Ghyslain off the Chizain

April 18, 2006 6:47 AM

Star Wars Kid Finally Gets Settlement Claiming to have been unable to attend school on account of being more famous than the kid who played the real Anakin Skywalker, Ghyslain "Star Wars Kid" Raza (original thread) finally gets his cut off of the three kids responsible for making sure he'll never, ever get a date. Sadly, the situation got so bad Ghyslain "let himself go and no longer lifted weights to keep fit." So much for a sequel.
posted by TheFarSeid (77 comments total)

"that's the problem with the Internet. Things travel fast."
Damn you, internet! can't you leave a poor weightlifting star wars fan alone?
posted by TechnoLustLuddite at 6:58 AM on April 18, 2006

He has an awesome name though. Ghyslain...
posted by Acey at 7:07 AM on April 18, 2006

how much money did he make for being a dork? the article doesn't say.
posted by wakko at 7:09 AM on April 18, 2006

Yet another unfortunate chapter in this kid's life. Remember when people initially heard the circumstances that led to the tape and opted to send him gifts? I understand that he should have the right to keep his life private, but he was given a great opportunity to have his fifteen minutes of fame. Next time, someone should convince his parents to call an agent before a lawyer.
posted by mikeh at 7:11 AM on April 18, 2006

I sense a great disturbance in the Force... as though suddenly millions of YouTube accounts cried out in terror and were suddenly banninated.
posted by loquacious at 7:15 AM on April 18, 2006

It's probably for the best. You can't just give away Jedi secrets like that.
posted by NationalKato at 7:18 AM on April 18, 2006

but he was given a great opportunity to have his fifteen minutes of fame.

And by god, there's nothing more important than that.
posted by XQUZYPHYR at 7:19 AM on April 18, 2006

He has an awesome name though. Ghyslain...

Yeah he does, but he had to go and ruin it by acting like a tard.
posted by greasy_skillet at 7:23 AM on April 18, 2006

Now Mr. gun safety himself, the DEA agent who claimed he was the only person in the room professional enough to carry a weapon and then proceeded to shoot himself in the foot, is suing as well.
posted by caddis at 7:25 AM on April 18, 2006

Take that, liberal media!
posted by rxrfrx at 7:25 AM on April 18, 2006

What a dick.
posted by Artw at 7:31 AM on April 18, 2006

Let's cut off our ears and mail them to him as revenge for his spurning of our loving advances.
posted by XQUZYPHYR at 7:37 AM on April 18, 2006

Man, I didn't know you could sue for making an ass of yourself and being humiliated in return. I'm gonna be rich, rich I tell you!
posted by substrate at 7:42 AM on April 18, 2006

I actually sympathize with the guy. It's like he's stuck in perpetual middle school and he's the target of many, many jokes.
posted by spiderskull at 7:42 AM on April 18, 2006

So if one kid embarrasses another kid (maybe with a thorough mocking in gym class? starting a rumor or nickname? revealing found love letters?) so that it becomes equally "unbearable" to attend class, it is now legally actionable? Even with the statute of limitations, there must be a few million dorks ready to sue their old school nemeses.
posted by pracowity at 7:45 AM on April 18, 2006

From now on you shall be called Greedo young Jedi.
posted by homodigitalis at 7:46 AM on April 18, 2006

Next time, someone should convince his parents to call an agent before a lawyer.

I second that ; Jackass was a moderate success as Napoleon Dynamite, so SWK looks fine for cameos
posted by elpapacito at 7:47 AM on April 18, 2006

Ghyslain should've pulled a Milonakis.
posted by NationalKato at 7:47 AM on April 18, 2006

I'd second the advice from the previous thread that Ghyslain should join a martial arts school... that way after a few years he'd actually be able to do a good job with a staff/lightsaber.

