Comments on: I'm Still Alive

I'm Still Alive

jragon — Wed, 17 Aug 2005 17:11:26 -0800

Death By Caffeine I just learned that it would take 155.11 cans of Mountain Dew to kill me, according to this odd little service.

By: brundlefly

brundlefly — Wed, 17 Aug 2005 17:19:55 -0800

Interesting that it doesn't specify a time-frame (as far as I can tell). Evidently it would take 400-something cans of Barq's Root Beer to kill me, but I'm pretty damn sure I've downed that many in my time! (Yes, I assume this means all at once...)

By: redbeard

redbeard — Wed, 17 Aug 2005 17:34:27 -0800

Where's coffee? Espresso? Mocha Latte Frapuccino?!?!?!?!?!?! This of course does make me want to get 174 cans of red bull, empty them into a pot over medium heat, bring it to a boil, and then reduce the stuff down to a thick syrup of death.

By: i_am_joe's_spleen

i_am_joe's_spleen — Wed, 17 Aug 2005 17:38:37 -0800

Apparently caffeinated drinks don't exist if they're not branded. Lame.

By: tiamat

tiamat — Wed, 17 Aug 2005 17:47:13 -0800

Caffeine: ORL-RAT LD50 192 mg kg-1 Now if only I knew what that meant...

By: ROU_Xenophobe

ROU_Xenophobe — Wed, 17 Aug 2005 17:56:49 -0800

If you feed critters 192mg per kg of mass, half of them die.

By: davy

davy — Wed, 17 Aug 2005 17:58:14 -0800

Damn, 260.68 cans of RC Cola? I really like RC, but if I were out to die I'd rather play in traffic.

By: SteveTheRed

SteveTheRed — Wed, 17 Aug 2005 17:59:24 -0800

tiamat: Caffeine: ORL-RAT LD50 192 mg kg-1 Now if only I knew what that meant... I think it means that when given to rats, a dose of 192 mg per kg of body weight resulted in the death of 50% of the rats.

By: jb

jb — Wed, 17 Aug 2005 18:03:54 -0800

redbeard - exactly. No coffee, or tea? What is this list for, caffeine pansies?

By: hal9k

hal9k — Wed, 17 Aug 2005 18:05:32 -0800

Next: how to slip it syrupticiously into the diet of your enemy without them knowing it....

By: hal9k

hal9k — Wed, 17 Aug 2005 18:08:01 -0800

"It was (burp) YOU! I trusted you and (aaarrrrpppp) you've been (braaaackkkk!) killing me so all along! Aaaaaah!!! (blurp)"

By: amberglow

amberglow — Wed, 17 Aug 2005 18:10:30 -0800

251.45 cans of Pepsi to off me coffee should really be on that list.

By: Effigy2000

Effigy2000 — Wed, 17 Aug 2005 18:11:10 -0800

It would take 400.40 cans of Diet Coke to "put medown", apparently. Assuming I don't chug the drink down, it takes me roughly 10 minutes to drink 375ml of Diet Coke. That's 6 cans an hour. 144 cans a day. Probably less given all the toilet breaks that drinking so much Diet Coke would bring on. This means I'd have to drink for roughly 3 days straight to bring on death. Meh. Sounds like far too much effort. And I don't really want to die anyway. But it's kind of interesting to know. Great link.

By: Jikido

Jikido — Wed, 17 Aug 2005 18:14:52 -0800

Now that you've had the 5 second intro, here's what you came for: Name Ounces Caffeine (mg) mg/oz Starbucks Double Shot 6.5 120 18.46

By: matteo

matteo — Wed, 17 Aug 2005 18:20:05 -0800

*hands shaking uncontrollably, pisses himself, without even buying a 50-dollar iBook*

By: edgeways

edgeways — Wed, 17 Aug 2005 18:20:24 -0800

Pah, just go for the No-doz, you could actually accomplish something in a reasonable amount of time

By: gorgor_balabala

gorgor_balabala — Wed, 17 Aug 2005 18:23:37 -0800

How many adderall is that?

