Comments on: F'd Metal

F'd Metal

grumdrig — Thu, 05 Jan 2006 09:26:35 -0800

Philip J. Kaplan is probably best known as the founder of Fuckedcompany which chronicled the bustiest parts of the dot-com boom Fewer, perhaps, recognize him in his guise as power-glam-rocker Beef Savage. Beef has been silent for years, but has now been (barely) reinvented as The Metalizer. "I take regular songs (that suck) and turn them into heavy metal songs (that ROCK)."

By: jikel_morten

jikel_morten — Thu, 05 Jan 2006 09:31:25 -0800

He also started adbrite, no?

By: stinkycheese

stinkycheese — Thu, 05 Jan 2006 09:34:16 -0800

Perhaps he's not aware that "The Locomotion" wasn't originally by Kylie Minogue? You'd think she could've taken a moment from her labours and let him know.

By: alteredcarbon

alteredcarbon — Thu, 05 Jan 2006 09:35:28 -0800

My ears are bleeding. *holds lighter in air*

By: Wolfdog

Wolfdog — Thu, 05 Jan 2006 09:37:59 -0800

Sorry, Children of Bodom already set the standard for metallizing Britney. And I'm not even mentioning the Heavy Metal Tribute to ABBA. The 'J' is for johnny-come-lately.

By: Armitage Shanks

Armitage Shanks — Thu, 05 Jan 2006 09:45:46 -0800

Perhaps he's not aware that "The Locomotion" wasn't originally by Kylie Minogue? Juice Newton's Angel of the Morning was a cover as well. At least Britney is a true original.

By: psmealey

psmealey — Thu, 05 Jan 2006 09:54:43 -0800

Juice Newton's Angel of the Morning was a cover as well. I wonder if this is a generational thing. Most GenX'ers I know, myself included, obssess about musical/pop cultural trivia minuitia like the Juice Newton thing, and the fact that "Kim the Waitress" was not a Material Issue original, but a cover. Most whatever-the-name-of-the-generation-that-comes-after-gen-x-is-ers (pud is just 30) seem to be blissfully unaware, or just don't care to know which songs are covers and by whom. /ot

By: dabitch

dabitch — Thu, 05 Jan 2006 10:27:14 -0800

pud is only 30?

By: team lowkey

team lowkey — Thu, 05 Jan 2006 10:40:44 -0800

Metalizing songs is an essential service for those who can't hear pop music. It's a shame he's just not any good at it. He's not metalizing anything. These are pretty straight forward covers sung in a bad Axl impression. Now Beatallica on the other hand...

By: mrgrimm

mrgrimm — Thu, 05 Jan 2006 10:51:10 -0800

I take regular songs (that suck) and turn them into heavy metal songs (that ROCK). So kinda like Pat Boone in reverse? It sounds an awful lot like South Park parody. And is it just me, or is there a concerted effort by conservatives/libertarians to reclaim "gay" as a perjorative? I've noticed it thrice recently. /OT

By: mrgrimm

mrgrimm — Thu, 05 Jan 2006 10:53:29 -0800

pejorative (i think)

By: ereshkigal45

ereshkigal45 — Thu, 05 Jan 2006 10:53:32 -0800

I remember when I visited fuckedcompany as regularly as I now visit metafilter, which is to say constantly. And yet, this post is the first time I've even thought of that site in at least a year.

By: HTuttle

HTuttle — Thu, 05 Jan 2006 10:54:34 -0800

I take regular songs (that suck) and turn them into heavy metal songs (that ROCK)." I just looked up 'LAME' in the dictionary and, sure enough, they had that quote there.

By: thanotopsis

thanotopsis — Thu, 05 Jan 2006 10:56:16 -0800

He also started adbrite, no? Yep. I used to get checks from pud. That was fun.

By: quonsar

quonsar — Thu, 05 Jan 2006 11:21:45 -0800

not funny. not well done. meh.

By: tpl1212

tpl1212 — Thu, 05 Jan 2006 11:32:58 -0800

"Beef Savage" is such a way-better name then "The Metalizer."

By: stinkycheese

stinkycheese — Thu, 05 Jan 2006 12:20:28 -0800

Yeah, "The Metalizer" sounds like something you'd see a half-hour infomercial for at 3am.

By: TeamBilly

TeamBilly — Thu, 05 Jan 2006 12:22:33 -0800

This makes about the 37th band, artist, whatever, doing exactly this - taking "suck" songs and making them into songs that "rock". It seems to be a major trend, at least in these parts.

By: clearlynuts

clearlynuts — Thu, 05 Jan 2006 12:26:02 -0800

I guess some people know their limitations and maximize their talents ...

By: stinkycheese

stinkycheese — Thu, 05 Jan 2006 12:32:45 -0800

This makes about the 37th band, artist, whatever, doing exactly this Are you kidding? Back in 1991, a local Oshawa-area band named Voodoo Chicken (that's right) had quite a career going for themselves doing just this sort of thing - the lead singer is now involved with White Cowbell Oklahoma, if that rings any bells for anyone. I'm guessing it's more like the 37,000th time - this kind of joke is very, very old indeed.

By: Wolfdog

Wolfdog — Thu, 05 Jan 2006 12:38:09 -0800

It doesn't have to be a joke, though; strong songwriting thrives when it is borrowed, reused, translated into new genres. I mean, to take a well-known example, Richard Thompson didn't cover Oops! because he thought it was trash and it'd be cool & ironic to make fun of it; he did it because it's a fundamentally solid song that'd show up well even in the extremely transparent medium of solo acoustic guitar and voice. This guy is taking songs that he doesn't have any respect for (maybe reasonably so) and just trying to make a different kind of trash out of them, which is not so thrilling.

By: StarForce5

StarForce5 — Thu, 05 Jan 2006 12:49:55 -0800

Bah. That's OK but not nearly as good as a grungy Local H cover of Britney Spears "Toxic".

By: 3.2.3

3.2.3 — Thu, 05 Jan 2006 14:02:14 -0800

i haven't gotten an fc sporadic in years. they used to come every few days before pud published his tell all book.

By: kookywon

kookywon — Thu, 05 Jan 2006 14:21:45 -0800

link to Richard Thompson 'Oops!'

By: troybob

troybob — Thu, 05 Jan 2006 15:21:22 -0800

I'll look forward to hearing what Kaplan has to say when he no doubt shows up as one of those sad personalities on VH1's Look Back at 2006, which should start airing sometime in November.

By: Jawn

Jawn — Thu, 05 Jan 2006 19:44:30 -0800

Heh, I do just the reverse. I arrange metal songs for the banjo, playing a little more classical/folk style than bluegrass. I like to think that the songs I cover started out Rokken and continue to be Rokken and possibly Totally Rokken when regenred.

By: rmm

rmm — Sat, 07 Jan 2006 10:39:30 -0800

I'll have you all know that the best cover of Toxic is the one that crosses it with Dr. Who... *goes back to lurk*