Comments on: The following synopsis and suggestions will help you make the grades you obviously deserve.

The following synopsis and suggestions will help you make the grades you obviously deserve.

grabbingsand — Thu, 07 Apr 2005 07:16:06 -0800

Your Homework Done For Free! Don't have time to finish that Tolkein book report? Leave your worrying to the experts at rec.arts.books.tolkein.

First they are attacked by evil Orcs in the woods; next they are driven into the dark forest of Lothlorien, where they are imprisoned by the beautiful but evil Queen Beruthiel. They make their escape when Beruthiel's good sister, Galadriel, frees them from their prison-cell and floats them down the river in barrels ... however, they face a terrifying setback when they are found by the evil wizard Radagast. Gandalf sacrifices his life to destroy Radagast the Balrog, and the others escape the mountains while the battle rages.

(via Making Light)

By: boymilo

boymilo — Thu, 07 Apr 2005 07:35:04 -0800

Why read the books? I hear they made movies out of 'em!

By: Tuwa

Tuwa — Thu, 07 Apr 2005 07:39:13 -0800

In my day, I read the Clif's Notes. (Well, only for Nathaniel Hawthorne, who bored the hell out of me even in summary.) That said, these summaries are hilarious.

By: caution live frogs

caution live frogs — Thu, 07 Apr 2005 08:00:29 -0800

I'm of the opinion that if some sections had been a touch more circumspect, this could have actually fooled someone. I'm thinking that it would be a fool indeed who would believe this enough to base a report on it, given the obviously sarcastic bits like "inexplicably they have no racetrack" and such. Remove these (admittedly few) bits and I'm sure some poor sap with little time to read but ample time to Google would fall for it. Then again I know these books well enough that it might only seem obvious to me, and not to a person who hasn't plowed their way through the entire story, the Hobbit, and the Silmarilion as well. I did laugh at this though.

By: jmccw

jmccw — Thu, 07 Apr 2005 08:11:10 -0800

perhaps jruckman should check this out...

By: jmccw

jmccw — Thu, 07 Apr 2005 08:13:11 -0800

perhaps jruckman should check this out... err... re: the 'do my homework' part

By: Plutor

Plutor — Thu, 07 Apr 2005 08:15:32 -0800

caution live frogs: "Then again I know these books well enough that it might only seem obvious to me, and not to a person who hasn't plowed their way throughthe entire story, the Hobbit, and the Silmarilion as well." I started reading, and in the first sentence, I thought "What?!? Twentieth birthday party?!? That's not accurate" and considered writing an email to the author.. before I read on and understood. Correcting people is too automatic for Tolkienites, I think.

By: davelog

davelog — Thu, 07 Apr 2005 08:33:15 -0800

Have we learned nothing from Laura K. Pahl?

By: QuietDesperation

QuietDesperation — Thu, 07 Apr 2005 08:34:42 -0800

I agree, Caution. They missed an opportunity to expose students who crib from the Web rather than read their school material. Teachers could look for the telltale discrepancies and .... busted!

By: uncleozzy

uncleozzy — Thu, 07 Apr 2005 08:53:29 -0800

Do teachers actually assign Lord of the Rings to students? Sounds pretty cruel to me, and you can be sure that I'd turn to my old buddy Cliff for assistance. I love to read, but Tolkein is just an unbearable snoozefest for me. That said, anyone who falls for this deserves what he gets.

By: davy

davy — Thu, 07 Apr 2005 09:01:39 -0800

Tolkein is just an unbearable snoozefest for me. Same here. Though I think I did manage to finish The Hobbit in 1975; there wasn't much else to read in the juvie lockup. (When I went back in '78 they had something by Harold Robbins -- with "good parts"!)

By: caddis

caddis — Thu, 07 Apr 2005 09:13:33 -0800

Nate?

By: Photar

Photar — Thu, 07 Apr 2005 09:31:23 -0800

I remember reading a funny fake synopsis of the lord of the rings then I read a news article that said something like, "any one who has read the books knows, Galadryel is the evil witch queen." I nearly died.

By: russilwvong

russilwvong — Thu, 07 Apr 2005 09:39:17 -0800

"I'm of the opinion that if some sections had been a touch more circumspect, this could have actually fooled someone." Apparently it fooled Ian Markham-Smith, writing in the Sunday Times: "For the uninitiated, Galadriel is the good sister of the evil but beautiful Queen Beruthiel, who imprisons the Fellowship of the Ring in the forest of Lothlorien. In the book, Galadriel frees them from her sister's clutches."

By: Dantien

Dantien — Thu, 07 Apr 2005 11:05:32 -0800

Hysterical. For those of you who are fans of the Silmarillion, I did post on my own site (warning: self link) the abridged version.

By: dirtynumbangelboy

dirtynumbangelboy — Thu, 07 Apr 2005 13:18:36 -0800

Oh. My. God. I have never laughed so hard, Dantien. Thanks!

By: YAMWAK

YAMWAK — Thu, 07 Apr 2005 14:19:49 -0800

Dantien - brilliant! Now I'm going to have to dig up the book and read it again. Drat! :-) Cheers

By: UKnowForKids

UKnowForKids — Thu, 07 Apr 2005 14:48:52 -0800

coughdoublepostcough

By: Baby_Balrog

Baby_Balrog — Thu, 07 Apr 2005 17:30:44 -0800

Destroy what who where?

By: grabbingsand

grabbingsand — Thu, 07 Apr 2005 19:22:42 -0800

Damn. Two year old doublepost. And yes, the MeFi URL search came up empty.