George Bush needs to go pee.

September 15, 2005 10:45 AM

George Bush passes notes. (SFW Photo.) Take a look at what he's writing.

Reuters Caption: U.S. President George W. Bush writes a note to Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice during a Security Council meeting at the 2005 World Summit and 60th General Assembly of the United Nations in New York September 14, 2005. World leaders are exploring ways to revitalize the United Nations at a summit on Wednesday but their blueprint falls short of Secretary-General Kofi Annan's vision of freedom from want, persecution and war.
posted by clgregor (319 comments total)

Dude.
posted by Optimus Chyme at 10:51 AM on September 15, 2005

Posted yesterday.
posted by cerebus19 at 10:51 AM on September 15, 2005

Last comment before deletion, game on
posted by poppo at 10:52 AM on September 15, 2005

[stop the insanity]
posted by SteelyDuran at 10:52 AM on September 15, 2005

Posted yesterday.

And Today.
posted by ursus_comiter at 10:53 AM on September 15, 2005

Last one right here!
posted by poppo at 10:53 AM on September 15, 2005

Ya-huh?
posted by cillit bang at 10:53 AM on September 15, 2005

I think I MAY NEED to CHECK the front page?
IS this POSSIBLE
posted by Plutor at 10:54 AM on September 15, 2005

WTF?
posted by jefgodesky at 10:54 AM on September 15, 2005

No this is the last comment before deletion
posted by poppo at 10:54 AM on September 15, 2005

I need to go wee... WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

Thanks. Much better.
posted by terrapin at 10:54 AM on September 15, 2005

No this is the last comment before deletion
posted by poppo at 10:54 AM PST on September 15

quoting last comment
posted by Optimus Chyme at 10:54 AM on September 15, 2005

Last comment before deletion
posted by poppo at 10:54 AM on September 15, 2005

Jesus. Is this the third or fouth time that link has been posted...
posted by jperkins at 10:55 AM on September 15, 2005

Fourth. Last comment
posted by poppo at 10:55 AM on September 15, 2005

And tomorrow, too. Nine godzillion times. And it isn't that funny, and it's sure not that important. Meanwhile...
posted by SteelyDuran at 10:55 AM on September 15, 2005

No SteelyDuran, I will have the last comment before deletion
posted by poppo at 10:55 AM on September 15, 2005

Good nick by the way
posted by poppo at 10:56 AM on September 15, 2005

.
posted by fire&wings at 10:56 AM on September 15, 2005

No fire&wings, the honor will be mine
posted by poppo at 10:56 AM on September 15, 2005

Shit. You seen this?
posted by jperkins at 10:56 AM on September 15, 2005

Get your war on.

This note, it vibrates?
posted by pardonyou? at 10:56 AM on September 15, 2005

War over, I win
posted by poppo at 10:56 AM on September 15, 2005

Good morning, good afternoon, good ni..
posted by KevinSkomsvold at 10:57 AM on September 15, 2005

I have to pee right now.
posted by robocop is bleeding at 10:58 AM on September 15, 2005

No Kevin, this is the last last comment before deletion
posted by poppo at 10:58 AM on September 15, 2005

The last comment shall be mine, sirs!
posted by reklaw at 10:58 AM on September 15, 2005

And the last word is ... MINE!
posted by monju_bosatsu at 10:58 AM on September 15, 2005

End of life issues for this thread aside...

It may have gone something like this.
posted by ervan at 10:58 AM on September 15, 2005

No, it is mine
posted by poppo at 10:58 AM on September 15, 2005

Damn you!
posted by KevinSkomsvold at 10:58 AM on September 15, 2005

Now is a good time to talk about the HAARP menace that threatens all of us.
posted by Optimus Chyme at 10:58 AM on September 15, 2005

Do not try to distract me with your links ervan
posted by poppo at 10:58 AM on September 15, 2005

Where's the "Are you fucking kidding me?" flag when you really need it?
posted by kyleg at 10:58 AM on September 15, 2005

yay
posted by machaus at 10:58 AM on September 15, 2005

No, last comment
posted by poppo at 10:59 AM on September 15, 2005

I'm in this game.
posted by mystyk at 10:59 AM on September 15, 2005

You fools, it shall be mine!
posted by monju_bosatsu at 10:59 AM on September 15, 2005

Take 2.
posted by mystyk at 10:59 AM on September 15, 2005

No, I have put you out of it before you were in it
posted by poppo at 10:59 AM on September 15, 2005

You couldn't comment your way out of a wet paper sack, poppo.
posted by sciurus at 10:59 AM on September 15, 2005

You know, this says a lot about the community.
posted by mystyk at 10:59 AM on September 15, 2005

We thought it would be funny to sign GW up for an account at pissguzzlinggrannies.org. Roll that tape Hal!
posted by KevinSkomsvold at 10:59 AM on September 15, 2005

i have already commented my way out of it and into yours and out again
posted by poppo at 11:00 AM on September 15, 2005

Bush sure has to piss a lot.
posted by wakko at 11:00 AM on September 15, 2005

You all think you can take me?
posted by reklaw at 11:00 AM on September 15, 2005

this is the last comm...
posted by Floydd at 11:00 AM on September 15, 2005

poppo, you already won once today. Share the glory.
posted by pardonyou? at 11:00 AM on September 15, 2005

no, pardonyou, i am so so greedy
posted by poppo at 11:00 AM on September 15, 2005

This is one of the few things where being last is better.
posted by mystyk at 11:00 AM on September 15, 2005

Quadruple post? Jesus.
posted by jonson at 11:00 AM on September 15, 2005

but happy you saw the other one ;)
posted by poppo at 11:00 AM on September 15, 2005

No more for you, poppo.
posted by monju_bosatsu at 11:00 AM on September 15, 2005

How many you think we'll get up to?
posted by mystyk at 11:01 AM on September 15, 2005

In it ta' win it!

