maintaining a health 24/7 computer

September 7, 2006 1:13 AM

I work as a cashier for my employer. My personal interests involve computers, software, etc. I have worked for them for 3 years. They are all quite 'dummies' when is comes to maintaining a healthy computer. One of their office/administrative computers crashed a few weeks ago. The very first thing I did was open the case, and blow some of the monster-dust-bunnies out. Got a can of compressed air and finished up the rest - voila! Just like new - almost! I had asked how often the PCs are shutdown, they said never??? In 3 years?! no way!?!? I explained the horrors what could occur by letting them run 24/7/365. My supervisor has asked if I would run some maintenance on the office computers. Total of about 8-12 desktop HP/Compaq PCs operating on XP Home and XP Pro on some. In preparation for my upcoing task, I'm looking for apps to install on my USB stick (512MB), I've already downloaded and installed the following portable apps to my stick: 1. "SIW - System Information for Windows." http://www.gtopala.com/ 2. "ClamWin Portable" http://portableapps.com/apps/utilities/clamwin_portable Clamwin may be un-necessary, as they don't have internet access on these PCs. 3. "Firefox Portable" http://portableapps.com/apps/internet/firefox_portable If I am granted administrative access, I plan to install: 4. "CCleaner v1.32.345" http://www.ccleaner.com/download/ 5. "Spybot - Search & Destroy 1.4" http://www.safer-networking.org/en/download/index.html What other apps or portable-apps should I run?
posted by jamjammo (141 comments total)

Where is my graphic of the hopping bunny with the pancake on it's head?
posted by dglynn at 1:21 AM on September 7, 2006

Bravo!
posted by lemonfridge at 1:22 AM on September 7, 2006

WTF?
posted by davehat at 1:22 AM on September 7, 2006

jamjammo;

You may want to try asking this question in the Ask Metafilter section. Ask Metafilter is set up precisely for this type of post; a request for help phrased as a question accompanied by a bit of background information. The main metafilter section (which is where we are right now) is for posts that contain links to information, opinion, videos, art, jokes, games, and so forth; things you think are interesting and want to pass along to other people. This is why, any minute now, someone is going to delete this post.
posted by Clay201 at 1:22 AM on September 7, 2006

oh and...


posted by lemonfridge at 1:23 AM on September 7, 2006

You sound like the best cashier for the job. "Administrative access" granted, by all means.
posted by wtfchuck at 1:24 AM on September 7, 2006 [2 favorites has favorites]

lemonfridge;

I can't decide whether that's cute or disgusting.
posted by Clay201 at 1:25 AM on September 7, 2006

*cringe*
posted by medium format at 1:27 AM on September 7, 2006

This post is so bad, it's good.
posted by Heywood Mogroot at 1:29 AM on September 7, 2006

I was here.
posted by sveskemus at 1:31 AM on September 7, 2006

See kids, this is what drugs will do to your post.
posted by scheptech at 1:31 AM on September 7, 2006

What, I say what, TF? This will end badly. I hope. Bring forth more GIFs
posted by TheDonF at 1:32 AM on September 7, 2006

Ride that luck dragon, son! Regards, Pari
posted by maryh at 1:33 AM on September 7, 2006

And self-favorited, no less. Awesome.
posted by tula at 1:34 AM on September 7, 2006

I had asked how often the PCs are shutdown, they said never??? In 3 years?! no way!?!? I explained the horrors what could occur by letting them run 24/7/365.

You mean, none?

Why are "Computer support" people universally such idiots? Is it because if they knew anything they'd be doing something else? Yes I think it is. The problem is that they seem to think That they are experts, since they deal with people who don't know anything about computers. It's a very irritating mix.
posted by delmoi at 1:37 AM on September 7, 2006

I hereby plant this flag into what I consider the second most ridiculous post I've ever seen.

