Pizza in Three Dimensions "Every few years, a product comes along that completely changes its category. As the iPod has revolutionized the way people interact with music; as cell phones and wireless internet access has altered the way they communicate, so, too, will the way they approach eating change with the introduction of Pizzacono, the first dramatically new way to consume pizza in recent memory." posted by sportbucket (93 comments total)
1 user marked this as a favorite
They ran the old pizzacono guy right out of business... posted by spilon at 1:33 PM on November 3, 2006
Pizza in a cone? Ewwww. I like my pizza just the way it is. If it ain't broke, don't fix it. This will be a huge flop. posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 1:33 PM on November 3, 2006 [1 favorite]
Isn't this basically a calzone in a slightly different shape? posted by mach at 1:35 PM on November 3, 2006
This doesn't even touch a good calzone and sure as hell is no Cochicken. But it may be Pepsi Blew. posted by isopraxis at 1:37 PM on November 3, 2006
Apparently this is a trend that's been predicted to blow up in the US since last year sometime. See also here and here. posted by sportbucket at 1:37 PM on November 3, 2006
Pizza in the morning
Pizza at suppertime
Now that pizza's on a bagel
You can eat pizza anytime! posted by rxrfrx at 1:39 PM on November 3, 2006
Marie: You live here? Oh, it's nice. Did you decorate it? Navin: Yeah, I got all this stuff from the old Cup 'o Pizza place before they tore it down. Marie: Good pizza. (the two of them are eating pizza in a cup) Navin: Oh, this is the best pizza in a cup ever. This guy is unbelievable. He ran the old Cup 'o Pizza guy out of business. People come from all over to eat this.
(they exchange glances) Navin: You know, you have beautiful skin... posted by mds35 at 1:41 PM on November 3, 2006 [3 favorites]
Saw this at a mall back home. It looked fucking awful.
I second the potential Pepsi Blue! posted by defenestration at 1:46 PM on November 3, 2006
I second the potential Pepsi Blue!
I disagree, in this case. This product is so repellent that any mention of it is actually _negative_ advertising.
Or, more succinctly, eww. posted by gurple at 1:48 PM on November 3, 2006
Actually it seems that sportbucket is linking to various different pizza cone outfits. Unless they're all owned by the same company, this probably isn't just an ad. Hmm.
sportbucket... have you actually tried it? Was it edible?
The crust looked like rubber. posted by defenestration at 1:49 PM on November 3, 2006
mds35, that's what I immediately thought of too. posted by mr_crash_davis at 1:49 PM on November 3, 2006
Damn you rxrfrx. I will be singing that song all day long. Damn you. posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 1:50 PM on November 3, 2006 [1 favorite]
AND you slightly goofed the lyrics:
Pizza in the morning
Pizza at suppertime When pizza's on a bagel
You can eat pizza anytime! posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 1:51 PM on November 3, 2006 [1 favorite]
Also:
"You guys want some mini-pizzas? They're good. They're like mini-bagels, with pizza stuff on them. She'll put a little fontina cheese on. She has palsy, so she ends up putting a lot of cheese on." posted by mr_crash_davis at 1:55 PM on November 3, 2006
No, (un)fortunately this conical pizza trend hasn't hit the Pacific NW just yet, so I can't speak from experience. It looks terrible, though I'd be lying if I said I wouldn't try it.
As I discovered shortly after posting, some "food stylist" came up with the idea, and now people are jockeying to be the first to make it big here in the States. And yeah, I tried to link to a couple of different people doing the same thing -- the trend is interesting to me. The Pizzacono people don't seem to actually have anything to sell, they're just squatting on the name/idea. posted by sportbucket at 2:03 PM on November 3, 2006
ow, cone full of hot grease! posted by aubilenon at 2:04 PM on November 3, 2006
"...the first dramatically new way to consume pizza in recent memory"
Like calzone, but harder to eat. posted by Bugbread at 2:04 PM on November 3, 2006
Did anyone else look at this and think, "mmmm, temaki"? posted by msali at 2:16 PM on November 3, 2006
I've never seen such an innovative industry. Every week, you see a commercial for a new crust, and new twist, a new center, a new shape, etc. How many ways can you fix a pizza?
Maybe I can make my own invention. Pizza shakes, or a pizza glove. (You can eat eat and lick your fingers at the same time). posted by PetBoogaloo at 2:16 PM on November 3, 2006
"... The name “Pizzacono” accurately describes the product’s taste and characteristics."
Is it just me, or is there not a single photo of this creation on the first link's site? I guess I can imagine what it looks like, but I really need to see it. You'd think that a novel idea like that would warrant a picture on the site trying to sell potential investors and franchisees on the idea. Screw it, I'm opening a Smoothie King instead. posted by glycolized at 2:18 PM on November 3, 2006
It's totally worth it just for the long expository about how it will "revolutionize" an industry like the iPod did. That's awesome.
