101 Most Influential People Who Never Lived
October 25, 2006 10:17 AM   Subscribe

101 Most Influential People Who Never Lived is a book chronicling the most impactful (non-religious) fictional characters throughout history. While they only tease with the first 50 characters on the book's homepage, the hard hitting investigative journalists at USA Today have uncovered the entire 101 for your arguing enjoyment.
posted by jonson (98 comments total) 1 user marked this as a favorite
 
Jesus isn't on there? Oh, right. He's totally real, and he totally lived once.
posted by interrobang at 10:20 AM on October 25, 2006


Damn, I wanted to make the Jesus comment.
posted by xmutex at 10:21 AM on October 25, 2006


No Homer Simpson?
posted by TwoWordReview at 10:27 AM on October 25, 2006


non-religious, snarkys.
posted by jonson at 10:28 AM on October 25, 2006


They had room for J.R. Ewing, but not Charlie Brown? Good grief!
posted by The Card Cheat at 10:31 AM on October 25, 2006


No Holden Caulfield?
posted by Flashman at 10:32 AM on October 25, 2006


Well, they had to make it a non-religious list, or they'd totally lose no matter who they had on there and who they left out.
posted by evilangela at 10:34 AM on October 25, 2006


Also, Joe Camel wuz ranked way too low. If it hadn't been for him, I would never have taken up pool.
posted by The Card Cheat at 10:34 AM on October 25, 2006


I dont get #19. The American Cowboy never lived?
posted by vacapinta at 10:37 AM on October 25, 2006


Buffy the Vampire Slayer in the top 50???
posted by ibmcginty at 10:38 AM on October 25, 2006


The Little Engine That Could and Godzilla are people?

Citizen Kane never lived? Even as Wm. Randolph Hearst?

Don't wander around New Hampster saying Uncle Sam never existed.

Where is Lemuel Gulliver? Winston Smith? Captain Queeg?
posted by Kirth Gerson at 10:42 AM on October 25, 2006


Spiderman isn't on the list, and Superman is 64 while "Siegfried" is number 7?

This list was made by snobs, morons, or both.
posted by Megafly at 10:42 AM on October 25, 2006


They don't obey their own religious caveat. Prometheus, Venus, Cupid, and Pandora are all religious figures (and what's the deal with Venus & Cupid being one person?). I suppose it's only true religions that are off-limits.
posted by Humanzee at 10:46 AM on October 25, 2006


"Big Brother" is second? As what, a role model?

Many of the rest are no-brainers, but Buffy? Above Venus? Cupid? Saint Valentine? Buck Rodgers? Luke Skywalker!?! WTF?

That's it. I'm so inventing a time machine and going back and killing Joss Whedon's grandparents.
posted by loquacious at 10:48 AM on October 25, 2006


"Spiderman isn't on the list, and Superman is 64 while "Siegfried" is number 7?"

The fact that the Marlboro Man is number one is a big clue that the list is based not on how well known the character is but on it's actual effect on the real world. Siegfried is a huge symbol of the national identity of Germans, and we all know what happens when Germans get hung up on national identity.
posted by ereshkigal45 at 10:50 AM on October 25, 2006


This list was made by snobs, morons, or both

Snorons...

Also, XQ is absolutely right, the absence of Uncle Sam is the most glaring mistake here, worse even than Buffy.
posted by jonson at 10:51 AM on October 25, 2006


Uncle Sam is #61.
posted by loquacious at 10:53 AM on October 25, 2006


D'oh. On preview I missed XQ's pointing out that US is on the full list. I'm lame.
posted by jonson at 10:53 AM on October 25, 2006


Godzilla, Bambi, the Ugly Duckling, HAL 9000 and the Loch Ness Monster were very influential people.
posted by rogue haggis landing at 10:53 AM on October 25, 2006


Impactful - bwahahahahahahahahaha
posted by fixedgear at 10:53 AM on October 25, 2006 [2 favorites]


A good number of those are, if nothing else, at least somewhat based on real people—Big Brother (Stalin), King Arthur and Santa Claus all have at least some grounding in historical figures.
posted by jefgodesky at 10:55 AM on October 25, 2006


No Holden Caulfield?