Huzzah!
posted by Jezztek at 1:39 AM on September 7, 2006

you asked for it.

posted by RobertFrost at 1:40 AM on September 7, 2006

posted by geekyguy at 1:40 AM on September 7, 2006

ok. you got me. the bunny is much better.
posted by RobertFrost at 1:41 AM on September 7, 2006

Thanks.
posted by geekyguy at 1:44 AM on September 7, 2006

MeTa.
posted by Effigy2000 at 1:46 AM on September 7, 2006

Snark. Snark. Snark. Snark. Why not just accept the obvious, namely that the poster accidentally confused the blue with the green, flag the post and move on? Unless snarking has become some kind of art form while I was sleeping.
posted by Herr Fahrstuhl at 1:47 AM on September 7, 2006

The name of the computer? I couldn't tell, but it was some kind of mushroom.
posted by GooseOnTheLoose at 1:47 AM on September 7, 2006

posted by maryh at 1:47 AM on September 7, 2006 [1 favorite has favorites]

posted by symphonik at 1:48 AM on September 7, 2006

[implied sarcasm] [picture of elephant pissing] [calls out cortex] [blames dios]
posted by Jofus at 1:54 AM on September 7, 2006

See, that's why you want to post these after midnight, when Jessamyn's gone to bed already.
posted by Dunwitty at 1:55 AM on September 7, 2006

posted by Effigy2000 at 1:56 AM on September 7, 2006

Uh-oh.
Yeah, jamjammo, understand that the bizarre reaction to your question here is because it belongs over at Ask Metafilter, as Clay201 said.
Anyway, it's been a while since I saw the balloon-humping bunny, so thanks, geekyguy.
On preview, I dig what you're saying, Herr Fahrstuhl. But snarking does seem to be something of an artform here, so....
posted by zoinks at 1:58 AM on September 7, 2006

OK, there must be something else going on here, he snarked. The title is "maintaining a health 24/7 computer". This is a viral for the new Borat movie, right?
posted by imperium at 2:03 AM on September 7, 2006

Eh.
posted by delmoi at 2:03 AM on September 7, 2006

posted by delmoi at 2:04 AM on September 7, 2006

it belongs over at Ask Metafilter

In literary criticism, stream of consciousness denotes a literary technique which seeks to describe an individual's point of view by giving the written equivalent of the character's thought processes... In stream of consciousness, the speaker's thought processes are more often depicted as overheard (or addressed to oneself) and is primarily a fictional device.
posted by scheptech at 2:07 AM on September 7, 2006

posted by soundofsuburbia at 2:07 AM on September 7, 2006

posted by MetaMonkey at 2:08 AM on September 7, 2006 [1 favorite has favorites]

This post rocks!
<img src="http://www.animation-station.com/people/images/band_playing_instruments.gif"?
posted by RobertFrost at 2:10 AM on September 7, 2006

oh no...well...it still rocks!

posted by RobertFrost at 2:10 AM on September 7, 2006

it belongs over at Ask Metafilter

Or else it gets the hose again!
posted by EarBucket at 2:11 AM on September 7, 2006

posted by iloveit at 2:12 AM on September 7, 2006

The discovery of gold in a new region typically began with a spontaneous discovery of "free gold" by a single individual. This free gold was usually placer gold in the beds of streams that descend from a nearby mountain range. Propagation of the news of the discovery typically resulted in a large influx of prospectors to join existing groups and to form new ones. The free gold supply in stream beds would become depleted somewhat quickly, and the initial phase would be followed by a longer period of prospecting in upper canyon walls for lode gold. Typically the heyday of a gold rush, when the lodes had not yet all been prospected, would last only a few years. In some cases, the depletion of gold was followed by a transition to a silver boom, and then a period of mining of other lesser value minerals. For significant gold-producing areas, the initial rush phase would be followed by a transition to modern industrial mining of ore.
posted by gramschmidt at 2:13 AM on September 7, 2006

posted by MetaMonkey at 2:14 AM on September 7, 2006 [2 favorites has favorites]

posted by pruner at 2:14 AM on September 7, 2006 [4 favorites has favorites]

