The Pierre

September 30, 2006 4:22 PM

The Penthouse Wondering what to do with the $70 mil. that Granny left you in her will? You could buy that private tropical island you have had your eye on but that's a 30 hour trip in your private jet. Wouldn't you really be happier here?
posted by vronsky (43 comments total)

Its not the $70mil purchase that gets you. That $44k/year really starts to add up after a while...

Cool apartment though.
posted by DesbaratsDays at 4:29 PM on September 30, 2006

I dont understand why this worthy of a post. There's lots of interesting properties around the world for sale - enormous penthouses, islands, castles etc.

What is this, a real estate directory?
posted by vacapinta at 4:32 PM on September 30, 2006

vronsky, are you a real-estate agent? why do you keep trying to sell us properties?
posted by wumpus at 4:33 PM on September 30, 2006

I think it would be kind of strange to walk around a huge city and always be able to point to my house. "There it is. There it is again. Oh, it's behind that other building. Move over this way. See? There it is again."

Of course, if I'm wealthy enough to own the top floors of a skyscraper, I'm also wealthy enough to rename it the Baxter Building and fly around in my Fantasticar.
posted by frogan at 4:34 PM on September 30, 2006

vronsky, are you a real-estate agent? why do you keep trying to sell us properties?

With all the mefites sitting around wondering how to blow $70 million

The bizzare thing is, vronsky actually mentioned this place in his last post, so why make two posts at all?
posted by delmoi at 4:37 PM on September 30, 2006

It actually looks rather small from the outside.
posted by delmoi at 4:39 PM on September 30, 2006

That's what she said.
posted by interrobang at 4:40 PM on September 30, 2006 [2 favorites]

oh snap, interrobang!
posted by wumpus at 4:44 PM on September 30, 2006

... or, he said.
posted by cell divide at 4:47 PM on September 30, 2006

The Pierre Hotel offers every conceivable service twenty-four hours a day.

English-to-Icelandic translation of 100 page-plus documents at an instant, at 3:30 a.m., and on glossy stock paper, delivered to my door with a mimosa, just because?

Plo chops?
posted by raysmj at 4:49 PM on September 30, 2006

It looks like a good place from which to cast down large stones upon my enemies heads but I am unsure of its giant ape proofiness.
posted by Iron Rat at 4:49 PM on September 30, 2006

MeFi has turned into Curbed.
posted by bim at 4:57 PM on September 30, 2006

Screw that, $70M penthouses are for paupers.

Try this $135M Aspen estate on for size.
posted by mr_crash_davis at 4:58 PM on September 30, 2006

crash, if that house doesn't have a geothermal heating system then it should be considered a crime against humanity to occupy it during an Aspen winter.
posted by George_Spiggott at 5:02 PM on September 30, 2006

The $44k is per month.
posted by dame at 5:11 PM on September 30, 2006

...and covers crimes against humanity.
posted by weapons-grade pandemonium at 5:14 PM on September 30, 2006

It makes you wonder who would buy such a place...just how many people are in the market for a $70M penthouse ?
posted by lobstah at 5:21 PM on September 30, 2006

If I can get a guanteed Spider-Man sighting once a day, I might think about it.

(I'll take a moodey-lookin' Batman perching, but you're going to have to knock the price down a bit. And that cape better be swaying dramatically in the wind.)
posted by Cyrano at 5:25 PM on September 30, 2006

The Aspen ranch ... I threw up a little bit.
posted by xod at 5:57 PM on September 30, 2006

Yeech! That's not a house it's a hotel...
posted by twsf at 6:00 PM on September 30, 2006

just how many people are in the market for a $70M penthouse ?

I can think of 400.
posted by landis at 6:00 PM on September 30, 2006

The Hala Estate is Bandar Bush bin Sultan's place. Save the vomit for next time at the pump, xod. (better RMN description)
posted by swell at 6:01 PM on September 30, 2006

The $44k is per month.

$52 million for 100 years. Chump change to some elites... but still, when you're talking that kind of money there's going to be some wiggle room.
posted by chef_boyardee at 6:03 PM on September 30, 2006

swell, thanks. Now I have some on me. I'm gonna go wash up.
posted by xod at 6:10 PM on September 30, 2006

The Hala Estate is Bandar Bush bin Sultan's place. Save the vomit for next time at the pump, xod. (better RMN description)

A couple of the guys I work for have been there. Apparently it's pretty nice.
posted by monju_bosatsu at 6:11 PM on September 30, 2006

Bandar bin Sultan is also a good friend of Jimmy Carter.
posted by delmoi at 6:11 PM on September 30, 2006

This penthouse post combined with the Vatu Vara island for sale yesterday ... vronsky, here are some Ex-hospitals and nursing homes you might be interested in.
posted by xod at 6:21 PM on September 30, 2006

Why thank you, vronsky!

