Comments on: Walmart Shoplifing Complaint

Walmart Shoplifing Complaint

DougieZero1982 — Mon, 06 Nov 2006 14:48:23 -0800

my3cents.com is an addictive read. It's for people to air their grief about various retail stores (Walmart is the clear favorite). This particular complaint is a riot.

By: rough ashlar

rough ashlar — Mon, 06 Nov 2006 14:54:29 -0800

Alas, we do not know if he tossed the wrapper on the floor or threw it away in the trash. Without that, the story is ruined!

By: xmutex

xmutex — Mon, 06 Nov 2006 14:57:08 -0800

I really don't have sympathy for the dude who got busted shoplifting because he, well, shoplifted. Good on Wal Mart on that one.

By: ericost

ericost — Mon, 06 Nov 2006 15:03:55 -0800

There oughta be a law against shoplifting.

By: snofoam

snofoam — Mon, 06 Nov 2006 15:04:20 -0800

i think it's a woman, and michelle only shoplifted to show how stingy walmart is! plus, they don't even know what portobello mushrooms are! and they wouldn't even "revolk" her one year ban!

By: CRM114

CRM114 — Mon, 06 Nov 2006 15:04:34 -0800

She continues the defense of her shoplifting in the comments if you scroll down. That's good TV right there.

By: xmutex

xmutex — Mon, 06 Nov 2006 15:11:38 -0800

slim - like I said I am not one to steal, I only did it to prove a point, my son was arrested earlier for stealing pokemon cards and I wanted to show the world how they treat honest customers. Haha. Sorry, missed the boat on this one. Genius.

By: snofoam

snofoam — Mon, 06 Nov 2006 15:12:02 -0800

The comments are definitely the best part: ginnee: This is the best "humor" site I've found in ages!!! I love it! Michelle Connery: ginnie- Do you think what those idiotic nazi security guards did was funny, first they prey on a nine year old, next they will result to drowning infants because a teenagerd mother does not want their family to know they were pregnant. Touché! Michelle Connery: That is if they are offered more money for drowning infants. Double touché!

By: CRM114

CRM114 — Mon, 06 Nov 2006 15:13:11 -0800

Here's another gem.

By: mistermoore

mistermoore — Mon, 06 Nov 2006 15:17:07 -0800

It's hard for me to take seriously a complainer who styles himself "Always Right". His potential doctor was rude to him. Now he'd "like it noted to as many professionals as possible. I'd like it noted in publications, consumer reports, optometric and ophthalmologic organizations across the country. I want this man and his staff where he belongs. Out of business." What a whiner. Go to a different doctor.

By: I, Credulous

I, Credulous — Mon, 06 Nov 2006 15:18:49 -0800

it's the true hallmark of the interwebs that a semi-literate moron can place her comments in front of potentially millions of other people. all praise the interwebs! :) But do read her ridiculous defense of her actions in the comments...moronic comedy gold. that said, this site could prove useful, if you have the patience to sort through the noise and find real, common complaints re: particular services/suppliers/locations/etc. If you can't get through the noise, it's just a lot of kvetching. (now I'm off to contemplate lodging my complaint about CanadaPost, suffered just this afternoon!!)

By: snofoam

snofoam — Mon, 06 Nov 2006 15:27:16 -0800

the internets have written a sequel to confederacy of dunces.

By: Target Practice

Target Practice — Mon, 06 Nov 2006 15:37:49 -0800

Dear lord, there's a lot of stupid in that shoplifting thread. Theft is theft. If you're a starving transient on your last dime, then I might have some sympathy for you (albeit not for stealing a candy bar; try stealing bread or fruit or something), but not a presumably middle-class person who "just wanted to prove a point".

By: John Smallberries

John Smallberries — Mon, 06 Nov 2006 15:41:55 -0800

That Michelle Connery bit... that has to be a troll, right? Doesn't it? Please? /shudders at the thought of it being real...

By: Firas

Firas — Mon, 06 Nov 2006 15:47:56 -0800

Target Practice, stealing a candy bar is probably 10x easier than stealing bread.

By: quite unimportant

quite unimportant — Mon, 06 Nov 2006 15:57:37 -0800

Holy God. I could actually feel my forebrain convulse. Sometimes I forget that ditch diggers use the Internet too. May I never disparage Metafilter again. I may be an elitist, but at least I can write a coherent sentence.

By: lekvar

lekvar — Mon, 06 Nov 2006 16:14:32 -0800

People actually care enough about their fast food that they bother to complain about it? When they're clearly in the wrong? And smart as a bag of rocks? I'm astounded.

