We all wish we could, I suppose.

September 8, 2005 3:34 PM

On live TV, irate Miss. man tells Cheney to "self-copulate"Thus turns the karmic wheel ? Recall: over a year ago VP Cheney said ' "I expressed myself rather forcefully, felt better after I had done it," after he told Vermont Senator Patrick Leahey - on the floor of the US Senate - to "Go f_ck" himself. Today, during Cheney's tour of storm damaged Miss., a resident approached Cheney's press meeting and shouted: "Go f_ck yourself, Mr. Cheney!!  Go f_ck yourself!!!". The exhortation was aired on at least one national cable channel. Here is the video ( ALT ). The LA Times,CNN, and FOX are carrying the story.
posted by troutfishing (127 comments total)

"I think this media opportunity today is a terrible waste of time and taxpayer money," [resident Lynn Lofton] said. "They've picked a nice neighborhood where people have insurance and most are Republicans."
posted by Rothko at 3:37 PM on September 8, 2005

You post to MetaFitler that some guy in Mississippi told Cheney to fuck himself?

Brilliant.
posted by xmutex at 3:37 PM on September 8, 2005

That's what MetaChat is for damnit.
posted by Armitage Shanks at 3:39 PM on September 8, 2005

Has there been a natural disaster somewhere? I only ask as I've had my head up a fucking horse's arse for the past two weeks so have no idea what's been going on in the world...
posted by i_cola at 3:41 PM on September 8, 2005

How can such a little dick fill such a big asshole?
posted by mischief at 3:43 PM on September 8, 2005

Somebody wants Cheney to go fuck himself?

I'm shocked. shocked.
posted by mosch at 3:44 PM on September 8, 2005

... as I've had my head up a fucking horse's arse ...

I'd like to welcome our newest MeFi member, Michael Brown.
posted by odinsdream at 3:45 PM on September 8, 2005

"First time I've heard it."

Hmm. Somehow I doubt that.
posted by billysumday at 3:45 PM on September 8, 2005

"MetaFitler" ?
posted by troutfishing at 3:46 PM on September 8, 2005

I was hoping the link showed Cheney self-copulating.

Like mischief, I was wondering.
posted by cleardawn at 3:47 PM on September 8, 2005

I love this part:

Reporter: "Are you getting a lot of that Mr. Vice President?"
Cheney: "Thats the first time I've heard it..."
Cheney's Brain: "oh shit, even that's a lie... ah... laugh, LAUGH!
Cheney: "meh..heh...haaaa"
posted by odinsdream at 3:48 PM on September 8, 2005

Metafilter: Go f_ck yourself, Mr. Cheney!
posted by reality at 3:49 PM on September 8, 2005

ow dear, someone dared to disrupt a PRESS CONFERENCE ??

the horror, the horror
posted by Substrata at 3:50 PM on September 8, 2005

d-d-did he?
posted by TwelveTwo at 3:51 PM on September 8, 2005

Yes, he did. He is a nimble man.
posted by robocop is bleeding at 3:51 PM on September 8, 2005

More of this please, America.
posted by Acey at 3:53 PM on September 8, 2005

Apparently, hurricanes damage the ability of the Bush White house to stage manage press conferences. An independent panel should be appointed -- even Bush might get behind that one. He might get behind the independent panel, too.

Oh wait, Cheney would probably be behind.
posted by teece at 3:53 PM on September 8, 2005

Has there been a natural disaster somewhere? I only ask as I've had my head up a fucking horse's arse for the past two weeks so have no idea what's been going on in the world...

Is this thread 110 or 111? I might have lost count.
posted by fixedgear at 3:54 PM on September 8, 2005

Wow. I figured Cheney would still be in a secret bunker somewhere out of fear that the hurricanes might come after him next.
posted by Joey Michaels at 3:59 PM on September 8, 2005

So, if someone actually does "Go fuck themself" is it sodomy?

Because we all know how down the GOP is on the old back door bump, at least publically, not sure how many are totally down with it privately.

Anyone seen video of Cheney's tour? I'm curious if they were able to hide his erection from the cameras and what they did to muffle his cackling laugh?
posted by fenriq at 4:02 PM on September 8, 2005

if they spent even a fraction of the time they do stagemanaging these appearances in actually maybe helping people out, we'd be in much much better shape.
posted by amberglow at 4:03 PM on September 8, 2005

if they spent even a fraction of the time money they do stagemanaging these appearances in actually maybe helping people out, we'd be in much much better shape.
posted by Jon-o at 4:06 PM on September 8, 2005

"I think the progress we're making is significant," Cheney said. "I think the performance, in general, at least in terms of the information I've received from locals, is definitely very impressive."

He added: "That's not to say there's not an awful lot of work to be done -- there is."

