Smash the Plate

August 9, 2006 10:09 AM

NWTF | 2 DAGOS | JOHN316 | C9H13N | RDRAGE | XONSUX | UDINK | SHTHPNS | GOTMILF | HMFIC | TRY4FUN | LTRS
posted by Otis (99 comments total)

RETRDD. WTF? STFU, GTFO, MYOB. PITA!
posted by rzklkng at 10:12 AM on August 9, 2006

KYAG.
posted by jonmc at 10:14 AM on August 9, 2006

GOTMEFI
posted by fleetmouse at 10:14 AM on August 9, 2006

Cool post.
posted by erebora at 10:15 AM on August 9, 2006

well done.
posted by shoepal at 10:16 AM on August 9, 2006

sorry, WELL DONE
posted by shoepal at 10:16 AM on August 9, 2006

I wish I could write for the local news:

"MILF is an attractive mother," he said...But in the nearly two years he had the plate on his car at least two mothers didn't find it attractive.

posted by smackfu at 10:17 AM on August 9, 2006

Hey the NWTF person should get NIPLE instead.
posted by thirteenkiller at 10:17 AM on August 9, 2006

People's license plates should be their cell phone numbers. It would really help to cut down on all the obscene gestures if people could just talk to one another.
posted by flarbuse at 10:19 AM on August 9, 2006 [2 favorites]

A55ORGY
posted by yhbc at 10:20 AM on August 9, 2006

Clever post.

And lest we forget... A55 RGY
posted by justkevin at 10:23 AM on August 9, 2006

I suppose I'm out of touch, but could someone tell me what's so offensive about DCJ5 and DA42?
posted by QuietDesperation at 10:23 AM on August 9, 2006

Well I should have seen that coming.
posted by justkevin at 10:24 AM on August 9, 2006

DMVSUX
posted by clevershark at 10:25 AM on August 9, 2006

ASSMAN
posted by mr.marx at 10:27 AM on August 9, 2006

GOATSE
posted by revgeorge at 10:29 AM on August 9, 2006 [1 favorite]

Attn Howard Stern fans in the Bayou State: "FJACKIE" is avail. in LA.

Why would any Italian think "dago" isn't offensive?

If PA issued plates for front bumpers, TI 3VOM would be my first choice.
posted by wfc123 at 10:31 AM on August 9, 2006

You know, I don't think I'd want to drive around with GOATSE plates...
posted by clevershark at 10:31 AM on August 9, 2006

HRF DRF
posted by fandango_matt at 10:32 AM on August 9, 2006

The words "obscene" and "decent" and their derivatives should be stricken from the English language because they are impossible to define beyond "I know it when I see it". But moreso, we in the US are a bunch of busybody bluenoses. When we're not surfing the 'net for porn, that is.
posted by oncogenesis at 10:33 AM on August 9, 2006

At first I thought it was a flight plan, I'm such a dork.
posted by drleary at 10:33 AM on August 9, 2006

Really good collection of links - Customized liscence plates are always fun.
posted by chudmonkey at 10:33 AM on August 9, 2006

"Apparently, the young people use it on the computer," she said.
posted by ND¢ at 10:36 AM on August 9, 2006

I definitely saw someone with CMLTOE on their license plate a few weeks ago. If only I had my camera with me...
posted by geeky at 10:37 AM on August 9, 2006

The best plate I ever saw was: DRUGDLR
No, I'm not joking. In fact, it blew past me as I was speeding 15+ mph on I-80. Fantastic!
posted by prostyle at 10:40 AM on August 9, 2006

GR8 FPP KTHX
posted by ninjew at 10:41 AM on August 9, 2006

NWTF?
posted by Flashman at 10:46 AM on August 9, 2006

IB6UB9
posted by ruthsarian at 10:47 AM on August 9, 2006

SILF
/not a plate (on a plate, maybe)
posted by TheDonF at 10:48 AM on August 9, 2006

I've seen the local MILF a few times near my partner's old home. It's on a big ol' 'murican car with an old couple driving in it. I'm betting it's some combination of their initals or names, but it sure as heck makes me giggle every time I see it.
posted by cobaltnine at 10:50 AM on August 9, 2006

A British friend of my dad's resident in the US used to tool around in Bollox. But that was a long time ago before we had the interweb to make people aware of how people in differerent cultures use rude words.
posted by rhymer at 10:51 AM on August 9, 2006

"Niple went to a BMV office to get some answers. A clerk had to whisper what the acronym NWTF means to some people.

