The Ultimate "Sith" Spolier!

April 18, 2005 3:10 PM

The ultimate spoiler! Download the complete, illustrated screenplay for "Star Wars: Episode III Revenge of the Sith" here for $4.99. completely legal.
posted by JPowers (28 comments total)

So, before this turns into FanBoy land, let me throw this out.

The other night, I was showing my wife the trailer and she gets all huffy and asks, "I thought that guy [Anakin] was a good guy in the other two movies. Why are they all of a sudden making him a bad guy?"

If we hadn't recently had a child together, I would have filed for an annulment.
posted by ColdChef at 3:23 PM on April 18, 2005

You should divorce her and get the custody. That's no kind of environment to be raising a child in.
posted by sonofsamiam at 3:26 PM on April 18, 2005

one hopes it doesn't end up in the P2P networks, God forbid
posted by matteo at 3:31 PM on April 18, 2005

I would side with her. Forcing an adult to watch an ad for a Star Wars movie is cruel. And that room full of Star Wars "investment quality collectables"... its a wonder she puts up with you.
posted by R. Mutt at 3:32 PM on April 18, 2005

Wait now, there's a screenplay for the Star Wars prequels?

WHAAAAA?
posted by newfers at 4:51 PM on April 18, 2005

Kee-ryst--now I know it's going to suck. Lucas is so desperate to recoup his losses at the box office, he's selling the script before it's posted on the web.

In other news, Lucasfilm reps were quoted on CNN as saying it's a "tear-jerker" and described it as "Titanic in space."

That's right, Titanic in space. I'm sure they meant Titanic the movie, but it's gonna be Titanic the real-life ship. Oh, the irony.

It'll be a tear-jerker, all right--particularly for the kids who realize they've waited 28 years to pay good money for 120 minutes of digital wizardry interspersed with horrid dialogue, plot holes, bad acting, and Natalie Portman indulging George Lucas' fetish for ostentatious hairdos.
posted by fandango_matt at 4:58 PM on April 18, 2005

Side Question: Are there any conspiracy theories involving R2D2? That little robot manages to be a part of every major incident for five movies straight (and I assume the sixth)
posted by vacapinta at 4:59 PM on April 18, 2005

Another link to the "Titanic in space" quote.
posted by fandango_matt at 5:05 PM on April 18, 2005

How does differ from the version that has been on the P2P networks since the beginning of the month, other than being more expensive?
posted by keswick at 5:08 PM on April 18, 2005

I've read it. The fight scenes should be good, the rest of it will suck.
posted by Justin Case at 5:23 PM on April 18, 2005

Yeah, this movie is bound to crash and sink when it hits the jagged iceburg of George Lucas' ego.
posted by papercake at 5:25 PM on April 18, 2005

My childhood means nothing anymore.
posted by borkingchikapa at 5:34 PM on April 18, 2005

Look, if you're not going to take this seriously, I'm out of here.
posted by robocop is bleeding at 5:49 PM on April 18, 2005

.....Or you could just go read the novelization at the bookstore that's been on the shelf for the last two weeks.
posted by XQUZYPHYR at 5:51 PM on April 18, 2005

Star Wars has always been more about the visuals then the story, and Episode III looks pretty good...

I mean, we finally get to see a shitload of wookies... at least something will take the bad taste out of my mouth from seeing Boy Boba Fett.

BTW: Newfers rules
posted by Derek at 7:37 PM on April 18, 2005

ooh! ooh! i know the big plot twist!
[spoiler]















it's the sled.

also, amidala is really a man.
posted by pxe2000 at 7:55 PM on April 18, 2005

I did an interview with lucas about the recent changes to the latest starwars release and the new film here
posted by joelf at 8:11 PM on April 18, 2005

It's very telling!
posted by joelf at 8:11 PM on April 18, 2005

Virtually every spoiler I've heard is in total harmony with the speculation on a fanboy site I read YEARS ago. He had pieced it together from a myriad interviews, novels, comic books and such ... and was just supplying it as exposition to better understand the original movies.
posted by RavinDave at 8:28 PM on April 18, 2005

Or you could play LEGO starwars, then you wont have to watch any of the movies.
posted by Iax at 8:28 PM on April 18, 2005

I did an interview with lucas about the recent changes to the latest starwars release and the new film here

Princeton Metafilter needs a guy like joelf...
posted by jperkins at 8:32 PM on April 18, 2005

mmmm..... shitload of wookies...
posted by spilon at 8:32 PM on April 18, 2005

Maybe having the screenplay will let me know when Portman flashes her nips. Because I sure as hell ain't gonna watch it for any acting.
posted by klangklangston at 9:00 PM on April 18, 2005

Bryan, thanks for the "BTW: Newfers rules"!

It made my night!

And you KNOW I'll be going to see this movie , all kidding aside. I kinda liked the last flick.
posted by newfers at 9:14 PM on April 18, 2005

Look, if you're not going to take this seriously, I'm out of here.

Hah! That skit was excellent, nice reference.
posted by nightchrome at 10:00 PM on April 18, 2005

there's no way this is real.... they don't even list a phone number.
posted by RightsaidFRED at 5:07 AM on April 19, 2005

it's the sled.

also, amidala is really a man.

Heh. And Palpatine is really Kaiser Souse. And he's a ghost.
posted by unreason at 5:39 AM on April 19, 2005

Kaiser Souse? What is he, a drunk?
posted by longbaugh at 7:32 AM on April 19, 2005