The authors did not want to be accused of being phony.
posted by Kwantsar at 10:57 AM on October 25, 2006 [1 favorite]


No d'Artagnan, Athos, Aramis, or Porthos. That's B.S.

They don't even have La Liberte. That's complete and total B.S.
posted by oddman at 11:04 AM on October 25, 2006


Siegfried never actually lived?! Roy is the greatest fucking magician of all time!
posted by ND¢ at 11:05 AM on October 25, 2006


The Marloboro Man is #1? Please tell me this is not sequential.
posted by JJ86 at 11:05 AM on October 25, 2006


Buffy the Vampire Slayer, but no Harry Potter

St. Valentine (who by my best knowledge existed) but no Homer Simpson.

And, though I simply skimmed the list, I didn't notice Frodo on there either. I'm not really a LotR freak, but I know too many of them to not think that he was influential.

Whatever, though. Clearly, the list isn't going to be scientifically derived, and some redundant characters had to be left out or joined (Venus & Cupid, Kirk & Spock) and others (Buffy) had to be but in so as to pretend to be hip. We compile a similar list here and have it be every bit as valid.
posted by Navelgazer at 11:06 AM on October 25, 2006


Where's William Boot? I'm outraged!
posted by william_boot at 11:07 AM on October 25, 2006


Luke Skywalker makes the cut but Darth Vader doesn't? Clearly suspect. Vader's influence can be seen in much modern policy and diplomatic protocol. Anyone following Luke's example wouldn't stand a chance.
posted by tomsk at 11:09 AM on October 25, 2006 [1 favorite]


Why lump Tom Sawyer and Huckleberry Finn together? They're dissimilar characters, and Huck alone would deserve a much higher rating whereas Tom Sawyer's lasting influence seems to be confined to fence-painting and its metaphorical cognates.
posted by George_Spiggott at 11:13 AM on October 25, 2006


Kramer? Does it matter that the character's creator is the actor?
posted by weapons-grade pandemonium at 11:14 AM on October 25, 2006


The fact that the Marlboro Man is number one is a big clue that the list is based not on how well known the character is but on it's actual effect on the real world

Right, and the subtitle of the book implies the same thing:

"how characters of fiction, myth, legends, television, and movies have shaped our society, changed our behavior, and set the course of history".

In that case, the TV characters are just silly:

32. Archie Bunker
39. Mary Richards
44. Buffy the Vampire Slayer
50. Captain Kirk and Mr. Spock
63. J.R. Ewing
67. Kermit the Frog
86. Perry Mason

Even if they were the most, oh, significant TV characters, how have any of them "shaped our society, changed our behavior, and set the course of history"?

This might have been an interesting idea if they hadn't dumbed it down so much.
posted by Armitage Shanks at 11:14 AM on October 25, 2006


St. Nick actually existed. He wasn't a jolly man is a red suit, but he was a real person.
posted by Astro Zombie at 11:15 AM on October 25, 2006


How about my girlfriend? She's fictional. Where does she fall on the list?
posted by spicynuts at 11:17 AM on October 25, 2006


I immediately thought Don Q, Ahab, Odysseus--and there they were!

Also surprised at no Holden.
posted by dontoine at 11:22 AM on October 25, 2006


Marianne and Britannia are two huuuuge omissions, if they're really talking about influence - it would be a very different world today without British imperialism and French republicanism.
posted by goo at 11:23 AM on October 25, 2006


St. Nick actually existed. He wasn't a jolly man is a red suit, but he was a real person.

Yes, but Santa Claus--the jolly man in the red suit--not so much. But of the top five, three have at least some historical basis.