Who exactly are you reassuring, Mr Real President ? Your government founded (50$ billion allocated so far but more to come I guess) reconstruction business friends maybe ? Certainly them, as nobody had half a doubt NO is a royal mess...yet we want to let them know the mess requires more then a few thousand cops/firefireghters/soldier work to be fixed..it requires yummy yummy business contracts !

Isn't it curious the guubment is evul , bAAAd ...democracy a failure, law and rights an annoyance to law of nature/god..that people is evil and lazy and some maybe of a distasteful tint or questionable-because-different morals ?

... yet most if not every government-as-institution detractor happily takes taxpayer money ? I haven't heard about privates rejecting money from the $50B fund allocated so far ?
posted by elpapacito at 4:10 PM on September 8, 2005

Sounds like more & more of the governed are withdrawing their consent from the murderous bastards. About time.
posted by muckster at 4:12 PM on September 8, 2005

Oh, it gets better. Discussion on CNN about this.

Cafferty: The vice-president said that was the first time he heard it. Didn't he utter the same phrase to Senator Patrick Leahy on the floor of the United States Senate?

Blitzer: Yes.

Cafferty: So it wasn't the first time he heard it.

Blitzer: The first time he heard it in the context of this trip.

Cafferty: You know what, I bet it's not the last.

Bing!
posted by eriko at 4:13 PM on September 8, 2005

It seems like nobody in the US Government can stop being smug for any reason, for any length of time.
posted by fire&wings at 4:17 PM on September 8, 2005

Here's where everyone who speaks at, arranges, and sets up these spectacles should be sent
posted by amberglow at 4:19 PM on September 8, 2005

You post to MetaFitler that some guy in Mississippi told Cheney to fuck himself?

Brilliant.

it was aired on national TV. does it happen often, the VP being insulted like that on national TV? I think not.
not to mention, as trout points out, Cheney himself is OK with making arguments "forcefully"
freedom of speech and al that. democracy in action. it's so Tocquevillian.
good post.
posted by matteo at 4:20 PM on September 8, 2005

yeah, where has the cockbite been? why is he just now surfacing?
posted by ackeber at 4:25 PM on September 8, 2005

Heh.

This was just a setup for those sorts of comment. Cafferty gets the Mr. Sardonic award.

They should start quoting Mr. Cheney's "if it feels good, do it !" defense.

FLASHBACK : I posted something about Cheney and the use of the "F-word" last year on Metafilter. Here it is.

Metafilter, July 4 2004

In heartland, Cheney touts "conservative values" and therapeutic use of "F-word"
After his controversial, widely and inconsistently reported use of the "F-word" - recently declared to be "abhorrent" by FCC head Michael Powell (as uttered by Bono) - Dick Cheney's "no regrets", "felt better after I had done it" justification suggests that the "if it feels good, do it" ethic of the 60's counterculture has now spread to the conservative mainstream. Some see a role reversal, as a confused type of postmodernist, relativistic thinking gnaws into the conservative zeitgeist. Seventy year old Florence Orris, at a Parma, Ohio Cheney/Republican rally, sympathized with Cheney's "F-word" catharsis, and with relativist values : "I'm almost getting to that point with my Democratic friends..." (from main link) "Conservatism, as I understand it, has always had as its end the cultivation of virtue in the individual and the community," writes one conservative who asks - is it reasonable to look towards the state, and to potty mouthed politicians, for the promotion of public values? Laments one observer of the "Culture Wars", "Who is behind the effort to undermine our moral standards and enslave our people?"
posted by troutfishing at 4:29 PM on September 8, 2005

Agence France Presse: Vice President Cheney Heckled on Hurricane Tour
posted by muckster at 4:34 PM on September 8, 2005

I want the Big Dick to address my concerns at his next press confernece...why are so many people in New Orleans wearing sandals as they walk around the ruined city? I thought they were saying skin-contact with the muck was dangerous...

Lady in sandals

More sandals

The people want to know the truth.
posted by nomisxid at 4:34 PM on September 8, 2005

zzzzzzzzzzzzzz..........................
posted by snsranch at 4:34 PM on September 8, 2005

Don't forget that unlike most people, Dick actually has the means to fuck himself.
posted by mr.marx at 4:39 PM on September 8, 2005

Yes! The spell seems to be breaking. Mississippi Goddam! I knew my faith would be rewarded.
posted by jonmc at 4:39 PM on September 8, 2005

Nobody touches Cheney ! [ Bob the Angry Flower comic ]
posted by troutfishing at 4:41 PM on September 8, 2005

Love the caption here:


posted by H. Roark at 4:45 PM on September 8, 2005

nomisxid: because you actually need to be into water to be in danger...so if you're not in water , you can wear sandal. Get it ? Sandal + Water = Bad , Sandal + No water = OK.