/oh, and terrible job not seeing the previous thread, as it was the top FPP up until it was removed, which you then replaced with the same thing.
posted by NationalKato at 11:01 AM on September 15, 2005

"No, I did not ask for a potty break from that woman."
posted by George_Spiggott at 11:01 AM on September 15, 2005

monju, you lose to this, the last comment
posted by poppo at 11:01 AM on September 15, 2005

posted by sciurus at 11:01 AM on September 15, 2005

brb
posted by maggieb at 11:01 AM on September 15, 2005

Tags:

batshitinsane
posted by pardonyou? at 11:01 AM on September 15, 2005

is this vibrating president something i would have to own a tv to know about?
posted by psychobum at 11:01 AM on September 15, 2005

not
posted by ursus_comiter at 11:01 AM on September 15, 2005

then you will lose maggibe
posted by poppo at 11:01 AM on September 15, 2005

MetaFilter: You too can play comment wars.
posted by mystyk at 11:01 AM on September 15, 2005

*dramatic dive for glory*
posted by reklaw at 11:01 AM on September 15, 2005

Ok guys, enough with the good-natured ribbing - you're scaring the internets.
posted by KevinSkomsvold at 11:01 AM on September 15, 2005

Tra lalalalalalalalalalalalalala. Bush has bodily functions and writes notes, hahahhahahahahahahahahahahahaha. Why isn't he a perfect robot like I am hahahahahahahaha.

Mandy has pink pants on, those are so last year. Where's my ball?
posted by 517 at 11:01 AM on September 15, 2005

last comment before deletion
posted by poppo at 11:01 AM on September 15, 2005

can't wait for the comment count to exceed any other FPP in mefi history...
posted by jperkins at 11:02 AM on September 15, 2005

Who would have thought that Bush taking a leak would create so much unadulterated joy?
posted by reklaw at 11:02 AM on September 15, 2005

no, you can, last comment
posted by poppo at 11:02 AM on September 15, 2005

. for this post
posted by stevil at 11:02 AM on September 15, 2005

This comment is history!
posted by schmedeman at 11:02 AM on September 15, 2005

We are so gonna get in trouble for this...
posted by KevinSkomsvold at 11:02 AM on September 15, 2005

Haha. when this is done I will hack the server and make mine the last comment. Then matt will add hios own to show me up.
posted by mystyk at 11:02 AM on September 15, 2005

.
posted by monju_bosatsu at 11:02 AM on September 15, 2005

just kidding you stevil! this is actually the last one
posted by poppo at 11:02 AM on September 15, 2005

starting now.
posted by fandango_matt at 11:02 AM on September 15, 2005

How long can this go?
posted by mystyk at 11:03 AM on September 15, 2005

goatse
posted by sciurus at 11:03 AM on September 15, 2005

no, starting now
posted by poppo at 11:03 AM on September 15, 2005

maybe this won't actually get deleted for like hours
posted by reklaw at 11:03 AM on September 15, 2005

not long my friend, since this is the last comment
posted by poppo at 11:03 AM on September 15, 2005

And we'll all be typing like idiots all afternoon.
posted by monju_bosatsu at 11:03 AM on September 15, 2005

Did anyone actually flag it? Or did it degenerate to this without that step?
posted by mystyk at 11:03 AM on September 15, 2005

Dude, jperkins - they fucked that old lady UP!! Damn straight they did.
posted by billysumday at 11:03 AM on September 15, 2005

poppo sux
posted by reklaw at 11:03 AM on September 15, 2005

I like pie.
posted by grateful at 11:03 AM on September 15, 2005

...
posted by ursus_comiter at 11:03 AM on September 15, 2005

i haven't flagged it
posted by poppo at 11:03 AM on September 15, 2005

I did.
posted by ursus_comiter at 11:04 AM on September 15, 2005

Did someone say pie?
posted by reklaw at 11:04 AM on September 15, 2005

I flagged it.
posted by monju_bosatsu at 11:04 AM on September 15, 2005

LOLLAFFO!!!!1111 Would comment again A+ post!!!!
posted by KevinSkomsvold at 11:04 AM on September 15, 2005

PIE!
posted by monju_bosatsu at 11:04 AM on September 15, 2005

I'll buy the winner a beer (assuming proper age) if they come to Vegas.
posted by mystyk at 11:04 AM on September 15, 2005

do not be jealous of this, the last comment
posted by poppo at 11:04 AM on September 15, 2005

I want to feel included.
posted by Clay201 at 11:04 AM on September 15, 2005

Dude, jperkins - they fucked that old lady UP!! Damn straight they did.

