Comments on: Meow meow HISS Ah, yes. Needs tuning, madam.

Meow meow HISS Ah, yes. Needs tuning, madam.

loquacious — Wed, 01 Mar 2006 19:05:25 -0800

A piano. A catgut free piano. A catgut free piano that includes cats. Very angry cats.

By: mr_crash_davis

mr_crash_davis — Wed, 01 Mar 2006 19:09:37 -0800

Sing us a song, you're the Piano Meow Sing us a song tonight Well we're all in the mood for a meowlody And you've got us feeling all right

By: rob paxon

rob paxon — Wed, 01 Mar 2006 19:10:22 -0800

I tried making one but am lacking a soprano. Anyone know where I can find the "Meow Mix" cat?

By: thirteenkiller

thirteenkiller — Wed, 01 Mar 2006 19:10:48 -0800

try a kitten

By: rob paxon

rob paxon — Wed, 01 Mar 2006 19:13:10 -0800

That's a good idea. Kittens have a very quick turnaround time... you don't need to feed them and a new one is right around the corner.

By: Astro Zombie

Astro Zombie — Wed, 01 Mar 2006 19:17:26 -0800

1. Make cat piano. 2. ??? 3. Profit!

By: lapolla

lapolla — Wed, 01 Mar 2006 19:19:21 -0800

goes so well with the monty python mouse organ: Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you. Ladies and gentlemen. I have in this box twenty-three white mice. Mice which have been painstakingly trained over the past few years, to squeak at a selected pitch. (he raises a mouse by its tail) This is E sharp... and this one is G. You get the general idea. Noe these mice are so arranged upon this rack, that when played in the correct order they will squeak 'The Bells of St Mary's'. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you on the mouse organ 'The Bells of St Mary's'. Thank you. He produces two mallets. He starts striking the mice while singing quietly 'The Bells of St Mary's'. Each downward stroke of the mallet brings a terribly squashing sound and the expiring squeak. It is quite clear that he is slaughtering the mice. The musical effect is poor. After the first few notes people are shouting 'Stop it, stop him someone, Oh my God'. He cheerfully takes a bow. He is hauled off by the floor manager.

By: loquacious

loquacious — Wed, 01 Mar 2006 19:25:09 -0800

Yeah, but kittens change pitch quickly. Even hourly. I strongly suggest starting a cattery to supply the piano with cats of various sizes and ages. On one end of the piano you place a kitten. At the other an old, fat and nasty tomcat. Arrange kittens and cats in a gradiated manner betwixt. The problem with this method is that by the time the kitten has become an old, fat tomcat, it'll be well-poked, more then a little pissed off, and perhaps a little hoarse. Frankly, I'm dubious that such a piano ever existed. You ever try to put an annoyed cat in a box? How about trying to bring together an annoyed cat and any object with moving parts? I'm thinking that the only music being made during all of this was well-sharpened cat claws singing merrily through soft hu-mon flesh. But bonus points for style and an inventive way to annoy cats should be awarded, regardless.

By: hortense

hortense — Wed, 01 Mar 2006 19:25:28 -0800

cat choir

By: smackfu

smackfu — Wed, 01 Mar 2006 19:26:05 -0800

Carol of the Meows (iTMS link but the sample is sufficient to get the gist)

By: loquacious

loquacious — Wed, 01 Mar 2006 19:27:45 -0800

Thanks, lapolla, I'd forgotten about the mouse organ sketch.

By: hortense

hortense — Wed, 01 Mar 2006 19:27:58 -0800

cat sled

By: lapolla

lapolla — Wed, 01 Mar 2006 19:29:10 -0800

you are welcome, loquacious... though, how could anyone, ever, forget the mouse organ?

By: thirteenkiller

thirteenkiller — Wed, 01 Mar 2006 19:29:16 -0800

Protocols expresses that catgut still present within cat gut

By: smackfu

smackfu — Wed, 01 Mar 2006 19:30:58 -0800

Oh wow, the guys who did Carol of the Meows (Guster) actually remade one of their albums as a meow-mix and you can buy it on iTMS. How about that?

