Comments on: I Just Might Turn To Smoke But I Feel Fine

I Just Might Turn To Smoke But I Feel Fine

fandango_matt — Fri, 15 Sep 2006 18:56:49 -0800

The Incinolet (possible product name: The Crap Zapper!) is a waterless toilet which, according to its fans, is cleaner, less expensive, and more eco-friendly than its counterparts because it uses fire instead of water.

By: Balisong

Balisong — Fri, 15 Sep 2006 19:02:11 -0800

Well, Shit Fire!

By: dmd

dmd — Fri, 15 Sep 2006 19:02:14 -0800

What a crappy post. OOH BURN.

By: longsleeves

longsleeves — Fri, 15 Sep 2006 19:09:44 -0800

Neighbor: What on earth is that smell? Homeowner: Oh, I'm burning my shit. It's The peristaltic wave of the future! Worst smell ever!

By: jfuller

jfuller — Fri, 15 Sep 2006 19:11:33 -0800

methane-fired?

By: edverb

edverb — Fri, 15 Sep 2006 19:12:39 -0800

Waste is incinerated after each use - keeps bathroom free of odor and flies. Catalyst within the toilet keeps exhaust odor-free." In other words...flaming shit in my toilet? Odor-free my ass. Ummm, wait.

By: grabbingsand

grabbingsand — Fri, 15 Sep 2006 19:14:23 -0800

The lever is shielded by a slanted metal plate so you don't accidentally open the steel doors before you are ready to deploy a payload. Heh.

By: grabbingsand

grabbingsand — Fri, 15 Sep 2006 19:16:59 -0800

Sauron?

By: newfers

newfers — Fri, 15 Sep 2006 19:21:55 -0800

Fire? Toilet? Ass gas? what could POSSIBLY go wrong?

By: Balisong

Balisong — Fri, 15 Sep 2006 19:24:00 -0800

LOL, I'm in UR flaming toilet releasing all UR payloadz.

By: 2sheets

2sheets — Fri, 15 Sep 2006 19:25:26 -0800

That smell has to go somewhere.

By: wumpus

wumpus — Fri, 15 Sep 2006 19:30:18 -0800

the chemicals resulting in that smell is probably denatured by the extreme heat. This is a very good idea - until some prankster puts an explosive container or some flammable liquid into it. Not to say that conventional western toilets are any less susceptable to vandalism.

By: rxrfrx

rxrfrx — Fri, 15 Sep 2006 19:41:10 -0800

Disposing solid waste, the US Military In Iraq way

By: leftcoastbob

leftcoastbob — Fri, 15 Sep 2006 19:43:11 -0800

Maybe it's just me, but I believe that just the mere thought of the pits of hell mere inches from my buns would keep me constipated for the rest of my life.

By: dobbs

dobbs — Fri, 15 Sep 2006 19:46:10 -0800

I'm a breatharian. My shit don't stink.

By: Holy foxy moxie batman!

Holy foxy moxie batman! — Fri, 15 Sep 2006 19:47:14 -0800

Empty Ashpan at least once every week, more often with heavy usage.

By: madamjujujive

madamjujujive — Fri, 15 Sep 2006 20:02:29 -0800

This screams for a bit of warning.

By: banished

banished — Fri, 15 Sep 2006 20:09:26 -0800

There are also Composting Toilets.

By: Quietgal

Quietgal — Fri, 15 Sep 2006 20:12:12 -0800

Finally! An easier solution to ashbury's problem than scarabic's time-consuming, labor-intensive, inconvenient and probably smelly method! Just make sure you have enough paper liners on hand to hold all the chopped-up body parts before you whack anybody.

By: Smedleyman

Smedleyman — Fri, 15 Sep 2006 20:13:58 -0800

I always had a problem with crapping in perfectly good water.

By: Astro Zombie

Astro Zombie — Fri, 15 Sep 2006 20:16:49 -0800

Ah, sweet revenge. My shit has been burning my ass for years now.

By: Steven C. Den Beste

Steven C. Den Beste — Fri, 15 Sep 2006 20:51:30 -0800

And you thought LA had a smog problem now.

By: DesbaratsDays

DesbaratsDays — Fri, 15 Sep 2006 21:00:12 -0800

We actually have a propane-driven one (differnt make). It uses about 30 lbs of propane to burn for 6 hours, and stinks beyond belief. Have to burn once a week for 2 of us, if I pee outside. Not very satisfactory. We also have a couple of SunMar composting toilets which I much prefer, until they jam, and you have to dig out the drum to fix it. *shudder* AstroZombie wins the thread, though!

By: Bugbread

Bugbread — Fri, 15 Sep 2006 21:03:13 -0800

It also looks like it's not being touted as an alternative to flush toilets, but to composting toilets, presumably for folks without access to water mains. So whether or not it smells better or worse than a standard flush toilet, I would bet it would smell a lot better than a composting toilet.

By: rough ashlar

rough ashlar — Fri, 15 Sep 2006 21:08:15 -0800

more eco-friendly than its counterparts Right. Because there are no eco-costs to the heating method to make the fire.

