Failure

September 19, 2005 1:00 PM

What do you get when you search for "failure"? Though I'm sure this surely must have been posted on MeFi before, there might still be some readers who do not know.
posted by Lillitatiana (59 comments total)

Uh-oh.
posted by erebora at 1:01 PM on September 19, 2005

Actually the correct search term is "miserable failure."
It just sounds better.
posted by nofundy at 1:01 PM on September 19, 2005

It's funny that Michael Moore's site comes up second.

Err... crap post! An FPP that links to a google search? Fer shame. Etc.
posted by goatdog at 1:03 PM on September 19, 2005

Yeah but but but Michael Moore is number 2.

I lovar teh intarnets.
posted by fenriq at 1:03 PM on September 19, 2005

Biography of President George W. BushBiography of the president from the official White House web site.
www.whitehouse.gov/president/gwbbio.html - 33k - Cached - Similar pages

Welcome to MichaelMoore.com!Official site of the gadfly of corporations, creator of the film Roger and Me and the television show The Awful Truth. Includes mailing list, message board, ...
www.michaelmoore.com/ - 37k - Sep 17, 2005 - Cached - Similar pages

I humbly submit the core essence of Irony.... I couldn't think of two more fitting topics to grace the top of a frivolous search on Google.
posted by DuffStone at 1:04 PM on September 19, 2005

goatdog, Michael Moore's site does not come up second. Did you even click the link?
posted by delmoi at 1:04 PM on September 19, 2005

We apologise, you are seeing this messge because your withering sarcasm bandwidth has been exceded.
Please consider purchasing the fully-featured professional model.
posted by NinjaPirate at 1:04 PM on September 19, 2005

Micheal moore's site comes up 8th.

Also, there's a Failure magazine?
posted by delmoi at 1:05 PM on September 19, 2005

The beauty is the word failure does not appear anywhere in the page.
posted by caddis at 1:05 PM on September 19, 2005

I clicked on the link a loooong time ago, and Michael Moore was second even then.
'73 I think it was.
posted by NinjaPirate at 1:06 PM on September 19, 2005

MichaelMoore.com came up second for me.
posted by caddis at 1:07 PM on September 19, 2005

The politics of failure have failed! We must make them work again!
posted by blue_beetle at 1:07 PM on September 19, 2005

Yar, in my day we tied knaves ears 'round the cannon fer failure!
Today, you lubbers go an' alter search results on pop'lar search engines!

Yar. There be no room fer the likes of pirates no more. Yar.
posted by robocop is bleeding at 1:07 PM on September 19, 2005

MichaelMoore.com came up second for me.

Same here.
posted by ericb at 1:10 PM on September 19, 2005

MichaelMoore.com came up second for me.

Same here.

Me three.
posted by fixedgear at 1:11 PM on September 19, 2005

Been here, done this. Third and fourth links (when I adedd "miserable") were:

BBC NEWS | Americas | 'Miserable failure' links to Bush
Web users manipulate a popular search engine so an unflattering description leads to the president's page.
news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/americas/3298443.stm - 31k - Cached - Similar pages

Google's (and Inktomi's) Miserable Failure
A search for miserable failure on Google brings up the official George W. Bush biography from the US White House web site. Dismissed by Google as not a ...
searchenginewatch.com/sereport/article.php/3296101 - 46k - Sep 17, 2005 - Cached - Similar pages

I'm not sure anyone has missed this one.
posted by mmahaffie at 1:12 PM on September 19, 2005

woah, bizzare. MM's site comes up second now, but came up 8th before. Weirdness...
posted by delmoi at 1:12 PM on September 19, 2005

Must. Close. Italics. Tag.
posted by mmahaffie at 1:12 PM on September 19, 2005

Lillitatiana: Guessing you got this reference from today's TWiT podcast? (I just was playing with "failure" and "Miserable failure" searches 3 minutes before you posted.) If not... GET OUT OF MY HEAD!!!

And, yeah, Michael Moore comes up second.

And, yeah, this is really old news. But still funny.
posted by LordSludge at 1:14 PM on September 19, 2005

Yahoo must think slightly better of the man:

6. Biography of President George W. Bush features a biography of George W. Bush from the White House web site.
Category: President George W. Bush
www.whitehouse.gov/president/gwbbio.html - 32k - Cached - More from this site - Save - Block
posted by caddis at 1:14 PM on September 19, 2005

It comes up first for me, and the white house is way down the page.
posted by iconomy at 1:15 PM on September 19, 2005

Lordludge: I am in your head. My brother sent it to me randomly a few weeks ago, and I just thought I'd share... even with a bevy of jaded netcurmudgeons such as yourselves.

Aye, I've crushed seventeen men's skulls between me thighs!
posted by Lillitatiana at 1:19 PM on September 19, 2005

"Though I'm sure this surely must have been posted on MeFi before.." is not a great starting point for any post.
posted by fire&wings at 1:23 PM on September 19, 2005

Um, take a look at the first of the sponsored links: "Why these results?".
posted by MeetMegan at 1:24 PM on September 19, 2005

old news for most, but not fox news apparently: is google getting political?
posted by jjoye at 1:26 PM on September 19, 2005

Also, The link to failure magazine is totaly gone now!
posted by delmoi at 1:28 PM on September 19, 2005

this internet related chicanery is referred to as a google bomb and the last time I saw one, I fell off my dinosaur.
posted by punch_the_mayor at 1:28 PM on September 19, 2005

Moore's site is coming up #1 for me, with Bush nowhere to be found (screenshot). Jimmy Carter's bio (from whitehouse.gov) comes up in sixth.
posted by Godbert at 1:28 PM on September 19, 2005

punch_the_mayor: The last time I fell of my dinosaur, I was deafened by the Big Bang.
posted by Lillitatiana at 1:30 PM on September 19, 2005

Godbert, I think you and I have somehow ended up at one of the other internets that Bush keeps talking about.
posted by iconomy at 1:32 PM on September 19, 2005

"Though I'm sure this surely must have been posted on MeFi before, there might still be some readers who do not know."