Easy to give advice to a high school kid who's been teased to death, I know.
posted by anthill at 8:34 AM on April 18, 2006

hate to say it, but I don't see what the problem is. People are laughing at the video becuase it could have been them (or at least me, I mean I'm twirling my beer bottle like a lightsaber and jabbing it into my crotch right now =) I mean how many people are genuinely looking at this and going what a dork and how many are going, "damn that kid is cool?" I always thought it was pretty cool and would have been thrilled to find myself at the center of so much attention in school. We all spent a lot of time as children... or really I mean come on let's face it as adults too... pretending to be things. That one kid happened to video tape himself acting like a Jedi hardly makes him special. I remember once going to my college roommates house and his mom played entire tapes he had made at 7 of himself narrating himself into Star Wars... now those were funny... I still imagine myself in tons of roles from almost any book I read to movies to video games etc. This is a perfectly natural use of the imagination to pretend we're in a piece of fiction. How is this any different than the kids who become furries in SL or play world of warcraft or just the dude down the street thinking what he'd do in the latest John Grisham novel? As Woody Allen showed in Play it Again Sam, we're all in dialogue in our heads, in virtual relationships, Ghislian's seemed healthy and rather entertaining that he feels so ashamed that it was exposed seems ridicilous and that people would treat him any differently for this is one of the dumbest things I've ever heard.
posted by aljones15 at 8:38 AM on April 18, 2006

aljones15, I agree that Ghyslain's behavior is healthy, entertaining, and reminiscent of my own childhood flights of imagination.

However, I think you might forget - or experienced differently - what it means to be a target of unwanted attention in high school. Kids are very cruel in those formative years.
posted by NationalKato at 8:42 AM on April 18, 2006

on the internets, everyone knows you're a dork...
posted by Eirixon at 8:59 AM on April 18, 2006

Kids are very cruel in those formative years.

True. But would you have sued? Would your parents?

I'd hate to be in Ghyslain's shoes. But the kid had a couple of ways of dealing with it, and he could have learned to laugh at himself. I contrast this kid's lawsuit with the 5-year-old Boston girl who forgave the man who crippled her, and I've gotta say, it seems like Ghyslain's hurting himself a lot more than he's hurting his classmates by reacting the way he has.
posted by cribcage at 9:13 AM on April 18, 2006

Oh definitely, cribcage. I'm in no way advocating legal recourse for his humiliation. I am, however, disputing any opinion that this might have been a pleasant high school experience for Ghyslain. Unless the high school experience has turned 180% from when I was there in the late 80s.
posted by NationalKato at 9:20 AM on April 18, 2006

It's still funny after all this time though isn't it. Such grace.
posted by gfrobe at 9:32 AM on April 18, 2006

But, NationalKato, SWK could have parlayed that tape into an invitation onto Letterman with Natalie Portman if he'd hired an agent instead of an attorney. It's kind of hard to pick on a kid who hung out with Natalie Portman in the green room.
posted by jmgorman at 9:36 AM on April 18, 2006

Thank god. * draws shuddering breath of relief * As this boy suffered so has the world. Now the healing can begin.

Darfur? WTF is Darfur?
posted by George_Spiggott at 9:40 AM on April 18, 2006

Missed it on preview, but jmgorman, that's brilliant.
posted by George_Spiggott at 9:43 AM on April 18, 2006

Good for him---the tape will live forever online and throughout his life it'll pop up -- all because of assholes. Imagine what that'll be like--he's 30, and at work, and one day all his coworkers are giggling everytime they look at him bec one of them found it and passed it around and his bosses decided maybe he shouldn't be the one promoted...or he's dating someone and they google him...

This will follow him around forever. Of course, he's going to have to learn to deal with it and be funny about it (he really really is going to have to), but it's not great.
posted by amberglow at 9:44 AM on April 18, 2006

he'll never, ever get a date

But what about the StarWarsKid groupies?
posted by CynicalKnight at 10:00 AM on April 18, 2006

"He said he was diagnosed with depression by a pedopsychiatrist at Montreal's Sainte-Justine Hospital and his lawyers, in their fillings, said they wanted to have a psychiatrist and a psychologist testify..."

Well see, there's another problem if the lawyers are communicating through their fillings.
posted by SteveInMaine at 10:05 AM on April 18, 2006

amberglow, I can just as easily imagine some future boss or romantic interest saying, "Oh my god, you were Star Wars Kid? That's awesome!" I can also imagine someone saying, "You were Star Wars Kid? Dude, suing those guys was really uncool." Add me to the camp that says that Ghyslain could have really profited if he had played his cards right.
posted by Faint of Butt at 10:20 AM on April 18, 2006

This will follow him around forever.