The fact that there are no pictures or anything to speak of makes me wonder if it's not an elaborate ruse. posted by The God Complex at 2:20 PM on November 3, 2006
If its so friggin' awesome then why don't they have some pictures so I can understand what the hell they mean?
I'll keep with my boring old Pizza 1.0 thanks. posted by fenriq at 2:21 PM on November 3, 2006
"... The name “Pizzacono” accurately describes the product’s taste and characteristics."
"Coño -- Literal meaning is 'vagina.'
So what you're saying is this product has a chance? ;) posted by The God Complex at 2:22 PM on November 3, 2006
you know what would revolutionize pizza? Put some general tso's chicken on it, cram a slice into a taco shell, then batter and deep fry the fucker. That would be revolutionary. posted by boo_radley at 2:24 PM on November 3, 2006
I'm holding out till there's a six-bladed model. posted by brundlefly at 2:28 PM on November 3, 2006
As I believe I've pointed out before, n and ñ are in fact two different letters. posted by Joakim Ziegler at 2:28 PM on November 3, 2006
Vagina pizza - mmmmmmm posted by sfts2 at 2:30 PM on November 3, 2006
Oh, and I thought that said 'COMICAL pizza.' posted by sfts2 at 2:31 PM on November 3, 2006
Call me when there's pizza in a hat. posted by davejay at 2:31 PM on November 3, 2006
The God Complex: If its so friggin' awesome then why don't they have some pictures so I can understand what the hell they mean?
fenriq: The fact that there are no pictures or anything to speak of makes me wonder if it's not an elaborate ruse.
Huh? There's a giant photo of it on the left side of the Konopizza page. Takes up half the height of the screen. posted by Bugbread at 2:33 PM on November 3, 2006
The Pizzacono people don't seem to actually have anything to sell, they're just squatting on the name/idea.
I could've sworn the place I saw was a Pizzacono. Hrmph.
I can't see this catching on. posted by defenestration at 2:33 PM on November 3, 2006
Joakim Ziegler: "As I believe I've pointed out before, n and ñ are in fact two different letters."
Yes, but we're talking about a language where "c" and "ch" are two different letters.
Disclaimer: My mom is Spanish, and Spanish is my first (but just barely) language. posted by Bugbread at 2:35 PM on November 3, 2006
At first I thought this was about a pizzacano, which is a concept I could have gotten behind, but this... I'm so disappointed. posted by ursus_comiter at 2:37 PM on November 3, 2006
The God Complex: If its so friggin' awesome then why don't they have some pictures so I can understand what the hell they mean?
fenriq: The fact that there are no pictures or anything to speak of makes me wonder if it's not an elaborate ruse.
You confused us, you knave!
I actually had checked out the second link yet. I thought it was more of the same--but it's not, it has a K!
(and they were better without the picture--eww) posted by The God Complex at 2:50 PM on November 3, 2006
My 14 /yo daugher can write HTML and I can't even add a link properly! posted by winks007 at 2:50 PM on November 3, 2006
Its people! posted by sfts2 at 2:54 PM on November 3, 2006
I'd hit it. posted by Anything at 2:58 PM on November 3, 2006
Oh, you could get this with anchovies and spin it in your hand. That might make it look like they were swimming down into cheesy black hole.
Beyond that I don't see much value. As others have said, I'll stick with my 2 dimensional pizza. posted by quin at 2:59 PM on November 3, 2006
My vagina pizza has a yeast infection. posted by BrotherCaine at 3:00 PM on November 3, 2006
Man, there are a lot of haters in here. I had one of these at the mall a few weeks back, and it was pretty good. The crust is not like traditional pizza crust; it's more of the biscuity, thicker variety. A large amount of cheese inside, but I like cheese. I thought I would end up with a mouth full of burning grease per aubilenon's comment, but it wasn't much different than a traditional pizza.
Although I can't say I see this catching on either, it was decent food. posted by Shecky at 3:00 PM on November 3, 2006
It's funny that they're trying to debut this in New York.
Also, who has a problem eating pizza with one hand? What kind of pizza are these people eating? posted by TheOnlyCoolTim at 3:01 PM on November 3, 2006
There's a South Indian dish of conical bread - it's huge, an upside down cone of unleavened bread, covered in sugar. Really sweet, but quite nice.
That's what I thought the PizzaCono (or whatever) looked like, but it seemed to look more like melted pizza ice cream. posted by divabat at 3:03 PM on November 3, 2006
They might be on to something. Does it also come in sugar cone or waffle?