Also, Jamjammo, if you repost this at AskMe, edit your question a little. Keep your main point short and direct on the front page, and leave the specifics of your story for [more inside]. Otherwise you'll seem like a bit of a text hog and some readers will pass your query by.
posted by maryh at 2:16 AM on September 7, 2006

delmoi writes "You mean, none? "

Memory leaks are real.
posted by orthogonality at 2:17 AM on September 7, 2006

posted by lemonfridge at 2:17 AM on September 7, 2006

posted by gramschmidt at 2:18 AM on September 7, 2006

Rocks indeed!
posted by geekyguy at 2:21 AM on September 7, 2006 [2 favorites has favorites]

posted by gramschmidt at 2:22 AM on September 7, 2006

*gasp*

Look at Tara Reid's liver!


posted by gramschmidt at 2:26 AM on September 7, 2006

posted by loquacious at 2:27 AM on September 7, 2006 [1 favorite has favorites]

posted by loquacious at 2:29 AM on September 7, 2006 [3 favorites has favorites]

Whose birthday is it?
posted by TwelveTwo at 2:31 AM on September 7, 2006

Thought I'd chime in.
posted by Item at 2:34 AM on September 7, 2006

posted by loquacious at 2:34 AM on September 7, 2006

Mr. Jack Lifting's.


posted by gramschmidt at 2:34 AM on September 7, 2006

See, this is why Matt & Jess should never be allowed to sleep - or at least should work oud some kind of shift-sleeping arrangement.
posted by Item at 2:36 AM on September 7, 2006

Happy Birthday, Jack Liftings!
posted by TwelveTwo at 2:38 AM on September 7, 2006

I just wanted to say -- I was there I saw it happen.
posted by feelinglistless at 2:39 AM on September 7, 2006

Q: That's insane talk! Lee Marvin doesn't ride a broom!

A:

posted by gramschmidt at 2:39 AM on September 7, 2006

This post I mean.
posted by feelinglistless at 2:40 AM on September 7, 2006

This is why we can't have nice things!
posted by [expletive deleted] at 2:41 AM on September 7, 2006

This is a nice thing!
posted by TwelveTwo at 2:42 AM on September 7, 2006

posted by loquacious at 2:44 AM on September 7, 2006 [2 favorites has favorites]

posted by MetaMonkey at 2:46 AM on September 7, 2006

MetaFilter Exclusive! Out-takes from The Two Towers:


posted by gramschmidt at 2:47 AM on September 7, 2006

posted by MetaMonkey at 2:47 AM on September 7, 2006

posted by loquacious at 2:48 AM on September 7, 2006

I just wanted to say -- I was there I saw it happen.

Ah but do work as an employee for your employer and do your personal interests involve computers, software, etc.?
posted by scheptech at 2:48 AM on September 7, 2006

posted by MetaMonkey at 2:50 AM on September 7, 2006 [1 favorite has favorites]

posted by gramschmidt at 2:51 AM on September 7, 2006

posted by Rubber Soul at 2:52 AM on September 7, 2006

posted by Item at 2:54 AM on September 7, 2006

Wow.

I knew there was a reason for tonight's insomnia.
posted by jason's_planet at 2:54 AM on September 7, 2006

Wow.

I knew there was a reason for tonight's insomnia.
posted by jason's_planet at 2:54 AM on September 7, 2006

posted by [expletive deleted] at 2:58 AM on September 7, 2006

Wait -- I've got the perfect thing!
posted by Leather McWhip at 2:58 AM on September 7, 2006

so informative and yet containing no information whatsoever .... couldnt you have given the five dollars to some homeless chappie instead
posted by sgt.serenity at 2:58 AM on September 7, 2006

posted by MetaMonkey at 2:59 AM on September 7, 2006

Everybody loves a crapflood.

