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• Things which we will rock:
- you

Songs in list form:
- the best thing ever to come from LiveJournal
- Amazingly addictive
- via
posted by me3dia (86 comments total) 2 users marked this as a favorite

my contribution
posted by Pretty_Generic at 2:45 PM on March 28, 2005

• Things that have somehow gotten old the very second I heard of them:
- this
posted by sonofsamiam at 2:47 PM on March 28, 2005

posted by Pretty_Generic at 3:04 PM on March 28, 2005

Happy birthday to: posted by NickDouglas at 3:09 PM on March 28, 2005

if anyone cares - to avoid those extra blank lines, write everything on a "single" line (let the text wrap automatically in the box without hitting "return") and close list items explicitly (with </li>) to separate individual entries. quonsar will explain why this happens.
posted by andrew cooke at 3:10 PM on March 28, 2005

posted by Mean Mr. Bucket at 3:19 PM on March 28, 2005

posted by Capn at 3:23 PM on March 28, 2005

Okay, here goes nothing:

To everything:There is a season:And a time for:A time to:To everything:There is a season:And a time for:A time to:To everything:There is a season:And a time for:A time:To everything:There is a season:And a time for:A time:posted by Down10 at 3:36 PM on March 28, 2005

(I guess I could have pared that down a little)
posted by Down10 at 3:36 PM on March 28, 2005

things I am tired of:


things I can't be making come true:

posted by clockzero at 3:39 PM on March 28, 2005

posted by Down10 at 3:44 PM on March 28, 2005

Does anyone really:
- know what day it is?
- care?
posted by FYKshun at 3:45 PM on March 28, 2005

The thing about bullet-pointed lists is, you really don't need to repeat the point. So all those us-es are redundant. As are those turns.
posted by graventy at 3:47 PM on March 28, 2005

posted by knave at 3:48 PM on March 28, 2005

Down10: Dinosaur Comics = Best. Webcomic. EVAR.
posted by solotoro at 3:49 PM on March 28, 2005

I like how REM songs are curiously resistant to this. Makes me like them all the more.
posted by ontic at 3:50 PM on March 28, 2005

For that song you heard in the rave:



posted by BlackLeotardFront at 4:03 PM on March 28, 2005

posted by dj_fraudulent at 4:03 PM on March 28, 2005

I think these are much funnier when imagined as real business powerpoint slides.

Like say, "I've got you babe" by Sonny and Cher would have a few like this: posted by mathowie at 4:05 PM on March 28, 2005

In my imagination
- There is no complication
- I dream about you all the time

In my mind
- a celebration
- The sweetest of sensation
- Thinking you could be mine

In my imagination (2)
- There is no hesitation
- We walk together hand in hand

I'm dreaming
- You fell in love with me
- Like I'm in love with you
- But dreaming's all I do
- - - If only they'd come true

I should
- be so lucky
- Lucky
- lucky
- lucky

I should
- be so lucky in love

I should
- be so lucky
- Lucky
- lucky
- lucky

I should
- be so lucky in love
posted by seanyboy at 4:10 PM on March 28, 2005

I'm with sonofsamiam.

They are funny, when people who are good at being funny write them.

But this ... well, this is humour by committee.
posted by blacklite at 4:15 PM on March 28, 2005

Very good years:posted by DevilsAdvocate at 4:27 PM on March 28, 2005

Oh, and offensive mango did it first in the LJ thread, but I independently thought up:

Things I would do for loveThings I won't do for loveposted by DevilsAdvocate at 4:31 PM on March 28, 2005

Scenarios to imagine:Why you should not have left me standing:Theories as to why you've left me standing:Theories as to why we scream at each other:Qualities of doves:posted by furiousthought at 4:32 PM on March 28, 2005

Things we saw at twilight:

Things we saw at night:

posted by Mr.Encyclopedia at 4:34 PM on March 28, 2005

Oh wait, that one's already a list. I'll shut up now.
posted by DevilsAdvocate at 4:35 PM on March 28, 2005

Annoyances in this thread:
posted by fire&wings at 4:35 PM on March 28, 2005

You were wrong when you said You were right when you said
posted by psmealey at 4:38 PM on March 28, 2005

Au contraire, ontic! posted by Fourmyle at 4:39 PM on March 28, 2005

posted by knave at 4:51 PM on March 28, 2005

I'd list out the 50 ways to leave your lover, but I'm just too tired.
posted by WolfDaddy at 4:54 PM on March 28, 2005