Folded pizza is very big here in NYC, but nobody has yet sold prefolded pizza. I call dibs on that idea. And, I've got other big pizza ideas. Franchise opportunities available in the following (reply to the email in my profile):
Pizzacotto - Tiny pizzas to be plucked from a string
Pizzacotta - Pizza as flooring
Pizzacane - Pizza topped with dog meat posted by eatitlive at 3:03 PM on November 3, 2006
Make big $$$$$, and grows you like a real BIG man too. Girls love. posted by R. Mutt at 3:07 PM on November 3, 2006
It looks more like a segway than an ipod. posted by scheptech at 3:20 PM on November 3, 2006
These guys are fools. There's just two ways to improve pizza: stick it between some breasts or inside a vagina. CASE CLOSED posted by PeteNicely at 3:30 PM on November 3, 2006
As I believe I've pointed out before, n and ñ are in fact two different letters.
So if I called a product "Pizza Wagina," people aren't going to see the name and think "vadge"? posted by Mayor Curley at 3:33 PM on November 3, 2006 [1 favorite]
the original pizza a portafoglio was (and often still is) double-folded (into conical shape) and consumed one-handed. posted by progosk at 3:43 PM on November 3, 2006
Seems like they are pushing into the wrong market. This may work out as a product sold from stands at concerts, festivals, etc., where people require one hand to eat pizza with - and the other to properly hold a joint. posted by elwoodwiles at 3:53 PM on November 3, 2006
nobody has yet sold prefolded pizza. I call dibs on that idea.
Squagels, anyone? posted by davebush at 3:57 PM on November 3, 2006
As someone who speaks Spanish fluently and admittedly appreciates juvenile humor, I have to say that "cono" and "coño" are no more interchangeable than "as" and "ass".
As for pizzacono, it sounds like the incrEdibles of 2006. posted by O9scar at 4:01 PM on November 3, 2006
"So if I called a product "Pizza Wagina," people aren't going to see the name and think "vadge"?"
Yeah. And a "d" looks a lot like a "c" next to an "l". "cl = d". See? That's why we don't use expressions like "right click" or "double click", because everyone would see them and think "right dick" and "double dick". posted by Bugbread at 4:14 PM on November 3, 2006
Oh, but O9scar, my wife has a fantastic story about her time in Madrid when one of her fellow (non-native spanish speaking) exchange students repeatedly attempted to ask for a vagina at an ice cream shop.
"I'm sorry. We don't sell those."
"Yes you do. That girl over there has one!"
If this thing got sold in US High Schools, spanish class would never be the same.
Shit, it was actually "right c l i c k" all this time?
I think I owe my mom an apology. posted by cortex at 4:31 PM on November 3, 2006
You know, Dippin' Dots have been touted as the Ice Cream of the Future for around about 20 years now. This conical pizza industry is saying the same thing. You would think that the future would be here already. If it hasn't happened yet, then when I ask? WHEN?! posted by DonnieSticks at 4:39 PM on November 3, 2006
Pizza?! Now that's what I call a taco!! posted by The Deej at 4:41 PM on November 3, 2006 [1 favorite]
Pizza Mobius, the crust never ends. posted by The Power Nap at 4:48 PM on November 3, 2006
Kono Pizza is the original. I saw it in both Italy and Spain and tried it in Madrid for lunch one day.
Not good.
The cheese in mine was all up at the top, and then after I ate that, it was like three inches of sauce at the bottom which was too hot (temperature-wise) to eat. Not a very clever design, as you either were eating cheese, or sauce, but not both at once.
Plus the service at that place was possibly the worst in all of Madrid, and that is saying something. posted by anjamu at 4:51 PM on November 3, 2006
There's a Swedish street food (can't remember the name) that consists of a potato pancake cone, filled with up mashed potato and a couple of sausages, drizzled with mustard. One handed bangers and mash. Fucking sublime. posted by jack_mo at 5:39 PM on November 3, 2006
I took my first bite cleverly from the bottom of the cone, and gargled in delight as I sucked out the toppings in one foul swoop. The gargle turned to a gasp as the hot grease overpowered my esophagus, and the cheese welded to the now blistering walls in my throat. As I fell to the ground, gasping puss and cheddar, the pizza crust cone rolled nearby in a lopsided manner, a silent megaphone that would never voice my cry for help. posted by furtive at 6:01 PM on November 3, 2006 [7 favorites]
Lemme make sure I understand this...
Either: 1) the sauce and toppings are cool and the thing is nauseating, or 2) it's piping hot and as soon as you take a bite searing sauce flies all over the place, with second-degree burns and lawsuit sure to follow? Is that right?
