicity excludes self from society for purposes of post, delivering self-administered pat on back. Weblog poster is mocked by second Weblog poster. Second Weblog poster mocks first Weblog poster. Third Weblog poster mocks Second Weblog poster for sinking so low as to waste time mocking a Weblog poster. *Circular logic causes Third Weblog poster's head to spin tighter and tighter until reaching singularity*

By: Four Flavors

Four Flavors — Tue, 18 Jan 2005 11:34:42 -0800

You'd think that since he was the only one that went into the show with a strategy that he'd have a strategy for dealing with the money once he won. Of course, that strategy may have been to duck taxes and pray/litigate for the best, but that sort of strategy would have gotten him kicked right off the island. Also, I always think of this link when I think of Mr. Hatch

By: chicobangs

chicobangs — Tue, 18 Jan 2005 11:39:55 -0800

What orange swan said. It never occurred to him that maybe it was a good idea to play above the table on a payout that was as public as this one? Obviously, he was no dummy. What was he thinking?

By: docpops

docpops — Tue, 18 Jan 2005 11:40:17 -0800

surprising that a morbidly obese, nude, and mildly sociopathic celebrity wouldn't fly right under the IRS' radar... *puts pants back on*

By: DBAPaul

DBAPaul — Tue, 18 Jan 2005 11:46:33 -0800

ZippityBuddha: Count Baltar I assume?

By: Doohickie

Doohickie — Tue, 18 Jan 2005 11:52:18 -0800

I'm with caddis. The show was stoopid. Hatch is stoopid. Anyone who watches the show is stoopid. Anyone who complains about the show is stoo-- Wait, can I start that again? I'm with caddis. Let's just leave it at that.

By: robocop is bleeding

robocop is bleeding — Tue, 18 Jan 2005 11:59:12 -0800

Four Flavors, thank you for posting that link. I've been trying to locate that site off and on for the past few weeks!

By: knave

knave — Tue, 18 Jan 2005 12:16:46 -0800

How come Michael Badnarik can openly profess to paying no income taxes and he doesn't get in trouble?

By: Four Flavors

Four Flavors — Tue, 18 Jan 2005 12:19:13 -0800

You're welcome. It took me 20 minutes of searching to find it. I finally got it with "donkey kong country game design banana", which is the oddest search string I think I've ever used. I wish he would write more- I enjoy his stuff.

By: LeLiLo

LeLiLo — Tue, 18 Jan 2005 12:27:48 -0800

Not to derail this thread (although what more is there to say except I can't get over how incredibly stupid this was of him?) — but as a non-Survivor watcher, I've always wondered how they kicked somebody off the island when there were only two people left. The viewers at home? It's surely not a question worthy of Ask MeFi, but might sneak by here, where the only other thing to say is "What an idiot."

By: fenriq

fenriq — Tue, 18 Jan 2005 12:31:10 -0800

lelilo, when they get down to 2 players, the last 7 people to get voted off are the jury and they decide who gets the million. Which means you can't piss off too many people in the last 9 or you're screwed.

By: Ynoxas

Ynoxas — Tue, 18 Jan 2005 13:29:13 -0800

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA Couldn't happen to a nicer fella. I think he was a jackass. I didn't watch the show but I couldn't avoid him on the post-show interview circuit. However, as much of a waste of oxygen processing he is, calling him "morbidly obese" is inaccurate. What kind of physician are you exactly docpops? Only a plastic surgeon would say something that absurd. I hope they take every damn dime and he has to serve a sentence. There is absolutely no way a judge would believe this to be an error or an oversight. This is not ignorance. This is fraud. And caddis is right, despite the hissing from the peanut gallery. People who watch reality shows deserve the tripe they get. I will watch cable access before I watch reality shows. With cable access there at least exists the POSSIBILITY I will be entertained. Or at least amused. All i can hope is that there is a Richard Hatch Lovers forum somewhere where all the posters are wallowing in their collective sorrow. Also, can't someone give this Richard Hatch a million dollars?

By: SweetJesus

SweetJesus — Tue, 18 Jan 2005 13:54:21 -0800

Yonxas: I saw him over the summer, he's pretty tubby now. Not obese, but back to Survivor weight for sure.

By: flarbuse

flarbuse — Tue, 18 Jan 2005 13:59:41 -0800

First weblog poster is amused by second webolg poster's mocking. However, first weblog poster does not own a television and feels comfortable excluding self from society anyway. First weblog poster become aroused from repetetion of self-administered patting.

By: 235w103

235w103 — Tue, 18 Jan 2005 14:12:02 -0800

Jesus, that's brilliant. Did he think nobody would notice? That makes me so happy. It's akin to if Bill Gates just didn't file one year. When you recieve a lot of money, be sure the government is going to notice.

By: fenriq

fenriq — Tue, 18 Jan 2005 14:53:01 -0800

Ynoxas, so what you're saying is that a show you didn't watch that happens to be reality is tripe because its not entertaining at all? There's no chance that a reality show could evoke even the tiniest glimmer of a smile and amuse you? Damn, you must be one of the world's best poker players. I have laughed out loud at Survivor many, many times. Are you going to now say that I'm an idiot because I can enjoy something you find so repulsively distasteful? Without ever having bothered to take a look at what you are so easily dismissive of? That's almost as dumb as Hatch thinking no one would notice him not paying taxes on his winnings. Almost.

By: tomplus2

tomplus2 — Tue, 18 Jan 2005 15:01:57 -0800

You know, Hatch, that the IRS often just ignores the 1099-MISC forms, especially when they say "$1,010,000" on them. ...can't stand the man.

