Triumph der Blondes
June 22, 2006 5:18 PM   Subscribe

The Hitler vs. Coulter Quiz. Identify the quotes--Ann Coulter or Adolph Hitler?
posted by zardoz (71 comments total) 1 user marked this as a favorite
 
And, yeah, I've Godwinned my own post just by posting it...so you don't have to!
posted by zardoz at 5:20 PM on June 22, 2006


I got 13 right. Simple rule, if the language is at all sophisticated it's not Anne Coulter writing it.
posted by Grimgrin at 5:23 PM on June 22, 2006


I was going to say the same thing, Grimgrim.
posted by brundlefly at 5:24 PM on June 22, 2006


Coulter: Like Hitler, but less sophisticated!

That sounds about right.
posted by mr.curmudgeon at 5:25 PM on June 22, 2006


Or, if America is mentioned, it ain't hitler. I wanted a challenge.
posted by jrb223 at 5:26 PM on June 22, 2006


Grimgrin's correct -- if the quote uses big words, pick Hitler. If it doesn't, pick Coulter. 100% correct!
posted by verb at 5:27 PM on June 22, 2006


I also got 13 - the last one threw me.
posted by fleetmouse at 5:30 PM on June 22, 2006


The blonde beast, indeed.
posted by joe lisboa at 5:30 PM on June 22, 2006


I wonder what took so long for this thing to make the blue.

It's still pretty funny. Luckily, Coulter lacks charm. She can be as outrageous as she wants and even Fox treats it more like entertainment than reality. Think Billy Carter, with boobs and a bleach. They would make a lovely couple.
posted by caddis at 5:31 PM on June 22, 2006


im disturbed by how similiar this is.
posted by Tryptophan-5ht at 5:34 PM on June 22, 2006


Another 'x or Hitler' quiz?

Someone should make a 'MetaFilter or Hitler' quiz sometime. I bet it wouldn't be all that hard to make it quite difficult -- the Hitler quotes given in that link, for example, are hardly egregious.

Basically, Hitler said lots of perfectly normal things -- there isn't some kind of essence of pure evil in every word he ever spoke, and it's pretty stupid to act like there is. The man painted pictures of dogs, for goodness sake.
posted by reklaw at 5:34 PM on June 22, 2006 [1 favorite]


Hmm, looks like Hitler was the one talking about American liberals. I got those two wrong.
posted by Citizen Premier at 5:35 PM on June 22, 2006


I saw the word "liberal" in most of the questions and just assumed it would be Ann Coulter for those... I assumed incorrectly.
posted by hodyoaten at 5:38 PM on June 22, 2006


Twelve correct. Pretty easy. If it says "America", it's quite likely Coulter. But other than that, it is as Grimgrin and mr.curmudgeon say.

I suppose the point is that both Coulter and Hitler use the rhetorical tactic of straw-scapegoating heavily. Probably fairly common among demagogues of many stripes.
posted by weston at 5:54 PM on June 22, 2006


This would be hilarious if it wasn't so damned sad.
posted by graventy at 5:54 PM on June 22, 2006


Dammit, I lost my title, but I was pointing out her book is #3 in sales.
posted by graventy at 5:55 PM on June 22, 2006


Or, if America is mentioned, it ain't hitler.

Oddly enough, no, one of the Hitler quotes is about liberal hatred of America.

Doesn't make it any better, though. The quiz is tricky in places, but it doesn't show that Ann Coulter is indistinguishable from Hitler. It just shows that you can find quotes from Hitler that sound 'only' as unhinged as Ann Coulter.

Crap post.
posted by moss at 5:56 PM on June 22, 2006


It would be harder if you changed all Coulter "liberals" references to "International Jewry," or vice versa. Or "America" to "Deutschland."

Although I suppose it could be just as hard distinguishing Hitler from Mr Rogers, just replace alll MR refs to "feelings that make you mad" with " bloodsucking Jew leeches." Someone should do that, that would be a fun quiz.
posted by stupidsexyFlanders at 5:58 PM on June 22, 2006


But who has the better legs? And should legs simply be enough?
posted by econous at 5:58 PM on June 22, 2006


What a fucking bitch. There, I said it.
posted by pmbuko at 5:58 PM on June 22, 2006


But who has the better legs? And should legs simply be enough?

Dark horse candidate:

Henry Kissinger
How I'm missing yer
You're so chubby and so neat
With your funny clothes and your squishy nose
You're like a German parakeet
All right so people say that you don't care
But you've got nicer legs than Hitler
And bigger tits than Cher

Henry Kissinger
How I'm missing yer
And wishing you were here
posted by Meatbomb at 6:07 PM on June 22, 2006


Coulter too, pmbuko
posted by PlusDistance at 6:08 PM on June 22, 2006


stupidsexyFlanders writes "Although I suppose it could be just as hard distinguishing Hitler from Mr Rogers, just replace alll MR refs to 'feelings that make you mad' with ' bloodsucking Jew leeches.' Someone should do that, that would be a fun quiz."