Can't fail either way -- sign me up for six. posted by Opposite George at 6:09 PM on November 3, 2006
I'd hit it.
posted by Anything at 2:58 PM PST on November 3
[+]
You'd get some nasty burns if you tried. posted by kosher_jenny at 6:31 PM on November 3, 2006
Ughh, they come out with this while i'm still waiting for homer's nacho hat. posted by Kudos at 6:44 PM on November 3, 2006
Metafilter: gasping puss and cheddar posted by tgyg at 7:05 PM on November 3, 2006
These have been out in Europe for a while. They're apparently all the rage in Barcelona.
I'm pretty amped on the idea, to be honest. I bet they've got nothin on a pizza puff, though. posted by atomly at 7:49 PM on November 3, 2006
bugbread, I didn't check the second link. Just the first. But I did afterwards, its like a cheese cone with pizza flavoring. Not all that appealling to me. I like the flat kind of pizza. posted by fenriq at 10:44 PM on November 3, 2006
Their chances of success can't be that good when they can't even give their web pages names other than "Untitled Document. posted by JHarris at 11:33 PM on November 3, 2006
At first, reading the description, I thought they were talking about some sort of thing cone made purely of crust, in which to hold a rolled slice of pizza for more convenient carrying and eating. That actually sounded like it could be kind of cool, if overly doughy. But this just looks awful. I think the difference is that, with this, it looks like you'd run out of cheese really early, and that would just suck.
On the other hand, boo_radley's idea is pretty much completely awesome. posted by moss at 11:42 PM on November 3, 2006
I was going to post some snarky thing about how this seemed so American, but I see above that it's the damn Italians who are responsible for this abomination. Yuck. Food is about pleasure, and art, and care. Pizza is about excellent bread. posted by Nelson at 12:06 AM on November 4, 2006
We've had Kono Pizza in Auckland for at least a year - I had a couple - they were fairly tasty, but not fantastic. Of the two stores I knew about, one has definately closed, and I think the other one may have too.
In the mean time Dominos (which only launched in New Zealand about two years ago) has seriously eroded Pizza Hut's market share. posted by sycophant at 1:39 AM on November 4, 2006
In the mean time Dominos (which only launched in New Zealand about two years ago) has seriously eroded Pizza Hut's market share.
The battle for the bottom-of-the-barrel has come to the Kiwis, eh? Neither of those guys should be allowed to used the word "pizza" to describe their goods. posted by Thorzdad at 5:27 AM on November 4, 2006
a silent megaphone
You are killing me over here furtive. posted by Hicksu at 6:35 AM on November 4, 2006
Thorzdad: "Neither of those guys should be allowed to used the word "pizza" to describe their goods."
Keep in mind that there are big variances in quality across different regions. Dominos and Pizza Hut in Japan are quite good (and not just in comparison to the shitty pizza sold by competitors). I haven't had Dominos in New Zealand, but it may be entirely different from the Dominos in Muncie. posted by Bugbread at 7:19 AM on November 4, 2006
Dammit! My sister and I conjured up this idea when I was 8. Shoulda patented it. same with the Taco Cone. posted by DenOfSizer at 7:25 AM on November 4, 2006
After enough beer, I'd probably eat either...... posted by Sloben at 7:32 AM on November 4, 2006
If I remember the lyrics right, I think you both goofed them:
Pizza in the morning,
Pizza in the evening,
Pizza at suppertime.
When pizza's on a bagel
You can eat pizza anytime!
I know that doesn't entirely make sense, but I definitely remember the the "pizza [time of day]" section having three lines. posted by WCityMike at 7:59 AM on November 4, 2006
Taco town! posted by furtive at 8:21 AM on November 4, 2006
There's a Swedish street food (can't remember the name) that consists of a potato pancake cone, filled with up mashed potato and a couple of sausages, drizzled with mustard. One handed bangers and mash. Fucking sublime.
Well - the ultimate critics in the world are usually under 20 - I showed this to my daughter and she looked like she would throw-up. I can't get them to even eat calzone.
A few years back, the "powers that be" decided to dig up some perfectly good tree's on a downtown walk and erect metal sculptures that 'invoked' the feeling of tree's.
My daughter has consistently referred to them as 'the ugly trees'... posted by jkaczor at 10:38 AM on November 4, 2006
the feeling of tree's what?
Man, that's got to be just about the worst abuse of the apostrophe I've ever seen in the wild. If it's not standing in for an absent letter, it's possessive. Right?
And I didn't realize there were any trees in Calgary to begin with. I was there last week, and there sure was a lot of yellow grass. posted by Hildegarde at 6:01 PM on November 4, 2006
You know, that "pizza on a bagel" jingle totally ripped off the Kinks.
Tea in the morning,
tea in the evening,
tea at supper time,
You get tea when it's raining,
tea when it's snowing,
tea when the weather's fine.
-Have A Cuppa Tea
posted by spilon at 1:33 PM on November 3, 2006