Comments on: A Better World, One Beer at a Time

A Better World, One Beer at a Time

fenriq — Tue, 13 Sep 2005 11:14:05 -0800

Pouring a Perfect Pint Faster
Foam does not taste good, foamy beer is bad beer. The TurboTap makes pouring a perfect beer easy and fast by using fluid mechanics even if it does look a little like an unclipped you-know-what. And its not just faster, it saves beer and makes for better profit margins. See it in action (QT video at PopSci site, more on TurboTap's site) and prepare to be impressed.

By: pmbuko

pmbuko — Tue, 13 Sep 2005 11:27:31 -0800

I think I'm in love.

By: TheOnlyCoolTim

TheOnlyCoolTim — Tue, 13 Sep 2005 11:28:03 -0800

Beer is supposed to have a head. If this thing eliminates it entirely, that's not really any good. Unless you're drinking Bud Lite.

By: brautigan

brautigan — Tue, 13 Sep 2005 11:35:19 -0800

Looks like you still get a head though. I was pretty cynical till I saw the videos. Uk supplier please!?

By: [expletive deleted]

[expletive deleted] — Tue, 13 Sep 2005 11:37:44 -0800

Well, if this is as good as they say it is, you can expect these to pop up everywhere.

By: scruss

scruss — Tue, 13 Sep 2005 11:37:49 -0800

Eww, that thing puts way too much froth on the beer. But then, I'm a Scottish real ale drinker, so flat and ambient temperature is the way to go.

By: Plutor

Plutor — Tue, 13 Sep 2005 11:38:08 -0800

An unclipped I-don't-know-what. It looks like an extra long beer tap. TOCT, it doesn't explicitly say so anywhere, but here they refer to "the correct collar of foam". Sounds like my kinda party.

By: Exad

Exad — Tue, 13 Sep 2005 11:44:11 -0800

Seen it on TV. Wasn't impressed that you have to 'rent' them from the manufacturer.

By: RustyBrooks

RustyBrooks — Tue, 13 Sep 2005 11:44:55 -0800

How exactly does it increase keg yields? (15-30% is what they claim)

By: nofundy

nofundy — Tue, 13 Sep 2005 11:45:05 -0800

Paging jonmc! Beer thread! How would one ever drink a Guiness if head on a beer is bad?

By: fenriq

fenriq — Tue, 13 Sep 2005 11:49:52 -0800

nofundy, I was quite tempted to make the page title "Paging JonMC, Paging JonMC, please pick up your pint and report to thread #45091". RustyBrooks, my guess is that the tap reduces waste by not having to overfill glasses to get more beer and less foam. I have had to pour out pitcher after pitcher of beer on a new keg before because it was too shaken up during the changing process. The speed of the pours in the head to head contest is pretty amazing though I would guess, cynically, that the regular tap is a little monkeyed with to pour more slowly.

By: schoolgirl report

schoolgirl report — Tue, 13 Sep 2005 11:50:56 -0800

RustyBrooks, I would assume the savings is due in part to vendors not having to top off or overflow the cup to fill it properly.

By: brundlefly

brundlefly — Tue, 13 Sep 2005 11:51:31 -0800

My great grandfather always gave bartenders a hard time, saying he wanted the foam on the bottom. If this thing can't do that, I'm not interested.

By: Brian James

Brian James — Tue, 13 Sep 2005 11:54:22 -0800

They probably increase the pressure on the turbotap-equipped kegs, because the device delivers the beer to the bottom of the pint, so the head doesn't keep increasing. If you did that same pressure increase on a "regular" tap, the beer would come blasting out, creating a huge head, splashing all over etc.

By: elwoodwiles

elwoodwiles — Tue, 13 Sep 2005 11:55:43 -0800

Hmmm, a well built and maintained tap system shouldn't blow foam into every pint. New kegs, however, are always a problem and I don't see how this gadget will fix that. I'll pass.

By: robocop is bleeding

robocop is bleeding — Tue, 13 Sep 2005 12:05:04 -0800

Where were you two months ago!!?? Of course, a 99 buck a year lease for a home draft system is nutso. Even with the foamage, I was paying much less per oz of foaming Smuttynose beer than I would have if I bought it by the case.

By: bap98189

bap98189 — Tue, 13 Sep 2005 12:12:40 -0800

That is not beer. That is mass produced, gassy, tasteless crap. Beer should not be full of gas, it should be flat and pulled out of the keg using a conventional hand pump!

By: lalochezia

lalochezia — Tue, 13 Sep 2005 12:12:49 -0800

Your fluid dynamics trickery is useless - here.