By: salad spork

salad spork — Tue, 18 Jan 2005 15:45:58 -0800

surprising that a morbidly obese, nude, and mildly sociopathic celebrity wouldn't fly right under the IRS' radar... your definition of morbidly obese is a little off. richard hatch may be chubby, but he can still walk, which i think excludes him from "morbidly obese".

By: selfmedicating

selfmedicating — Tue, 18 Jan 2005 15:54:53 -0800

I bow before Richard Hatch's ability to keep himself in the spotlight. Anyone else see him on Dr. Phil a while back talking about how to protect his son from an internet pedophile? No, I am not capable of making this up.

By: amberglow

amberglow — Tue, 18 Jan 2005 15:57:15 -0800

Doesn't the IRS take the money off the top right away when it's won on TV? I thought gameshow winners always have to fill out forms at the show itself when they win?

By: Jim Jones

Jim Jones — Tue, 18 Jan 2005 16:26:49 -0800

Am I the last person on earth to find out Richard Hatch was Apollo from Battlestar Gallactica? He just doesn't look anything like Apollo to me.

By: arse_hat

arse_hat — Tue, 18 Jan 2005 16:33:28 -0800

amberglow The IRS gets 25% of any prize over $5K. But that does not mean you are done. You still need to file in any year you have income. You may get some back or have to pay more just like on your payroll taxes.

By: amberglow

amberglow — Tue, 18 Jan 2005 16:37:30 -0800

ahhh--thanks arse.

By: guruguy9

guruguy9 — Tue, 18 Jan 2005 16:47:31 -0800

It's awesome, with posts like these I no longer have to visit Fark!

By: yerfatma

yerfatma — Tue, 18 Jan 2005 16:52:15 -0800

Anyone else see him on Dr. Phil a while back talking about how to protect his son from an internet pedophile? Missed that. Did they talk about how he beat a child abuse rap on the show? SweetJesus, have you seen his house? It's like a giant camp stuck into the side of the hill near Green End Ave. Why not spend some of the untaxed money on new property and then build a less ostentatious pad?

By: geekyguy

geekyguy — Tue, 18 Jan 2005 18:41:36 -0800

I had the same question as amberglow and would then even go further to suggest that maybe he is angling to get his tax obligation reduced since we have all heard how you can pay pennies on the dollar! Perhaps he walks a way with a lower tax obligation than he would have had he filed.

By: arse_hat

arse_hat — Tue, 18 Jan 2005 18:59:45 -0800

Yeah sure. pennies. I'll bet no one at the IRS would like to make an example of this dude. ;-)

By: docpops

docpops — Tue, 18 Jan 2005 19:56:04 -0800

Morbidly obese is defined by bariatric medicine as 100 pounds over ideal body weight. When the show aired, no question, he qualified. As a society we have become so fat that he starts to blend in, sadly.

By: Ynoxas

Ynoxas — Tue, 18 Jan 2005 20:53:17 -0800

fenriq: reread. I never said you were an idiot. I said if you watch reality shows you deserve the low quality of entertainment you get. I don't claim any kind of moral high-ground on TV viewing. My favorite shows are usually either on Comedy Central or animated, so based on that I don't get to be an elitist. I sometimes watch CSI:Miami because I love watching David Caruso chew on the scenery. At this point in the reality game, everyone knows what is to be expected by every title. Reality TV is already over, it's already jumped the shark. I lost faith in Reality TV after I was totally hooked on the first season of "Real World" way back when on MTV. Then I found out it was staged, with the producers suggesting "talking points" and artificially creating dramatic situations. The networks know what most of us suspect: that "real life" is pretty damn boring and uneventful most of the time, and makes pretty shitty television. Add in the multiple reports that the current crop of "reality tv" is anything but and is heavily scripted, and there is no entertainment value there to be had. Hell, even the insurance underwriters get into the game to make sure everything is safe and nothing unexpected can happen. What you are watching is a pretend, scripted tv show about what a reality show might be like. You're not an idiot. You're just making poor entertainment choices... in my opinion, of course. And your viewing contributes to their continuation. Some guy making millions of dollars per year is helping decide that this is all you need, because obviously you're watching it. My hope is that someone gets badly maimed or killed on one of these so they all close shop and disappear overnight. As the above article alludes, the entire industry is one good lawsuit away from evaporation. An attempted rape on "Big Brother" or an attempted murder on "Survivor" would pretty much make reality tv a distant memory.

By: humannature

humannature — Tue, 18 Jan 2005 21:35:38 -0800

I love the ""Prison Survivor" idea! If CBS reads this blog... Quick, matteo! To the copyright office!

By: thedailygrowl

thedailygrowl — Tue, 18 Jan 2005 21:47:03 -0800

Down in Hollywood Richard busily pitching his new reality show idea called I.R.S. Audit Survivor.

By: Doohickie

Doohickie — Wed, 19 Jan 2005 08:01:08 -0800

About the only show out there I consider to be true "Reality TV" is Cops. I watched it several times and got a kick out of dumbass petty criminals getting arrested. But after a while, it gets routine and the fascination wears off.

By: chicobangs

chicobangs — Wed, 19 Jan 2005 09:46:26 -0800

Or "My Big Fat Obnoxious Reality Show Tax Cheat!"

By: CunningLinguist

CunningLinguist — Thu, 20 Jan 2005 05:17:55 -0800

Chico wins.