1844:James K. Polk:I can't believe I did the whole song.
posted by Zonker at 4:57 PM on March 28, 2005 [1 favorite]

Argh! I was going to post this when I got home. Good post. VERY funny.
posted by absalom at 4:57 PM on March 28, 2005

Why don't we do it in the:
- Road

Who will be watching us:
- No one
posted by ORthey at 4:59 PM on March 28, 2005

And left out the independent treasury, after all that.
posted by Zonker at 5:04 PM on March 28, 2005

posted by Wolfdog at 5:07 PM on March 28, 2005

Bottles of beer on the wall:
- 99

Bottles of beer on the wall after you take one down and pass it around:
- 98
- 97
- 96
- 95
- 94
- 93
- 92
- 91...
posted by ori at 5:17 PM on March 28, 2005

This needs some Ramones.

What you are:
. a loudmouth

What you'd better do:
. shut it up.

What I'm going to do:
. beat you up

Why I'm going to do it:
. because you're a loudmouth
posted by Decani at 5:22 PM on March 28, 2005

it starts with:
-an earthquake

lenny bruce:
-not afraid

-of a hurricane

-to yourself churn

serving own needs:

speed it up:
-a notch


it's the end of the world:
-as we know it
-i feel fine
posted by mawlymawnster at 5:52 PM on March 28, 2005

I think making these into powerpoint decks is the next logical step.
posted by mathowie at 6:08 PM on March 28, 2005

posted by sellout at 6:17 PM on March 28, 2005

It starts with:Lenny Bruce:You:Things to do:Things not to do:Things to offer me:What it is:How I feel about that:Estimated Time of Departure:Random words and phrases that don’t mean shit: On Preview: Damn! mawlymawnster beat me to it!
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 6:22 PM on March 28, 2005

Heheh. posted by kryptondog at 6:46 PM on March 28, 2005

My (imperfectly formatted, slightly erroneous) contribution.
posted by LinusMines at 6:47 PM on March 28, 2005

Our Answer, and equally addictive
posted by moooshy at 7:03 PM on March 28, 2005

If I had a Million Dollars, I would buy you: If I had a million dollars, we wouldn't have to: If I had a million dollars, I would:
posted by Quartermass at 7:10 PM on March 28, 2005

When will they stone you?Was prior notice given of stoning?What subsequent communication took place?Summary & Conclusion:
Would I feel all alone?Who must get stoned?posted by dhartung at 7:16 PM on March 28, 2005

One of the better entries from the LJ thread: I've spoken so long, apparently the Rose is no longer available
posted by DevilsAdvocate at 7:43 PM on March 28, 2005

dhartung wins.
posted by Quartermass at 8:20 PM on March 28, 2005

Who You may wish for If so, you must Sponge Squareposted by swift at 8:31 PM on March 28, 2005

Who built this Starbucks?
  • We

  • posted by horsewithnoname at 8:44 PM on March 28, 2005

    Lady On wall She wants In tree by brook Sometimes I have a feeling when Seen in thoughts Things whispered: These things make me Bustle in hedgerow Road Things you may or may not know in connection with humming head: As we wind down road
    posted by swift at 9:08 PM on March 28, 2005

    Things I am:
      •The son
      •the heir, of
        •a shyness
          •criminally vulgar
        •nothing in particular
      •going about things the wrong way [alleged]
      •needing love [allegedly not unique in this regard]
      •[in the state of having] waited too long
      •without hope [gone]
      •not understanding you when you say it is going to happen 'now'

    Things you say:
      •"it's going to happen now"
      •"would you like to go?" [see below]

    What there is:
      •a club

    Things that could potentially happen if you go to said club:
      •could meet somebody
        •really loves you

    Things that do happen when you go to said club:
      •you stand on your own
      •you leave on your own
      •you go home
      •you cry
      •you want to die
    posted by al_fresco at 9:15 PM on March 28, 2005

    Start all over again....
    posted by eyeballkid at 9:19 PM on March 28, 2005

    Things you are:

    - The Colosseum
    - The Louvre Museum
    - A melody from a symphony by Strauss
    - A Bendel bonnet
    - A Shakespeare sonnet
    - Mickey Mouse
    - The Nile
    - The Tower of Pisa
    - The smile on the Mona Lisa
    - Mahatma Gandi
    - Napolean brandy
    - The purple light of a summer night in Spain
    - The National Gallery
    - Garbo's salary
    - Cellophane
    - Sublime
    - A turkey dinner
    - The time of the Derby winner
    - An Arrow collar
    - A Coolidge dollar
    - The nimble tread of the feet of Fred Astaire
    - An O'Neill drama
    - Whistler's mama
    - Camembert
    - A rose
    - Inferno's Dante
    - The nost on the great Durante
    - An old dutch master
    - Lady Astor
    - Pepsodent
    - Romance
    - The steppes of Russia
    - The pants on a Roxy usher