Fascists. Last week it was the guns and now they're manhandling 60 yr old grandmothers.
posted by jperkins at 11:04 AM on September 15, 2005

you are included despite losing to this last comment
posted by poppo at 11:05 AM on September 15, 2005

Or other single beverage of their choice.
posted by mystyk at 11:05 AM on September 15, 2005

poppo has posted no links 143 comments to MetaFilter [in this thread]
posted by monju_bosatsu at 11:05 AM on September 15, 2005

or a nice cool drink of last comment
posted by poppo at 11:05 AM on September 15, 2005

P


R


O


F


I


T

!
posted by KevinSkomsvold at 11:05 AM on September 15, 2005

I regret nothing!!!
posted by schmedeman at 11:06 AM on September 15, 2005

So let me get this straight... This president, he urinates?
posted by crunchland at 11:06 AM on September 15, 2005

ha ha ha is that your last comment monu, because then you will lose
posted by poppo at 11:06 AM on September 15, 2005

poppo is so on my friends list thingy
posted by reklaw at 11:06 AM on September 15, 2005

100 posts in 20 minutes! Impressive.
posted by brain_drain at 11:06 AM on September 15, 2005

The reason he needed to ask Condi is because she has to come with him and handle the aiming.
posted by George_Spiggott at 11:06 AM on September 15, 2005

I think you're all wasting your time. Surely I will prevail.
posted by mystyk at 11:06 AM on September 15, 2005

He didn't say it was #1.
posted by monju_bosatsu at 11:06 AM on September 15, 2005

you lose
posted by sciurus at 11:06 AM on September 15, 2005

LAST POST!
posted by reklaw at 11:06 AM on September 15, 2005

Mmmmm, pie.
posted by grateful at 11:06 AM on September 15, 2005

LAST LAST POST!
posted by monju_bosatsu at 11:06 AM on September 15, 2005

No, this is the last comment all my friends
posted by poppo at 11:07 AM on September 15, 2005

Awesome, can someone else post this again when the thread gets closed?
posted by OmieWise at 11:07 AM on September 15, 2005

So I hear there was some sort of hurricane or something. Does anyone know anything about it?
posted by prak at 11:07 AM on September 15, 2005

mystyk, with this comment I will win and take you up on your offer next time I'm in Sin City.
posted by pardonyou? at 11:07 AM on September 15, 2005

Please flag this post. ty
posted by maggieb at 11:07 AM on September 15, 2005

posted by sciurus at 11:07 AM on September 15, 2005

How many posts do you all think we can hit? 200? 300? Any wagers?
posted by mystyk at 11:07 AM on September 15, 2005

Yes, I will if I can get make the last comment before deletion
posted by poppo at 11:07 AM on September 15, 2005

200 easy.
posted by monju_bosatsu at 11:07 AM on September 15, 2005

So, Bush had to go #2 and he was at the UN and...
posted by jperkins at 11:07 AM on September 15, 2005

In before the lock!
posted by LarryC at 11:08 AM on September 15, 2005

Well, even if they're fascists, they're ok with news agencies filming their behavior. What interesting times we live in.
posted by billysumday at 11:08 AM on September 15, 2005

LAST POST, INFINITY!
posted by mr.curmudgeon at 11:08 AM on September 15, 2005

he made the last comment on that piece of paper before it was deleted
posted by poppo at 11:08 AM on September 15, 2005

Sprinting out onto the field, a dark horse for the win!
posted by soyjoy at 11:08 AM on September 15, 2005

You guys are gonna make me pee myself.
posted by grateful at 11:08 AM on September 15, 2005

what?
posted by yhbc at 11:08 AM on September 15, 2005

Longest post EVAR!!! (ok, maybe not, but its on its way)
posted by mystyk at 11:08 AM on September 15, 2005

This may set a new record for number of comments in a single thread if it keeps up. I believe in you all! You can do it!

Before the deletion comes, I just want to say, it's been an honor to be part of this historic occasion. Now, I may need a bathroom break....
posted by jefgodesky at 11:08 AM on September 15, 2005

*gopher hole*
posted by sciurus at 11:09 AM on September 15, 2005

pipped at the post
posted by reklaw at 11:09 AM on September 15, 2005

Last
posted by poppo at 11:09 AM on September 15, 2005

Wait, what if I need a bathroom break before this thread closes?
posted by monju_bosatsu at 11:09 AM on September 15, 2005

Best fpp ever.
posted by wakko at 11:09 AM on September 15, 2005

As I said previously...

So these two penquins are standing next to each other in the mens room,

One says to the other "Why you look like you could be wearing a tuxedo."

To which the other says "Who says I'm not?"
posted by R. Mutt at 11:09 AM on September 15, 2005

Well, even if they're fascists, they're ok with news agencies filming their behavior.

That's the mark of a real fascist - when you're willing to tackle a sixty yr old lady for refusing to leaver her home. In front of a news crew.
posted by jperkins at 11:09 AM on September 15, 2005

I hear Bush wants to change "UN" to "BM"

Thank you! I'll be here all week! Try the veal!
posted by pardonyou? at 11:09 AM on September 15, 2005

You better go now. Hurry!
posted by lucien at 11:09 AM on September 15, 2005

I believe there is a very famous thread, #9622 that has the most comments ever
posted by poppo at 11:09 AM on September 15, 2005

There once was a man from nantuckett...
posted by mystyk at 11:09 AM on September 15, 2005

Clinton never peed...
posted by cusack at 11:09 AM on September 15, 2005

have i won yet?
posted by sciurus at 11:09 AM on September 15, 2005

We will not make that many, especially since this is the last comment
posted by poppo at 11:10 AM on September 15, 2005

* goes fer sciurus' hole also *
posted by yhbc at 11:10 AM on September 15, 2005

wtf
posted by prostyle at 11:10 AM on September 15, 2005

nope.
posted by monju_bosatsu at 11:10 AM on September 15, 2005

Garrison Keillor jokes are the mark of a real fascist...



...for the WIN!!!
posted by soyjoy at 11:10 AM on September 15, 2005

You don't get any bathroom breaks. You were supposed to have gone before we left.
posted by rand at 11:10 AM on September 15, 2005

Nice decoy, yhbc, but not good enough
posted by poppo at 11:10 AM on September 15, 2005

We're all just upping our contribution index.

