Comments on: Actually Useful French

Actually Useful French

BuddhaInABucket — Thu, 06 Apr 2006 19:12:16 -0800

Phrases you'd really like to know before you go to France. Special bonus how to be an obnoxious lover in French.

By: scblackman

scblackman — Thu, 06 Apr 2006 19:23:30 -0800

Remerciez la qualité de ce poteau. Il n'y a aucune manière que j'aurais appris ceci d'un film de Jerry Lewis. Ce sont très utiles.

By: bukharin

bukharin — Thu, 06 Apr 2006 19:30:56 -0800

Lame.

By: mr_roboto

mr_roboto — Thu, 06 Apr 2006 19:37:05 -0800

I thought it was funny. He has a charming authorial voice.

By: lupus_yonderboy

lupus_yonderboy — Thu, 06 Apr 2006 19:56:08 -0800

I laughed. In particular, some of the French translations are much funnier than the English version. For example, "Stop bothering me!" becomes "Parle à mon cul, ma tête est malade" (talk to my butt, my head is sick).

By: homunculus

homunculus — Thu, 06 Apr 2006 20:03:18 -0800

Underpants.

By: furtive

furtive — Thu, 06 Apr 2006 20:07:33 -0800

If you're going to use phrases like that, I sure hope you're on good enough terms with the other person to at least conjugate them in the second tense and not the polite vous crap you see there.

By: furtive

furtive — Thu, 06 Apr 2006 20:10:10 -0800

Ta mère était un hamster et ton père sentait des baies de sureau.

By: nebulawindphone

nebulawindphone — Thu, 06 Apr 2006 20:12:09 -0800

I still prefer these.

By: psmealey

psmealey — Thu, 06 Apr 2006 20:14:40 -0800

Those phrases, while amusing, are very junior year abroad. While they are for the most part grammatically correct, they are pretty awkward, almost slang (argot) free and pretty much devoid of colloquialisms.

By: psmealey

psmealey — Thu, 06 Apr 2006 20:16:41 -0800

I bought a great book over there when I was a student that had similar expressions in it, but the phrasing was much more au courant, so to speak. I'll see if I can find it on-line.

By: psmealey

psmealey — Thu, 06 Apr 2006 20:25:40 -0800

To wit: "I think the dress is too small for you." "Je pense que la robe est trop petite pour vous" The French are so direct, that if one were to say the above, it could almost be considered polite, whereas an Anglophone would likely find that impolitic or even insulting. A French person would be more likely to say that some is too fat (trop grosse) for the dress. There is kind of a simple beauty in how the French insult one another, but that generally takes the form or a play on words, rather than making a point with an intentional understatement as Brits and Americans more typically do.

By: zadcat

zadcat — Thu, 06 Apr 2006 20:43:25 -0800

The zompist phrasebook might also appeal to folks who like this kind of humour.

By: ?!

?! — Thu, 06 Apr 2006 20:44:11 -0800

scblackman: "Thank the quality of this fence post" There is nothing more humorous than a lousy translation program. Wow, an eight-year old "humor site." How in the hell have we missed that in the previous 50,704 threads? Seriously, it seems we often have these "make fun of the French" comments. Why do Americans seem to have such a hard-on for the French? Who here is up for insulting Italians? The Irish? Come on. There has got to a "best of the web" making fun of Liechtenstein. Mine those veins harder people. There has got to be some comedy gold left.

By: oaf

oaf — Thu, 06 Apr 2006 21:12:17 -0800

Some of the zompist phrasebook's items are purposeful mistranslations and say nothing even resembling what the English sentence is. Just to warn you.

By: George_Spiggott

George_Spiggott — Thu, 06 Apr 2006 22:36:35 -0800

This also has the occasional "Hungarian Phrasebook Sketch" wildly inaccurate translation:

"Stop bothering me!" "Parle à mon cul, ma tête est malade"

Literally "Speak to my ass, my head's not feeling well."

By: George_Spiggott

George_Spiggott — Thu, 06 Apr 2006 22:37:41 -0800

... or what lupus yonderboy said ...

By: Steven C. Den Beste

Steven C. Den Beste — Thu, 06 Apr 2006 23:19:16 -0800

European travel guide.

By: Wolof

Wolof — Thu, 06 Apr 2006 23:50:29 -0800

Nul points.

By: slimepuppy

slimepuppy — Fri, 07 Apr 2006 03:42:33 -0800

My hovercraft is full of eels.

By: creeky

creeky — Fri, 07 Apr 2006 04:05:11 -0800

This kind of thing makes me wonder why Roy "Chubby" Brown and Bernard Manning never really made it in the States.

By: languagehat

languagehat — Fri, 07 Apr 2006 04:22:37 -0800

Lame. Zompist is infinitely funnier.

By: Sijeka

Sijeka — Fri, 07 Apr 2006 05:13:24 -0800

As a french person i certainly thought that the answer to 'Do you have anything to declare?' being, 'Vive l'algérie' was so funny that i had to die laughing.

By: patricio

patricio — Fri, 07 Apr 2006 07:09:44 -0800

Even the BBC does it better: How to start a fight and how to pull in French

By: Artw

Artw — Fri, 07 Apr 2006 09:44:03 -0800

creeky - They fucking love benny Hill. God knows why.

By: mr_crash_davis

mr_crash_davis — Fri, 07 Apr 2006 16:45:53 -0800

Il y a un poisson dans votre pantalons.