Well, let's remember none of this would have happened if Ghyslain hadn't made the tape and left it lying around. There's a difference between saying his classmates did something wrong and saying that they're 100% responsible for the Star Wars Kid meme. Call it "joint liability" or "differentiated responsibility," but the whole ruckus started because Ghyslain made a mistake. It's not like his classmates broke into his bedroom and stole the tape.

Anyway, even if you're right, he had to choose what would follow him forever: that he was embarrassed but handled it with dignity and good humor (and maybe, made lemonade out of his 15 minutes), or that he was so ashamed by the tape that he sued.

There's another famous Internet video of a guy playing air drums to Metallica, which was also released by a third party unbeknownst to the video's star; when he was tracked down and told that people were making money off his homemade video, his response was, "Hey, if people are enjoying it, that's cool." I'd rather have his attitude than Ghyslain's couple of thousand bucks.
posted by cribcage at 10:24 AM on April 18, 2006

the real Anakin Skywalker!
posted by muckster at 10:30 AM on April 18, 2006

He worked out? Huh.
posted by graventy at 11:06 AM on April 18, 2006

He has an awesome name though. Ghyslain...

I named my KOTOR character Ghyslain.
posted by EarBucket at 11:09 AM on April 18, 2006

graventy finally states what everyone was thinking.
posted by NationalKato at 11:09 AM on April 18, 2006

There goes his chance at a guest spot on "I [heart] the '00s."
posted by brundlefly at 11:10 AM on April 18, 2006

I always suspected that it was more his parents' doing than his.
posted by borkingchikapa at 11:23 AM on April 18, 2006

Well, let's remember none of this would have happened if Ghyslain hadn't made the tape and left it lying around.

Well, let's remember none of this would have happened if she hadn't been wearing a provocative miniskirt out in public at a bar.
posted by felix at 11:29 AM on April 18, 2006

Yes, because it's EXACTLY like rape.
posted by Artw at 11:31 AM on April 18, 2006

Mr. Laflamme said he discovered the tape in April of 2003, when he took school equipment to film a varsity football game.

Remember after Columbine, when everyone was so shocked--"how could they have done this, OMG"... all I could think was, "Hey, I've had that fantasy, too." And I know I'm not the only one, either.

So, really? No sympathy for the geek who just sued the beejesus (I hope) out of a bunch of jocks who made his life hell? I think it rocks, myself.
posted by Squid Voltaire at 11:34 AM on April 18, 2006

Arrested Developments' parody of the kid was genius.
posted by AMWKE at 11:43 AM on April 18, 2006

He has an awesome name though. Ghyslain...

He has the name of the type of kid destined to say
"... oh yeah... I'll show them!"

I feel for the kid. But lets face it. It's his parents suing people. It's his parents that made him a dork.

"Hey, I've had that fantasy, too."

Blowing a fifteen year old girls brains out because you couldn't shoot the "jocks" that ran faster. You had that fantasy?

The Columbine assholes never actually shot the people they said supposedly "made their lives a living hell." You realize that, right?
posted by tkchrist at 12:07 PM on April 18, 2006

So, really? No sympathy for the geek who just sued the beejesus (I hope) out of a bunch of jocks who made his life hell? I think it rocks, myself.

Nope, no sympathy. Maybe he wouldn't be such a "geek" if could take a joke.
posted by delmoi at 12:12 PM on April 18, 2006

Making a tape and leaving it lying around is a horrible mistake and Ghyslain deserved to be punished with worldwide humiliation for this unimaginable crime against humanity. Really, what was he thinking, making a tape. And leaving it lying around. The absolute nerve of some people.
posted by drew3d at 12:16 PM on April 18, 2006

Now Mr. gun safety himself, the DEA agent who claimed he was the only person in the room professional enough to carry a weapon and then proceeded to shoot himself in the foot, is suing as well.

Jesus, he shoots himself in the foot, and then just keeps lecturing.
posted by delmoi at 12:19 PM on April 18, 2006

Good for him---the tape will live forever online and throughout his life it'll pop up -- all because of assholes. Imagine what that'll be like--he's 30, and at work, and one day all his coworkers are giggling everytime they look at him bec one of them found it and passed it around and his bosses decided maybe he shouldn't be the one promoted...or he's dating someone and they google him...