1. Post continually in a doomed thread.
2. ???
3. Profit!
posted by mystyk at 11:10 AM on September 15, 2005

that tickles!
posted by sciurus at 11:10 AM on September 15, 2005

Matt's laughing his ass off at you people and your "last comment!"
posted by jperkins at 11:10 AM on September 15, 2005

we're going at like ten posts per minute here
posted by reklaw at 11:10 AM on September 15, 2005

EAT AT JOES
posted by psychobum at 11:10 AM on September 15, 2005

It's a good size, thanks.
posted by 517 at 11:10 AM on September 15, 2005

I do have this trash can next to my desk ...
posted by monju_bosatsu at 11:10 AM on September 15, 2005

It's a race! I am winning!
posted by Faint of Butt at 11:10 AM on September 15, 2005

I am Mrs. Maryam Abacha, the widow of the late Gen. Sanni Abacha former Nigeria Military Head of State who died mysteriously as a result of Cardiac Arrest. Since after my husband's death my family is under restriction of movement and that not withstanding, we are being molested, policed and our Bank Accounts both here and abroad are being frozen by the Nigerian Civilian Government. Furthermore, my living eldest son is in detention by the Nigerian Government for more interrogation about my husband's assets and some vital documents following the resent discovery of my husband's Swiss Bank Account in which the huge sum of US$700 Million and DM450 Million was logged. I therefore, decided to contact you in confidence through my lawyer Barrister Sule Kamal, since I have been able to move out the sum of US$30 Million Dollars somewhere abroad.
posted by killdevil at 11:10 AM on September 15, 2005

/me suddenly has an inspiration for her very first FPP......
posted by maggieb at 11:11 AM on September 15, 2005

...who saved all his piss in a bucket...
posted by wakko at 11:11 AM on September 15, 2005

you people are insane
posted by mrgrimm at 11:11 AM on September 15, 2005

posted by Plutor at 11:11 AM on September 15, 2005

No, you are going for ten a minute rek, i am only going for the last!
posted by poppo at 11:11 AM on September 15, 2005

there is an art to last posting, you know
posted by yhbc at 11:11 AM on September 15, 2005

We'll never make 500 5000.
posted by soyjoy at 11:11 AM on September 15, 2005

Mefites sure are heavy pot smokers.
posted by Gyan at 11:11 AM on September 15, 2005

I would like to just take this opportunity to get in on the action by making the last comment. Is that possible?
posted by Joey Michaels at 11:11 AM on September 15, 2005

What is the record for most posts in a single thread? I was under the impression it was at least a thousand.
posted by prak at 11:11 AM on September 15, 2005

I think this will be a classic. Perhaps he can close but not delete...
posted by mystyk at 11:11 AM on September 15, 2005

and this isn't it
posted by yhbc at 11:11 AM on September 15, 2005

whoa .... stars!
posted by R. Mutt at 11:11 AM on September 15, 2005

Still here?
posted by OmieWise at 11:11 AM on September 15, 2005

All the money are secretly defaced and are sealed in two metal Boxes for security reasons. Due to my experience in the hands of people. I have decided to do this with a totally new but trustworthy person who can keep this matter confidential. This is very important to me. It is to my consent here that my lawyer and I decided to personally appeal to you seriously and religiously for your urgent assistance to move this money into your country where I believe it will be safe since I cannot leave the country due to the restriction of movement imposed on the members of my family by the Nigerian Government. You can contact me through my lawyer s email address above and I shall get all document relating to the consignment changed to your name before delivery. Barrister Sule Kamal will on receipt of your response arrange with you for a face-to-face meeting outside Nigeria in order to liaise with you towards effective completion of this transactions. However, arrangements have been put in place to move this money out of the country in a secret vault through a security company, and as soon as you indicate your interest, my lawyer shall send you the Air-Way Bill of the luggage and other related document so that you can help to claim the luggage. Conclusively, we have agreed to offer you 25% of the total sum while 75% is to be held on trust by you for us until we can decide on a suitable business investment in your country upon our freedom. Please reply urgently and treat with absolute confidentiality and sincerity.

BEST REGARDS,

ARIAM ABACHA
posted by killdevil at 11:11 AM on September 15, 2005

... one day he drank it all down...
posted by sciurus at 11:12 AM on September 15, 2005

YOU WILL ALL FAIL IT
posted by reklaw at 11:12 AM on September 15, 2005

Still going strong.
posted by Faint of Butt at 11:12 AM on September 15, 2005

GOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAL!
posted by 517 at 11:12 AM on September 15, 2005

Meanwhile, here is a knitted bunny.
posted by bhance at 11:12 AM on September 15, 2005

Also, do we get some sort of prize if there are more comments on a deleted FPP than on the 9/11 thread?

BTW - last comment!
posted by Joey Michaels at 11:12 AM on September 15, 2005

This post has GOT to be a joke. Right? Right?
posted by Specklet at 11:12 AM on September 15, 2005

The Penultimate post. You go next.