Apparently.
posted by stavrosthewonderchicken at 2:59 AM on September 7, 2006

posted by Leather McWhip at 2:59 AM on September 7, 2006

PETER: Yeah, I would say the biggest common denominator is that they didn't grow up wanting to be movie directors.
They didn't grow up specializing in the cinema at an early age, as we have so many kids today.
Because the reason is simple. There was no such thing as being a movie director.
It was an unknown occupation when they were starting out.
They kind of fell into it in a number of different ways.
And that's, I think, one of the most interesting things about each of these directors.
They developed a life experience, and had experiences in life that didn't prepare
them necessarily for making movies, but certainly made their movies richer
because they knew about people and had experiences that were outside of show business.
One of the things that wrong with pictures today, I think, is that so many of the people
making them started out wanting to. And so they specialized too soon
and don't really learn much about what life is like.
posted by gramschmidt at 2:59 AM on September 7, 2006

posted by fixedgear at 3:04 AM on September 7, 2006

Well that dancing gif certainly elucidates something that's been on my mind, Leather. And that thing is, more buttons.


Listen my children and you shall hear
Of the midnight ride of Paul Revere,
On the eighteenth of April, in Seventy-five;
Hardly a man is now alive
Who remembers that famous day and year.

He said to his friend, "If the British march
By land or sea from the town to-night,
Hang a lantern aloft in the belfry arch
Of the North Church tower as a signal light,--
One if by land, and two if by sea;
And I on the opposite shore will be,
Ready to ride and spread the alarm
Through every Middlesex village and farm,
For the country folk to be up and to arm."

Then he said "Good-night!" and with muffled oar
Silently rowed to the Charlestown shore,
Just as the moon rose over the bay,
Where swinging wide at her moorings lay
The Somerset, British man-of-war;
A phantom ship, with each mast and spar
Across the moon like a prison bar,
And a huge black hulk, that was magnified
By its own reflection in the tide.

Meanwhile, his friend through alley and street
Wanders and watches, with eager ears,
Till in the silence around him he hears
The muster of men at the barrack door,
The sound of arms, and the tramp of feet,
And the measured tread of the grenadiers,
Marching down to their boats on the shore.

Then he climbed the tower of the Old North Church,
By the wooden stairs, with stealthy tread,
To the belfry chamber overhead,
And startled the pigeons from their perch
On the sombre rafters, that round him made
Masses and moving shapes of shade,--
By the trembling ladder, steep and tall,
To the highest window in the wall,
Where he paused to listen and look down
A moment on the roofs of the town
And the moonlight flowing over all.

Beneath, in the churchyard, lay the dead,
In their night encampment on the hill,
Wrapped in silence so deep and still
That he could hear, like a sentinel's tread,
The watchful night-wind, as it went
Creeping along from tent to tent,
And seeming to whisper, "All is well!"
A moment only he feels the spell
Of the place and the hour, and the secret dread
Of the lonely belfry and the dead;
For suddenly all his thoughts are bent
On a shadowy something far away,
Where the river widens to meet the bay,--
A line of black that bends and floats
On the rising tide like a bridge of boats.

Meanwhile, impatient to mount and ride,
Booted and spurred, with a heavy stride
On the opposite shore walked Paul Revere.
Now he patted his horse's side,
Now he gazed at the landscape far and near,
Then, impetuous, stamped the earth,
And turned and tightened his saddle girth;
But mostly he watched with eager search
The belfry tower of the Old North Church,
As it rose above the graves on the hill,
Lonely and spectral and sombre and still.
And lo! as he looks, on the belfry's height
A glimmer, and then a gleam of light!
He springs to the saddle, the bridle he turns,
But lingers and gazes, till full on his sight
A second lamp in the belfry burns.

A hurry of hoofs in a village street,
A shape in the moonlight, a bulk in the dark,
And beneath, from the pebbles, in passing, a spark
Struck out by a steed flying fearless and fleet;
That was all! And yet, through the gloom and the light,
The fate of a nation was riding that night;
And the spark struck out by that steed, in his flight,
Kindled the land into flame with its heat.
He has left the village and mounted the steep,
And beneath him, tranquil and broad and deep,
Is the Mystic, meeting the ocean tides;
And under the alders that skirt its edge,
Now soft on the sand, now loud on the ledge,
Is heard the tramp of his steed as he rides.