St. Valentine (who by my best knowledge existed)

A fine example of the opposite trajectory, actually. Valentine is presumed to be historical by most people, but probably wasn't. As opposed to, say, King Arthur, who's generally presumed to be entirely made up, but almost certainly has at least some historical core, regardless of how far removed that core is from the legends that eventually sprang up around it.
posted by jefgodesky at 11:25 AM on October 25, 2006


Hey!!!!! Don't mess with the Slayer!!!!
posted by Pendragon at 11:25 AM on October 25, 2006


How on earth they left out Bart or Homer Simpson eludes me. Is it only the stuff that the Smithsonian has acknowledged?
posted by Down10 at 11:29 AM on October 25, 2006


Interesting list. It does, however, seem totally biased towards the west. Not many Asian/Middle Eastern/African/Latin American figures on the list, if any.

Then again, lists like this are always, how shall we say, "made up". Hence people reading it and getting their argue on.
posted by cvoid at 11:30 AM on October 25, 2006


I think they should have left any and all Greek mythology out of it as well. There's just too many characters and they'd dominate the list.
posted by Down10 at 11:32 AM on October 25, 2006


I *do* like their having included Hans Beckert. M is one of my faves.
But - The Wandering Jew at #92??

WTF?!? Mammy at #81?

Who was on the selection committee?
posted by nj_subgenius at 11:34 AM on October 25, 2006


But wait, Odysseus was real!
or not
posted by Pastabagel at 11:38 AM on October 25, 2006


I think we're all looking at the list way too literally. Most of the list consists of characters who are reflective of certain times, or movements, or social changes. Example: Mary Richards reflected the acceptance of single working women. Perry Mason brought the esoteric workings of the courtroom straight into the living room so that fifty years later we can all argue with the DA's decisions on L&O.
posted by ereshkigal45 at 11:39 AM on October 25, 2006


I think the primary point of the list was for them to use it as a jumping-off point for a bunch of essays about culture and history. I don't think it was meant to be authoritative.
posted by empath at 11:46 AM on October 25, 2006


Any list of important fictional characters that excludes him is not worth talking about.
posted by Danf at 11:47 AM on October 25, 2006


Buffy is on the list because, admit it, one night you were feeling lonely, UPN was on, and the lotion was just so warm.
posted by robocop is bleeding at 11:54 AM on October 25, 2006


Bugs Bunny
Indiana Jones
Rick Blaine
Det. John McClane
The first zombie in Night of the Living Dead

And yes, Homer Simpson.

This list doesn't have them. This list is now dead to me.
posted by quin at 12:02 PM on October 25, 2006


Buffy is on the list because, admit it, one night you were feeling lonely, UPN was on, and the lotion was just so warm.

... ceiling cat?
posted by ND¢ at 12:03 PM on October 25, 2006


Buffy is on the list because, admit it, one night you were feeling lonely, UPN was on, and the lotion was just so warm.

Well it started that way but then the evil Angel kept barging in and ruining the whole scenario. It sucks when, even in one's fantasies, one dies a slow, painful, humiliating death and then goes to hell forever.
posted by Danf at 12:09 PM on October 25, 2006


I would hope that list isn't sequential, because Superman would be right up there at the top, and Santa would be ranked higher than the Marlboro Man.
posted by MegoSteve at 12:12 PM on October 25, 2006


Guys made the list - thus Elizabeth Bennett and Mr. Darcy were overlooked?
posted by Cranberry at 12:17 PM on October 25, 2006


For some strange reason, before I looked at the list, I said to myself "Atticus Finch better have made it".

