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A Nation of Saints
February 24, 2006 1:52 AM   Subscribe

One in five Americans consider themselves "holy", according to a recent poll by the Barna Research Group.
posted by bcveen (52 comments total)

 
Not only "holy" but "holier than thou", to boot. Behold my piety, ye heathens, and despair.
Ya! Big sankty shout-out to my Lutheran homies!
posted by hal9k at 2:05 AM on February 24, 2006


100% of solipsists consider themselves wholly.
posted by BitterOldPunk at 2:06 AM on February 24, 2006


fuck religion. it is stupid.

but you know what even more? fuck the daily let's take the piss out of religion link which is posted on Metafilter every day. you peopl are as boring as your enemies.
posted by dydecker at 2:14 AM on February 24, 2006


You have no idea just how special I am.
posted by cytherea at 2:23 AM on February 24, 2006


That was brilliant, BitterOldPunk!
posted by katiecat at 2:36 AM on February 24, 2006


beliefnet ? Ah marketing for the believer I see.

JUST NOW buy this limited edition, gold embroided silver lined signature edition of the HOLY BIBLE ! Never was a book more readen and more treasured then this precious wobble of wiseness.

ACT NOW operators are standing by call 1-555-ASSHOLE
posted by elpapacito at 2:38 AM on February 24, 2006


If Burt Ward was here, I bet he'd say... "Holy Americans, Batman!"

... or maybe not. I just couldn't resist. (Yes, it's a slow day at work.)
posted by Incharitable Dog at 2:40 AM on February 24, 2006


The study also asked Americans to define holy. The largest category of respondents (21 percent) admitted they didn't know how to.

Jesus fucking Christ, what kind of lumpen idiot proudly claims to be holy without actually knowing what it is to be holy?
posted by jack_mo at 2:52 AM on February 24, 2006


"Holy! Holy! Holy! Holy! Holy! Holy! Holy! Holy! Holy!
Holy! Holy! Holy! Holy! Holy! Holy!
The world is holy! The soul is holy! The skin is holy!
The nose is holy! The tongue and cock and hand
and asshole holy!
Everything is holy! everybody's holy! everywhere is
holy! everyday is in eternity! Everyman's an
angel!
The bum's as holy as the seraphim! the madman is
holy as you my soul are holy!
The typewriter is holy the poem is holy the voice is
holy the hearers are holy the ecstasy is holy!
Holy Peter holy Allen holy Solomon holy Lucien holy
Kerouac holy Huncke holy Burroughs holy Cas-
sady holy the unknown buggered and suffering
beggars holy the hideous human angels!
Holy my mother in the insane asylum! Holy the cocks
of the grandfathers of Kansas!
Holy the groaning saxophone! Holy the bop
apocalypse! Holy the jazzbands marijuana
hipsters peace & junk & drums!
Holy the solitudes of skyscrapers and pavements! Holy
the cafeterias filled with the millions! Holy the
mysterious rivers of tears under the streets!
Holy the lone juggernaut! Holy the vast lamb of the
middle class! Holy the crazy shepherds of rebell-
ion! Who digs Los Angeles IS Los Angeles!
Holy New York Holy San Francisco Holy Peoria &
Seattle Holy Paris Holy Tangiers Holy Moscow
Holy Istanbul!
Holy time in eternity holy eternity in time holy the
clocks in space holy the fourth dimension holy
the fifth International holy the Angel in Moloch!
Holy the sea holy the desert holy the railroad holy the
locomotive holy the visions holy the hallucina-
tions holy the miracles holy the eyeball holy the
abyss!
Holy forgiveness! mercy! charity! faith! Holy! Ours!
bodies! suffering! magnanimity!
Holy the supernatural extra brilliant intelligent
kindness of the soul!"

Allen Ginsberg, Footnote to Howl
posted by eustacescrubb at 2:56 AM on February 24, 2006


"fuck the daily let's take the piss out of religion link which is posted on Metafilter every day. you peopl are as boring as your enemies."

What, and let religious twits go through with such utter, utter stupidity? Are you new to MeFi? ;)
posted by slater at 3:02 AM on February 24, 2006


Funny. I'm Christian, and I'd say Ginsberg was the most correct. All is holy. Simple, isn't it?

Now, go look in the mirror, and behold that which is holy. Whatcha gonna do about it?

Of course these fundy weenies wouldn't likely agree with me. But their wish is to find that which 'proves' them better than the people they dislike. My point is that everyone is just as good as myself. Even the weenies.

Don't like it? Go bless yourself.
posted by Goofyy at 3:29 AM on February 24, 2006 [1 favorite]


20% is still below the 27% crazification factor.
posted by sohcahtoa at 3:38 AM on February 24, 2006


I got your holy.
posted by three blind mice at 3:44 AM on February 24, 2006


Holy actually means separate, or being set apart for God.