BTW, Clinton tried peeing, but didn't like it. And when he peed,
none did bleed.
posted by Neologian at 11:12 AM on September 15, 2005

Whoa it is getting faster, last comment
posted by poppo at 11:12 AM on September 15, 2005

No way, dude. No way.
posted by Civil_Disobedient at 11:12 AM on September 15, 2005

We're right at about 200.
posted by mystyk at 11:12 AM on September 15, 2005

YOU ARE ALL EDUCATED STUPID.
posted by Faint of Butt at 11:12 AM on September 15, 2005

I like index cards.
posted by prak at 11:12 AM on September 15, 2005

who will be #200?
posted by jasper411 at 11:12 AM on September 15, 2005

Victory is mine!
posted by monju_bosatsu at 11:12 AM on September 15, 2005

monju, don't do it, you'll be just like Buch if you do. And then the terrorists win.
posted by OmieWise at 11:12 AM on September 15, 2005

Stop your bunny posting! It will not help you win!
posted by poppo at 11:12 AM on September 15, 2005

Some 1800 comments is a tall order ... but 150 in just 25 minutes? If Matt's like taking a nap or something, we'll beat that easy!
posted by jefgodesky at 11:13 AM on September 15, 2005

boobies
posted by yhbc at 11:13 AM on September 15, 2005

Just like Bush I meant.
posted by OmieWise at 11:13 AM on September 15, 2005

This is the second to last comment.
posted by grateful at 11:13 AM on September 15, 2005

snark
posted by jperkins at 11:13 AM on September 15, 2005

Dear Sir/Madam

I am the eldest son of the late Henri Obi Kabongo (a foremost human rights activist in the Democratic Republic of Congo). My father died in March 2000 as a result of the inhumane treatment meted out on him while in prison by the government of Laurent Kabila. However, it is particularly important to mention here that before the death of my father, he was a successful businessman and his business empire includes real estate, exportation, and consultancy services which cut across Africa. He was able to accumulate enough money both in local and foreign currencies through his business empire. In fact, he was at one time rated among the first five richest Congolese businessmen by one of the leading business magazines in my country. His entire business has been on the upward trend over the past ten years, bringing his net profit during the period under review to Twenty one million U.S dollars ($21,000,000). This of course does not include his assets which are already running into millions of dollars.
posted by killdevil at 11:13 AM on September 15, 2005

No boobies!
posted by poppo at 11:13 AM on September 15, 2005

200!
posted by monju_bosatsu at 11:13 AM on September 15, 2005

Hey everyone, Apple just released some new shiny toy thing. Go to apple.com instead to look! Leave the last post for me!
posted by reklaw at 11:13 AM on September 15, 2005

KHAAAAAAAAAN!!!
posted by mystyk at 11:13 AM on September 15, 2005

I got some pizza last night.
posted by sciurus at 11:13 AM on September 15, 2005

Do you need a hall pass to go pee at a UN Summit?
posted by Neologian at 11:13 AM on September 15, 2005

yhbc writes "boobies"

Don't distract.
posted by OmieWise at 11:13 AM on September 15, 2005

Does anyone read the posts down here?
posted by Faint of Butt at 11:13 AM on September 15, 2005

damn! i just missed post 200!
posted by jperkins at 11:13 AM on September 15, 2005

Last comment, I am serious
posted by poppo at 11:13 AM on September 15, 2005

now would be as good a time as any to tell you all about my pet invisible rock
posted by psychobum at 11:13 AM on September 15, 2005

posted by 517 at 11:13 AM on September 15, 2005

Having said all this, there was a twist in my father’s success story following his confrontation with the government of Laurent Kabila who has been quite high-handed and dictatorial in his policies and day-to-day running of the affairs of the Congolese people. My father being a human rights activist, criticised his government in both local and international newspapers. This infuriated him and he clamped my father in jail until he died in March last year due to ill health. Fortunately, before the arrest of my father, his attorney acting upon his instructions, transferred the sum of Twenty one million U.S dollars ($21,000,000) from his local banks to a security firm overseas. He did this for fear of this accounts being frozen by the government. Following my father’s death, my entire family decided to seek political assylum in Lome-Togo, as the eldest son of my late father and according to our tradition in Africa. I have now inherited all my father’s wealth.
posted by killdevil at 11:13 AM on September 15, 2005

!! ATTENTION !!

George bush has to urinate.
posted by wakko at 11:13 AM on September 15, 2005

So...did he ever got to go?
posted by rand at 11:13 AM on September 15, 2005

We all do!
posted by yhbc at 11:14 AM on September 15, 2005

scirius - a pizza pie?
posted by grateful at 11:14 AM on September 15, 2005

Sorry monju! grateful got 200....
posted by jasper411 at 11:14 AM on September 15, 2005

I think I MAY NEED TO POST? Is this POSSIBLE
posted by Keith Talent at 11:14 AM on September 15, 2005

517, nice try but not good enough!
posted by poppo at 11:14 AM on September 15, 2005

poppo writes "No boobies!"

You neither, neighbor.
posted by OmieWise at 11:14 AM on September 15, 2005

:
posted by prak at 11:14 AM on September 15, 2005

Little known fact: When Colin Powell was at the UN, he wrote a similar note:

I think all this STUFF
I'm saying May BE BULLshit
Is this possible?

[I win]
posted by pardonyou? at 11:14 AM on September 15, 2005

My cat's breath smells like pike.











...for the WINNNNNNN!!!!!
posted by soyjoy at 11:14 AM on September 15, 2005

um, read the posts down here, that is
posted by yhbc at 11:14 AM on September 15, 2005

.
posted by reklaw at 11:14 AM on September 15, 2005

Considering the present face-off between Kabila and my family, I was then advised by my father’s attorney (presently my attorney) to seek the assistance of someone based in your country to receive the amount in question being ($21,000,000). Since I have the intention of relocating my family there with the aim of settling down there and investing. I have decided to give you 5% of the total amount involved and I have also set aside 5% for any expenses that might be incurred in the course of this transaction. To finalize this transaction you will have to contact me via my e-mail address ([e-mail]). further discussions will be centered on how and when we shall be meet after the fund is in your account. I shall expect you to keep this transaction confidential due to the present circumstance of my family and I urgently await your response.
Yours faithfully
Peter Obi
posted by killdevil at 11:14 AM on September 15, 2005