"Now what the –- and the last word begins with an f," Niple said. "I said, 'You got to be kidding me."

well, she should just use her name, perhaps...
posted by HuronBob at 10:54 AM on August 9, 2006

About a year ago, I saw a vanity plate with a jumble of I's and 1's and o's that was arranged in such a way that I couldn't seem to spell it correctly after glancing at it a few times.

I imagine this is handy for getting out of tickets on the high liklihood that the plate number is incorrect on the ticket.
posted by dr_dank at 10:58 AM on August 9, 2006

I saw a "GOP BAD" a while back...

But my favorite is still "SOULJAH"
posted by inigo2 at 11:01 AM on August 9, 2006

My current license plate: KWYJIBO

...that's hardcore fandom.
posted by thanotopsis at 11:02 AM on August 9, 2006 [1 favorite]

ARYAN-1 is OK in MISSOURI
posted by yeti at 11:02 AM on August 9, 2006

My favorite personalized license plate was back in Phoenix in the '80s. The plate said "Ahura" and was attached to a Mazda RX7.
posted by djeo at 11:03 AM on August 9, 2006

IDGI
posted by ZachsMind at 11:03 AM on August 9, 2006

ITMFA
posted by Shike at 11:04 AM on August 9, 2006

Last year, a friend of mine picked up an old beater Honda to commute to work in, and was trying to come up with a vanity plate for the hell of it. I'd seen the Florida "A55(orange)RGY" plate, and suggested that he try to sneak "A550R6Y" past the Kansas DMV.

He did.

Even better, there was an article a few months later in the Wichita Eagle (Google Cache) detailing the extra measures the Kansas DMV was going through to keep offensive phrases off vanity plates.

The plate's since been voluntarily retired (sold the car) since then.
posted by phong3d at 11:07 AM on August 9, 2006

To Dr_Dank's point, I see quite a few limos in NYC that have combinations of 3883883 as their plate number. No doubt for the same reason.
posted by Sk4n at 11:07 AM on August 9, 2006

More from Mr. UDINK.
posted by mr_crash_davis at 11:07 AM on August 9, 2006

3M TA3

-- for the front license plate.
posted by bumpkin at 11:09 AM on August 9, 2006

The personalized plate DIKSUCK is available.
Request this personalized plate!

Anything goes in Louisiana.
posted by The Jesse Helms at 11:10 AM on August 9, 2006

"The personalized plate UMELXIX is available."
(although I like it better as U ME LXIX)

just LXIX is available, too
posted by bashos_frog at 11:16 AM on August 9, 2006

Sk4n:I see quite a few limos in NYC that have combinations of 3883883 as their plate number

I think those are a different story. Certain plates in NY like Livery, Dealer, and Transporter plates usually are mostly numbers. In my example, this was a private vehicle with a vanity plate that chose those letters and numbers in that particular order.

I wonder if they let the plate exist, seeing how it would fall into the "misleading" clause of most DMV vanity plate regulations.
posted by dr_dank at 11:17 AM on August 9, 2006

TMI
posted by ZachsMind at 11:20 AM on August 9, 2006

I've always gotten a kick out of how personalized license plates reflect which languages are mainstream. Here in Texas the license plate BREAD8 is forbidden (I do not speak Spanish, but apparently if say it in Spanish it sounds similar to a word for the female genitals) as are any license plates which spell obscenities in Spanish. However I poked around and discovered that no one seems to have a problem with HENTAI or EICHI, OPPAI, OMANKO, CHIKAN, etc. And I'm sure ZAKENNAYO would be ok except its too long.

Of course, I suppose there isn't much point in getting an insulting and/or vulgar license plate if most people can't understand it, so unless a lot of Americans start learning Japanese all of the above will probably be just fine.
posted by sotonohito at 11:22 AM on August 9, 2006

"3M TA3

-- for the front license plate."

Or the hood:


posted by mr_crash_davis at 11:22 AM on August 9, 2006

My old landlord and good friend was a crazy, alcoholic middle-aged gay man who owned two Jaguars, a newish convertible and an ancient sedan. He applied for a plate that said "fag jag" but was inexplicably turned down. Alas.
posted by cilantro at 11:24 AM on August 9, 2006

"I poked around and discovered that no one seems to have a problem with HENTAI or EICHI, OPPAI, OMANKO, CHIKAN, etc."