So by definition not everything is.

And Ginsburg's poem just sounds like a bipolar rant, frankly. Just sayin'.
posted by konolia at 3:55 AM on February 24, 2006


Harry Whittington gets my vote for holiest man in America. He's full of holes, for Christ's sake.
posted by kcds at 4:05 AM on February 24, 2006


Holy actually means separate, or being set apart for God.

thank you konolia. buncha semi-literate knee-jerk self-worshippers in here, as usual.
posted by quonsar at 4:23 AM on February 24, 2006


Ginsburg's poem is one of the most beautiful goddamn bipolar rants ever put to paper. Dear lord, nobody's trying to claim the man was stable.
posted by nebulawindphone at 4:36 AM on February 24, 2006 [1 favorite]


There must be a Courtney Love joke around here somewhere.
posted by mickeyz at 4:45 AM on February 24, 2006


They certainly are ass-holy. Er......and what Alan Ginsberg said.
posted by sfts2 at 5:01 AM on February 24, 2006 [1 favorite]


If the Harold Qwerty Research Group asked 1000 Americans if they considered themselves to be "potrzebie," 20% would say yes.

It's a mad world. That's all I'm saying.
posted by milquetoast at 5:05 AM on February 24, 2006


I'll raise you one: If 1000 Americans were asked if they considered themselves to be "Allen Ginsberg," 20% might say yes.
posted by mickeyz at 5:11 AM on February 24, 2006


The only thing holy about me is my underwear.
posted by briank at 5:18 AM on February 24, 2006


One in five creationist mammoths consider themselves wooly.
posted by qvantamon at 6:14 AM on February 24, 2006


I'm reminded of that Steve Allen bit where he asks passersby if, "in all honesty" they could vote for an "admitted heterosexual".

A surprising number of people said no, and took the opportunity to go on a rant about the gay lifestyle.

...so milquetoast is probably right on this one.
posted by aramaic at 6:31 AM on February 24, 2006 [1 favorite]


I always took 'holy' to mean 'saintly'. I'm interested in knowing how many of those who consider themselves 'holy' are protestant.

I think part of the problem is the Charismata treating all religious terms as pseudonyms for each other.

"We will walk, bathed in sanctimonious light as holy beings, lifted up by the Lord our God, to be righteous believers and blah blah blah" without giving any of those terms the proper definition that belongs to them.

This is why we need to protect heritage churches - places where the liturgy and the message from the pulpit are treated with respect - not like some Sunday morning cartoon show for people who already know all the words to the song.

Then again, people don't like to go to church and be told stuff they don't want to hear.

Even Spong says, "People don't go to church to feel bad."

So... in short... people are dumb. git er done. praise the lord. peta sucks.
posted by Baby_Balrog at 6:39 AM on February 24, 2006


fuck religion.
posted by mike3k at 7:14 AM on February 24, 2006


Yes, mike3k. That is a totally mature approach to the deeply-held beliefs of 98% of the Earth's population.

flagged.
posted by Baby_Balrog at 7:33 AM on February 24, 2006


Credit cards. Continuous wars. Rampant hypocricy. Corruption. Perversion of religion to achieve political ends.

If the more fanatical portion of the population is right, and Jesus is coming back soon, I can't help but thing he will either be incomprehensibly sad or frighteningly angry. Perhaps even both.
posted by Saydur at 7:47 AM on February 24, 2006


Jesus is coming back soon

Classic
posted by Mr_Zero at 8:18 AM on February 24, 2006


fuck religion. it is stupid.

Yes, but it's probably not stupid enough to fail to use capital letters where necessary. I seriously wish you kidz would realise how few favours you do yourselves by writing like ill-educated dimwits.
posted by Decani at 8:31 AM on February 24, 2006


I hear 60 percent of people named Holly think they're Holy.
posted by Astro Zombie at 8:35 AM on February 24, 2006


80% of people in America don't think they are holy.
posted by sciurus at 8:46 AM on February 24, 2006


Holy actually means separate, or being set apart for God.

So by definition not everything is.


i thought god was everywhere, and that he was the creator of all that is; therefore, everything is for god.

if some things are set apart for god, for whom or what are others things? we can't say they're set apart for the people -- we're god's creatures and god is part of us.

if i own a building, how can i determine that a portion of it is holy -- god is responsible for all the lumber, the stones, the metal, the paint, etc., but somehow only a part of it is really his? if we say the whole building is his, does that include airspace? if i go to the roof of the building, can i shout blasphemies if i'm jumping up in the air when i speak?

i'm sorry ,i just really don't understand. either god is all, and therefore everything is holy, or the act of ascribing the characteristic "holy" to things is arbitrary, human-directed, and ultimately meaningless.