You should be severely punished.
posted by Ethereal Bligh at 1:32 PM on September 19, 2005

I hardly need to go looking for failure...it's had no trouble finding me...
posted by alumshubby at 1:34 PM on September 19, 2005

Moore's site is coming up #1 for me, with Bush nowhere to be found

You must have safe-search turned on. We can't be exposing the children to such filth.
posted by caddis at 1:35 PM on September 19, 2005

Ethereal Bligh: You should be severely punished.
Easy, now. That's what she wants.
posted by LordSludge at 1:37 PM on September 19, 2005

So, like December, 2003
posted by simra at 1:39 PM on September 19, 2005

Question, why are different users apparently seeing different google results? I see Bush as 1 and Moore as 2. Godbert doesn't see Bush at all and apparently there is a Failure Magazine I should start submitting too.
posted by elwoodwiles at 1:40 PM on September 19, 2005

After further review of my own screenshot, I noticed that one of the two "sponsored links" accompanying the search is a link to the Google Blog explanation. Amusing.
posted by Godbert at 1:40 PM on September 19, 2005

And that's explanation for the Bush results, not the variations some of us seem to be having.
posted by Godbert at 1:42 PM on September 19, 2005

Though I'm sure this surely must have been posted on MeFi before, there might still be some readers who do not know.

Ahh yes. An issue so important it deserves a (possible) double post.

(yes, I've already flagged it)
posted by sbutler at 1:43 PM on September 19, 2005

And a third post: MeetMegan beat me to the Google Blog link. Failure, thy name is Godbert.
posted by Godbert at 1:43 PM on September 19, 2005

What do you get when you search for "Shitty Post"?
posted by Dreamghost at 1:51 PM on September 19, 2005

Post #5: "Welcome to Heart Failure Online!"

Incidentally, those top my list of the words I never want to hear said to me as a sentence.
posted by clevershark at 1:53 PM on September 19, 2005

Google has different data centers that produce somewhat different results. Click here to see a sample of what others are seeing.
posted by goatdog at 1:54 PM on September 19, 2005

Wait, do we get to play that "last comment" game again?
posted by soyjoy at 1:54 PM on September 19, 2005

Question, why are different users apparently seeing different google results?

Karl Rove hasn't gotten around to putting filters on everyone's computer yet.
posted by ericb at 1:57 PM on September 19, 2005

Lillitatiana, don't get too chuffed by the tons of comments this post is getting - it totally sucks. And it's a double. Even when it was a single, it still sucked so very badly.

Take that from a jaded netcurmudgeon ;)

But geez, it's already gotten more comments than all of my posts put together.

*shakes cane at all of the people commenting in this post, and vows to kill them all, then remembers that she too is posting, so changes her mind and goes to find some warm milk, bifocals, and a Jazzy Chair*
posted by iconomy at 1:57 PM on September 19, 2005

"Michael Moore is number 2"

So true on so many levels. tsk tsk
posted by mischief at 2:20 PM on September 19, 2005

MeTa.
posted by dreamsign at 2:31 PM on September 19, 2005

Oops. My bad.
posted by dreamsign at 2:31 PM on September 19, 2005

have you guys seen this crazy new flash thing?
posted by mrgrimm at 2:32 PM on September 19, 2005

And would you believe it? MetaFilter is only number 4!
posted by AwkwardPause at 2:35 PM on September 19, 2005

Where's the line for beating those that do FPP's soley consisting of a (tired and played out) Google bomb?

What's next?

"Dear Friends/Family: This email I got says this list of oil companies get all of their oil from the Middle East. It says if we boycott them, prices will come down and war will end!!!!1111!!"


Or will it be:

"LOL!!!1111 Check out this picture of a helicopter in the SF Bay- a Great White shark is jumping out of the water trying to get the guy on the rope....title says "And you thought your day was rough?!" Hahahahahahahaha...it's true!"

Nooooooo...I got it:

"Mary, go to this website...you can type in stuff like 'Bush is a loser' or 'Your college team sucks' and it makes it appear as if it's on a church sign!!!!!!"
posted by mrblondemang at 2:38 PM on September 19, 2005

There's also the #1 link for "asshole"...
posted by insomnia_lj at 2:44 PM on September 19, 2005

Santorum.
posted by ericb at 2:51 PM on September 19, 2005

mrblondemang, there's this site called www.snopes.com where they totally disprove the shark thing...

/ kidding!!!
posted by LordSludge at 2:59 PM on September 19, 2005

Yarrr, goatdog, that be quite informative of ye. I meself was confused about seein' Michael Moooooorrrrre at the top o' the mast.
posted by NickDouglas at 3:09 PM on September 19, 2005

whoa, the real story here is that when you click "Feeling Lucky" with "Failure" as your search term it takes you DIRECTLY to the whitehouse homepage.
posted by punkbitch at 3:14 PM on September 19, 2005

Who the fuck cares?
posted by SweetJesus at 3:44 PM on September 19, 2005

Neocon Liberal
posted by Mack Twain at 4:15 PM on September 19, 2005