"SUCCESS! The character combination you selected is available at this time"
posted by mr_crash_davis at 11:27 AM on August 9, 2006

mr_crash_davis: You are now officially my hero. Of course, given the relative popularity of that term I doubt it'd last long.
posted by sotonohito at 11:31 AM on August 9, 2006

A friend has had KILL ME as his license plate for years.
posted by shoepal at 11:31 AM on August 9, 2006

Maybe it'll stick aroundd longer if you spell it BOOKOK E
posted by dr_dank at 11:33 AM on August 9, 2006

Not offensive, but I always liked this use of vanity plates that I first saw a-many years ago.
posted by Hal Mumkin at 11:34 AM on August 9, 2006 [1 favorite]

The lawsuit follows another legal battle over a license plate waged by a Wallingford woman two years ago when she wanted her vanity plate to read "Irish."

The woman's request was rejected because the department considered the word ethnically offensive.

That was some wonderfully confused thinking.
posted by tula at 11:38 AM on August 9, 2006

”With a series of letters and numbers, if you're not a chemist it doesn't ring a bell.”

In that case: H2SO4.
posted by Termite at 11:43 AM on August 9, 2006

I wonder what they'd do if confronted with my real life last name, which means schlong in some central european language or another?

Not that I like to brag.
posted by Kid Charlemagne at 11:50 AM on August 9, 2006

posted by baphomet at 11:50 AM on August 9, 2006

In that case: H2SO4.

Heh, heh. Why, everybody knows that's the recipe for good old common table salt!
posted by Turtles all the way down at 11:51 AM on August 9, 2006

The best plate I ever saw was: DRUGDLR
No, I'm not joking. In fact, it blew past me as I was speeding 15+ mph on I-80. Fantastic!

Was that anywhere near Nebraska? I know a guy in Lincoln who is a pharmacist and has those plates on a Porsche.
posted by dead_ at 11:58 AM on August 9, 2006

I saw this around Silicon Valley somewhere:
PHO KING
posted by pantsrobot at 12:03 PM on August 9, 2006

Snakes Letters on a Plane Plate
posted by ninjew at 12:04 PM on August 9, 2006

There's a car I often see in the lot here that has the plate "DP FAN."

Took me forever to figure out that probably meant "Detroit Pistons." Probably.
posted by PinkStainlessTail at 12:13 PM on August 9, 2006

FEL8EO is available.
posted by wumpus at 12:24 PM on August 9, 2006

TAN 90 would be appropriate for a certain make of car.
posted by pax digita at 12:50 PM on August 9, 2006

Driving to DC a few years ago I saw

MRBATE

which was fine except the driver had added a bumper sticker above the plate that said:

"Do you" with an arrow down to the plate.

I thought it was a lot of trouble for a little pay off.

Then I realized that fit too.
posted by ?! at 12:51 PM on August 9, 2006

Mine says TRPLBIM. The car is an older 3-series bimmer.
posted by hellphish at 12:59 PM on August 9, 2006

i saw this once here in raleigh...and it's available again.


posted by hebruiser at 1:11 PM on August 9, 2006

My favorite personalized license plate was back in Phoenix in the '80s. The plate said "Ahura" and was attached to a Mazda RX7.
That's hilarious. Also kind of funny that it's in Phoenix. You know, fire and all that...

Great post, Otis. Thanks.
posted by jiawen at 1:23 PM on August 9, 2006

In what seems to be a highly visible instance of the Law of Unintended Consequences, there's a Prius in the work lot next to ours with the plates

G♥TWATS

posted by scrump at 1:29 PM on August 9, 2006

Both Utah and Louisiana consider YOU POO to be acceptable.
posted by nickmark at 2:00 PM on August 9, 2006

Good post. (Deplorable prudery.)
posted by languagehat at 2:05 PM on August 9, 2006

Someone here in North Kakalaki has CHMOD777. I got a kick outta that one.
posted by BeerFilter at 2:31 PM on August 9, 2006

I'd also seen /DEV/CAR and /DEV/TRK in the RTP area.
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 2:51 PM on August 9, 2006

Who are these people who go to court over a vanity plate? Do they have that much money/time?!
posted by zorro astor at 2:54 PM on August 9, 2006

I forgot to add this earlier, I once saw a Honda Odyssey that had a license plate that said, "HAL"
posted by drleary at 2:55 PM on August 9, 2006

This is ridiculous. You could turn ANY plate into something offensive, if try hard enough. In fact, that's actually a fun game to play on a long trip. =]
posted by TechnoLustLuddite at 3:03 PM on August 9, 2006

One I've wanted to do, here in CA, is I [heart] [hand] JOBS.