    Things I am:
    - A worthless check
    - A total wreck
    - A flop
    - A toy balloon that's fated soon to pop
    - The bottom

    Things you are:

    - The top
    posted by CunningLinguist at 9:31 PM on March 28, 2005 [1 favorite]

    Situation:Action Plan:posted by furiousthought at 10:12 PM on March 28, 2005 [1 favorite]

    Guest list for my lab party:

    - Monster (slab really needs cleaning before guests arrive)
    - Ghouls
    - Zombies (the fun-loving ones)
    - Wolfman
    - Dracula
    - Dracula's son
    - Igor
    - Igor's baying hounds
    - The Coffin Bangers (confirm gig)
    - Cryptkicker 5 (vocal group)
    - You

    (Don't forget to buy more Febreze!)
    posted by darkstar at 10:30 PM on March 28, 2005

    I can:
    -do the Frug
    -do the Robocop
    -do the Freddie
    -hate your girl
    -tell you that she's real pretty
    -take my clothes off
    -watch tv
    -shuffle off to Buffalo
    -a back bend
    -start a book
    -make some mac 'n cheese
    -sleep twelve hours

    I cannot:
    -do the Smurf
    -fall in love

    I will not:
    -call you back

    I will never:
    -fall in love

    You will never:
    -see my eyes

    Others will verify that I cannot:
    -do the Smurf
    posted by JT at 11:20 PM on March 28, 2005

    Who We Are:
    - whoever we are, wherever we're from
    - we should've noticed by now our behavior is dumb

    Areas To Improve:
    - it's going to take a lot more than trying to remove
    - the other race or the other whatever
    - from the face of the planet altogether

    Materials Needed:
    - A french bomb to poof them out of existence
    - Leave their real estate just where we need it

    - God made us out to be just like him
    - If we are dumb
    - Then god is dumb
    - and maybe a little ugly n the side

    (yeah, wordy I know. I need practice)
    posted by KevinSkomsvold at 11:44 PM on March 28, 2005

    Things I am
  • on a roll
  • your superhero

  • What we are
  • standing on the edge

  • Called for me by name
  • the head of state
  • --don't have time for him

  • Killed me with love
  • Sarah

  • Places I am pulled out of
  • the aircrash
  • the lake

  • Results (feelings)
  • my luck could change

  • Results (prediction)
  • Day
  • --will be glorious

  • posted by jokeefe at 1:11 AM on March 29, 2005

    People who will make you jump
  • Mac Daddy
  • Daddy Mac
  • Kriss Kross

  • posted by mr.marx at 1:36 AM on March 29, 2005

    Things That Are Ironic (but not really)posted by ayukna at 3:21 AM on March 29, 2005

    Life :
    - Is bigger than you.

    You :
    - Are not me.

    I :
    - Said too much.
    - Set it up.
    - Haven't said enough.

    In the corner :
    - Me.

    In the spotlight :
    - Me. Losing my religion.

    Things I don't know if I can do :
    - Keep up with you.

    I thought :
    - That I heard you laughing.
    - That I heard you sing.
    - That I saw you try.

    Every waking hour I am :
    - Choosing my confessions.
    - Trying to keep an eye on you.

    Consider :
    - This.
    - Hint of the century.
    - Slip that brought my knees.

    What if? :
    - These fantasies come flailing around.

    That was :
    - Just a dream.
    posted by grapefruitmoon at 5:38 AM on March 29, 2005

    It's funnier if you keep the list short and sort of summarize the main points. This one is hilarious, for example. It's not so funny when you just list every word of the freaking song in an outline format.

    I'm too lazy to search, but I bet McSweeny's started this.
    posted by Mid at 6:05 AM on March 29, 2005

    I never thought it would be so easy to:

    - Cleanse any song of passion or emotion in one fell swoop
    - Become annoying even faster than the Crazy Frog Ringtone

    [make it stop]
    posted by LondonYank at 6:09 AM on March 29, 2005

    Mental State of Frog:
    - Crazy.

    Pastimes of Frog:
    - Ringtone
    posted by Mid at 6:37 AM on March 29, 2005

    dhartung wins.