You sure you're not employed at Homeland Security - Fema are you ?
posted by elpapacito at 4:47 PM on September 8, 2005

Do it.
posted by The Jesse Helms at 4:47 PM on September 8, 2005

mr.marx - That's a creepy picture. Especially because of the proximity of that little girl in the picture to Cheney's notably large crotch protrusion. He doesn't seem especially modest around children.
posted by troutfishing at 4:47 PM on September 8, 2005

amberglow, that link is just breathtaking. Thanks for posting that.

The difference between a human response and a FEMA response, right there.

Just looking at that "dormitory" ... Jesus.
posted by cleardawn at 4:51 PM on September 8, 2005

mr.marx, I believe Dick is wearing one of these in that shot. Looks like it's full, too.
posted by xiffix at 4:52 PM on September 8, 2005

Jonmc, was that a Ry Cooder reference? I can't think of the tune off the top of my head, but I'm hearing it....
posted by mmahaffie at 4:52 PM on September 8, 2005

"MetaFitler" ?"

No, more like MetaHitler.
posted by ParisParamus at 4:54 PM on September 8, 2005

Bush Approval Rating Hits New Low (nice pic too!).

mr.marx, that's a really strange place to keep a potato wrapped in tin foil but it sure seems to make him happy. Maybe its the tail end of the bug that crawled up his ass three decades ago?
posted by fenriq at 4:54 PM on September 8, 2005

"MetaFitler" ?"

No, more like MetaHitler.

Oh no he didn't!
posted by billysumday at 4:56 PM on September 8, 2005

Nina Simone, mmahaffie. I'm just glad that the Red State/redneck crowd seems to be coming around. This is good for us, since once you've got them on your side, they are the fiercest, most loyal motherfuckers on the planet.
posted by jonmc at 4:56 PM on September 8, 2005

Paris, as someone who's defended you on occasion, I'm gonna tell you straight-out: give it a fucking rest.
posted by jonmc at 4:57 PM on September 8, 2005

billysumday, flag his obvious troll and move on, responding encourages him.
posted by fenriq at 4:58 PM on September 8, 2005

jonmc, I am so overwhelmed by the aggregate immaturity of Mefi these days that, well, I'm just going into lurk mode and sticking to IRC and Metatalk. At least as far as I Hate Bush threads go...

PS: I do appreciate your kind words.
posted by ParisParamus at 5:00 PM on September 8, 2005

Yeah, obscentity-spewing disruptors get support like nothing else. Republicans will be lining up to switch parties. It will galvanize the democrat vote. They like and respect those that yell such things at our elected leaders.

It helps if you call them "Nazis", too.

Yep, the House, Senate and Presidency are just going to jump back into democrat hands if the folks at Daily KOS and moveon.org don't get duct taped and locked back in the closet first.
posted by kablam at 5:03 PM on September 8, 2005

I can't believe the news story referred to the guy as a "protester", as opposed to a Katrina survivor or something more appropriate.

He got to have his say to the powers that be, and it only took him having his life turned upside down and being ignored by the federal government for a week to do it!
posted by insomnia_lj at 5:09 PM on September 8, 2005

kablam: What's Cheney going to do when he gives an order and everyone just stares at him and says: "Go fuck yourself?"

And if you think voting makes any difference, or that Cheney is America's elected leader, you've never heard of Diebold.

It's only when everyone - including you - is prepared to tell these people where to get off that they will get off. Until then, enjoy the ride.
posted by cleardawn at 5:10 PM on September 8, 2005

From the yahoo article:

His approval rating slipped to 40 percent, down four points since July to the lowest point Pew has recorded.

Wow. Lowest ever? I guess people are finally starting to come around. I just wish it hadn't taken this for them to realize it.

And where has Cheney been until now? I assumed he was just lurking in his underground lair or something.
posted by kosher_jenny at 5:12 PM on September 8, 2005

Cheney was on vacation in Wyoming until last Sunday I believe. Now he's down there to make sure everything's going smoothly for Halliburton's contracts.
posted by muckster at 5:13 PM on September 8, 2005

"I'm just going into lurk mode and sticking to IRC and Metatalk."

Sounds like an excellent plan.
posted by mr_crash_davis at 5:15 PM on September 8, 2005

if they spent even a fraction of the time they do stagemanaging these appearances in actually maybe helping people out, we'd be in much much better shape.

Um, yeah... an interview on the street, where a heckler within spitting distance can shout you down on nat'l TV and tell you to "GO F YOURSELF." Masterfully stagemanaged.

I can't believe the news story referred to the guy as a "protester", as opposed to a Katrina survivor or something more appropriate.

