You may know me as slobbering honeybaby

April 22, 2006 12:40 AM

The speeches of George Bush, reformed.What if Bush had a crisis of conscience and turned over a new leaf? These speeches, written by school children and read by an impersonator show a mystical world of what might be. via waxy. Hello, waxy!
posted by boo_radley (35 comments total)

Ohmigawd — Zoe Baker is brilliant!! ("Are ya intimidated ... Well, are ya?") The DLC should hire her to do all their spots for the midterm races.
And Jim Meskiman, aka POTUS (or "Monkey Feet"), is spot on!
posted by rob511 at 12:57 AM on April 22, 2006

The impersonator is a scientologist, btw.
posted by puke & cry at 1:01 AM on April 22, 2006 [1 favorite]

"Sir Buttsalot. Don't be intimidated."
posted by brundlefly at 1:45 AM on April 22, 2006

I love the word explode

This post is solid gold.
posted by Ljubljana at 2:16 AM on April 22, 2006

Also...no more homework for kids, because child labor hurts.

Awesome.
posted by piratebowling at 2:34 AM on April 22, 2006

I like how the 7-10 year old kids' speeches outshine W's casual grammar.
posted by Serial Killer Slumber Party at 3:41 AM on April 22, 2006

Very cool. Thanks boo.
posted by sluglicker at 4:38 AM on April 22, 2006

beware children, the twinkies might get ya. it's true

no way a 10 year old wrote that, too funny!
posted by beno at 4:56 AM on April 22, 2006

Wow. Where'd that kid learn the twinkie defense?
posted by youarenothere at 5:26 AM on April 22, 2006

Heh heh. He said Doo-doo Head.
posted by RokkitNite at 6:15 AM on April 22, 2006

I've seen the light. I will no longer harshly critique him or his policies. He has a great excuse.
posted by oddman at 7:00 AM on April 22, 2006

How many of us have posted when our brains were invaded by aliens? Too many, I suspect. And yet we blame the president for acting when he is liekwise suffering alien brain invasion?
posted by Astro Zombie at 7:09 AM on April 22, 2006

Absolutely delightful. Great post, thanks!
posted by Turtles all the way down at 7:17 AM on April 22, 2006

But he's already had that "life-changing event!"
posted by rxrfrx at 7:20 AM on April 22, 2006

Damn good thing our school systems don't indoctrinate the young!!
posted by a3matrix at 7:26 AM on April 22, 2006

Damn good thing our school systems don't indoctrinate the young!!

I think it's more a case of kids being able to see (and being unafraid to point out) that the emperor is naked. What are Bushies gonna do, accuse them of undermining the war effort? "Why, you little traitor!"

Every one of these kids is more insightful than Rush Limbaugh. It's friggin obvious.
posted by edverb at 7:43 AM on April 22, 2006

I was wondering in what context kids were allowed to discuss politics, and noticed that this was paid for by Josh Greene, who apparently takes his income from his job as a waiter and puts it into all sorts of interesting projects like this. I still wonder about the school, and whether parents were asked for permission ahead of time.
posted by scottreynen at 7:58 AM on April 22, 2006

Amazing post....
posted by RufusW at 8:09 AM on April 22, 2006

This is a pretty cool piece from Josh Greene
posted by RufusW at 8:26 AM on April 22, 2006

Er, scottyreynen, children need permission from their parents to talk about politics?
posted by Richard Daly at 8:52 AM on April 22, 2006

Er, scottyreynen, children need permission from their parents to talk about politics?

More specifically, teachers need permission from childrens' parents before having them talk about politics to avoid lawsuits.
posted by scottreynen at 9:16 AM on April 22, 2006

Nonsense.
posted by Astro Zombie at 9:40 AM on April 22, 2006

I loathe Dubya as much as anyone else, but enlisting kids who are too young to understand the issues into the service of a clever Internet stunt strikes me as pretty low. It's not giving the kids a voice, it's using them. Again, I hate George Bush, but I'd be ripshit if someone included my kids in a project like this.
posted by jayder at 10:47 AM on April 22, 2006

jayded.
posted by furtive at 11:06 AM on April 22, 2006

More specifically, teachers need permission from childrens' parents before having them talk about politics to avoid lawsuits.

Uh, since when?
posted by odinsdream at 11:52 AM on April 22, 2006

Uh, since when?

Based on my experience as a teacher, as the child of a teacher, and as the husband of a teacher, I think it's likely a parent would sue a school distict over something like this. I might be wrong, but I wouldn't want to be the teacher testing it out. Parents have sued schools over much less. The lawsuits are generally ridiculous, but schools still need to be careful to avoid them. Schools don't tend to have a lot of extra money to be wasting on lawyers.
posted by scottreynen at 12:16 PM on April 22, 2006

The impressionists Flipper is awesome
posted by lemonfridge at 1:23 PM on April 22, 2006

Based on my experience as a teacher, as the child of a teacher, and as the husband of a teacher, I think it's likely a parent would sue a school distict over something like this. I might be wrong, but I wouldn't want to be the teacher testing it out.
posted by scottreynen

BFD.

Those teachers who will only recite that which is uncontroversial for fear of a law suit, aren't the sort who should be allowed anywhere near kids.
posted by leftcoastbob at 2:12 PM on April 22, 2006

Those teachers who will only recite that which is uncontroversial for fear of a law suit, aren't the sort who should be allowed anywhere near kids.

Sounds great. But where are you planning to find all of these innovative and courageous teachers? And the innovative and courageous school board members willing to support them? And the innovative and courageous politicians willing to fund them?
posted by scottreynen at 3:02 PM on April 22, 2006

I think it is just that it is funny for kids to pretend that such an important authority figure would say anything. Come on, I laughed to think of Bush calling himself "Slobbering Honey-Baby."
posted by jenovus at 4:19 PM on April 22, 2006

"I know I have been a bed president"

oh the slight misspelling of children can bring such joy
posted by The Boy at 4:27 PM on April 22, 2006

Metafilter: Ladi ladi la
posted by kosher_jenny at 10:30 PM on April 22, 2006

BFD.

Those teachers who will only recite that which is uncontroversial for fear of a law suit, aren't the sort who should be allowed anywhere near kids.

Uhh, do you want to make $30,000 a year after putting yourself through years of school (and draining your bank account) only to put your job on the line for your own ideologies? Teaching isn't about indoctrinating children with politics, and politics are always a slippery slope when children are involved. The situation gets a little more lax in high school (I'm talking about US, public school here) but not so in an elementary/middle school situation.
posted by nonmerci at 10:32 PM on April 22, 2006

Also...no more homework for kids, because child labor hurts.

Note that this line, at the end of the first mp3 file, doesn't appear on the corresponding submission text.
posted by nobody at 1:41 AM on April 23, 2006

But where are you planning to find all of these innovative and courageous teachers? And the innovative and courageous school board members willing to support them? And the innovative and courageous politicians willing to fund them?

In my own town, or so I desperately dream.
posted by mikeh at 7:18 AM on April 24, 2006