Planning your dream wedding

October 18, 2006 12:37 AM

Altar•ations [flash] Remember YOU'RE in control.
posted by tellurian (16 comments total)

Virginity Management?
posted by lemonfridge at 1:25 AM on October 18, 2006

This is way to confusing for my all nighter pulling procrastinating self.
posted by ztdavis at 2:03 AM on October 18, 2006

It's a parody. And well done.
posted by recurve at 3:10 AM on October 18, 2006

"make a better baby....tanned Toddler (95000.00)" This is fake and this is good. The people talking at the begining of each page is what really makes it for me.
posted by CaptMcalister at 4:23 AM on October 18, 2006

needs more batshitinsane tag, kthxbye
posted by Slithy_Tove at 4:33 AM on October 18, 2006

I had just designed a wonderful $325,000 cocoa bean baby when the browser crashed. It was clever.
posted by sohcahtoa at 5:13 AM on October 18, 2006

Digging deeper into the engagement ring section gives a history of the 'tradition' of diamond engagement rings and an overview of conflict diamonds. A+
posted by mkb at 5:25 AM on October 18, 2006

Heh. Pretty funny.

What is virginity?

Virginity is like a military shield that protects women, children, and other private property from invading terrorist forces.
posted by Stauf at 6:18 AM on October 18, 2006

The whole Bridezilla phenom is bizarre (do these women exist, or is reality tv is creating them?). So cheers for this, thanks tellurian, and excellent work, Univeristy of Tampa women. A snappy tagline to Altar-ations would have helped to cue that it's subversive ...
posted by thinkpiece at 8:37 AM on October 18, 2006

It's pretty sad that I know a few people who would not realize it is a parody.
posted by wilde at 9:03 AM on October 18, 2006

Yes, thinkpiece. You are so right. As I watch this post languish between a Google video and a MSN news article, I recompose the post over and over. Something along the lines of:

Do you want the ring you have always desired, the perfect marriage, the perfect baby? We'll show you how to find it all at Altar•ations (Remember, you're in charge).

This is a wonderful piece of work that is presented humorously but also has a deep underlying message (as evidenced by the articles it links to, as mkb pointed out.) My mistake and a wasted opportunity on my part.
On Preview: I know a few people who would not realize it is a parody
That is indeed worrisome.
posted by tellurian at 9:25 AM on October 18, 2006

A+++ The best parody on these topics that I have ever seen. Very well done.
posted by arcticwoman at 9:31 AM on October 18, 2006

That was terrific! So very well done.
posted by LeeJay at 1:32 PM on October 18, 2006

No,no, tellurian, I meant the site itself needs a great tagline ... yours did the job! Altar-ations -- the bridezilla antidote. (I don't have time to really do it properly ...)
posted by thinkpiece at 2:07 PM on October 18, 2006

And yes, there really are bridezillas. One of my best friends was. Before she was even engaged, she told her boyfriend exactly how many carats her ring HAD to be, in what shape, etc. I wanted to kill her on her wedding day, she was so obnoxious. Luckily, she relaxed as soon as the ceremony was over and the rest of the night was fun.
This was a well done site, thank you for this post!
posted by annieb at 5:33 PM on October 18, 2006

Not only are there bridezillas, but Momzillas and Dadzillas too. I was just at a wedding this summer which the Mother and Father of the groom drove up the price and complexity to the point of madness. ( $200k maybe? hard to say. ). Unfortunately, the couple seperated within a few months of getting married. I suspect the groom's parents attitude was responsible for stressing out the newlyweds to the point of snapping.

My wife and I spent ~$5k for a wedding about 3 years ago in the silicon valley for ~75 guests, and we were very happy with the results, especially compared to some of the wedding$ we've been to since.
posted by BrotherCaine at 6:06 PM on October 18, 2006