That's a brilliant idea.
posted by brundlefly at 6:09 PM on June 22, 2006


Grimgrim's approach worked for me as well. Hitler's rhetoric (or the translation thereof) seems more refined.
posted by Dr. Zira at 6:13 PM on June 22, 2006


Just so everyone knows, this is the original version of the quiz. The mirrored version doesn't include this (kind of important) paragraph:

For this quiz I've replaced some of Hitler's pro-Aryan and anti-Semitic language with the words, "America", "Democrat", "liberal", and "the liberal media" to make the Coulter quotes a little more difficult to spot.

Like I said, kind of important.
posted by dw at 6:15 PM on June 22, 2006


Wow, dk -- lame and deceptive. The authors somehow found it hard to get across the message that Ann Coulter is an attention-whoring nutcase? It's like shooting fish in a barrel bucket.

...with a laser cannon.

pewpewpew

posted by spiderwire at 6:30 PM on June 22, 2006


I posted this to Metachat yesterday and some folks
questioned the authenticity of the supposed Hitler quotes. I wonder if the author of the quiz didn't massage the quotes slightly, putting in "liberal" where Hitler said "jew," for instance. Anyone know?
posted by LarryC at 6:30 PM on June 22, 2006


Religious apologetics needs Ann Coulter. Most of them are men who made the choice to be heterosexual.
posted by Brian B. at 6:30 PM on June 22, 2006


Hitler uses much more figurative language "Garbage pails of the vilest slanders"? Come on..
posted by delmoi at 6:40 PM on June 22, 2006


11 right. hitler was more eloquent.


i'm just gonna flat out say it. coulter is a slanderous, inarticulate, self-obsessed harlot. if hitler was more eloquent then thats a fucking horror in and of itself... i mean, has anyone ever skimmed a chapter of mein kamf!? that shit is TERRIBLE... i couldn't even understand it!
posted by Doorstop at 6:41 PM on June 22, 2006


The ones I got wrong:

"Hence it is that at the present time the liberal is the great agitator for the complete destruction of America. Whenever we read of attacks against America taking place in any part of the world the liberal is always the instigator." -- I didn't expect hitler to talk about the US.

"These scum manufacture more than three quarters of the so-called 'public opinion,'...To give an accurate description of this process and depict it in all its falsehood and improbability, one would have to write volumes." -- This wasn't too flowery and it mentioned writing, so I thought it would be coulter

"The truth is another hateful "bourgeois institution."...liberals always seem to be enthusiastically defending liars. Lying is their most cherished human activity." -- Thought this was Hitler, but it was coulter.
posted by delmoi at 6:43 PM on June 22, 2006


You know who Ann Coulter is? She's the Lindsey Lohan of the 34-55 white male demographic. She's prepackaged pop politics. Ann Coulter and Fox News are reality TV for stupid people who want to seem smart. She doesn't present arguments or ideas, she delivers riffs and punch lines.

I mean, look, she named her book "Godless". What in the name of the twin orbiting Jesuses does that even mean? Liberals are bad because they are atheists or something? Even the founding fathers didn't believe in Jesus Christ. Are they godless? Osama believes very strongly in God. Is he okay? If I believe in Xenu, am I ok in Ann's book? Which god are we talking about? Who the hell buys this book, and are they on an FBI watchlist somewhere?

Seriously, think about this. Somebody bought Ann Coulter's book. They bought it in *hardback* because they couldn't wait for the paperback. This person honestly doesn't know what will be in that book, and they can't wait to find out. They were not too embarrassed to bring it to the register. They took them back to their home. It's at a prized spot on their bookshelf.

Ann Coulter has special meaning for them: Oh, look, she's on TV. Ann Coulter. She's on Yahoo. Ann Coulter. She's in USA today. Ann Coulter. Next to the funny piechart. Ann Coulter. A new book. Ann Coulter. Red States. Ann Coulter. Sean Hannity. Ann Coulter. The Bible. Ann Coulter. I'm scared. Ann Coulter. I am comforted. Ann Coulter. I am complete. Ann Coulter. Ann coulter.
an..n...c....o.....u......l.......t........e.........r

This person lives in your neighborhood. This may be someone you know, maybe even someone you love. If so, plese let them know it's not too late to get help.
posted by Pastabagel at 6:45 PM on June 22, 2006 [3 favorites]


hitler was more eloquent

1. Take into account the comparative literacy of their audiences.
2. Hitler didn't write *anything* you read there. Or rather, you have to realize that you're reading what the *translator* wrote.
posted by Slothrup at 6:57 PM on June 22, 2006


true. on that note i wo uld like to add that ann and adolf both have great PR. ...God, i think i need a drink now.
posted by Doorstop at 7:02 PM on June 22, 2006