So what? You've never done anything embarrassing? If I were to see that I'd think "heh, that's funny" If I were to read about how he sued people over it, I'd be a lot less sympathetic. That kind of thing really would make me not want to hang out with him.
posted by delmoi at 12:21 PM on April 18, 2006

This will follow him around forever

I'm with cribcage on this, what will follow him around forever is how negatively he and his parents handled the situation, not the actual video itself, which was quite endearing. It could have been really fun for him, both in the short and long term, but clearly this kid has not been raised to laugh at himself or roll with the punches. Which is kind of un-Canadian, come to think of it. We're pretty darn good at making fun of ourselves.
posted by zarah at 1:07 PM on April 18, 2006

My first inclination is to wonder why he doesn't just laugh at himself, along with everyone else. He's robbing future moments of precious entertainment from millions of potential admirers. But if you don't want to be an entertainer, if you don't want to be the focus of attention, should you have to be? Is it okay if some assholes decide otherwise and tip the domino that turns you into a household name (on the internets)? He's not cool for suing, but it wasn't his responsibility to be cool. William Hung asked for it and got it. This guy didn't and 'struck back'. For as funny as it is to make someone else into a worldwide joke, it's just as funny to sue the fuckers and put a lien on their parent's houses. I congratulate all of them.
posted by airguitar at 1:07 PM on April 18, 2006

Correct me if I'm wrong, but the story goes like this

1. Kids post found tape.

2. Video professionals edit it to add in star wars effects.

3. Sites like ebaum, fark, youtube, etc either link to it or host it while selling subscriptions and banner advertisements.

Why aren't they being sued? Or the graphics professionals who took a boring video of a fat kid from some website and added in effects and sounds, hosted it, and promoted it? Its one thing for me to release a video and its another for the video to get picked up by commercial interests and artists and turned into this week's crazy meme without permission. Ebaumsworld still hosts it now. Why are they free from litigation?

In a different article (this is actually old news) the settlement was something like $300,000 dollars to Ghyslain's family. There were three defedants so without further details that means 100k each. So his "tormentors" don't get to go to college or their parents lose their homes while ebaum, collegehumor, etc are laughing all the way to the bank. Yeah, that seems fair. If there are "tormentors" in this sad little story its this web-based industry of 'show me teh funny' crap that encourages the showing of embarassing videos without permission.
posted by skallas at 1:14 PM on April 18, 2006

zarah : "I'm with cribcage on this, what will follow him around forever is how negatively he and his parents handled the situation, not the actual video itself, which was quite endearing."

I dunno. Things like "kid flailing madly with stick imitating Jedi" stick better in the mind than "kid suing other kids for releasing embarassing video". Sure, for a few months, I think what will go around with him is how he handled the situation, but in the 5 year, 10 year, 20 year long run, it's the flailing that will win by a mile.

airguitar : "For as funny as it is to make someone else into a worldwide joke, it's just as funny to sue the fuckers and put a lien on their parent's houses. I congratulate all of them."

Amen.
posted by Bugbread at 1:14 PM on April 18, 2006

Hmm, airguitar, you bring up a good & funny point! :D
posted by zarah at 1:14 PM on April 18, 2006

skallas : "If there are 'tormentors' in this sad little story its this web-based industry of "show me teh funny" crap that encourages the showing of embarassing videos without permission."

No, if there are "tormentors" in this sad little story it's the TV shows which raised and formed the tastes of the site admins who created the sites of "show me teh funny" crap that encourages the showing of embarassing videos without permission.
posted by Bugbread at 1:21 PM on April 18, 2006

No, wait, it's the fault of the industrial revolution, for increasing the standard of living, resulting in free time, which leads to "show me teh funny" crap
posted by Bugbread at 1:23 PM on April 18, 2006

Me, I blame the printing press for giving the peasants the knowledge to rise up against their masters.
posted by drezdn at 1:32 PM on April 18, 2006

Me, I blame the printing press for giving the peasants the knowledge to rise up against their masters.