i personally think that if believers in religion found everything holy, they'd probably treat the world and their fellow humans a lot better. by saying that only certain things and people are holy, you open the door to all kinds of fucked up things.
posted by lord_wolf at 9:01 AM on February 24, 2006


This thread reads like a Digg post. What the hell is going on around here? Quiet children, the grownups are trying to talk.
posted by JeffK at 9:03 AM on February 24, 2006


if 98% of the world's population are so into religion I never meet any of these people? 98% of the people I know are athiests.

newsflash: not everywhere in the world is like the usa or iran.

the only place I have religion constantly in my face is here at metafilter.
posted by dydecker at 9:06 AM on February 24, 2006


Are they the same 1 in 5 Americans that vote?
posted by Eideteker at 9:14 AM on February 24, 2006


I guess they're not singing this hymn:

"Holy, holy, holy! Thou the darkness hide Thee,
Though the eye of sinful man Thy glory may not see;
Only Thou art holy - there is none beside Thee
Perfect in pow'r, in love and purity."


Truth be told, I'm not singing it either.
posted by djeo at 9:24 AM on February 24, 2006


Well, holy shit.
posted by Foosnark at 9:27 AM on February 24, 2006


I'm humming it a little.
posted by Astro Zombie at 9:28 AM on February 24, 2006


Astro Zombie: I'm humming it a little.

Yeah, now I have it stuck in my head. The hazards of an evangelical upbringing, I guess. Time for some Operation Mindcrime to scour out the old ear worms.
posted by djeo at 9:46 AM on February 24, 2006


I find the Kookaburra song works in getting songs unstuck from inside my head.
posted by Astro Zombie at 10:02 AM on February 24, 2006


98% of the people I know are athiests.

You can't be serious.

Just so you don't think I'm inflating numbers to support my position:
From the editor of "Positive Atheist" Magazine:

"The most thorough assessment of religious trends lives on adherents.com. To wade through these over 57,000 statistics would be quite a chore. Suffice it to say that if by atheist you mean somebody who consciously and deliberately rejects as falsehood the claim that gods exist, we're about four percent. If by atheist you mean somebody who lacks belief in gods for whatever reason (and this form of atheism is compatible with the agnosticism that simply doesn't know), then we're over one-fifth of the world's population."

Cliff Walker
"Positive Atheism" Magazine
Five years of service to
people with no reason to believe
posted by Baby_Balrog at 10:41 AM on February 24, 2006


Oh, and, Jeffk: "This thread reads like a Digg post. What the hell is going on around here? Quiet children, the grownups are trying to talk."

What the fuck? I wish I had an 'asshole of the day' trophy to give you.

How sophomoric is it to enter a thread, comment on how unenlightened everyone commenting is, offer absolutely nothing of value to the conversation, and disappear? You're like a sentient fart.
posted by Baby_Balrog at 10:43 AM on February 24, 2006


Woohoo! I win!

But seriously, I when I see a bunch of crap like that in a thread, I can't resist calling it out. Does that mean I'm obligated to stick around and watch things degrade further? I think not. That being said, here is my "intelligent" contribution:

I do consider myself "holy". I am also an agnostic, so my definition of "holy" differs a bit from those presented in the article. By my reckoning, anyone who strives to live by any moral code, be that a formal religious code or a personal code of ethics, should be considered "holy". Also, failure to live up to one's moral code does not necessarily reduce one's holiness. As long as you're striving to better yourself you are holy.

So, in an attempt to increase my holiness, I will strive to become less snarky.

Better?
posted by JeffK at 11:13 AM on February 24, 2006


Ginsburg's [sic] poem just sounds like a bipolar rant, frankly. Just sayin'

That's awfully rich coming from someone who talks back to the voices in their head. Just sayin'.
posted by joe lisboa at 11:43 AM on February 24, 2006 [1 favorite]


Now THAT's comedy.

or is it!?

it is.
posted by sonofsamiam at 12:14 PM on February 24, 2006


....people need to take a longer look in the mirror. really.
posted by Doorstop at 12:58 PM on February 24, 2006


God is omnipresent (everywhere) but He is not every THING. That would be a form of pantheism. He is both transcendent and immanent. Above all things, yet amongst all things, you could say.
posted by konolia at 1:04 PM on February 24, 2006


Panentheism, konolia?
posted by sonofsamiam at 1:08 PM on February 24, 2006


Careful, sonofsamiam. There's two.

Pantheism

Panentheism

And Jeffk - thanks for contributing. Truth be told, I agree with you.
posted by Baby_Balrog at 1:51 PM on February 24, 2006


pantheism states that God and the universe are synonymous.

panentheism states that God is in everything in the universe. Kind of like ... if the universe was a Twinkie, God would be creamy goodness.
posted by Baby_Balrog at 1:53 PM on February 24, 2006


Eureka, this explains everything. *Uni verse collapses*
posted by uni verse at 1:00 PM on February 25, 2006


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