Go shorty. It's your bat mitzvah.

November 29, 2005 3:20 PM

Concert of the century:50 Cent, Tom Petty, Aerosmith and others rock a bat mitzvah.
posted by ab'd al'Hazred (35 comments total)

Yes! No time elapsed between these two. A new record (low).
posted by fixedgear at 3:22 PM on November 29, 2005

"Go shorty, it's your bat miztvah, we gonna party like it's your bat mitzvah."
posted by brundlefly at 3:25 PM on November 29, 2005

Who was talking about the excesses of the 80's?

I'm glad that the money David Brooks makes off the backs of soldiers goes to hire sellout minguai for his daughter's bat mitzvah.

Mazel tov, David. You've arrived.
posted by jsavimbi at 3:26 PM on November 29, 2005

this is embarrassing.
posted by Kifer85 at 3:39 PM on November 29, 2005

I wonder if Kenny G and 50 Cent are buds.
posted by thirteenkiller at 3:46 PM on November 29, 2005

Those guys in the other thread discussing this are suckers. This post is better.
posted by Smedleyman at 3:48 PM on November 29, 2005

Those guys in the other thread discussing this are suckers. This post is better.

Well, first, anyway.
posted by dersins at 3:50 PM on November 29, 2005 [1 favorite]

Smedleyman you traitor!
posted by thirteenkiller at 3:52 PM on November 29, 2005

For his estimated $500,000, I hear that 50 Cent performed only four or five songs - and badly - though he did manage to work in the lyric, "Go shorty, it's your bat miztvah, we gonna party like it's your bat mitzvah."

Oh my god.
posted by delmoi at 3:54 PM on November 29, 2005

Am I the only one who thinks this seems fake?
Am I the only one who thinks this seems fake?
posted by jpf at 4:05 PM on November 29, 2005

"Fitty and his posse smelled like an open bottle of Hennessy," a witness told told me, adding that when the departing rapper prepared to enter his limo in the loading dock, a naked woman was spotted inside.

I wish this was written about me and my posse.
posted by loquax at 4:16 PM on November 29, 2005

Loquax and his posse smelled like an open bottle of Maneschewitz," a witness told me, adding that when the departing poster prepared to enter his limo in the loading dock, a naked dwarf was spotted inside.
posted by plexiwatt at 4:21 PM on November 29, 2005

I only had Peabo Bryson at my bat mitzvah.
posted by plexiwatt at 4:23 PM on November 29, 2005

For his estimated $500,000, I hear that 50 Cent performed only four or five songs - and badly - though he did manage to work in the lyric, "Go shorty, it's your bat miztvah, we gonna party like it's your bat mitzvah."

Oh my god.
posted by ab'd al'Hazred at 4:26 PM on November 29, 2005

Yes!! I'll take it.
posted by loquax at 4:29 PM on November 29, 2005

So some 50-year-old asshole hired Tom Petty, Aerosmith, the Eagles, Fleetwood Mac, and Kenny G for his 12 year old daughter's party? Slick. Sounds pretty much like how I used to pick out Christmas presents for my brother when I was 7.
posted by queen zixi at 4:31 PM on November 29, 2005

You hired fitty cent and his posse when you were 7?
posted by dersins at 4:39 PM on November 29, 2005 [1 favorite]

Smedleyman you traitor!
posted by thirteenkiller



Moo Hoo HA HA!

Pendens proditor
posted by Smedleyman at 4:42 PM on November 29, 2005

"Go shorty, it's your bat miztvah, we gonna party like it's your bat mitzvah."

If footage of that ever leaks on the internet, his career is so over.
posted by kickingtheground at 4:46 PM on November 29, 2005

some stuff
posted by Smedleyman

take THAT
posted by thirteenkiller at 4:47 PM on November 29, 2005

kickingtheground: Which probably explains why 50's goons wouldn't let anyone take pictures or video at the party.
posted by Mercaptan at 4:50 PM on November 29, 2005

Hey, half a mill is better than the label pays for an album!
posted by jeffburdges at 4:50 PM on November 29, 2005

According to gawker the guy stiffed the waitstaff, too.
posted by delmoi at 5:06 PM on November 29, 2005

infidel asshole that I am, I still have grave doubts on the halakhic propriety -- at least in spirit if not in letter -- of the whole situation. I mean, a war profiteer and union-buster. and by the way, he's the guy who owns Point Blank Body Armor, the nice armor vest maker whose product gets recalled with alarming frequency. they sold crap to the NYPD, they still seel crap to soldiers in Iraq.

just google "Point Blank Body Armor" and "recall".

at times like these, one hopes that God really exists, and She is vengeful beyond human imagination.

oh, and Kenny G? wtf?
posted by matteo at 5:46 PM on November 29, 2005

Kenny G *is* God's vengeance, matteo. Listen to enough of that and you'll wish you were a pillar of salt.
posted by arto at 7:33 PM on November 29, 2005

"the 150 kids in attendance seemed more impressed by their $1,000 gift bags, complete with digital cameras and the latest video iPod."

Wow. . . and I thought maybe I was being too generous with the glow in the dark plastic dinosaurs for my son's 8th birthday party.
posted by mygothlaundry at 8:56 PM on November 29, 2005

I wonder if Kenny G was the naked girl in 50's limo.
posted by phaedon at 1:12 AM on November 30, 2005

Ummm... is this really news? I remember seeing some story YEARS ago about how bands (I think it was Good Charlotte? Or ONE of those pop-"punk" bands anyway) were getting paid big money to play bar mitzvahs.
posted by antifuse at 3:30 AM on November 30, 2005

The key here is "multimillionaire defense contractor"
posted by cedar key at 6:45 AM on November 30, 2005

According to gawker the guy stiffed the waitstaff, too.

uh, you mean this isn't Gawker?
posted by dontoine at 10:18 AM on November 30, 2005

Nothing exceeds like excess.
posted by MotherTucker at 12:02 PM on November 30, 2005

The key here is "multimillionaire defense contractor"

Apparently he sells bulletproof vests to the Pentagon. So, as things are running in Mess O'Potamia it doesn't seem as if he's going to run out of money anytime soon...
posted by Skeptic at 1:32 PM on November 30, 2005

Apparently he sells faulty bulletproof vests to the Pentagon.
posted by five fresh fish at 3:03 PM on November 30, 2005

Pictures.
posted by brundlefly at 3:37 PM on November 30, 2005

Pictures.

check out 50 Cent's pictures. that's one big cross to wear at a bat mitzvah
posted by matteo at 6:20 AM on December 8, 2005