By: rob paxon

rob paxon — Wed, 01 Mar 2006 19:36:34 -0800

Thirteenkiller, must you continually wipe the balls of Protocols on request? Have you no self-respect?

By: thirteenkiller

thirteenkiller — Wed, 01 Mar 2006 19:40:32 -0800

I like his balls and also I have self-respect

By: rob paxon

rob paxon — Wed, 01 Mar 2006 19:41:44 -0800

That's OK -- I have enough self-respect for the both of us.

By: thirteenkiller

thirteenkiller — Wed, 01 Mar 2006 19:48:08 -0800

I said I have self-respect!

By: loquacious

loquacious — Wed, 01 Mar 2006 19:55:29 -0800

I like his balls and also I have self-respect For this portion of the test, deconstruct and analyze the above sentence for self-contradiction. Use no more then one paragraph for your response. For 5 extra credit points indicate the typo.

By: rob paxon

rob paxon — Wed, 01 Mar 2006 19:57:07 -0800

Oh sorry Thirteen, I misread through your fiction right to reality. :]

By: rob paxon

rob paxon — Wed, 01 Mar 2006 19:58:11 -0800

loquacious, are you trying to steal my thunder? Don't play Zeus like that.

By: mendel

mendel — Wed, 01 Mar 2006 20:00:29 -0800

I have no idea how these people got their cats wedged into their piano, or why.

By: rob paxon

rob paxon — Wed, 01 Mar 2006 20:02:04 -0800

The why is for the simple pleasure of it all. As for the how, I am currently googling for a step-by-step instructional.

By: i_am_joe's_spleen

i_am_joe's_spleen — Wed, 01 Mar 2006 20:03:46 -0800

So that's where the idea for Marvin Suggs and his Amazing Muppaphone came from.

By: HTuttle

HTuttle — Wed, 01 Mar 2006 20:17:45 -0800

Today they use teenage poptarts instead. Same effect though.

By: loquacious

loquacious — Wed, 01 Mar 2006 20:53:20 -0800

Uh oh, catfight!

By: thirteenkiller

thirteenkiller — Wed, 01 Mar 2006 21:02:19 -0800

Rob you're just jealous.

By: papakwanz

papakwanz — Wed, 01 Mar 2006 21:15:38 -0800

What the fuck are you guys talking about?

By: Astro Zombie

Astro Zombie — Wed, 01 Mar 2006 21:22:14 -0800

It's all about thirteenkiller's self-esteem issues.

By: painquale

painquale — Wed, 01 Mar 2006 23:02:04 -0800

I was planning on posting this Kircher Society page later this week. Everyone: check out the rest of the blog. It's amazing.

By: Scram

Scram — Wed, 01 Mar 2006 23:38:00 -0800

Here is that Meow Mix cat you were looking for, rob paxon... but I don't think she would appreciate a nail in her tail!

By: onlyconnect

onlyconnect — Thu, 02 Mar 2006 03:32:14 -0800

Great post!

By: OmieWise

OmieWise — Thu, 02 Mar 2006 06:19:44 -0800

Cat's have cat guts. Just sayin'.

By: raedyn

raedyn — Thu, 02 Mar 2006 07:15:10 -0800

mr_crash_davis: That song was only annoying before. Now it will be hilarious. Until the joke gets old. Thanks, I think.

By: MotherTucker

MotherTucker — Thu, 02 Mar 2006 09:40:17 -0800

I have been working on a new version of the "baby" grand piano. It's just difficult to get those babies to scream in tune.

By: Astro Zombie

Astro Zombie — Thu, 02 Mar 2006 10:01:53 -0800

That's why god made so many of them. You'll eventually find at least an octave's worth.

Comments on: *Meow meow HISS* Ah, yes. Needs tuning, madam.

*Meow meow HISS* Ah, yes. Needs tuning, madam.

By: mr_crash_davis

By: rob paxon

By: thirteenkiller

By: rob paxon

By: Astro Zombie

By: lapolla

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By: hortense

By: smackfu

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By: lapolla

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By: rob paxon

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Comments on: Meow meow HISS Ah, yes. Needs tuning, madam.

Meow meow HISS Ah, yes. Needs tuning, madam.