Imagine my disappointment when I learned you only get one symbol per plate.
posted by lekvar at 3:18 PM on August 9, 2006

Heh, heh. Why, everybody knows that's the recipe for good old common table salt!

SO not going to your place for dinner.
posted by Sparx at 3:24 PM on August 9, 2006

I saw this around Silicon Valley somewhere:
PHO KING

Perhaps you're thinking of the restaurant in downtown San Jose, "Pho Kyu"?

I haven't been there in many many years, so I don't know if it's still there, but I laughed every time I saw it.

Great food, too.
posted by Malor at 3:35 PM on August 9, 2006

OCEAIT. Saw it in California years ago.
posted by rleamon at 3:44 PM on August 9, 2006

I've seenseveral regular Texas plates starting with 'XXX' in the Dallas area. The best was XXX 36D. It was on an SUV. A woman was driving. I wonder if she cared?
posted by hockeyman at 4:13 PM on August 9, 2006

"The personalized plate H8R is available."
posted by nj_subgenius at 4:14 PM on August 9, 2006

My (extremely geeky) uncle in Maryland had a Honda Accord with the plates 4X4X8. Which, he had to explain to me, were the measurements for a cord of wood. "A cord! Get it?"
posted by Kraftmatic Adjustable Cheese at 4:14 PM on August 9, 2006

My sister had a custom plate that said DZNUTS, which was much loved by everyone she passed.
posted by sluggo at 6:26 PM on August 9, 2006

I saw an Ohio plate that read "GTFOOMW" a few years ago. What surprised me the most was that I knew instantly what it meant.
posted by tizzie at 6:49 PM on August 9, 2006

In the UK, back in the early 90's, before you were able to request a particular combination of letters & numbers on your plate (you can still only choose some of the characters, the others being fixed I think), the only way to get a "cherished plate" was to find one that had been issued by chance. Bear in mind the UK has used half a dozen or more different formats for license plates over the years, one of the longest lived being "three letters-one to three numbers-letter".

Bearing this in mind, I saw a plate on a BMW 735i driven by a portly gentleman given to wearing track suits, gold chains and a perm.

The plate read "FAT 61T".

I LOL'd.
posted by kcds at 7:37 PM on August 9, 2006

My favorite, a Florida plate, was

2X3 IS 6

I don't suppose there's any guess what she does for a living? (Yes, it was on a "Love Teachers" apple plate.)

This seems like either an excellent, or a horrible, time to point out Jef Poskanzer's ACME License Plate Maker.
posted by baylink at 7:42 PM on August 9, 2006

"She said, ‘How do I explain to my kids when they see this word?’" he recalled.

When did it get the be the government's job to prevent parents from having to do theirs?
posted by baylink at 7:45 PM on August 9, 2006 [1 favorite]

My personal favourite is SHTLCK, which appeared in a 48Hour film in Auckland this year about a man's struggle to become New Zealand's first Tongan badminton champion. Think about it.
posted by Soulfather at 8:44 PM on August 9, 2006

A woman in my community, I assume a cosmetician or something, has the plate FACIAL. Cracks me up every time I see it.
posted by alltomorrowsparties at 1:19 AM on August 10, 2006

A woman who lived near me had a minivan with the plate SUNYBCH. I thought that was an odd choice until I remembered that we were close to the beach.
posted by Joh at 1:41 AM on August 10, 2006

The most off-color license plate I've seen on the road was IMEZRU2.
posted by Faint of Butt at 3:50 AM on August 10, 2006

ICMEINU
posted by shoepal at 2:36 PM on August 10, 2006

I saw one today on a SUV with oversized tires, and I thought of this thread:

LILMULE

...I had to check to make sure Joan Wilder ("THE Yoan Wilder??") wasn't in the passenger seat.
posted by thanotopsis at 5:36 AM on August 11, 2006

I am not making this up, my exgf got - on a brand new car - SWT 69N
posted by Brainy at 5:57 PM on August 12, 2006

WEEN ME
posted by ism at 2:07 PM on August 16, 2006

NWTF is back.
posted by Otis at 7:28 AM on August 24, 2006