MaryRomantic, MaryGentle, MaryNeedsalittlelamb
November 14, 2005 11:25 AM   Subscribe

Everyone remember MaryRomantic? (Previously on Metafilter) She had a list of demands that a man must meet that bordered on neurosis. Now she counsels! She's known as MaryGentle and will help you with your " excessive water consumption and thirst" and "caffeine abuse" through various personal affirmations.
posted by geoff. (40 comments total) 1 user marked this as a favorite

 
*patiently awaits MaryCrazedSlut*
posted by quonsar at 11:32 AM on November 14, 2005


I forgot to mention I love her technical how-to guide. It makes me miss 1999.
posted by geoff. at 11:35 AM on November 14, 2005


Polydipsia and polyuria (excessive thirst, drinking and urinating) can be an indicator in some forms of diabetes. I hope Mary's aware of that.
posted by alumshubby at 11:35 AM on November 14, 2005


Does she have a man yet?
posted by cilantro at 11:35 AM on November 14, 2005


Boy, the self-love page sure isn't what I had envisioned.
posted by mr_crash_davis at 11:40 AM on November 14, 2005


How to copy and paste. Awesome!

Somebody needs to hook her up with Mahir.
posted by mullingitover at 11:50 AM on November 14, 2005



Here's a more worthwhile Mary Gentle: Mary Gentle.

If I were the Mary Gentle in the link, I would be at least moderately honked off by Mary Crazybags's choice of URL.
posted by palmcorder_yajna at 11:58 AM on November 14, 2005


And, just in case it needs to be said, oops.
posted by palmcorder_yajna at 11:58 AM on November 14, 2005


I should have also asked, any health professionals or wannabes want to comment on what exactly is wrong with her? There must be a name for this, a form of some disease.
posted by geoff. at 12:02 PM on November 14, 2005


I believe the clinical term for her disorder is "Just Plain Nuttier Than ratshit In An Almond Joy Factory."
posted by jonmc at 12:04 PM on November 14, 2005


On her "about" page. she says .." I've made great progress in recovery from my own depression, anxiety disorders, several addictions, and relationship problems. "


Suuuuuuure, Mary.


Looks like she's still single to me. Unless you count BOB. (Battery Operated Boyfriend). From her web page:
I'm a woman growing in personal power through increasing self-love and impulse control.

Five bucks says that translates as "I masturbate as often as I can but I don't let myself get off because I'm saving myself for Mr Right."


Scary.
posted by keptwench at 12:07 PM on November 14, 2005


quonsar, she's been and gone:

Here are some of the areas in which I’ve made a great deal of recovery progress:
...
* sexual addiction;
* love addiction;

...
posted by languagehat at 12:07 PM on November 14, 2005


"I created this site because I want to help individuals be happier. My core message is the importance of learning to love oneself."

Oh come on people, give her a break... I think it's a noble cause. She does make a disclaimer stating that her advice is excusively based on personal experience and should not be a replacement for professional help/diagnosis.
posted by degnarra at 12:08 PM on November 14, 2005


Maybe she can counsel my car on its excessive oil consumption?
posted by anthill at 12:08 PM on November 14, 2005


It's a shame Dr Phil is already married. They'd be perfect for each other.
posted by keptwench at 12:09 PM on November 14, 2005


sheesh, pity the woman who has a sexual addiction while also being so picky.
posted by clevershark at 12:09 PM on November 14, 2005


I have no doubt that her intentions are good, that she wants to give people peace of mind. But you can't give what you don't have to begin with.

I also firmly believe that everyone's entitled to some love. But she needs to get her head a little straight first.
posted by jonmc at 12:10 PM on November 14, 2005


Taking the minority view here, maybe she's not any more screwed up than the next woman, just more appallingly up-front about it.

speaking as a guy who has more issues than a library's periodicals department, before you go hatin' on me
posted by alumshubby at 12:11 PM on November 14, 2005


Now that's a woman who knows what she wants! Cast your cavils aside, MetaScum!
posted by Captaintripps at 12:20 PM on November 14, 2005


I haven'.t been this sexually excited since the New York Post posted pictures of Twana Brawley. Remember her?
posted by Postroad at 12:25 PM on November 14, 2005


These are all the Daily Affirmations I need.
posted by JeffK at 12:27 PM on November 14, 2005


Holy shit, an available woman? That fits all my criteria.
posted by nervousfritz at 12:30 PM on November 14, 2005


pulse optional, fritz?
posted by jonmc at 12:31 PM on November 14, 2005


There is something about Mary - it is Mary, and her endless fascination with herself.
posted by Cranberry at 12:36 PM on November 14, 2005


mr_crash_davis: Boy, the self-love page sure isn't what I had envisioned.

I dunno, some her ideas, uh...ring true?