Aaaand... LAST POST!
posted by Specklet at 11:14 AM on September 15, 2005

This is NOT THE LAst post?
posted by maggieb at 11:14 AM on September 15, 2005

Oh sure, now the server stays up.
posted by Armitage Shanks at 11:14 AM on September 15, 2005

do not be distracted by tiny milestones like post #, the winner puts in the last comment!
posted by poppo at 11:14 AM on September 15, 2005

Drink offer still open, but people who have the power to close the thread are not eligible.
posted by mystyk at 11:14 AM on September 15, 2005

killdevil is a spammer!
posted by OmieWise at 11:15 AM on September 15, 2005

This is a pretty feeble attempt to get your Metafilter Contribution Index up.
posted by Civil_Disobedient at 11:15 AM on September 15, 2005

Bowling for last comment!
posted by poppo at 11:15 AM on September 15, 2005

I like the knitted bunny.
posted by LarryC at 11:15 AM on September 15, 2005

poppo, you have won 10 million dinars. click here to claim your prize!
posted by sciurus at 11:15 AM on September 15, 2005

spammer is a killdevil!
posted by yhbc at 11:15 AM on September 15, 2005

This is the end.....
posted by zeoslap at 11:15 AM on September 15, 2005

The UN has no funding for bathrooms!
posted by R. Mutt at 11:15 AM on September 15, 2005

Whoever does wind up winning, should get a car or something. I'm completely serious.
posted by soyjoy at 11:15 AM on September 15, 2005

Does it even count when the thread is deleted after you last comment?
posted by poppo at 11:15 AM on September 15, 2005

And if somehow I win, I'll drink myself silly.
posted by mystyk at 11:15 AM on September 15, 2005

"And the last shall be first."
posted by OmieWise at 11:15 AM on September 15, 2005

yes pie. i like pie.
posted by sciurus at 11:16 AM on September 15, 2005

DEAR SIR,

FIRSTLY I MUST FIRST SOLICIT YOUR CONFIDENCE IN THIS TRANSACTION; THIS BY VIRTUE OF ITS NATURE AS BEEN INTERLY CONFIDENTIAL AND TOP SECRET THOUGH KNOW THAT A TRANSACTION OF THIS MAGNITUDE WILL MAKE SOMEONE APPREHENSIVE AND ELATED BUT I AM ASSURING YOU THAT ALL WILL BE WELL AT THE END OF THE DAY. I HAVE DECIDED TO CONTACT YOU DUE TO THE URGENCY OF THIS TRANSACTION AS WE HAVE BEEN RELIABLY INFORMED OF YOU DISCRETNESS AND ABILITY TO HANDLE TRANSACTION OF THIS NATURE.

LET ME START BY INTRODUCING MYSELF PROPERLY , I AM MR. TIJANI YUSUFU CREDIT OFFFICER WITH THE UNION BANK OF NIGERIA PLC (UBA) BENIN BRANCH, I CAME TO KNOW OF YOU IN MY PRIVATE SEARCH FOR A RELIABLE AND REPUTABLE PERSON TO HANDLE THIS CONFIDENTIAL TRANSACTION,WHICH INVOLVES TRANSFERING HUGE SUM OF MONEY TO A FOREIGN ACCOUNT REQUIRING MAXIMUM CONFIDENCE
posted by killdevil at 11:16 AM on September 15, 2005

I never got a dinar.
posted by yhbc at 11:16 AM on September 15, 2005

They call me the sloth.
posted by wakko at 11:16 AM on September 15, 2005

That was fun
posted by Keith Talent at 11:16 AM on September 15, 2005

It's the end of the world as we know it...
posted by rand at 11:16 AM on September 15, 2005

Last comment
posted by poppo at 11:16 AM on September 15, 2005

me last me last!
posted by twiggy at 11:16 AM on September 15, 2005

I didn't know Bush could write so pretty, or at all...
posted by Derek at 11:16 AM on September 15, 2005

I miss *P7A77.
posted by prak at 11:16 AM on September 15, 2005

I am eating green peas right now.
posted by 517 at 11:16 AM on September 15, 2005

After this thread is closed, I'm going to post it again.
posted by Specklet at 11:16 AM on September 15, 2005

THE PREPOSITION:

A FOREIGNER AND AN AMERICAN , LATE ENGR JOHN CREEK (SNR) AN OIL MERCHANT WITH THE FEDERAL GOVERNMENT OF NIGERIA, UNTIL HIS DEATH MONTHS AGO IN KENYA AIRBUS ( A3K-300) FLIGHT KQ430 BANKED WITH US AT UNION BANK OF NIGERIA PLC BENIN AND HAD A CLOSING BALANCE AS AT THE END OF MARCH 2001 WORTH $35,432,000USD , THE BANK NOW EXPECTS A NEXT OF KIN AS BENEFICIARY. VALUABLE EFFORT HAVE BEEN MADE BY THIS BANK TO GET IN YOUCH WITH ANY OF THE CREEKS RELATIVE OR FAMILY HAVE BEEN UNSUCESSFUL. IT IS BECAUSE OF THE PERCEIVED POSIBILITY OF NOT BEEN ABLE TO LOCATE ANY OF ENGR JOHN CREEK (SNR) NEXT OF KIN ( HE HAD NO WIFE OR CHILDREN THAT IS KNOWN TO US ).

THE MANAGEMENT UNDER THE INFLUENCE OF OUR CHAIRMAN AND MEMBERS OF THE BOARD OF DIRECTORS ARRANGEMENTS HAVE BEEN MADE FOR THE FUNDS TO BE DECLARED "UNCLAIMED" AND SUBSEQUENTLY DONATE THE FUNDS TO THE ARMS & ARMUNITION TRUST FUNDS AND THIS WILL FUTHER ENHANCE THE CAUSE OF WAR IN AFRICA AND THE WORLD IN GENERAL .