I would have a biting and witty reply were I not an illiterate posting from Searle's English Room.
posted by sonofsamiam at 1:42 PM on April 18, 2006

Right, cause we all know progress == copyright infringment and unlawful profiteering.
posted by skallas at 1:43 PM on April 18, 2006

skallas : "Right, cause we all know progress == copyright infringment and unlawful profiteering."

Yes, we do know that, but unfortunately, can't get our elected representatives to agree with us about it. I blame Michael Eisner.
posted by Bugbread at 1:52 PM on April 18, 2006

On a slightly more serious note:

skallas : "Correct me if I'm wrong, but the story goes like this

1. Kids post found tape.

2. Video professionals edit it to add in star wars effects.

3. Sites like ebaum, fark, youtube, etc either link to it or host it while selling subscriptions and banner advertisements."

If memory serves me, you're not wrong, but you're skipping a lot between 1 and 2.

1. Kids post found tape.

2. People send video to eachother by email, and send links to minor hosted sites.

3. Sites like ebaum, fark, youtube, etc either link to it or host it while selling subscriptions and banner advertisements.

4. Video professionals edit it to add in star wars effects.

5. Sites like ebaum, fark, youtube, etc either link to it or host it while selling subscriptions and banner advertisements.

The Star Wars kid was famous before anyone remixed him, and before he got onto ebaumsworld, et al.

Also:

skallas : "Ebaumsworld still hosts it now. Why are they free from litigation? "

There's a ton of stuff on the net about Ebaumsworld, copyright infringement, and litigation. Basically, Ebaum rips off everyone, but only people who don't have the money to go after Ebaum. It's not a defense of Ebaum (guy is a total ass), but it is a bit of an answer to your question.
posted by Bugbread at 1:57 PM on April 18, 2006

Now Mr. gun safety himself, the DEA agent who claimed he was the only person in the room professional enough to carry a weapon and then proceeded to shoot himself in the foot, is suing as well.

The hilarious thing isn't that he shoots himself in the foot (accidents happen) or that he continues to lecture afterwards (he makes the point that acccidents happen, even to trained professionals) ... it's the reaction of the kids when he tries to continue the demo with an M16 - they go berserk. He's yelling, "It's an empty weapon, guys! Listen!" and they're yelling "No, no, no! Put it down!"
posted by zanni at 2:05 PM on April 18, 2006

Yeah, I had heard about that DEA tape, and I expected that the guy would come off like an asshat. But he doesn't: amazing composure, really. He shoots himself in the foot and then goes on to explain how that proves his point....
posted by mr_roboto at 3:30 PM on April 18, 2006

I don't think it matters whether WE think this kid is lame, or unbelievably awesome. What's important is what HE thinks. If he knew how unbelievably awesome he was when he was making the video, then he wouldn't have had a problem with it getting virally transmitted everywhere.

BUT isn't part of what makes him so unbelievably awesome the shame factor involved with making the video?
posted by Laugh_track at 4:36 PM on April 18, 2006

I have no sympathy for the little twat at all, and less for his family, if that's possible. No doubt the whole 'suing for damages' bullshit was more the idea of his parents than his own, but still.

If they'd had a goddamn clue, they could have sold t-shirts and Star Wars Kid merchandise and shit, thrown up a website, gone along with the joke, made some coin, made pudgyboy famous and well-liked in a fifteen-minutes kind of way at the least, and not come off looking like the shitheads they do while financially fucking the families of his three classmates and condemning the kid to a lifetime of derision from everyone.

Pathetic.
posted by stavrosthewonderchicken at 6:25 PM on April 18, 2006

Yeah, I had heard about that DEA tape, and I expected that the guy would come off like an asshat. But he doesn't: amazing composure, really.

Are you nuts? After he discharges the first weapon in a room filled with schoolchildren, he proceeds to begin a similar demonstration with an assault rifle. And amazingly, the adults in the room stand and watch — one of them even hands him the weapon! It takes the children to scream and stop him.

