Agog in a sea of usefulness.

June 6, 2006 6:39 AM

This painting will not set you agog until you realize it's an early design for a self-righting ship by a man somewhat obsessed. Similarly, this cap pattern is pretty simple, but it represents some deep geek knowledge. In other words, digital artisans can seem pretentiously empty under the physical weight of a carefully considered compulsion.
posted by If I Had An Anus (19 comments total)

From the "Five boats ready to sail" section: My goal is to design a sailing system that would give the Viking sailors the most protection from the sea while sailing.

As long as you're planning to go back in time, be sure to bring along some lead-lined suits to counterract the atomic bazookas.
posted by Smart Dalek at 6:47 AM on June 6, 2006

Great use of the monkeys smoking tags! Excellent post.
posted by OmieWise at 7:06 AM on June 6, 2006

Smoking Monkeys, and Maritime Naive Art? Very nice post indeed.
posted by jrb223 at 7:22 AM on June 6, 2006

I was going to try to make a serious comment, then I read a few more paragraphs of the second link. GREAT use of the donkeys and monkeys tag.
posted by b1tr0t at 7:37 AM on June 6, 2006

Buliwyf: 'Lo, there do I see my father. 'Lo, there do I see...
Herger the Joyous: My mother, and my sisters, and my brothers.
Buliwyf: 'Lo, there do I see...
Herger the Joyous: The line of my people...
Edgtho the Silent: Back to the beginning.
Weath the Musician: 'Lo, they do call to me.
Ahmed Ibn Fahdlan: They bid me take my place among them.
Buliwyf: Iin the halls of Valhalla...
Ahmed Ibn Fahdlan: Where the brave...
Herger the Joyous: May live...
Ahmed Ibn Fahdlan: ...forever.

-13th Warrior (Eaters of the Dead)
posted by humboldt32 at 7:42 AM on June 6, 2006

"Make up of Oseberg size ship crew:...
...Five people with Viking Navy watch usage skills. (Young strong girls are fine.) "
posted by Jofus at 8:19 AM on June 6, 2006

seems like that would cause a lot of problems in crosswindws.
posted by delmoi at 8:21 AM on June 6, 2006

Since I probably can't type 4 words without the NSA's computer system tagging me as a geek, I'll reveal that Þóra (4th link) and I run in similar circles (both SCA Laurels).

From my own experiences, you start out playing dress-up and beating people with sticks. Then you decide you need a better belt or something and since you're fairly handy, you decide to make something really cool. So you do some research, get your materials together and set out to make a cool medieval belt with custom mounts and everything.

And fail miserably.

It's a humbling moment when you catch on to the fact that an illiterate guy from 600 years ago, who lived in a house made, mostly, out of mud and horse shit, and whose entire tool set would fit in a milk crate could do things that you, with the aid of a library, the internet, and a basement full of tools can not.

At this point you can decide you don't care about it that much, you can assume that anything they could do that you can't must have been achieved with the intervention of alien astronauts, or you can screw around with it for a while and try to figure out how they managed to do jobs that we would use a CNC lathe for.
posted by Kid Charlemagne at 8:21 AM on June 6, 2006 [2 favorites]

Ayie!

I lost my beating people with sticks and fit in a milk crate links. Revel in the geekery!
posted by Kid Charlemagne at 8:26 AM on June 6, 2006

Very nice post. Well written, interesting and slightly cryptic. Thank you, IF I HAD AN ANUS.
posted by benATthelocust at 9:07 AM on June 6, 2006

"In other words, digital artisans can seem pretentiously empty under the physical weight of a carefully considered compulsion."

Actually, I rather think digital artisans can often seem pretentiously empty entirely on their own merits, thanks.


Also.... the SCA is full of nerdlingers wasting precious time, energy, and meagre talents to supplant reality with a ridiculously and unrealistically mythologized and romanticized notion of Medieval culture that I frankly find laughable, yet sickening.


Also....



AN-TIR!!!
posted by stenseng at 9:57 AM on June 6, 2006

Am I being thick or does the shift from Viking hats to digital wank make sense in a way that the subsequent shift to fag-shitting donkeys does not?

Hey ho, I am enjoying this confusion.
posted by jack_mo at 10:02 AM on June 6, 2006

This painting will not set you agog until...

Yeah? Yeah? Until what? I'm dying to be set agog! I can't wait! This is so exciting!

...until you realize it's an early design for a self-righting ship by a man somewhat obsessed.

Oh.

Bloody Vikings.
posted by pracowity at 12:37 PM on June 6, 2006

Looked up the 9622 tag, thinking it would hold a clue to this cryptic post. There's a 9622.net site with a monkey logo and a monkey dressed up in a Satan outfit in honor of today being 666. Am more baffled than ever. Can somebody explain? Pleez.
posted by nickyskye at 2:45 PM on June 6, 2006

psst, nicky
posted by If I Had An Anus at 5:32 PM on June 6, 2006

If I had an anus
I'd anus in the morning
I'd anus in the evening
All over this land
I'd anus out danger
I'd anus out a warning
I'd anus out love between my brothers and my sisters
All over this land

.
posted by sluglicker at 7:37 PM on June 6, 2006

The dude with the self-righting Viking ship? He also has it hydroplaning. Check out the area just above the self-righting diagrams...
posted by five fresh fish at 8:57 PM on June 6, 2006

If I Had An Anus, Ah ha. You're the best. Thank you for explaining!

posted by nickyskye at 10:35 PM on June 6, 2006

*blushes*
posted by If I Had An Anus at 4:26 AM on June 7, 2006