He did. List is good. That is all.
posted by Benny Andajetz at 12:21 PM on October 25, 2006


Sorry, Everyman...you got screwed again.
posted by Smart Dalek at 12:27 PM on October 25, 2006


Kilroy wasn't here.
posted by taosbat at 12:27 PM on October 25, 2006


If you're gonna make a list of the 101 most influential people who never lived, and not include Homer Simpson, then why even bother in the first place?
posted by jefbla at 12:53 PM on October 25, 2006


Hey man, what the fuck? I mean, where the fuck is the dude, Walter?
posted by Mister_A at 12:55 PM on October 25, 2006


impactful is not a word
posted by cellphone at 12:59 PM on October 25, 2006


Unless you've hav Bubbie's chopped liver, you haven't lived... the list is bunk.
posted by Phantast at 1:06 PM on October 25, 2006


Dilbert! Hello!!?! Where is he?

He's only one of the greatest political commentators and philosophers of our time, along with his egomaniacal little dog, and evil, crazed cat.
posted by Inglesa Loquita at 1:23 PM on October 25, 2006


Considering how much modern political philosophy is based on advice given to the guy, I'd say The Prince should have been on the list.
posted by forrest at 1:25 PM on October 25, 2006


Phantast, um, what?
posted by cgc373 at 1:29 PM on October 25, 2006


No Kilgore Trout?
I'm going back to sleep.
posted by squidfartz at 1:39 PM on October 25, 2006


Hey!!!!! Don't mess with the Slayer!!!!

Your excessively enthusiastic abuse of exclaimative punctuation and overly moist fanboy/girl-ish umbrage only proves my well-made point.

Primarily: that the only thing good to come out of the Buffy empire was the original movie, and that's only 'cause there was that awesomely melodramatic death scene with Pee Wee Herman.

Alternately: We could indeed use a time machine to erase all evidence of Buffy and/or Joss Whedon's existence, and the only loss to human culture would be a distinct reduction in the volume of terrible and (terribly disturbing) slashfic/fanfic. As a bonus gift from humanity to itself there'd be far fewer people believing they were actually vampires or otherkin.
posted by loquacious at 1:45 PM on October 25, 2006


The ugly duckling? The little engine that could?

Why not include "Weapons of Mass Destruction"?
posted by sour cream at 1:54 PM on October 25, 2006


No timelords?
posted by feelinglistless at 1:55 PM on October 25, 2006


Considering how much modern political philosophy is based on advice given to the guy, I'd say The Prince should have been on the list.

Oh, the Prince was real.
posted by jefgodesky at 1:56 PM on October 25, 2006


As I understand it, each entry is defended by a page or two, so if you have a serious issue with the list, go down to your local Barnes & Noble/Borders/Waterstones/[insert country-specific book chain here] and flip through the book. Marlboro Man killed thousands vai cigarettes, Big Brother changed the way we think about government interference and involvement, Buffy helped thousands discover they were gay, etc (JOKE! JOKE!). I'm guessing there are relatively persuasive arguments. As with all lists, this is weighted towards personal experiences of the author: Western and modern characters get more coverage. In a thousand years, I'm guessing the 500th edition will be missing a lot of recent characters who will lose relevance as time goes one, but that many of the more long-standing characters (Odysseus, Pandora) will still be there.

Oh, and my snark: Pandora should be much higher, if one considers that she embodies the negative stereotype of women as inherently harmful in action. Even if not based exclusively on this myth, for certain this belief perpetuated sexist societal structures until the present day.
posted by Deathalicious at 2:01 PM on October 25, 2006


Eddie (from Iron Maiden)
posted by hal9k at 2:16 PM on October 25, 2006


I can't help but notice that the list is exclusively European/American focused, despite the huge impact of fictional characters from other parts of the world... Emperor Jimu, for example, the mythic First Emperor of Japan, grandson of the sun goddess Amaterasu. That fictional person lead to a little thing we called the Pacific theatre of World War II. Surely he's a bit more important to the world than Archie Bunker.
posted by sotonohito at 3:01 PM on October 25, 2006 [1 favorite]


the Prince was real.
No, he wasn't -- at least not anymore than Citizen Kane is William Hearst or William Tell or King Arthur were real. The monarchical ruler in Machiavelli's book was modeled on Cesare Borgia, but was not actually him.
posted by forrest at 3:10 PM on October 25, 2006


Buffy was the only fictional character I've ever had a properly long dream about.* And the show was fun. However, her being on a list like this: what?