It was twelve by the village clock
When he crossed the bridge into Medford town.
He heard the crowing of the cock,
And the barking of the farmer's dog,
And felt the damp of the river fog,
That rises after the sun goes down.

It was one by the village clock,
When he galloped into Lexington.
He saw the gilded weathercock
Swim in the moonlight as he passed,
And the meeting-house windows, black and bare,
Gaze at him with a spectral glare,
As if they already stood aghast
At the bloody work they would look upon.

It was two by the village clock,
When he came to the bridge in Concord town.
He heard the bleating of the flock,
And the twitter of birds among the trees,
And felt the breath of the morning breeze
Blowing over the meadow brown.
And one was safe and asleep in his bed
Who at the bridge would be first to fall,
Who that day would be lying dead,
Pierced by a British musket ball.

You know the rest. In the books you have read
How the British Regulars fired and fled,---
How the farmers gave them ball for ball,
From behind each fence and farmyard wall,
Chasing the redcoats down the lane,
Then crossing the fields to emerge again
Under the trees at the turn of the road,
And only pausing to fire and load.

So through the night rode Paul Revere;=
And so through the night went his cry of alarm
To every Middlesex village and farm,---
A cry of defiance, and not of fear,
A voice in the darkness, a knock at the door,
And a word that shall echo for evermore!
For, borne on the night-wind of the Past,
Through all our history, to the last,
In the hour of darkness and peril and need,
The people will waken and listen to hear
The hurrying hoof-beats of that steed,
And the midnight message of Paul Revere.
posted by gramschmidt at 3:07 AM on September 7, 2006

posted by TwelveTwo at 3:08 AM on September 7, 2006

posted by nj_subgenius at 3:10 AM on September 7, 2006

posted by sergeant sandwich at 3:11 AM on September 7, 2006

posted by pruner at 3:13 AM on September 7, 2006

posted by kjh at 3:15 AM on September 7, 2006

posted by loquacious at 3:15 AM on September 7, 2006

posted by pruner at 3:16 AM on September 7, 2006

I can't believe Morton Feldman died in 1987. It almost makes me think that everyone will eventually die.



At least John Cage is still alive, and will be, forever.
posted by gramschmidt at 3:18 AM on September 7, 2006

posted by RobertFrost at 3:18 AM on September 7, 2006

posted by pruner at 3:22 AM on September 7, 2006

meh, this is no post about that guy who had the band
posted by afu at 3:25 AM on September 7, 2006 [1 favorite has favorites]

posted by TwelveTwo at 3:29 AM on September 7, 2006

posted by gramschmidt at 3:29 AM on September 7, 2006

I think that got it.


posted by gramschmidt at 3:30 AM on September 7, 2006

posted by pruner at 3:31 AM on September 7, 2006

What the hell's going on? Snow? I'm feeling foamy! Banana slug and bacon milkshakes. Why is the sky turning green? It's raining Ted Nugent!
posted by loquacious at 3:31 AM on September 7, 2006

posted by pruner at 3:33 AM on September 7, 2006

posted by wendell at 3:35 AM on September 7, 2006

Alright, night everybody!
posted by TwelveTwo at 3:36 AM on September 7, 2006

posted by wendell at 3:36 AM on September 7, 2006

posted by pruner at 3:41 AM on September 7, 2006

Good night, 12-2. You nailed #100, by the way.


posted by gramschmidt at 3:45 AM on September 7, 2006

So this was a total joke, right? I mean, not-hooked-to-the-internet-but-going-to-install-Firefox, that was a subtle slap at nerdy got-to-be-cool types, right? No? Too subtle? Well, how about Spybot, a clue this wasn't serious, right? What do you mean you hear that kind of stuff every day! What are you, some kind of IT or something? Oh. You are. Well, hell. Hey! Look at the neat graphics and non-sequiturs and stuff people are putting up! Gosh, that's cool! (You sure this wasn't just a stupid joke?)
posted by CCBC at 3:45 AM on September 7, 2006

This thread has more than Jumped the Shark...