- In loving myself, I accept myself with all my imperfections.
- The more self-esteem I have, the better I treat myself.
- I love myself enough to take care of myself.
- ...other than self-love, there is no other source of basic happiness

posted by tpl1212 at 12:37 PM on November 14, 2005


:oP
posted by nervousfritz at 12:39 PM on November 14, 2005


Laffo. It's 2000 all over again. She strikes me as someone who gets off more on being single and looking. If she were to actually score a mate, it may be anti-climatic for her.

Nervousfritz - My hats off to you if you are ever able to meet her laundry list of expectations in a mate; pulse or no pulse.
posted by KevinSkomsvold at 12:40 PM on November 14, 2005


Hey nervousfritz, this lovely lady's available too but you have to buy her house first.
posted by fenriq at 12:41 PM on November 14, 2005


I'm a woman growing in personal power through increasing self-love and impulse control.

Did anybody else sigh when they read this? I guess I should just count my blessings that I never have to have a conversation with her. I can only imagine how tiresome that would be.

Affirmations > Sleep
I love myself enough to create a lifestyle that supports my getting plenty of sleep.


Christ, just reading this shit is enough to tire me.
posted by Secret Life of Gravy at 12:44 PM on November 14, 2005


Sounds like everything I hate about pop psychology in one delightfully disgusting sushi roll.

Kevin: I think you misread fritz.
posted by Ynoxas at 2:12 PM on November 14, 2005


Mary has such a soothing voice. Her website just drew me in for 40 minutes and I'm not quite sure why.
posted by nonmerci at 3:33 PM on November 14, 2005


What the hell? Is that a personal ad or the technical repair manual for a high-bypass turbofan engine? Snag points? Signal words? Articles?

Even in my effervescent, never-ending spew polyloquacity I am simply awed and shamed right out of the ballpark by this. It makes CIA Neurolinguistic programming manuals look like the crayon-scribbles of a extra-chromasonal child by comparison.

I have a certain kind of princess attitude.

Really?

As a nonworking, romantic-minded woman, I've had the luxury of being able to make finding love my main avocation...my full-time career.

Heh. Does your momma know?

I ask any man who wants to meet me to give me a small gift when we meet in person. I do this for two reasons — first, I don't work and I could use a little extra help right now,

A little help? Lady, there's not enough help in the world for you! Try Saturn, it's a really big planet. I bet they have lots of help for you.
posted by loquacious at 4:21 PM on November 14, 2005


From the "Getting Things Done" affirmations:

(I say these things to myself only to encourage myself regarding things that are important to me to do. I believe in leaving many unessential things undone or unfinished.)

Every little bit counts.

Every little bit I get done brings me closer to completion. Eventually it will all get done.

One step at a time.

Something is better than nothing.


So in other words, if she rolls her ass out of bed and brushes her teeth, she is getting things done! If she decides to huddle under the covers while her personal demons dance on the bedclothes (she does seem like she would have those kinds of days), that's OK too, since rolling her ass out of bed was nonessential that day anyway.

I bet she has a crystal collection and reads Melody.
posted by MiHail at 5:26 PM on November 14, 2005


Did anyone else think she sounds an awful lot like Georgette from the "Mary Tyler Moore" show?
posted by qwip at 7:16 PM on November 14, 2005


She makes a lot of (nice sounding) valid points. I will grant that.

But most people don't post manically and haphazardly organized diatribes to themselves under the illusion that they're therapists helping others.

Much less posting 50 page control freak diatribes in attempts to lure free gifts/money or men who exactly match a delusional 500 point specification callout.

She also seems to need to remind herself of a lot of basic common sense stuff, which is even more worrisome. Sure, lots of people jot down notes or reminders to themselves as aids in self improvement. But not like that.
posted by loquacious at 8:31 PM on November 14, 2005


She mentions OCD. Clearly that's an issue.
posted by Artifice_Eternity at 11:20 PM on November 14, 2005


loquacious wrote: But most people don't post manically and haphazardly organized diatribes to themselves under the illusion that they're therapists helping others.

And Metafilter is for... what? :)
posted by cleverusername at 7:14 AM on November 15, 2005 [1 favorite]


Supporting Growth in Self-love

I can't find it on the archived site, but I distinctly remember she was extremely anti self-love.

I wish she'd make up her mind.
posted by deborah at 9:28 AM on November 15, 2005


At least she's not running around killing people. All in all, I'd categorise her as "mostly harmless."
posted by five fresh fish at 11:03 AM on November 15, 2005


Didn't someone write that about Planet Earth once? ;)

And it is, I guess, when compared to a Pan-Galactic Gargle Blaster.

And Metafilter is for... what? :)

Heh. My forboding sense of the irony in that statement nearly made my internal organs go on a complete no-work strike and kill me. ;) Oh dear God, someone is going to call me on that, I just know it. Shitshitshit...
posted by loquacious at 12:28 PM on November 15, 2005


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