By: cytherea

cytherea — Tue, 13 Sep 2005 12:13:51 -0800

Unless you allow the beer to foam, you're going to wind up with all that air in your stomach. You also need to leave a half-inch or so of foam at the top in order prevent the aromatic components from escaping too quickly.

By: uncle harold

uncle harold — Tue, 13 Sep 2005 12:18:09 -0800

Foam does not taste good, foamy beer is bad beer. As a connoisseur of all things malt and hops, I think I have never felt stronger disagreement. o-m-g what sacrilege.

By: funambulist

funambulist — Tue, 13 Sep 2005 12:22:22 -0800

Good things come to those who wait...

By: MetaJohn

MetaJohn — Tue, 13 Sep 2005 12:28:12 -0800

Oh I love head. But tis better to receive than to give.

By: nofundy

nofundy — Tue, 13 Sep 2005 12:30:17 -0800

I agree with uncle harold (but didn't want to offend fenriq or intimate he isn't entitled to his opinion.)

By: fenriq

fenriq — Tue, 13 Sep 2005 12:37:48 -0800

nofundy, aww, that's sweet! First pint's on me! And you can have as much foam as you want. I'll stand by my belief that a glass of foam can not ever taste anywhere near as good as a glass of beer. And yes, a little foam is desired but a controlled amount makes for a better glass.

By: uncle harold

uncle harold — Tue, 13 Sep 2005 12:41:35 -0800

nofundy: I don't think anyone is going to be offended - Bashing the beer taste of other people is like bashing the other soccer team. It's semi-serious in a fun way, but in the end all are soccer fans.

By: nofundy

nofundy — Tue, 13 Sep 2005 12:44:01 -0800

Well, if you're buying, make mine a Guinness in an ice cold mug please. We'll talk about all those losers [shhh, don't tell!] in Mefi while sipping our beverage.

By: costas

costas — Tue, 13 Sep 2005 12:44:39 -0800

As a fluid dynamicist by training, I gotta say this is brilliant; a nozzle designed to maintain laminar flow and decrease speed. I just wish they had a video of the conception of the idea (over a good pint I am sure)...

By: beelzbubba

beelzbubba — Tue, 13 Sep 2005 13:02:49 -0800

Although I was impressed, I think I would stick with the old method. There is just no way I could drink 10 beers in one minute.

By: nylon

nylon — Tue, 13 Sep 2005 13:07:55 -0800

Interesting stuff. In the business lounge at Kansai airport, they've got automatic beer dispensing machines that pour perfect glasses of Asahi. You put a glass on a small shelf, press the GO! button, and watch in mouth-watering admiration as the glass is robotically tipped back slightly to the optimum pouring angle while the tap gives forth its sweet sweet liquid at the optimum flow rate, the beerstream hitting the inclined glass wall in the optimum area. When the glass is almost full, the shelf slowly returns to the level, the tap shuts off, and your beer is ready to drink, complete with the optimum head. It's a miracle of modern engineering. First time I used the machine I made the mistake of loading it with a juice glass, which is smaller than the beer glass. As there's no glass recognition system in the dispenser, it went about its happy business until the precious liquid gushed over the sides of the glass and onto the counter. I was pretty quick to act, but so were three smiling lounge attendants, who all ran from different areas of the lounge to assist in the clean up job.

By: fenriq

fenriq — Tue, 13 Sep 2005 13:21:04 -0800

beelzbubba, there's a time and a place for everything and the time and place for drinking ten beers in a minute is called College. Nofundy, I like a Guinness quite a bit as well but I'm quite enamored of Sam Smith's Oatmeal Stout right now, its like a meal in a bottle! But if I'm out drinking at the bars, I will usually stick with mixed drinks as I hate having to pee every five minutes after a few beers.

By: hal9k

hal9k — Tue, 13 Sep 2005 13:33:31 -0800

Hell if I knew it was going to be this kind of party I'd a stuck my dick in a pint of Guinness

By: Smart Dalek

Smart Dalek — Tue, 13 Sep 2005 13:39:01 -0800

I hate those things. I ordered Negra Modello from one, and it gave me a 12 oz. bottle.

By: sixpack

sixpack — Tue, 13 Sep 2005 13:50:08 -0800

Beer should not be full of gas, it should be flat and pulled out of the keg using a conventional hand pump! That's wrong on a couple of counts. First, CAMRA's definition of "real ale" does not proscribe gas. Gas, or rather carbon dioxide, is the natural product (along with alcohol) of yeast fermentation. After real ale is placed in a closed cask, it continues to ferment under pressure and, thus, produce bubbly -- some ales are more lively than others. It's the artificial introduction of CO-2 into classic English ale that CAMRA opposes. Secondly, surely CAMRA wouldn't object to foam in other styles of beer since their flavor is often enhanced by a decent head. German and Austrian lagers, for example, are properly served with foam. The same goes for many Belgian ales which, without a decent level of gas, would taste too heavy. Indeed, some Belgian beer glasses (tulip-shaped) are designed to produce and then control foaming during the pour. That said, expect so see more innovation in tap handles. Fosters is marketing the HIT Tap, with two separate spouts -- one to pour the beer, the second to add foam.