    Only if you didn't go to the second page on the main link. I think the original one on there is a better working-out of it. But dhartung certainly wins for picking the song that this works best with.
    posted by soyjoy at 7:22 AM on March 29, 2005

    (Following Mid's advice)

    Cities to which I invited her:Her responses (respectively):posted by DevilsAdvocate at 7:28 AM on March 29, 2005

    posted by serafinapekkala at 8:38 AM on March 29, 2005

    Assets of Mickey:
  • So pretty

  • So fine

  • Actions of Mickey:
  • Blows mind

  • Stays around all night

  • Thinks he's got the right

  • Means he won't when he says he will

  • Gives the chills

  • Still leaves girlfriend all alone every night

  • Takes girlfriend by the heart when he takes her by the hand

  • Lets a little more show every time he moves

  • Requests for Mickey:
  • Say goodnight

  • Take girlfriend home

  • Understand that it's guys like him

  • Don't break girlfriend's heart

  • Give it to girlfriend any way he can

  • Don't leave girlfriend in this jam

  • Don't say no

  • Additional comments
  • What a pity!

  • posted by SisterHavana at 9:00 AM on March 29, 2005

    Where I slipped
  • away

  • on a little white lie

  • What we've got
  • heads on sticks

  • What you've got
  • ventriloquists

  • standing in the shadows at the end of my bed

  • What follow me out of town
  • rats

  • children

  • posted by Saellys at 9:19 AM on March 29, 2005

    posted by kirkaracha at 10:03 AM on March 29, 2005

    We're not nearly as funny as the livejournal people.
    posted by Mid at 10:11 AM on March 29, 2005

    Things which I can't fully appreciate:
    - A thousand cable channels (nothing on)
    - My high speed connection (monitored daily by the Pentagon)
    - My dreams

    Things that I am lacking:
    - Peace
    - Friends
    - Sense
    - Guide
    - Time
    - An option
    - A care in the world
    - Shade
    - Light
    - Way
    - Sign
    - Grace

    To do:
    - Construct a sound defense
    - Overcome this grim reality
    - Patch all the cracks in the wall (delegated to mother)
    - Conceal myself
    - Steal myself
    - Break away

    (The Defense, by Bad Religion)
    posted by CrunchyFrog at 10:39 AM on March 29, 2005

    I will use this opportunity to illustrate why I don't like Ben Harper.

    What oppression does:
    - preys on us when we sleep
    - chases after:
    . - the tired
    . - the poor
    . - the weak
    - knows it means only harm
    - reaches out with its long arm
    - won't be let near Ben Harper
    - shall learn to fear Ben Harper
    - seeks population control
    - to divide and conquer is its goal

    Who I always have to steal my kisses from:
    - you
    - you
    - you
    - you

    - Ben harper don't want that kind of it in his life anymore
    - always seems to be around when it begins
    - never seems to be around when it ends
    - people spend so much time every day giving it away
    - Ben Harper won't let his roam
    So give Ben Harper your:
    - forever (not a day less will do)

    Excuse me, Mister,
    - do you have the time? Or are you so important that it stands still?
    - won't you lend me your ears? Or are you not only blind but do you not hear?
    - but isn't that you're oil in the sea? And the pollution in the air, whose could that be?
    posted by ORthey at 10:52 AM on March 29, 2005

    This is so bloody fun I have to go again. Forgive me.

    Things you never knew:
    - love
    -- until you crossed the line of grace
    - how low you'd stoop to make that call
    - what was on the ground
    -- until they made you crawl
    - that the heaven you keep you stole

    Things you never felt:
    - wanted
    -- until you had someone slap your face
    - alive
    -- until you'd almost wasted away

    - had to win
    - couldn't just pass
    - [were] the smartest ass at the top of the class

    You had:
    - flying colors
    - family tree
    - lessons in history
    - Catholic blues
    - convent shoes
    - stick-on tattoos
    --now making the news
    - holy war
    - northern star
    - Sermon on the Mount from the boot of your car

    - get up off your knees
    - leave me out of this mess

    Love is:
    - hard
    - tough
    - not what you're thinking of
    - big
    -- bigger than us

    - streets capsizing
    - spilling over down the drain
    - shards of glass
    - splinters like rain
    - you could only feel your own pain

    - talk getting nowhere

    November, December:
    - remember
    - we just started again

    It's what lovers:
    - steal
    - deal

    Why I found it hard to receive:
    - 'cause you, my love, I could never believe
    posted by Saellys at 11:43 AM on March 29, 2005