Every adult in that room should have been fired from the school after that tape's release. The guy mistakenly discharges a loaded weapon inside a crowded classroom, and you're going to sit still while he picks up another gun? What the fuck.
posted by cribcage at 7:53 PM on April 18, 2006

Sorry; I wasn't really commenting on his competence, just his composure. You've gotta admit; it's impressive. I had a laptop die on me during a presentation recently, and it was tough to hold things together. I couldn't imagine what it would take to go on talking after taking a bullet...
posted by mr_roboto at 7:57 PM on April 18, 2006

Suing was fair. The jerks published a personal video tape without permission. The question of whether the whole thing could have been played to better advantage for this Ghyslain kid is not relevant.

As for your sympathy for the families of the theives: Ever hear of house insurance? Typically it covers personal liability. But maybe you don't get that kind of insurance on your mobile home, I wouldn't know.
posted by Goofyy at 12:47 AM on April 19, 2006

But maybe you don't get that kind of insurance on your mobile home, I wouldn't know.

What the fuck are you on about?

Suing was fair.

You say fair. I say pathetic. And?

The jerks published a personal video tape without permission.

*sniffle* Those jerks!
posted by stavrosthewonderchicken at 1:32 AM on April 19, 2006

Stavros: I realize some people think it's pathetic to go for redress of grievances, but it's part of this thing we're trying to hang on to, called "civilization". To declare someone pathetic for doing so is really just acting the bully.
posted by Goofyy at 2:20 AM on April 19, 2006

Sorry, but 'redress of grievances' my feathery chicken ass. The culture of litigation is one of the things shitting all over this civilization you prize so highly. Legal recourse because somebody's precious feelings were hurt? A pillar on which society rests? Give me a break.

If that's so, then fuck civilization, say I. I'll go a-huntin' baar up in the narth woods.

Well, the north woods from where I am would be Kamchatka, but you know what I'm saying.
posted by stavrosthewonderchicken at 2:59 AM on April 19, 2006

Does anyone think the kids that got sued are going to leave him alone from now on?

Quite the opposite. They will now actively engage in and encourage the (traditional, non-legal-action-causing) bullying of Mr. Ghyslain.
posted by slimepuppy at 5:23 AM on April 19, 2006

Actually, slimepuppy, I would think at this point in life, they'd have parted ways. They court heard the facts, the jury made the decision.

Stavros: Blame the jury that found for the plaintiff, not some Rethuglican-supported notion of a "culture of litigation" (yea, Torte reform! We can't have the little peepul suing the corporations, it will affect profits!).

Well, the north woods from where I am would be Kamchatka, but you know what I'm saying.

I know what you're saying. Translation: My rhetoric is empty because I'm just a bully talking bullshit.
posted by Goofyy at 6:10 AM on April 19, 2006

Goofyy : "Stavros: Blame the jury that found for the plaintiff, not some Rethuglican-supported notion of a 'culture of litigation' (yea, Torte reform! We can't have the little peepul suing the corporations, it will affect profits!)."

As a liberal, I see this from the other end:

Blame the jury, and the plaintiff, who are involved in this litigation due to a liberal-supported notion of a 'culture of litigation' (We can't have the little people suing the other little people, or worse yet corporations suing the little people, because it's just monetary thuggery to punish people who can't pay for the costliest lawyers).
posted by Bugbread at 7:47 AM on April 19, 2006

I'll go a-huntin' baar up in the narth woods.

Well, the north woods from where I am would be Kamchatka,

You leave those bears alone, they've got enough problems. But maybe there's a market for poacher's gall bladders...
posted by homunculus at 9:42 AM on April 19, 2006

I know what you're saying. Translation: My rhetoric is empty because I'm just a bully talking bullshit.

No, translation is: I was making a joke, you idiot.

Fuck you, son. I was talking about peopele neither of us have ever met or will ever meet before you decided to try and take it personal with your headscratchingly condescending mobile-home jibe, aimed at me, for some reason. There's a bully here, but it ain't fuckin' me.
posted by stavrosthewonderchicken at 1:47 PM on April 19, 2006

Legal recourse because somebody's precious feelings were hurt?

The kid finished high school in a psychiatric ward.
posted by airguitar at 3:26 PM on April 19, 2006

And? Link up the dots for me, airguitar, because I'm just not seeing it.
posted by stavrosthewonderchicken at 11:47 PM on April 19, 2006