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A Tail By Any Other Name
June 27, 2006 8:49 PM   Subscribe

A Tail By Any Other Name : Scott Adams, creator of Dilbert thinks it would be awfully handy to have an extra appendage. A Providence handyman sees things a little differently.
posted by grapefruitmoon (22 comments total)

 
What a maroon for getting the damn thing in the first place...
posted by brundlefly at 8:52 PM on June 27, 2006


He just couldn't wait those 2 years, could he?
posted by puke & cry at 9:00 PM on June 27, 2006 [1 favorite]


A tail 'Taint that appendage. Get it? There's a taint in between those areas! Oh man, lemmie write that down!
posted by Balisong at 9:04 PM on June 27, 2006 [1 favorite]


How much did Scott Adams pay you to propagate the notion that Scott Adams is in any way relevant since over five years ago?

Now I need a post showcasing the social insights of Jay Leno.
posted by squirrel at 9:18 PM on June 27, 2006


squirrel: I would say that he didn't pay me enough.

Perhaps I'm just easily amused, but I think the idea of using a perma-erection as a hammer is at least giggle-worthy, even if the idea came from a source prone to fits of lameness.

(Full disclosure: I found this randomly. I don't even read Dilbert and honestly don't know why half the cartoons are supposed to be funny. It's about cubicles, right?)
posted by grapefruitmoon at 9:28 PM on June 27, 2006


Perhaps I'm just easily amused, but I think the idea of using a perma-erection as a hammer is at least giggle-worthy, even if the idea came from a source prone to fits of lameness.

If so, you should see the movie Real Genius, the movie that comment is almost certainly referencing.
posted by b1tr0t at 9:59 PM on June 27, 2006


Dilbert was never quite as lame as that blog post, was it?
posted by unmake at 10:05 PM on June 27, 2006


Even if my willie shrunk to the size of a raisin, even if my member inverted and pointed toward my liver, even if my johnson were limper than overcooked linguine, even if my pistol were shooting nothing but nerf pellets, even if my cucumber were withered and dried and seedless, even if my wife cried when she saw me naked, even if my manhood were easily confused with an unrolled and empty condom, even if the fate of all humanity somehow hinged on my getting a boner, I would NOT, REPEAT NOT, NOT EVER, even utter the words "steel and plastic implant," let alone allow such a device within 100 yards of my crotch.
posted by brain_drain at 10:15 PM on June 27, 2006


Yes, I just uttered those words. Shut up.
posted by brain_drain at 10:17 PM on June 27, 2006


brain_drain, does typing count as uttering? I thought uttering involved using your voice ;-)
posted by gregb1007 at 10:47 PM on June 27, 2006


Tailing a monkey man in search of healing powers
posted by homunculus at 11:18 PM on June 27, 2006


Squirrel: It must be very stressful, following all the trendy fashions in order to become such a sphincter of sophistication.

brain_drain: betcha you'd change your mind if the alternative was no-joy.

Otherwise: Couldn't this dude just have tried wearing some tight briefs under baggy pants?
posted by Goofyy at 11:33 PM on June 27, 2006


RE: His nickname, Charles "Chick" Lennon.

Ten years and no one went for the pun?
posted by sourwookie at 12:06 AM on June 28, 2006


A tail is useless without an eye at the end.
posted by UbuRoivas at 12:09 AM on June 28, 2006


This guy must have heard every possible variation of the "...or are you just happy to see me" joke possible.

...good for him.
posted by Serial Killer Slumber Party at 4:12 AM on June 28, 2006


I would NOT, REPEAT NOT, NOT EVER, even utter the words "steel and plastic implant," let alone allow such a device within 100 yards of my crotch.

Especially when you could just buy a Humvee.
posted by R. Mutt at 5:16 AM on June 28, 2006


Damnit, and here I thought this was going to be about how to get yourself a prehensile tail. Stupid men and their stupid omnipresent penises.
posted by Dormant Gorilla at 6:22 AM on June 28, 2006


"RE: His nickname, Charles "Chick" Lennon.

Ten years and no one went for the pun?"


What's Yoko got to do with this?
posted by mr_crash_davis at 6:44 AM on June 28, 2006


It doesn't take a "sphincter of sophistication" to see that Adams jumped the shark almost a decade ago, Goof, but I appreciate your proboscis of concern. :^D
posted by squirrel at 7:50 AM on June 28, 2006


MetaFilter: your proboscis of concern
posted by Richard Daly at 7:54 AM on June 28, 2006


Know who else wants a tail? Christopher Walken. It's true.
posted by MrZero at 11:57 AM on June 28, 2006


I have to hold my nose whenever I read anything Adams writes, if only because of his Intelligent Design posts.

Also, upon reading the comments in that thread, it seems he agrees with this guy about gravity.
posted by brundlefly at 12:18 PM on June 28, 2006


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