Well, the heckler didn't have the native accent. So he was probably a reporter... or a friend of John... er... nevermind.
posted by b_thinky at 5:17 PM on September 8, 2005

Every other two-term presidency since Eisenhower (including JFK/LBJ) has been in a very tight band of 55-65% approval at this point, it's like there's some weird nexus point (graph)...

Ah, except Nixon. In August 1973 he had just about hit rock bottom, falling under 30%. When I made that chart late last month I didn't know exactly what could drive Bush under 40% to more fully track Nixon's demise, but maybe now (with Katrina and the ongoing trainwreck in Iraq) Toto has exposed the wizard, the signal has been jammed, and/or the gloves are off.

Keep hope alive.
posted by Heywood Mogroot at 5:25 PM on September 8, 2005

So that's Cheney in loopback.jpg?
posted by wakko at 5:26 PM on September 8, 2005

ParisParamus writes "jonmc, I am so overwhelmed by the aggregate immaturity of Mefi these days that, well, I'm just going into lurk mode"

Oh sure, let's see how long *that* promise lasts.
posted by clevershark at 5:28 PM on September 8, 2005

He said "Go fuck yourself, Mr. Cheney. Go fuck yourself."

I can't believe he actually called Cheney Mister.
posted by davy at 5:36 PM on September 8, 2005

I saw the "va te faire futre" moment live on CNN at lunchtime--had a good laugh at the expense of Biggus Diccus. . . made my day. Bet a few CNN sphincters tightened up when the live feed went out. . .
posted by rdone at 5:52 PM on September 8, 2005

Jonmc, in retrospect, I'd bet ol' Ry was quoting Nina Simone.

By the way, what is this "ParisParamus" people keep talking about? [blinks ... innocently]
posted by mmahaffie at 5:53 PM on September 8, 2005

amberglow, that link is just breathtaking. Thanks for posting that.

The difference between a human response and a FEMA response, right there.

Just looking at that "dormitory" ... Jesus.


.
posted by nervousfritz at 6:00 PM on September 8, 2005

Perfect, jonmc:

Oh but this whole country is full of lies
You're all gonna die and die like flies
I don't trust you anymore
You keep on saying go slow go slow

But that's just the trouble too slow
Desegregation too slow
Mass participation too slow
Unification too slow
Do things gradually too slow
Will bring more tragedy too slow
posted by muckster at 6:02 PM on September 8, 2005

muckster, this song (by my main man James McMurtry-who you'd love) is a perfect anthem for what's happening to change things:

Vietnam Vet with a cardboard sign
Sitting there by the left turn line
Flag on the wheelchair flapping in the breeze
One leg missing, both hands free
No one's paying much mind to him
The V.A. budget's stretched so thin
And there's more comin' home from the Mideast war
We can't make it here anymore

That big ol' building was the textile mill
It fed our kids and it paid our bills
But they turned us out and they closed the doors
We can't make it here anymore
See all those pallets piled up on the loading dock
They're just gonna set there till they rot
'Cause there's nothing to ship, nothing to pack
Just busted concrete and rusted tracks
Empty storefronts around the square
There's a needle in the gutter and glass everywhere
You don't come down here 'less you're looking to score
We can't make it here anymore

The bar's still open but man it's slow
The tip jar's light and the register's low
The bartender don't have much to say
The regular crowd gets thinner each day
Some have maxed out all their credit cards
Some are workin? two jobs and livin? in cars
Minimum wage won't pay for a roof, won't pay for a drink
If you gotta have proof just try it yourself Mr. CEO
See how far 5.15 an hour will go
Take a part time job at one of your stores
Bet you can't make it here anymore

High school girl with a bourgeois dream
Just like the pictures in the magazine
She found on the floor of the laundromat
A woman with kids can forget all that
If she comes up pregnant what'll she do
Forget the career, forget about school
Can she live on faith? live on hope?
High on Jesus or hooked on dope
When it's way too late to just say no
You can't make it here anymore

Now I'm stocking shirts in the Wal-Mart store
Just like the ones we made before
'Cept this one came from Singapore
I guess we can't make it here anymore
Should I hate a people for the shade of their skin
Or the shape of their eyes or the shape I'm in
Should I hate 'em for having our jobs today
No I hate the men sent the jobs away
I can see them all now, they haunt my dreams
All lily white and squeaky clean
They've never known want, they'll never know need
Their shit don't stink and their kids won't bleed
Their kids won't bleed in the damn little war
And we can't make it here anymore

Will work for food
Will die for oil
Will kill for power and to us the spoils
The billionaires get to pay less tax
The working poor get to fall through the cracks
Let 'em eat jellybeans let 'em eat cake
Let 'em eat shit, whatever it takes
They can join the Air Force, or join the Corps
If they can't make it here anymore

And that's how it is
That's what we got
If the president wants to admit it or not
You can read it in the paper
Read it on the wall
Hear it on the wind If you're listening at all
Get out of that limo
Look us in the eye
Call us on the cell phone
Tell us all why
In Dayton, Ohio
Or Portland, Maine
Or a cotton gin out on the great high plains
That's done closed down along with the school
And the hospital and the swimming pool
Dust devils dance in the noonday heat
There's rats in the alley
And trash in the street
Gang graffiti on a boxcar door
We can't make it here anymore
posted by jonmc at 6:06 PM on September 8, 2005

...I'm just going into lurk mode and sticking to IRC and Metatalk.