By: itchylick

itchylick — Fri, 15 Sep 2006 21:28:34 -0800

Stay away from the bidet.

By: maryh

maryh — Fri, 15 Sep 2006 22:11:14 -0800

I worked with a woman a bunch of years back who was really gung-ho about getting one of these toilets. She would start describing how they worked, and then she's get this glassy, crazed look in her eyes and end with, "Just think of it... The purifying effects of fire..." She kind of freaked me out.

By: graventy

graventy — Fri, 15 Sep 2006 22:11:28 -0800

Dude, I have trouble taking the garbage out on a regular basis. That soot's just gonna pile up.

By: ryoshu

ryoshu — Fri, 15 Sep 2006 22:20:24 -0800

Because there are no eco-costs to the heating method to make the fire. It uses spotted owls for fuel.

By: cenoxo

cenoxo — Fri, 15 Sep 2006 22:51:29 -0800

Snopes' Blew Moon may become a reality yet.

By: rob511

rob511 — Fri, 15 Sep 2006 22:53:41 -0800

Has anyone run this by Johnny Cat?

By: Alex404

Alex404 — Fri, 15 Sep 2006 22:59:09 -0800

Stay away from the bidet. Ouch.

By: Davenhill

Davenhill — Sat, 16 Sep 2006 00:09:40 -0800

This seemed like a good idea at first. Then I read this from the last link:

And, yes, that is a genuine, authentic, antique (maybe) chamber pot next to the throne of fire. It's expensive to incinerate urine.

After reading that, I'm sorry to say but... I'll see the polar ice caps melt and the third world die of thirst before I give up my flush toilette.

By: sourwookie

sourwookie — Sat, 16 Sep 2006 00:33:33 -0800

What is the carbon cost?

By: flapjax at midnite

flapjax at midnite — Sat, 16 Sep 2006 01:40:23 -0800

And I say unto you, in the End Time, the Lord will smite his enemies, the toilets will ascend to the heavens and excrement will burn! BURRRRRRN!

By: mykescipark

mykescipark — Sat, 16 Sep 2006 05:56:10 -0800

This will be all the rage at Burning Man. It might just be the last thing nobody's ever thought to torch there before...

By: filmgeek

filmgeek — Sat, 16 Sep 2006 07:44:59 -0800

What happens when you fish dies? Is it a flaming burial? or a burial a sea?

By: econous

econous — Sat, 16 Sep 2006 07:51:35 -0800

10 pennies per use? No thanks. I'll stick to shitting in plastic bags and dumping it with commercial trash.

By: rough ashlar

rough ashlar — Sat, 16 Sep 2006 08:02:58 -0800

It's expensive to incinerate urine. And giving up on the valuable phosphorus via flushing....

By: BeerFilter

BeerFilter — Sat, 16 Sep 2006 08:27:49 -0800

Here's a classic textfile about the military shit burnin' rxrfrx's video depicted.

By: cenoxo

cenoxo — Sat, 16 Sep 2006 08:30:39 -0800

And watch out for that collateral damage: Giant Toilet Roll Starts Factory Fire.

By: nebulawindphone

nebulawindphone — Sat, 16 Sep 2006 08:31:33 -0800

What happens when you fish dies? Is it a flaming burial? or a burial a sea? Both, man. It's a fucken Viking funeral!

By: Tube

Tube — Sat, 16 Sep 2006 11:44:33 -0800

I seem to recall Buckminster Fuller designed such a toilet many years ago. Reading through the military perspective on this subject, I would gather that human "solids" take a great deal of heat to decompose, as it's obvious they don't burn. But remember, dried dung is still used as fuel in some parts of the world. Would dried human solids burn? Would you want to be around while it dried? Thinking about this further, the dried dung that does burn comes from animals that consume cellulose based foods, and thus must have flamable cellulose in their wastes. I'll bet dried human solids would not burn...

By: rxrfrx

rxrfrx — Sat, 16 Sep 2006 16:14:30 -0800

Thanks BeerFilter, I sort of vaguely remembered that textfile, but it got confused in my head with a bunch of Doonesbury strips where the dudes are in the Gulf War.

By: five fresh fish

five fresh fish — Sat, 16 Sep 2006 18:56:34 -0800

After reading that, I'm sorry to say but... I'll see the polar ice caps melt and the third world die of thirst before I give up my flush toilette. Chickenshit.

By: Steven C. Den Beste

Steven C. Den Beste — Sat, 16 Sep 2006 21:20:32 -0800

Dried herbivore manure is burned because it isn't digested very well and it contains a great deal of cellulose. It won't work with fecal output of omnivores or carnivores.

By: greatgefilte

greatgefilte — Sat, 16 Sep 2006 23:18:54 -0800

Take the flame inside/you burn and burn below...

By: GuyZero

GuyZero — Sun, 17 Sep 2006 19:49:03 -0800

Two days and not one Johnny Cash joke. Man. This place is slipping. The taste of love is sweet when hearts like our's meet I fell for you like a child oh, but the fire went wild..