It has jumped INTO the shark.
posted by wendell at 3:46 AM on September 7, 2006

This will end well.

Nice call.
posted by Kudos at 3:52 AM on September 7, 2006

posted by pruner at 3:53 AM on September 7, 2006

posted by wendell at 3:56 AM on September 7, 2006

Wow.

I knew there was a reason for tonight's insomnia.
posted by cgc373 at 3:57 AM on September 7, 2006

I dunno if i've ever commented on a deleted post before. first time for everything!
posted by Foaf at 3:57 AM on September 7, 2006

CCBC - I believe I explained above, it's drugs I tells ya. As to the responses, sometimes girls just wanna have fun.
posted by scheptech at 3:58 AM on September 7, 2006

posted by wendell at 4:00 AM on September 7, 2006 [1 favorite has favorites]

gosh
posted by gomichild at 4:01 AM on September 7, 2006

That Star Wars Rocks pic was o for awesome!
posted by Foaf at 4:02 AM on September 7, 2006

Knock knock.
posted by maryh at 4:05 AM on September 7, 2006

posted by pruner at 4:08 AM on September 7, 2006

My Firefox just went crap with this thread.

WHO CAN FIX MY COMPUTER NOW?...
posted by LittlePrince at 4:08 AM on September 7, 2006

Best post of the day!
posted by effwerd at 4:10 AM on September 7, 2006

who wants pancakes?

(I miss pancakes)
posted by nprigoda at 4:12 AM on September 7, 2006

Indeed, zounds, and forsooth, prithee, Who is There?
posted by gramschmidt at 4:13 AM on September 7, 2006

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those user numbers are getting bigger , huh ?
posted by sgt.serenity at 4:14 AM on September 7, 2006

posted by pruner at 4:20 AM on September 7, 2006

I wish I had a job that didn't need me there at 8. :(
posted by thirteenkiller at 4:20 AM on September 7, 2006

Best post of the day!

It's almost the only post of the day - since this thing started 3 hours ago there's been a grand total of 2 Meta posts with 2 comments, and 0 AskMes.
posted by scheptech at 4:21 AM on September 7, 2006

Just 7 days to late for that $30, jammo.
posted by Kudos at 4:23 AM on September 7, 2006

This thread is gold =]
posted by cholly at 4:25 AM on September 7, 2006

this truly IS the best thread ever.

oh, and uh, my computer has been on since may 2002.

a better idea 4 u:

1) LEARN TO COUNT CHANGE PROPERLY.
2) RECEIPT IN MY BAG, NOT IN MY HAND UNDER MY CHANGE.
3) THEN WE'LL TALK ABOUT YOU DUSTING MY MACHINE.
posted by quonsar at 4:27 AM on September 7, 2006

posted by delmoi at 4:31 AM on September 7, 2006 [1 favorite has favorites]

posted by pruner at 4:31 AM on September 7, 2006

Oh administrator, please hope him.
posted by hugsnkisses at 4:32 AM on September 7, 2006

this mushroom? what? no, i'm not sure what kind it is. i just picked it up off the shelf. surely you would know...?
posted by UbuRoivas at 4:34 AM on September 7, 2006

Stop touching your employer's computers and let a professional handle them.





posted by kdar at 4:35 AM on September 7, 2006

hanks, pruner. I could watch the Jesus polish his ball all day.
posted by maryh at 4:37 AM on September 7, 2006

2) RECEIPT IN MY BAG, NOT IN MY HAND UNDER MY CHANGE.

I thought this was an Australia only problem, but it now seems global. Thankyou for opening my naive eyes quonsar.

Someone should start an organisation to deal with this unsavoury behaviour.
posted by a. at 4:38 AM on September 7, 2006

posted by delmoi at 4:41 AM on September 7, 2006

JamJamo. You have made the internet a better place for everyone tonight....
posted by bigmusic at 4:42 AM on September 7, 2006

posted by pruner at 4:47 AM on September 7, 2006

glad I could be of service, maryh :)
posted by pruner at 4:49 AM on September 7, 2006