Stop torturing yourself, you silly bastards!

July 28, 2005 2:07 PM

A nonist public service pamphlet. Here you will find a 6 page pamphlet meant as a public service to help educate bloggers about the growing problem of blog depression. ;)
posted by FunkyHelix (14 comments total)

Nice.
posted by turbodog at 2:48 PM on July 28, 2005

Wait. I forget. What's a "blog" again?
posted by MaxVonCretin at 3:07 PM on July 28, 2005

Cute. I remember something similar earlier in the blog timeline (5 years ago or so). This one's is much, much more polished, however.

If you do not blog for your own pleasure, you're in for some serious blog depression.

Unless you get paid for it. Then it's a job like any other (which can still be quite depressing).
posted by mrgrimm at 3:13 PM on July 28, 2005

Blogging while depressed isn't anywhere near as much fun to do or to read as blogging while drunk and naked.

They missed a major symptom of Blog Depression though, intentionally going to other blogs to pick fights with them in the hopes that they'll come to your site and bump your traffic stats.

And if something I covered two years ago got picked up by Boing Boing, I'd be all like "Dude, that's so old, you suck. Now give me my damned attribution so I can get two more bucks in clickthroughs from my Google Adsense ads."

Now if something I wrote or did got picked up by MeFi? That would be like sleeping with a supermodel and having your buddy accidentally walk in and catch you. Which is to say, totally cool. Because he can now verify that you were banging a supermodel, not so he can verify you have a small wanger (not that there's anything wrong with that, calm down you small wanger MeFite's).
posted by fenriq at 3:14 PM on July 28, 2005

Calacanis has happy pro bloggers.
posted by NickDouglas at 8:55 PM on July 28, 2005

Calacanis has happy pro bloggers.

Oh my!

"WIN’s outward facing business model—the one the public experiences—is as a long tail publisher. We’ve got a bunch blogs, a bunch of bloggers, and a bunch of advertisers. We surf Chris’ long tail to profitability. Case closed, you can file us away in your dotcom history books as the latest evolution of the AOL Greenhouse, GeoCities, and About.com breed.

However, the truth is that what we are creating has nothing to do with publishing. What we’re creating is a lifestyle for passionate people that *results* in our outward facing business model."

"S'cuse me, Don't bogart that joint my friend!"
posted by ericb at 9:33 PM on July 28, 2005

"Buzz word" *plus* "buzz word" *minus* any sense of the real world = a fucked-up bullshit fantasy and utopian vision of a non-sensical business model.
posted by ericb at 9:39 PM on July 28, 2005

This touches a nerve. I blog only about things I like, so during the lean days/weeks, it's that much more obvious that fun is running low in one's life.
posted by of strange foe at 9:48 PM on July 28, 2005

"outward facing business model"
posted by ericb at 9:54 PM on July 28, 2005

I don't have blog depression. I have blog guilt. The subject of my blog is relatively narrow, and there's only so much I feel like saying. As the days (and sometimes weeks) pile up between posts, I start to get really angsty about it. What the fuck?
posted by ereshkigal45 at 9:56 PM on July 28, 2005

I've noticed that flame wars are dying out in the comments, too.

Peace in our time? Or just exhaustion.

I remember the good old days. Somebody would scream at you that you were Stalinist scum within two comments.

The steam seems to be running out of the blogosphere.

Tell me it isn't true.
posted by Shouting at 5:22 AM on July 29, 2005

D'oh. Even The Doorman seems to be feeling the ennui.
posted by robocop is bleeding at 6:30 AM on July 29, 2005

What we’re creating is a lifestyle for passionate people ...

"If you want to know what a moronic word 'lifestyle' is, all you have to do is realize that in a technical sense, Atilla the Hun had an active outdoor lifestyle."

-- George Carlin
posted by krinklyfig at 11:29 PM on July 29, 2005

Nice.
posted by OmieWise at 10:51 AM on August 1, 2005