I was actually wondering what to do with the gazillions of dollars that just fell into my lap.

I spent a good part of this evening thinking about your offer and ultimately decided to pick up a nice little brownstone in Brooklyn, for a fraction of the price of this apartment.

And I'll spend the rest of my money on hookers and crack.

(But don't mind me, vronsky. I'm just a philistine. I have no imagination . . . )
posted by jason's_planet at 6:54 PM on September 30, 2006

Here's some U.S. Forest Service fire lookouts for 9 dollars.
posted by xod at 7:08 PM on September 30, 2006

The thing I keep thinking is what kind of commission the real estate salespeople will make if this thing sells.
posted by milnak at 7:25 PM on September 30, 2006

Crap post.

And "French château" ???

GTF
posted by fire&wings at 7:27 PM on September 30, 2006

Can someone explain the 42% tax deduction? The buyer can take 30 million off his/her taxes?
posted by dances_with_sneetches at 7:44 PM on September 30, 2006

delmoi - Prince Bandar has formed close relationships with several American presidents, notably George H.W. Bush and George W. Bush, who gave him the affectionate nickname "Bandar Bush". (wiki)

In the May issue of The Atlantic, Robert Baer, a retired CIA agent, wrote that, around the Bush family Kennebunkport, Me., compound, the prince is known as "Bandar Bush." (NatPost via mattwelch)

Can't find anything that indicates a particularly close relationship with Carter (or Ford, Reagan, Clinton, etc.) - but Bandar's unusually tight with W. Though by all reports he's quite a nice person.
posted by swell at 7:51 PM on September 30, 2006

d-w-sneetches: The 42% tax deduction refers to the percentage of the maintenance that is tax deductible. The monthly maintenance charge, in a co-op, pays for any common-area charges that everyone in the building shares: the doorman/concierge, cleaning of the common areas, heat/hot water, periodic repairs/updates/maintenance, etc. etc., and the underlying mortgage on the building*. So, in this case, 42% of the monthly $44k can be taken as a tax deduction. I believe the tax deductible portion is the percentage that pays for the interest on the underlying mortgage, though I may be wrong about that. But anyway, it will give the billionaire penthouse co-op owner a bit back on his taxes every year. Which is nice.

* - when you buy a co-op, you're really only buying shares in a cooperative that owns the building. So the underlying mortgage on the building doesn't go away when the building goes co-op. You'd think a hugely fancy building from the 20s would've paid off its mortgage long ago, but something has to pay for all that frippery, doesn't it?
posted by blueloggy at 8:26 PM on September 30, 2006

In 1948, Jimmy Carter was unofficially stationed at King Abdul-Aziz Naval Base in Jubail, Saudi Arabia. Carter's frequent visits in late June, 1948, to Taif have been noted by none of his biographers.

Needless to say, Prince Bandar was born in Taif on March 2, 1949.

While the joint purchase of 1202 Mansion Woods Road in Annapolis made by a 16 year old Sudanese woman named Khizaran and Mr. Carter has not yet been fully documented, the house is currently for sale.
posted by xod at 8:42 PM on September 30, 2006

"The living room is considered the most magnificent privately owned room in the world. "

Yeah, the Pope lives in such a hovel.

Besides, if I were going to spend that kind of money, I'd buy more than one place.

Starting with one of these.

OK, maybe a place on the North Shore and Telegraph Hill for a start.
posted by Relay at 8:57 PM on September 30, 2006

I heard that the Stay-Puft Marshmallow Man insurance on that place is just ridiculous.
posted by idontlikewords at 9:49 PM on September 30, 2006

laundry in building: yes

i can honestly understand how that might be a deal-breaker.
posted by arialblack at 10:44 PM on September 30, 2006

The penthouse is nice, but how about country estate living with some nature and your own barnyard with llamas??
posted by rvastag at 12:57 AM on October 1, 2006

They do like hyperbole. From the Aspen listing: "Perhaps the most magnificent property ever offered for sale anywhere in the world. "

Come on. It's still a ranch.
posted by craven_morhead at 8:16 AM on October 1, 2006

"From the Aspen listing: "Perhaps the most magnificent property ever offered for sale anywhere in the world. ""

Well of course craven_morhead, That Frank Lloyd Wright was such a little bitch.
posted by Relay at 10:53 AM on October 1, 2006

Yeah, the Pope lives in such a hovel.

The Apostolic Palace is owned by the government of Vatican City, and therefore includes, like the White House, one of the most magnificent publicly-owned living rooms in the world.
posted by ChasFile at 2:23 PM on October 1, 2006

Come to London for stupidly priced houses - Lakshmi Mittal did...
posted by patricio at 3:35 PM on October 1, 2006