IN OTHER TO AVERT THIS NEGATIVE DEVELOPMENT SOME OF MY TRUSTED COLLEAGUES AND I NOW SEEK YOUR PERMISSION TO HAVE YOU STAND AS THE NEXT OF KIN TO THE LATE MR.JOHN CREEK (SNR) SO THAT THE FUNDS WILL BE RELEASED AND PAID INTO YOUR ACCOUNT AS THE BENEFICIARY NEXT OF KIN, ALL DOCUMENT AND PROOFS TO ENABLE YOU GET THIS FUNDS WILL BE CAREFULLY WORKED OUT . WE HAVE BEEN MANDATED BY THE BANK TO OFFICIALY DECLARE THE BENEFICIARY WITHIN THE SHORTEST POSSIBLE TIME , THAT IS WHY WE HAVE DECIDED TO CONTACT YOU AND MORE SO WE ARE ASSURING YOU THAT YOU THAT THE BUSINESS IS 100% RISK FREE INVOLVEMENT .

AS SOON AS WE RECEIVE AN ACKNOWLEDGEMENT OF THE RECEIPT OF THIS MESSAGE IN ACCEPTANCE OF OUR MUTUAL BUSINESS PROPOSAL WE WOULD FURNISH YOU WITH THE NECESSARY MODALITIES AND DISBURSEMENT RATIO TO SUIT BOTH PARTIES WITHOUT ANY CONFUSION .

IF THIS PROPOSAL IS ACCEPTABLE TO YOU DO NOT TAKE DUE ADVANTAGE OF THE TRUST BESTOWED ON YOU ,KINDLY RESPOND IMMEDIATELY WITH THE E-MAIL ADDRESS FURNISHING ME WITH YOUR MOST CONFIDENTIAL TELPHONE, FAX NUMBER AND YOUR EXCLUSIVE BANK ACCOUNT PARTICULARS SO THAT WE CAN USE THIS INFORMATION TO APPLY FOR THE RELEASE AND SUBSIQUENT TRANSFER OF FUNDS IN YOUR FAVOUR.

THANK YOU IN ADVANCED FOR YOUR ANTICIPATED CO-OPERATION

BEST REGARDS

MR TIJANI YUSUF
posted by killdevil at 11:16 AM on September 15, 2005

GIS for bush pee.
posted by LarryC at 11:16 AM on September 15, 2005

Last of the last of the last
posted by poppo at 11:16 AM on September 15, 2005

Yahtzee!
posted by maryh at 11:16 AM on September 15, 2005

I am not a fan of pie.
posted by prak at 11:16 AM on September 15, 2005

Oh yeah, and I so won the last comment contest.
posted by Specklet at 11:16 AM on September 15, 2005

Mission Bathroom Break: Accomplished.
posted by monju_bosatsu at 11:16 AM on September 15, 2005

you should have that checked, 517
posted by yhbc at 11:16 AM on September 15, 2005

Did that limerick ever get finished?
posted by soyjoy at 11:17 AM on September 15, 2005

Dammit!
posted by Specklet at 11:17 AM on September 15, 2005

you know, if someone posted some malformed HTML and broke the comment box, that would guarantee them the last post...
posted by reklaw at 11:17 AM on September 15, 2005

Can we collect some sort of prize for the winner? I'm putting up the drink, what else would others be willing to add?
posted by mystyk at 11:17 AM on September 15, 2005

We're accelerating here, folks - only 3 minutes for 47 posts. We're heading toward #300 in record time...
posted by jasper411 at 11:17 AM on September 15, 2005

Isn't it bad to hold it when you have to urinate? I know it was in that Joe Pesci movie, but still... Is their a urologist in the house?
posted by jperkins at 11:17 AM on September 15, 2005

Condi keeps extra TP in her purse.... just in case.
posted by R. Mutt at 11:17 AM on September 15, 2005

Ethereal Bligh is an asshat.
posted by postmodernmillie at 11:17 AM on September 15, 2005

Monju you are clever, but not clever enough as this is the last comment
posted by poppo at 11:17 AM on September 15, 2005

Everyone else is doing it...
posted by Moral Animal at 11:17 AM on September 15, 2005

IS IT CAPSLOCK DAY YET ?!?!?!??!!
posted by yhbc at 11:17 AM on September 15, 2005

I had a Stovepipe Porter and a Corsendonk Brown Ale last evening.
posted by sciurus at 11:17 AM on September 15, 2005

I will be the last commentor!
posted by TwelveTwo at 11:17 AM on September 15, 2005

ATTN.: THE MANAGING DIRECTOR / C. E. O.

REQUEST FOR URGENT (CONFIDENTIAL BUSINESS RELATIONSHIP
OF THE TRANSFER OF US$45,560,000.00 (FORTY FIVE
MILLION, FIVE HUNDRED AND SIXTY THOUSAND UNITED STATES
DOLLARS ONLY).

I hope this letter will not embarrass you since we
have not had any previous communication. I got your
reference from your country`s trade department under private enquiry that is
not related to my aim of writing you this letter and went further to have it
confirmed by the Nigeria Exports Promotion Council(NEPC).