Hooray!*
posted by mullingitover at 6:06 PM on September 8, 2005

Up with incivility! I admire our potty-mouth heroes! Now if only somebody could give the finger at the White House or something, THAT would be a great front page post.
posted by esquire at 6:07 PM on September 8, 2005

There's a time for being polite, esquire. This is not it.
posted by muckster at 6:10 PM on September 8, 2005

So a cat CAN look at a king, after all.
posted by BoringPostcards at 6:11 PM on September 8, 2005

Muckster: you mean during Republican Administrations? The person who cursed out the President was being uncouth and silly. He should be ashamed of himself, not lauded by ostensibly sensible people.

Don't confuse some nincompoop for the zeitgeist, mm'kay. Someday, there might be elected some person whom you admire, and then some mannerless person might curse him or her out, and it won't be indicative of anything more than that person's lack of good judgment.
posted by esquire at 6:14 PM on September 8, 2005

There's a time for being polite, esquire. This is not it.

Yes. But we must be eloquently impolite, if you know what I'm saying.
posted by jonmc at 6:15 PM on September 8, 2005

Someday, there might be elected some person whom you admire, and then some mannerless person might curse him or her out,

Bill Clinton, whom I voted for twice and admire, was cussed out and ridiculed regularly (sometimes amusingly, I'll admit). Turnabout is fair play.
posted by jonmc at 6:17 PM on September 8, 2005

The person who cursed out the President was being uncouth and silly.

Now that's an interesting slip. Unless your the first with some good news.
posted by PinkStainlessTail at 6:25 PM on September 8, 2005

esquire: You mean like this?
posted by bashos_frog at 6:26 PM on September 8, 2005

Unless your the first with some good news.

Cheney becoming president is good news? Trading a simpleton for a psycho is not trading up, dude.
posted by jonmc at 6:27 PM on September 8, 2005

**grinnin' like a madman** [this is good]

"if the folks at Daily KOS and moveon.org don't get duct taped and locked back in the closet first."

If that sort of thing happens, the shooting will start soon after. We Yankees know how to defend real freedom when the time comes.
posted by zoogleplex at 6:30 PM on September 8, 2005

Besides we all know that Cheney has been calling the shots since January 2001 anyway.
posted by clevershark at 6:30 PM on September 8, 2005

Someday, there might be elected some person whom you admire, and then some mannerless person might curse him or her out, and it won't be indicative of anything more than that person's lack of good judgment.

I remember back when Margaret Thatcher was still in power, and she was attacked at a public meet-n-greet (in England) by a woman carrying a bouquet of daffodils. I thought that was sort of beautiful and surreal... and very British.
posted by BoringPostcards at 6:31 PM on September 8, 2005

Trading a simpleton for a psycho is not trading up, dude.

Crazy is more interesting than dumb. Anything that's gonna come out of this administration will suck; might as well be interesting.
posted by PinkStainlessTail at 6:32 PM on September 8, 2005

At least as far as I Hate Bush threads go...

This is an I Hate Cheney thread.
posted by kirkaracha at 6:50 PM on September 8, 2005

jonmc/bashosfrog: I think it diminished President Bush that he flipped the bird in public. I thought it was crass and shameful when, for example, a UofC student made a big deal at his graduation of ceremoniously refusing to shake President Clinton's hand on stage. Maybe it's just that I have young children, but I do not think that public displays of profanity are appropriate. Maybe it's also that I have lived in Washington through enough administrations to know that the spiral of partisan incivility makes life pretty miserable for everybody here and isn't something to be encouraged or lauded. Whatever.
posted by esquire at 7:01 PM on September 8, 2005

Muckster: you mean during Republican Administrations?

No, I mean when an administration--Republican, Democrat, it doesn't matter--has, by their callous disregard, criminal negligence, incompetence, or worse, effected the death of a large number of those they were sworn to protect. Thousands of deaths could have been avoided if those fuckers had gotten their shit straight. There's nothing "civil" about letting thousands of your own citizens die in miserable circumstances.
posted by muckster at 7:05 PM on September 8, 2005

And let's also not forget about the "major league asshole" comment from a ways back.