    • Places in which it is hot:
    - Herre

    • Solutions:
    - Take off clothes

    • Things I was like:
    - Good gracious ass bodacious
    - Flirtacious,
    - Tryin to show faces

    • Things I'm looking for:
    - The right time to shoot my steam (you know)
    - The right time to flash them G's

    • Next steps:
    - I'm leavin, please believin
        - Me and the rest of my heathens

    • Where I've got it (confirmed):
    - Locked at the top of the four seasons
        - Penthouse
        - Roof top
        - Birds (fed by me)

    • Actionables:
    - What I need you to do:
        - To get up up on the dance floor
        - Give that man what he's asking for
    - Reasons:
        - I feel like bustin loose
        - I feel like touching you
        - Nobody can stop the juice
            - Whats the use?

    • Life's important questions:
    - Why you at the bar if you aint poppin the bottles?
    - What good is all the fame if you aint fuckin the models?

    • Comparison (You vs. Me):
    - You:
        - Driving a sportscar
            - Not fast
    - Me:
        - Down (also driving a sportscar)
            - 100MPH
            - Top down, wearing goggles

    • Directions to Herre:
    - Get off the freeway
        - Exit 106
        - Park

    • Items referenced once Herre:
    - Ash tray
    - Flip gate
    - Gucci collar for dollar

    • I:
    - Spit game
    - Can't talk it

    • I am:
    - Warm
    - Sweating

    • You are:
    - Still wearing a VOKAL tanktop
    - With a winner

    • Actionables (2):
    - Take it off like your home alone
    - Dance in front your mirror while you're on the phone
        - As if checking your reflection
        - While talking your best friend

    • Nelly:
    - Hang all out
    - Just fall out

    • Ingredients:
    - ah
    - ah

    1. Mix a little bit a ah, ah with a little bit a ah, ah
    2. Give a little bit a ah, ah with a little bit a ah, ah
    3. Add more ah, ah
    4. Add additional sprinkle a that ah, ah
    5. Make it (with ah, ah)

    • Stop:
    - Placin'
    - Time wastin'

    • What I've got:
    - I gotta a friend with a pole in the basement
        - Pole available if you'll use it.

    • News:
    - Nelly took a trip from the Luna to Neptunes
        - Came back with somethin' thicker than fittin' in sasoons
        - Says she likes to think about cuttin' in restrooms
    posted by me3dia at 12:39 PM on March 29, 2005

    Her Majesty:
    - A pretty nice girl
    - Doesn't have a lot to say
    - A pretty nice girl
    - Changes from day to day

    I want to tell her:
    - I love her a lot

    But I gotta get a belly full of:
    - wine

    Her Majesty:
    - a pretty nice girl
    - someday I'm gonna make her mine
    posted by ORthey at 3:22 PM on March 29, 2005

    It's spawned a LiveJournal community.
    posted by Dreama at 4:01 PM on March 29, 2005

    Action plan for violence in Brixton.
    posted by Mayor Curley at 4:41 PM on March 29, 2005

    For ontic, the non-believer, an REM song:

    Things I did with my hat: Things we are: Where to take this joy:posted by tim451 at 8:27 AM on March 30, 2005

    Oh, and:

    Things I wish for myself: posted by tim451 at 8:34 AM on March 30, 2005

    Wow. Some of these are really awful. Here's a hint:

    This is slightly clever:

    things we will rock:
  • you

  • This is sad and annoying:

    we will:
  • rock you

  • posted by dreish at 12:51 PM on March 30, 2005

    Things which I have:
    -Your Picture
    Things that I want but do not have:
    -A doctor to take your picture
    -So that I may look at you from inside as well
    Things of which I have none (presently):
    -Wonder it's dark
    Ways in which you have me turning:
    posted by klangklangston at 6:16 AM on March 31, 2005

    Places I have been:

    - Georgia
    - California
    - Anywhere I could run
    - Nice
    - the Isle of Greece
    - Monte Carlo
    - Paradise

    Places I have not been:

    - Me
    posted by the_bone at 8:02 AM on April 6, 2005

    I am:

    - not much of a man by the night of day
    - by night, one hell of a lover
    - making a man, with blonde hair and a tan
    - filled with tension, which the aforementioned man will be good for relieving.
    - seeing you shiver with antici...
    - pation.
    - removing the cause, but not the symptom
    - a sweet transvestite
    - from Transsexual, Transylvania
    posted by the_bone at 7:43 AM on April 14, 2005

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