The thing that gets me is, has Ann Coulter ever even been to church? Does she know what the inside of one looks like?
posted by fungible at 7:02 PM on June 22, 2006


This reminds me of an exercise one of my writing professors did. She gave everyone a paragraph from MLK's "Letter Written in a Birmingham Jail." Lots of good stuff in it about not obeying unjust laws if I remember correctly. The trick was, some of them were signed Martin Luther King Jr., some were signed Adolf Hitler, some were signed with Ghandi's name, and some had Charles Manson's name on them. She then asked the class what are reactions were. I had one of the Charles Manson-signed ones, and said something along the lines of "The sentiments seem noble and make sense, but the author was a drug-addicted, insane, murderer."

I got some weird looks from the Ghandi / MLK crowd.

Maybe that is an old teacher's trick, but it was a good exercise on what your expectations were, knowing who the author was.

Not sure what my whole point is, except that this thread made me think of that exercise, and yes, Ann Coulter is an evil bitch.
posted by marxchivist at 7:03 PM on June 22, 2006 [1 favorite]


if ann coulter went to church i have the strongest feeling there would:

a) be the distinct smell of burning flesh
b) be a flash fire immediately where ann was standing
posted by Doorstop at 7:05 PM on June 22, 2006


I saw the word "liberal" in most of the questions and just assumed it would be Ann Coulter for those

I wonder if the author of the quiz didn't massage the quotes slightly, putting in "liberal" where Hitler said "jew," for instance. Anyone know?

Nope, but I thought the same thing & assumed that most of the quotes were Coulter's, specifically because of all this liberal-this & liberal-that. I'm no Hitler expert, but I am sure he railed against far different demons than liberals.

Aside from that, as far as I know, the USA is the only country that even uses this terminology for its more progressive, left-of-centre people (although Canada may also recognise these "liberal" creatures). In Australia, for example, the Liberals are the conservatives, so "liberals" end up being called things like "latte-sipping chardonnay socialists".
posted by UbuRoivas at 7:06 PM on June 22, 2006


Marxchivist: what a funny exercise. On a related note, you might find this amusing: I remember reading that a bunch of Americans surveyed thought that the founding fathers had included this phrase in the Constitution: "From each, according to his ability; to each, according to his need"
posted by UbuRoivas at 7:12 PM on June 22, 2006


The man painted pictures of dogs, for goodness sake.

And then he gave them cyanide.
posted by ryokoblue at 7:18 PM on June 22, 2006


I got 11, not half bad considering I haven't read a damn thing either of them have written.
posted by Alexandros at 7:25 PM on June 22, 2006


Pastabagel : You know who Ann Coulter is? She's the Lindsey Lohan of the 34-55 white male demographic.

i'm going to take minor issue with this. Before she became a freak, Lohan was actually quite a good actress. i really don't think Coulter compares. i can't think of any examples of a time when she has done anything to indicate she has talent.

Other than at being shrill, she good at that in spades.

/Derail. Sorry.
posted by quin at 7:27 PM on June 22, 2006


The funny thing is that this thread illustrates quite clearly why Ann Coulter is so successful.
posted by Pacheco at 7:27 PM on June 22, 2006


Huh, I only got six right. I thought it was a trick quiz, and they were all Coulter. Nope! So easy to get them confused.
posted by blacklite at 7:33 PM on June 22, 2006


This person lives in your neighborhood.

And they shop at the huge chain-bookstore I work in. And they buy ten copies of this book a day. Sometimes they buy a few at once, you know, for their friends, so they can all have something to masturbate to together.
posted by dopamine at 7:36 PM on June 22, 2006


"I want you to wreck this."
posted by ColdChef at 7:37 PM on June 22, 2006


Some of you guys seem to be missing this comment. The quiz changed Hitler's language to make it less distinguishable from Coulter's.
posted by ludwig_van at 7:43 PM on June 22, 2006


13 out of 14 right. Coulter is nothing like Hitler.
posted by Slithy_Tove at 7:59 PM on June 22, 2006


i think attention should be paid to coulter's usage of liberal as a noun
posted by mulligan at 8:03 PM on June 22, 2006


I got thirteen right.
posted by jayder at 8:42 PM on June 22, 2006


It's a trick answer. Coulter IS Hitler.
('Cause they saved Hitler's brain)
posted by Smedleyman at 9:18 PM on June 22, 2006


i got all 14 right

how did i do that? ... simple ... ann coulter can write a somewhat decent sentence ... adolf couldn't write worth a damn ... (yes, i know he's translated, but obviously, i can still tell the difference) ... they sound different ...
posted by pyramid termite at 10:13 PM on June 22, 2006