Incivility? IOKIYAR, of course.
posted by bashos_frog at 7:05 PM on September 8, 2005

jonmc/bashosfrog: I think it diminished President Bush that he flipped the bird in public.

What Bush has done as President has diminished the office more than any casual profanity, esquire. I've called out lefty hyperbole more than just about any non-republican member of this site, and while I respect the office, I very much dislike the man holding it.

I thought it was crass and shameful when, for example, a UofC student made a big deal at his graduation of ceremoniously refusing to shake President Clinton's hand on stage.

If that's what that kid believed, good for him for sticking to his principles. I may disagree, but I respect commitment.
posted by jonmc at 7:07 PM on September 8, 2005

Cheney isn't crazy. He's extremely intelligent and completely focused on his goals, almost at an Asberger's level.

Which makes him far more dangerous than either a simpleton or a lunatic. At least with the simpleton or the lunatic, you can distract them with shiny objects before they do too much damage, assuming they haven't already pushed the big red button which looks oh so pretty.

But with a focused machine, there's not much you can do, other than pray for a complete meltdown of the circuitry.

So, sad as it may seem, we're better off with Bush.
posted by pandaharma at 7:34 PM on September 8, 2005

Cheney isn't crazy. He's extremely intelligent and completely focused on his goals, almost at an Asberger's level.

I meant "psycho" as in sociopathic*, but since somebody once called me a sociopath here, I was shy of using the word, but point taken pandaharma.

*he has demonstrated the narcissism and callousness that is the sociopaths cheif characteristic, whereas bush just seems to be simpleminded and pathologically naive.
posted by jonmc at 7:36 PM on September 8, 2005

If that's what that kid believed, good for him for sticking to his principles. I may disagree, but I respect commitment.

What principles were these? Do tell. What was the student so pissed off about that would equate to what happened to the guy in Miss.?
posted by raysmj at 7:40 PM on September 8, 2005

OK, so in this "mercy mission" to the Gulf are Cheney, Mrs. GFY Lynne, Gonzales and Chertoff. Man, talk about a clusterfuck!

Hope one of those kind Southerners invites Dick to a down-home dinner. Personally, I'd serve him fettuccine Alfredo, garlic bread and eggnog.
posted by rob511 at 7:40 PM on September 8, 2005

What principles were these? Do tell.

I didn't say I condoned or even understood the kids principles (esp. since esquire didn't provide any details of the incident) but if he honestly believed that Clinton was some kind of bad guy, at least he stuck to his guns.

That's all I'm saying, ray.
posted by jonmc at 7:41 PM on September 8, 2005

And let's also not forget about the "major league asshole" comment from a ways back.

Big time...
posted by mmahaffie at 7:42 PM on September 8, 2005

Clarification: Politeness, I think, can go out out the window when you've been royally screwed in some immediate way. And the whole media thing is involved here. By contrast, it sounds like the student was just being an asshole. Bill didn't have to come to his graduation, and I doubt he got that much glowing PR over it. Every prez speaks at graduations.
posted by raysmj at 7:44 PM on September 8, 2005

All I know is that with Bush's approval ratings at this toxic level, I would be getting a little nervous and sweaty if I were Iranian right now... Kim Jong Il should lie low, too. We all know how W like to put the 'action' in 'distraction.'
posted by umberto at 7:48 PM on September 8, 2005

Raysmj: do we have details on who the guy in Mississippi is, or are you just assuming that he was somehow mistreated/neglected/whatever by the federal government? I don't know the answer, so I am curious.

That said, I agree with you about the Chicago kids being a**holes. I thought that President Clinton was a scoundrel, but I still didn't make a scene when he and I happened to be in the same room.
posted by esquire at 8:04 PM on September 8, 2005

Fuck himself? Christ, how?
posted by KevinSkomsvold at 8:08 PM on September 8, 2005

Interview over, the cheney turned and slithered down the hallway to the room where the interloper was being held prisoner. He entered and nodded once at the guards, who left the room in a grateful hurry.

Basilisk stare fixed on the prisoner, the cheney tasted the air with his forked tongue and satisfied himself that this wretch was indeed a citizen and not one of the Ruling Class. His nictating membranes slowly closed and opened as he willed his claws back into their sheaths and suppressed the primordial urge reddening his brain -- he had another use for this one. The protestor gaped, but had no chance for any other reaction before the tail whipped up and over the cheney's head, burying the stinger in the prisoner's belly. He tried to speak, but the fast-acting venom had already paralyzed his vocal chords and he was quickly immobile.

The cheney dragged the helpless protestor back to his den underneath the Naval Observatory and dumped him on the floor in front of the chittering chenelizard spawn. Their blind, piggish eyes set in chubby faces -- almost identical to that of their mother, the constantly drunk daughter of his boss -- rolled wildly as they buried their beaks time and again in the still body of their prey.