* - She had black cherry lipstick on, and we were on a train. And may I just say, damn, damn.

posted by blacklite at 3:19 PM on October 25, 2006


aww, fuck, I forgot to close my sup tag. That's what I get for trying to be clever.
posted by blacklite at 3:20 PM on October 25, 2006


Beowulf and Grendel? Gilgamesh and Enkidu? Br'er Rabbit? John Henry? Pecos Bill? Mike Fink? Molly Pitcher? Marianne? Charlie Brown? The Yellow Kid? The Three Stooges? Bugs Bunny? Ronald MacDonald?
posted by erniepan at 3:45 PM on October 25, 2006


Two more omissions:
1) The entity known as Dick Cheney — nobody knows where (or if) he sleeps, he shoots friends with impunity, and his "heart" is artificially controlled.
2) mattamyn
posted by rob511 at 3:53 PM on October 25, 2006


Ummm, nitpick? I realize a lot of people don't believe in the divinity & related folderol of Y'shua Hannosri, but...fictitiious?
posted by pax digita at 4:25 PM on October 25, 2006


No Maldoror? No Ubu Roi? Merdre!
posted by UbuRoivas at 4:29 PM on October 25, 2006



Guys made the list - thus Elizabeth Bennett and Mr. Darcy were overlooked?


I was also shocked at the ommision of Emma Woodhouse.
posted by cholly at 4:47 PM on October 25, 2006


Hm. No Godot, either. Pathetic.
posted by UbuRoivas at 4:49 PM on October 25, 2006


There were some interesting entries, and many I agreed with, but the order of importance is so out of whack. I love Buffy, but no way in a month of Sundays is she more influential than Luke Skywalker, let alone Helen of Troy. the show just isn't old enough.

Pure influence should be measured by age, tempered by lastingness. 20th cen things are fresher, but have influenced less people because they've been around less time.
posted by jb at 4:55 PM on October 25, 2006


Where am I? :(
posted by dobbs at 5:17 PM on October 25, 2006


loquacious : Alternately: We could indeed use a time machine to erase all evidence of Buffy and/or Joss Whedon's existence, and the only loss to human culture would be a distinct reduction in the volume of terrible and (terribly disturbing) slashfic/fanfic...

On the other hand, if eliminated Joss Whedon's existence, we would also eliminate Firefly, an act which would constitute a crime against the full sum of humanity.

And yes, Pee Wee's death scene is one of the finest moments ever captured on film.

Ever.
posted by quin at 5:23 PM on October 25, 2006


Pee Wee...died? I didn't know...
posted by taosbat at 5:37 PM on October 25, 2006


These people are idiots. Where is The Bogeyman? And why don’t they include George Bush? He’s less a legitimate human being than the Marlboro man.

Wait a minute... there’s a thing on NPR right now about a pampered pet pig.
posted by Huplescat at 5:58 PM on October 25, 2006


Where is my favorite fictional entity X? And what about my second favorite Y! This list was obviously made by commie nazi pig fucking liberal conservatives, or else it would have Z!

no quonsar?
posted by Kwine at 7:43 PM on October 25, 2006


FREE QUONSAR!!*

*Offer void where prohibited. Fish and pants sold separately. May mock you and everyone within earshot, mercilessly, even your grandmother. Air shipping not available on this item. Warning: May contain sharks, snarks or both. Processed in a facility that handles tree nuts. If FREE QUONSAR begins to smoke or sputter, run away and seek shelter.
posted by loquacious at 8:40 PM on October 25, 2006


Bueller? . . . Bueller?
posted by Crabby Appleton at 9:30 PM on October 25, 2006


No Ronald Reagan? The list is meaningless.