By: eriko

eriko — Wed, 17 Aug 2005 18:25:52 -0800

Remember, kids: It only takes one can of Pepsi to kill you. Provided, of course, somebody throws it hard enough.

By: jeremy b

jeremy b — Wed, 17 Aug 2005 18:32:21 -0800

uh i dont get it ive drunk way more than 304 cans of diet coke and i'm still alive. ..or are I?

By: zerokey

zerokey — Wed, 17 Aug 2005 18:44:35 -0800

SteveTheRed is correct. LD50 is the lethal dose for 50% of the test population. For the curious, here's the LD50 for a slew of drugs via Erowid. (gorgor_balabala: look here.)

By: zerokey

zerokey — Wed, 17 Aug 2005 18:46:34 -0800

er...this is the link I meant for the LD50 list. oopsie.

By: mygothlaundry

mygothlaundry — Wed, 17 Aug 2005 19:03:19 -0800

hal9k, it's a good thing I wasn't drinking a caffeinated beverage when I read that. Because it would have hurt coming out my nose.

By: puke & cry

puke & cry — Wed, 17 Aug 2005 19:40:35 -0800

i'm just getting an error: WordPress database error: [Got error 28 from storage engine] SELECT DISTINCT * FROM wp_posts WHERE 1=1 AND post_name = 'death-by-caffeine' AND post_date_gmt <= '2005-08-18 02:40:59' AND (post_status = "static") GROUP BY wp_posts.ID ORDER BY post_date DESC LIMIT 0, 10

By: Alison

Alison — Wed, 17 Aug 2005 20:12:17 -0800

It would take 35.15 cans of BuzzWater to put you down. This one seems doable if I ever choose to stop living. I'll make a note of that.

By: Jazznoisehere

Jazznoisehere — Wed, 17 Aug 2005 20:13:39 -0800

WordPress database error: [Got error 28 from storage engine] SELECT DISTINCT * FROM wp_posts WHERE 1=1 AND post_name = 'death-by-caffeine' AND post_date_gmt < '2005-08-18 02:40:59' and (post_status="static" ) group by wp_posts.id order by post_date desc limit 0, 10/em> So THAT's the entry for coffee.

By: piratebowling

piratebowling — Wed, 17 Aug 2005 20:37:03 -0800

"Remember, kids: It only takes one can of Pepsi to kill you. Provided, of course, somebody throws it hard enough." Or if you mix it with poprocks. SHUT UP! It is TOO true! It's how Mikey died.

By: PurplePorpoise

PurplePorpoise — Wed, 17 Aug 2005 20:47:36 -0800

...and then reduce the stuff down to a thick syrup of death. - posted by redbeard A pack of cigarettes works better =) It only takes one can of Pepsi to kill you. Provided, of course, somebody throws it hard enough. - posted by eriko I guess that's what re-purposed potato guns are for, eh?

By: puke & cry

puke & cry — Wed, 17 Aug 2005 20:57:51 -0800

Ah, it's working now. It would take 232.05 cans of Diet Coke to put you down. I think it would take less than that to bust my stomach open and kill me. Nevermind that you would vomit before you got there.

By: puke & cry

puke & cry — Wed, 17 Aug 2005 21:13:41 -0800

It would take 87.02 cans of Starbucks Double Shot to put you down. So 87.02 cans at 6.5 ounces per can, that's 565.63 ounces. At 120 mg caffeine per can, that's 18.47 mg/ounce. It would take 52.21 cans of BuzzWater to put you down. 52.21 cans at 16.9 ounces per can, that's 882.349 ounces. At 200 mg caffeine per can, that's 11.83 mg/ounce. Clearly, doubleshot is a better killer.

By: MrBadExample

MrBadExample — Wed, 17 Aug 2005 21:14:23 -0800

It would take 725.83 cans of Peach Tea Snapple to put you down. Lucky thing I got that Costco membership.

By: puke & cry

puke & cry — Wed, 17 Aug 2005 21:15:03 -0800

I would like to see additional starbucks drinks here.