The cheney leaned over to gaze into the man's dying eyes, waiting for the moment when he would recognize the place of his kind in this neocon world. He casually killed one of the spawn to steal the ribbon of gore in its mouth. Chewing contentedly, he sniggered and whispered, "Fuck me? No, fuck YOU, citizen."
posted by forrest at 8:13 PM on September 8, 2005

Yeah, obscentity-spewing disruptors get support like nothing else. Republicans will be lining up to switch parties.

Bush's declining approval is linked directly to slippage within his own party. "Among those who identify themselves as 'conservative Republicans,' Bush's job approval declined seven percentage points from the July survey and by 11 percentage points among those who describe themselves as 'moderate Republicans.''

Well whaddaya know, it's happening already! Good call!
posted by soyjoy at 8:18 PM on September 8, 2005

esquire: I have assumed that the guy's a local. And if he's a local, he's been directly impacted by federal negligence, by virtue of being a resident alone. If the guy's not a resident, he's just being a dick (unless of course he has relatives or some of his closest friends there-which would make him half to three-fourths of a dick, depending upon your perspective).
posted by raysmj at 8:20 PM on September 8, 2005

bush just seems to be simpleminded and pathologically naive.

jonmc, I think you're giving Bush too much credit for not being a dangerous A-hole in his own right. This was posted in one of the threads the other day; it's a unpleasant reminder of what a vindictive, cunning little twat W has always been.
posted by maryh at 8:24 PM on September 8, 2005

The GFY tirade wasn't the most shocking thing. After the protester/victim was hauled off and you hear a scuffle, Cheney then jokes that "'must be a friend of John..., er, ah - never mind'. Laughter ensues...."

Yeeeeaah, that was a real appropriate time to crack jokes. Haha, never miss a chance to make a Kerry joke, do ya. Dick. Talk about no decorum. That shocked me more than the Go Fuck Yourself-ness.
posted by NorthernSky at 8:33 PM on September 8, 2005

well, if he's busy fucking himself, he won't be able to fuck anyone else ... unless he's got more than one dick

does bush count as a dick? ... hmmmm ...
posted by pyramid termite at 8:48 PM on September 8, 2005

Yes. But we must be eloquently impolite, if you know what I'm saying.

Yes, by addressing the target as "Mister."
posted by deanc at 8:57 PM on September 8, 2005

I think it diminished President Bush that he flipped the bird in public. I thought it was crass and shameful when, for example, a UofC student made a big deal at his graduation of ceremoniously refusing to shake President Clinton's hand on stage.

You are a delicate flower, aren't you! I'll try to be more circumspect in order not endanger your sensitive disposition.

I might suggest that you avoid television for the time being--right now there's a danger that you might be shown images of suffering and death. Something to do with people abandoned for days without food and water in cities laid waste by an act of god while Mr. Cheney enjoyed his vacation.

Actually, it's probably not going to be safe for a some time, there's still that war thing--they might show a picture of an Iraqi child with her limbs blown off or something by those pesky WMD-hiding freedom-haters. And those child-sodomy Abu Gharib videos could pop up without warning anytime.

I just hope we can remember that the most important thing is to be polite and maintain decorum, and above all else, to not use that word of mass destruction, the f-bomb. We have to think of the children, after all.
posted by cytherea at 9:05 PM on September 8, 2005

It is my considered opinion that history would in the future, and would have in the past, turned out immeasurably for the better if every leader of every nation the world has ever known had, at the height of his power, gotten his personal ass completely kicked, with no chance of avoidance or retribution.

Failing that, an unbridled, expletive-soaked reaming from an ordinary constituent once a week, otherwise unscheduled and unannounced, applied to all leaders of all affiliation and indeed all types, would be roundly beneficial and salutary.

Yeah, I'm for.
posted by furiousthought at 9:08 PM on September 8, 2005

I was glad to hear those heartening words directed towards one who so knowingly disheartens the lives of many. A nice little 'Uff Da'. Well played, sir ! ! !
posted by mk1gti at 9:23 PM on September 8, 2005

Actually, it's probably not going to be safe for a some time, there's still that war thing--they might show a picture of an Iraqi child with her limbs blown off or something by those pesky WMD-hiding freedom-haters. And those child-sodomy Abu Gharib videos could pop up without warning anytime.