Before she became a freak, Lohan was actually quite a good actress

Have you seen the Prairie Home Companion movie? She's a good actress even since becoming a freak.
posted by moss at 10:16 PM on June 22, 2006


Let me guess: they're all from Coulter?
posted by NewBornHippy at 10:18 PM on June 22, 2006


Coulter is the Whore of Babylon.
posted by Goofyy at 10:42 PM on June 22, 2006


Didn't we agree to ignore her?
posted by ackeber at 11:43 PM on June 22, 2006


At least Hitler looked like a cat... He had that going for him.
posted by missbossy at 11:51 PM on June 22, 2006


Fourteen out of fifteen correcto.
posted by stenseng at 12:13 AM on June 23, 2006


She wanted me to wreck it.
posted by stenseng at 12:14 AM on June 23, 2006


It speaks volumes about Coulter that we're framing Hitler as a paragon of eloquence above her, to say nothing of moral turpitude.

Also, doesn't it seem weird that Hitler uses so many French words?
posted by Clamwacker at 12:16 AM on June 23, 2006


stenseng: Tell me what you think of Chomsky!!
posted by Clamwacker at 12:17 AM on June 23, 2006


I think he's a brilliant and groundbreaking thinker in the field of cognitive linguistics. His Syntactic Structures is a masterpiece, and virtual required reading for the discipline. I absolutely agree with is criticisms of postmodernist and poststructuralist theory.

What one might describe as his apologism for the Khmer Rouge strikes me as a definite sore point, but I generally agree with many of his political observations.


Anything else you'd like to know, Clamwacker?
posted by stenseng at 12:37 AM on June 23, 2006


13 out of 14 right. Coulter is nothing like Hitler.

If this were a facial-hair waxing contest you might have a point. Unfortunately for you it isn't and you don't.
posted by trondant at 5:22 AM on June 23, 2006


...with a laser cannon.

pewpewpew


...with my yellow laser beam.

Come on up and I'll adore you
with my yellow laser beam...
posted by loquacious at 6:02 AM on June 23, 2006


Ann Coulter has special meaning for them: Oh, look, she's on TV. Ann Coulter. She's on Yahoo. Ann Coulter. She's in USA today. Ann Coulter. Next to the funny piechart. Ann Coulter. A new book. Ann Coulter. Red States. Ann Coulter. Sean Hannity. Ann Coulter. The Bible. Ann Coulter. I'm scared. Ann Coulter. I am comforted. Ann Coulter. I am complete. Ann Coulter. Ann coulter.
an..n...c....o.....u......l.......t........e.........r


Bravo! You've captured the thought flow of the obsessed DailyKos denizen perfectly.
posted by Krrrlson at 6:32 AM on June 23, 2006


Pastabagel writes "You know who Ann Coulter is? She's the Lindsey Lohan of the 34-55 white male demographic. She's prepackaged pop politics."

Nah. It's not nearly as sophisticated as that. She's just a hateful bitch who figured that the time had come for her ilk when Clinton was almost impeached because of a blowjob.
posted by clevershark at 8:14 AM on June 23, 2006


What one might describe as his apologism for the Khmer Rouge strikes me as a definite sore point, but I generally agree with many of his political observations.

It might be described that way, but only by someone who is not paying attention. He simply notes that we ought to pay more attention to atrocities for which we are directly responsible, rather than those that are committed by our enemies. Thus, the massacre of the East Timorese, which we sanctioned, ought to have received more press than the Khmer. Instead, the opposite occurred, and the US had hardly any evidence that our allies were engaged in genocide. (There's a great graphic in the documentary Manufacturing Consent where they compare the column inches devoted to each in the NYTimes by rolling them out in a stadium of some sort. I think the ratio was something like 78" to 1100".)

But this is a heavy derail. I got 13 out of 14 on the first try, and I only missed the one Hitler quote about American liberals because of the vocab-switch. It's a silly quiz that can't prove its own point.
posted by anotherpanacea at 8:31 AM on June 23, 2006


Bravo! You've captured the thought flow of the obsessed DailyKos denizen LittleGreenSnotballs suckers perfectly.
posted by Krrrlson


There. Fixed it for you.
posted by nofundy at 10:53 AM on June 23, 2006


i would like a buddhist monk to immolate her.
posted by aiq at 12:52 PM on June 23, 2006


14 right.
I never realized their similarities. Something tells me that if she were in power....
posted by Rashomon at 4:34 PM on June 23, 2006


Come on up and I'll adore you
with my yellow laser beam...


OK, well, some people obviously spend more time on the internets than I do. That's a relief.

However, that song is not.

well, in some sense it's about relief
posted by spiderwire at 8:41 PM on June 23, 2006


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