I, on behalf of my other colleagues from different
Federal Government of Nigeria owned parastatals
decided to solicit your assistance as regards the
transfer of the above stated amount into your bank
account. This fund arose from the over-invoicing of
various contracts awarded in my parastatals to certain
foreign contractors some time ago.
posted by killdevil at 11:17 AM on September 15, 2005

O  O
(__)
posted by zeoslap at 11:17 AM on September 15, 2005

Anyone rememebr that song about electrons, that was like sung to the tune of Kellis' song "Milkshake"? That was funny.
posted by Snyder at 11:17 AM on September 15, 2005

The last word is mine! .
posted by monju_bosatsu at 11:18 AM on September 15, 2005

I have to pee too.
posted by Keith Talent at 11:18 AM on September 15, 2005

I hear they have these at the UN.
posted by grateful at 11:18 AM on September 15, 2005

No because TwelveTwo your math is incorrect in your nickname, here is the last comment
posted by poppo at 11:18 AM on September 15, 2005

When Clinton peed,
no one disagreed.
posted by Danf at 11:18 AM on September 15, 2005

THATS IT!

YOU ARE ALL BANNED!
posted by R. Mutt at 11:18 AM on September 15, 2005

no soyjoy, line 4 is for you. must rhyme with down
posted by sciurus at 11:18 AM on September 15, 2005

Shit, what now.

The little shits got more papers.

"Sir the gulf coast, the news, they still ..."

Fuck. Why now? Who'd a thunk it. Why I gotta deal with this now of all times.

"I signed papers for that a long time ago!"

"There's some more. Sorry. Those were for Cindy."

"Who the fuck is Cindy?"

He's cringing. The little fucker. Who the fuck IS Cindy?

"Goddam it. Are they really ... What's fox saying?"

He opens his mouth ... I can see it ... He wants to say something. What? What, boy?
Spit it out. Damn, this kid has no spine. Limp little handshake, whatsisname.

"They're saying ... it's all too slow, they're saying ... it was ... too little too late."

"But godamm it I remember signing papers before the whole thing? I thought thats what you do?
Don't most Presidents sign stuff after the thing, the thing, you know, disaster. I mean,
what do they want from me?"

The kids in like a fetal position, theres actually sweat on his lip. This kid doesnt know what
it's like. Whats he even doing here? I need to have a little talk to whatsisname, Aidy, Aide Guy?

"Well?"

"Yes sir, but ..."

"BUT? What's a but? You're saying but to the President in the Oval Office of the goddam
United States of America? This isn't the ranch! Give me those damn papers. Fix it!"

He wants to run. Just a kid ... I was a kid. And that shit did look pretty bad. He needs some
good strong support. Gotta be nice to the kid. Thats God's way. Look at him firm, yeah, look him
in the eye and show him how they do it.

"This is really damn awful, I'm just gonna have to tell 'em. I mean, we've been doing great,
extraordinary even. They just can't see it. It's subtle. That's when things aren't obvious. I'm
just gonna have to tell 'em ... i mean, didn't they see how much reese, meese, resources they had?
I saw it. i was there. there was fireman and aids and stuff. resources. just like i said. i'll
have to just tell 'em. Tell 'em like it is ... Hey, where's karl? Can he shit yet?"

"Pee, mr president ... He has kidney st-"

"WHATEVER!"

http://www.crooksandliars.com/2005/09/12.html#a4927
posted by 31d1 at 11:18 AM on September 15, 2005

malformed html (but not severely)
posted by mystyk at 11:18 AM on September 15, 2005

We are therefore seeking your assistance based on the
balance amount of US$45.560M, which can be speedily
processed and fully remitted into your nominated bank
account. On successful remittance of the fund into
your account, you will be compensated with 25% of the
amount for assistance and services and 5% set aside
for expenses contingency.

This transaction is closely knitted and in view of our
SENSITIVE POSITION we cannot afford a slip, I assure
you that this transaction is 100% risk free. We will
avail you with our identities as regards our
respective offices, when relationship is fully
established and smooth operation commences. I am at
your disposition to entertain any question(s) from you
in respect of this transaction, so contact me
immediately through the above private email addresses( Presidency & mail)
and fax number for
further information on the requirements and procedure. Please note that the
DEAL needs utmost confidentiality and your immediate response will be highly
appreciated and we will use our own share of the money to establish a
lucrative business in your country.
Please you should contact me immediately with your
private fax and telephone numbers where further
details in respect to this transaction would be sent
to.Please do not disregard my email for any reason because it was addressed
to and from myself, it is for security reason to avoid problem.
Yours truly,

ALHAJI SULEIMAN ABUBAKAR.
posted by killdevil at 11:18 AM on September 15, 2005

Oh god my wife is calling right now
posted by poppo at 11:18 AM on September 15, 2005

If he had the clap at the UN would that make it a burning bush?
posted by wakko at 11:18 AM on September 15, 2005

DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK DON'T BLINK
posted by reklaw at 11:18 AM on September 15, 2005

damn. server corrected it.
posted by mystyk at 11:18 AM on September 15, 2005

My doctor told me to do it. He also told me to do other things, bad things.
posted by 517 at 11:18 AM on September 15, 2005

My math is not incorrect! 12 + 2 = 14 = 5 = ILLUMINATI
posted by TwelveTwo at 11:18 AM on September 15, 2005

Everyone clamoring to get in the last comment, grow the hell up.

*inconspicuously pushes reklaw out of the way*
posted by iconomy at 11:18 AM on September 15, 2005

Isn't this a double-post?
posted by yhbc at 11:19 AM on September 15, 2005

Can we collect some sort of prize for the winner? I'm putting up the drink, what else would others be willing to add?

I'll add a drink to that.
posted by Moral Animal at 11:19 AM on September 15, 2005

Waitaminute! This thread ain't through until...



Ok, done.
posted by Civil_Disobedient at 11:19 AM on September 15, 2005