Indeed. How kind of our Department of Defense to cater to the delicate sensibilities of the likes of esquire by refusing to allow photographs of the respectful treatment of the caskets of Americans who have given their lives in Iraq.
posted by Vidiot at 9:25 PM on September 8, 2005

So....I wanna know who the person in question was -- and was he arrested? Under what charge? It definitely sounds as if he was being hauled away.
posted by Vidiot at 9:26 PM on September 8, 2005

I'd happily volunteer to kick Bush in the nuts once a week.

vidiot, I was wondering the same thing actually. I wonder if ol' Dicky's not getting medieval on his ass. Actually, that's not really a happy thought. Bunnies, bunnies, fluffy bunnies. Look at the fluffy bunny, don't look over there. Fluffy bunnies, bunnies so fluffy, fluffy bunnies.
posted by fenriq at 9:30 PM on September 8, 2005

How long until Cheney just erupts like Joe Pantoliano in Midnight Run: "Everybody's telling me to go fuck myself!"

What kind of balls does it take for someone who was AWOL during the entire torturous episode to show up just in time to dole out the reconstruction contracts.
posted by any major dude at 9:34 PM on September 8, 2005

*smiles*
posted by matteo at 9:34 PM on September 8, 2005

yeah, I really want to know if the guy was arrested. Because, as far as I can tell, it's still protected political speech.
posted by Vidiot at 9:35 PM on September 8, 2005

(the fluffy bunnies made me smile, not Pantoliano line. just so you know). I liked Pantoliano in Bound, though
posted by matteo at 9:35 PM on September 8, 2005

He's probably in the same etiquette camp as the woman who suggested Ms. Rice might be able to make better use of her time than shoe shopping. How rude!

(Anyone know exactly what she said, btw?)
posted by cytherea at 9:58 PM on September 8, 2005

"How dare you shop for shoes while thousands are dying and homeless!"
posted by maryh at 10:06 PM on September 8, 2005

Another quote:

"I hate people when they're not polite"
posted by davy at 10:36 PM on September 8, 2005

The camera remains on Cheney while we hear scuffling in the background...Laughter ensues from the VP and reporters.

It's funny because he was hauled off and beaten to a pulp.

I wonder if they charged him with anything.

Hell, I've been enough of an asshole in my life I expect someone to shout that at me more than a few times.
Cheney? He got off lucky.
posted by Smedleyman at 2:55 AM on September 9, 2005

I call 'shopped on the hung Cheny picture.
posted by recursive at 8:43 AM on September 9, 2005

* uhh, "Cheney picture".
posted by recursive at 9:12 AM on September 9, 2005

Buy the video on eBay!
(also has excellent personal comentary by the explitive shouter himself)
posted by numlok at 3:09 PM on September 9, 2005

of course the guy was charged--you don't mess with their staged theatricals.
posted by amberglow at 3:22 PM on September 9, 2005

Dr Ben Marble who told Cheney to go F*ck Himself Lost his Home in Katrina, Detained, Cuffed by Cheney's M-16-carrying Goons - via Google News
posted by roboto at 5:09 PM on September 9, 2005

also, his website - hurricanekatrinasucked.com
posted by roboto at 5:13 PM on September 9, 2005

But Smedleyman, the difference is you're not a rich bastard with political power. We could heckle you and not be gulagized.
posted by davy at 6:31 PM on September 9, 2005

Actually amberglow, Dr. Marble's website says he was NOT charged or even beaten up, just "checked out" by gun-toting goons.

No doubt it helped that he made his point and then walked quietly and calmly away, so they might have figured out he wasn't threatening Cheney really. It also didn't hurt that he talked to reporters before he heckled Cheney, so they'd know who he is and why he was there -- that he's not just some "lone nut".
posted by davy at 6:56 PM on September 9, 2005

oh, sorry.

Ebay removed the video
posted by amberglow at 7:56 PM on September 9, 2005

/derail
We could heckle you and not be gulagized.

Well....not gulagized. No.
(I keep expecting the karma from my misspent youth to bite me on the ass, so I'm a bit...jumpy)
Hmmm....a heckler in life. Hmmm... "Nice park job, asshole!" "How long you plan to spend in the can? Eat a salad once in a while jerk!"

Yeah, that'd work.

/back on
So Marble, who was wearing an old Mr. T "I Pity Da Fool" t-shirt...

You couldn't create a story like that. Brilliant.

I disagree with the "land of the free" derision. He was let go. He didn't break any laws. They just had to check him out, which makes sense. Maybe he did want to hurt him. They have to do the dance.
Of course, It probably really helps that he's a physician.
And I agree that perhaps Cheney’s goons wouldn't have just let Marble go after 20 minutes if it hadn't been for the media nearby.
posted by Smedleyman at 11:19 PM on September 9, 2005

we must be eloquently impolite, if you know what I'm saying.

Depends on the "we". Eloquent debate in the media + "fuck you!" from so many average Joe's that it starts getting difficult to produce a town hall without them...
posted by dreamsign at 9:46 AM on September 10, 2005