By: fishfucker

fishfucker — Tue, 13 Sep 2005 14:10:57 -0800

in the video, it kinda looked like the guy with the conventional tap was half-assing it, just a little. I mean, he didn't exactly seem to be speedy about getting another glass under the tap.

By: robocop is bleeding

robocop is bleeding — Tue, 13 Sep 2005 14:11:22 -0800

Also, if anyone is in the Boston area and going to The Boston Beer Summit Oktoberfest, drop me a line!

By: freq

freq — Tue, 13 Sep 2005 14:19:40 -0800

They put this stuff into bottles @ 800+ per minute @ the brewery. Sorry, i'm not impressed :)

By: NinjaPirate

NinjaPirate — Tue, 13 Sep 2005 14:24:56 -0800

You don't need technology to pull a good pint, you just have to care.

By: pompomtom

pompomtom — Tue, 13 Sep 2005 14:42:02 -0800

So they build the perfect beer tap, and then use it with plastic cups??? (also, the amount of head depends on the beer... pour me a flat-top Hoegaarden and I'm leaving.)

By: slogger

slogger — Tue, 13 Sep 2005 15:14:59 -0800

head? who said head? i'll take some of that!

By: wilful

wilful — Tue, 13 Sep 2005 16:41:34 -0800

I-still-dont-know-what it looks like an unclipped one of.

By: StickyCarpet

StickyCarpet — Tue, 13 Sep 2005 16:43:21 -0800

the guy with the conventional tap was half-assing it His row of beer glasses seems to be further away from the tap than the other.

By: fenriq

fenriq — Tue, 13 Sep 2005 17:01:13 -0800

wilful, then I would guess you are circumsized.

By: wilful

wilful — Tue, 13 Sep 2005 18:13:49 -0800

Oh a PENIS! (Is that a rude word? Excessive prudery) Doesn't look like one to me, but I don't have them on the mind!

By: Decani

Decani — Tue, 13 Sep 2005 18:38:04 -0800

Just one thing: if it ain't a hand pump, it ain't ever going to be a perfect pint.

By: Decani

Decani — Tue, 13 Sep 2005 18:38:55 -0800

I meant to add... /Brit real ale snob

By: SweetJesus

SweetJesus — Tue, 13 Sep 2005 22:54:26 -0800

Brewing kills the essence of the beer's ingredients, turing once beautiful hops, barley and wheat into some sort of dark, acrid sludge. All true beer lovers consume the materials raw, and ferment them internally.

By: biffa

biffa — Wed, 14 Sep 2005 02:36:49 -0800

Just one thing: if it ain't a hand pump, it ain't ever going to be a perfect pint. Even CAMRA accepts gas-assisted pumps as long as the gas doesn't come into contact with the beer.

By: cstross

cstross — Wed, 14 Sep 2005 02:56:59 -0800

I should note that the traditional Scottish tall fount is gas-assisted, sort-of -- but not bottled compressed gas, and it seems to be kosher per CAMRA rules: IIRC it uses a low-pressure line to suck the beer up out of the cellar, rather than pumping under pressure (which dissolves the propellant gas in the liquid, altering its flavour). But, to get back to the topic in hand: this device is pointless. If they went back to drinking proper real ale over in the USA, they could get flat, headless pints whenever they wanted by removing the sparkler from the swan-neck. (The sparkler is a 10 pence piece of plastic that screws onto the end of the swan-neck tube on a hand pump and acts as a spray head. If your bitter or Scottish-style IPA or 80/- or whatever has too much foam on top, try asking the bar staff to loosen the sparkler a bit. Works wonders. If they look at you blankly or ask "what's a sparkler?" you're drinking in the wrong pub -- they don't know enough to keep or serve the beer in good condition.)

By: Decani

Decani — Wed, 14 Sep 2005 04:22:30 -0800

Even CAMRA accepts gas-assisted pumps as long as the gas doesn't come into contact with the beer. CAMRA also accepts fat blokes in absurd knitted sweaters. Unlike CAMRA, I accept neither. :-)

By: biffa

biffa — Wed, 14 Sep 2005 05:32:48 -0800

I don't believe you would be able to make any distinction.

By: nofundy

nofundy — Wed, 14 Sep 2005 06:28:31 -0800

SweetJesus wins.