Zarqawi dead; number of legs not reported
June 8, 2006 4:57 AM Subscribe
Boogeyman down. Abu Musab al-Zarqawi (SFW), who has served the role of boogeyman for U.S. forces in Iraq for several years, though the U.S. has admitted he is not associated with the international Al Qaeda organization, appears to be deceased. "We have been able to identify al-Zarqawi by fingerprint verification, facial recognition and known scars." No word on how many legs he has (the U.S. stated that he had a leg amputated in Baghdad, and used that "fact" as part of the buildup to war). Reportedly, U.S. forces are already seeking a new person to perform the role of Emmanuel Goldstein during the Two Minutes Hate.
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