By: jay.jansheski

jay.jansheski — Thu, 18 Aug 2005 02:41:19 -0800

I need to know how many venti red-eyes it would take. I may be close to finding out. I'll add it to my will that somebody has to come back here and post the number.

By: srboisvert

srboisvert — Thu, 18 Aug 2005 02:43:09 -0800

Does this all still apply if I am wearing a healing crystal?

By: srboisvert

srboisvert — Thu, 18 Aug 2005 03:16:23 -0800

By the way these amounts of any liquid, caffeine or not, will probably kill you anyway from hyponatremia.

By: blacklite

blacklite — Thu, 18 Aug 2005 03:36:33 -0800

This is lame. I just wanted to check 'coffee', you know. That thing that old, non-cool people like me drink? So, I had to go look myself; apparently coffee can range from 75-250 mg per 6 oz, but generally it's close to 100mg. It would take 17.28g of caffeine for my 90kg to hit LD50, which means about a hundred and seventy-three 6 oz cups, or 30.66 litres of coffee. You'd even have to eat at least an entire bottle of caffeine pills to hit it. I guess I"m not too worried about caffeine overdose as death. And there are definite health benefits!

Intake of caffeine can up to halve a patient's risk of diabetes mellitus type 2. While this was originally noticed in patients who consumed high amounts (7 cups a day), the relationship has now been shown to be linear (Salazar-Martinez 2004).

By: blacklite

blacklite — Thu, 18 Aug 2005 04:33:56 -0800

Oh, and to brundlefly's question above about time-frame, apparently the metabolic half-life of caffeine, i.e., the time it takes for your body to process 50% of it, is generally somewhere around 5 hours for adult humans. (Although it can vary a lot.) So you'd have to probably drink more than 400 cans of Barq's. If you could average one can a minute (which would be pretty impressive).... hm, it's a differential equation, isn't it. .. ah. with no solution. Assuming you metabolize caffeine at the above rate, one can of Barq's a minute would never get you above 10 grams of caffeine in your bloodstream. (Although see above re hyponatremia.) It'd take you 184 cups of espresso at that rate to hit 15g in your bloodstream. ... I really think I'd be good after #10...

By: sciurus

sciurus — Thu, 18 Aug 2005 04:49:25 -0800

It would take 257.83 cans of TAB to put me down.

By: eriko

eriko — Thu, 18 Aug 2005 05:13:29 -0800

hyponatremia The lack of R.E.M music as an infant?

By: alumshubby

alumshubby — Thu, 18 Aug 2005 05:35:27 -0800

I wonder how large a serving of chocolate-covered coffee beans would do the trick...?

By: bitter-girl.com

bitter-girl.com — Thu, 18 Aug 2005 06:21:02 -0800

"Thick syrup of death." My official Funny Phrase du Jour -- thanks, Redbeard!

By: Secret Life of Gravy

Secret Life of Gravy — Thu, 18 Aug 2005 09:58:53 -0800

Only a couple thousand bottles of decaffinated Lemon Tea Snapple needed to snuff me. Probably be a whole lot easier to just crush myself to death. I wonder how much 2000 bottles of decaffinated Lemon Tea Snapple weigh? Anyway the sugar would undoubtably kill me first.

By: slogger

slogger — Thu, 18 Aug 2005 13:54:50 -0800

silly me, i was putting in the weight of the beverage, not the weight of my body. no wonder it would only take 0.62 cups of coffee to off me

By: graventy

graventy — Thu, 18 Aug 2005 14:29:16 -0800

Actually, the water in Barq's would end up killing you before the caffeine did.

By: OmieWise

OmieWise — Fri, 19 Aug 2005 08:02:38 -0800

What about No-Doze?

By: jragon

jragon — Fri, 19 Aug 2005 13:06:06 -0800

Oh jeez, somehow the comments have devolved into talking about politics: as for the Middle East, I'm Canadian and i fully support the actions taken by the US forces. I firmly believe that if the American Leadership was not so conserned with plakating the bleeding heart nations, Afganistan would have been bombed flat moments after the towers fell in NYC. but it was not.