Wait, what?
posted by I Am Not a Lobster at 9:52 PM on October 25, 2006


Some of these are really silly.

I mean, I like To Kill a Mockingbird and all, but there's no way Atticus Finch is a more influential character than, say, Batman.
posted by Target Practice at 1:32 AM on October 26, 2006


That's it. I'm so inventing a time machine and going back and killing Joss Whedon's grandparents.

Not John Whedon! Life without "Opie's Ill-Gotten Gain" wouldn't just be worth livin'!
posted by Katemonkey at 3:52 AM on October 26, 2006



Rewind back to the "Where's Jesus?" and the whole supposed-non-religious theme, just for a second...

Sure, I can understand looking at the Greek/Roman pantheons, and thinking more "not-existed" and "mythological" than religious (despite the fact that people worshipped them)... but how the hell did Lilith get on the list, then?
posted by Adelwolf at 8:52 AM on October 26, 2006


I guess Pecos Bill, Paul Bunyan and John Henry the Steel Drivin' Man could not be reached for comment.
posted by pax digita at 10:09 AM on October 26, 2006


Lilith was the perfect foil for Frasier Crane. Bebe Neuwirth made that character come alive.
posted by chicobangs at 12:04 PM on October 26, 2006


My initial reaction, as a Buffy fan, was "you must be kidding."

However.

Whether it's true or not, a lot of people claimed at the time that the show started a big rush of strong female characters and feminine empowerment in media. If items are on this list for impact to society/entertainment then perhaps that's the justification.

I think you might also claim it was a precursor to a return to serial stories in television. I'm sure someone will come up with some right after I say this but I'm drawing a blank on other similarly successful shows* that consistently had full-season storylines. Now there's many shows on that follow the model but then?

*that's why I'm leaving you out, B5. Sorry.
posted by phearlez at 12:35 PM on October 26, 2006


Troy, NY sure thinks Uncle Sam was a real man. Not only do they think he is buried there, but they named several rollerskating rinks and auto parts stores after him*.

(this last bit may not be entirely true, but it is full of truthiness, and you get the idea)
posted by bobobox at 1:41 PM on October 26, 2006


Where is Area Man?
posted by stargell at 2:20 PM on October 26, 2006 [1 favorite]


pax digita: There are many doubts as to the existance of a historical Christ, completely aside from questions of divinity. The entire birth story, for example, has to be completely fictional. Rome did not conduct census by requiring people to return to the birthplace of the man of the house, simple historic fact. The court records of Pontius Pilate have no record of a trial such as described in the Bible. Etc, etc, etc.
posted by sotonohito at 3:17 PM on October 26, 2006


I'm teaching Henry IV part I at the moment, so I'm prone to notice this -- where the heck's Falstaff?

There are three big reasons to add this guy (no pun intended):-

like Sherlock Holmes, he escaped from the original fiction, finding his way into a sequel (Henry IV part II, largely written as a vehicle for Falstaff) and an independent comedy (Merry Wives of Windsor); Shakespeare also used him to drum up interest in Henry V when he promised his audience that he would "continue the story, with Sir John in it" (this in the epilogue of 2 Henry IV). Sadly, all Sir John does in Henry V is die offstage -- he never appears.

In the period, other writers used him in pastiches, parodies and sketches.

Since Shakespeare's day, he's been the subject of three operas, one by Verdi, one by Salieri, and a third by Vaughn Williams; a composition by Elgar; a series of engravings by Cruikshank; a a film by Orson Welles and a slew of books. He has given his name to a brewery (despite the fact that he drank sack, not beer), a rose , a ship, a fatly phallic rocket (Mistress Quickly would blush) bars in many countries and a a font..

I rest my case.
posted by jrochest at 4:13 PM on October 26, 2006


And a really yummy apple.
posted by jb at 5:18 PM on October 26, 2006


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