By: russilwvong

russilwvong — Mon, 06 Nov 2006 16:15:00 -0800

By: Simplicissimus

Simplicissimus — Mon, 06 Nov 2006 16:18:46 -0800

Bread and Circuses

By: Huplescat

Huplescat — Mon, 06 Nov 2006 16:19:24 -0800

First they went after the ditchdiggers, and I was silent. Then they came for the plumbers, and I didn't speak up. Next they went for the master woodworkers, and I kept my mouth shut. After that the elitists took out all the IT guys.... When they finally got around to me... wait a minute, they got around to me in the second sentence.

By: anjamu

anjamu — Mon, 06 Nov 2006 16:20:55 -0800

People actually care enough about their fast food that they bother to complain about it? When they're clearly in the wrong? And smart as a bag of rocks? I'm astounded.

Some people care enough to call 911.

By: Serial Killer Slumber Party

Serial Killer Slumber Party — Mon, 06 Nov 2006 16:32:12 -0800

I was using this community weblog Metafilter, usually I use much better commnity weblogs but I was in a hurry so I just had to use Metafilter. ANYWAY they were totally rude and I was being nice AND THEN I GOT A PISSING ELEPHANT. So I post a link to my own website saying how stupid they are to make a point how stupid they are and then they BANNED ME! And then I didn't get my five bucks back! I'm telling all my family and friends not to use Metafilter and I might go to the press because they don't know how to treat their customers!

By: clevershark

clevershark — Mon, 06 Nov 2006 16:32:48 -0800

russilwvong writes "More from Michelle Connery." It's hilarious how that story is titled "Security arrests innocent nine year old and treats him like a criminal.", but starts off plainly stating that he stole something from the store.

By: UbuRoivas

UbuRoivas — Mon, 06 Nov 2006 17:05:32 -0800

The education of sales staff is obviously improving in Amerika: Your search - portobello - did not match any documents.

By: winston

winston — Mon, 06 Nov 2006 17:10:59 -0800

It's hilarious how that story is titled "Security arrests innocent nine year old and treats him like a criminal.", but starts off plainly stating that he stole something from the store. On two separate occasions.

By: found missing

found missing — Mon, 06 Nov 2006 17:21:48 -0800

I call bullshit on candybar lady and her candybar story.

By: rob511

rob511 — Mon, 06 Nov 2006 17:34:12 -0800

Ceiling CCT is watching you misappropriate.

By: clevershark

clevershark — Mon, 06 Nov 2006 17:38:30 -0800

winston opines "On two separate occasions." And then she went back to the same store to steal, but just in order to have herself arrested to prove a point. And she wants to be un-banned from the store. And she wants the store to give her a gift certificate to tempt her to shop there again. "Michelle Connery" is a dingbat.

By: rough ashlar

rough ashlar — Mon, 06 Nov 2006 17:40:00 -0800

Ceiling CCT is watching you misappropriate. posted by rob511 at 5:34 PM PST How do you get that installed in the halls of Congress?

By: Ziggy Zaga

Ziggy Zaga — Mon, 06 Nov 2006 17:47:14 -0800

there are sites like this all over the internet; rip-off report is another prominent one. unfortunately most of these sites are all populated with stories by the most ignorant, illiterate and/or gullible people imaginable. so many people think they're entitled to anything, and when a business does not share that line of thinking, they get on sites like these and share their sob stories about how they couldn't return broken merchandise three years after the fact, or how they deserve to get merchandise at 99% off market value because someone put a hundred-dollar item in a spot typically reserved for 99-cent bleach. i used to think sites like these were amusing, but after a lengthy stint in retail, these stories just make me depressed.

By: Firas

Firas — Mon, 06 Nov 2006 17:50:09 -0800

I call bullshit on candybar lady and her candybar story. Seconded. I saw a Colbert thing where he pointed out that Walmart had changed their internal policies to stop calling in the cops for shoplifting attempts on items worth less than $20 (it was previously $5). She says, 'it was a matter over 68 cents and i have a criminal record over 68 cents'. Criminal record over 68 cents? You have to go to great lengths to get that I'd say.

By: Firas

Firas — Mon, 06 Nov 2006 17:53:03 -0800

I gotta say, poor kid for having a complete non-parent! How does she deal with his teachers when they call with disciplinary issues?

By: Ziggy Zaga

Ziggy Zaga — Mon, 06 Nov 2006 18:02:23 -0800

firas: Criminal record over 68 cents? You have to go to great lengths to get that I'd say. not necessarily.

By: Firas

Firas — Mon, 06 Nov 2006 18:07:53 -0800

Ziggy Zaga, that doesn't seem to have resulted in a criminal record (ie. with the gov't).

By: carsonb

carsonb — Mon, 06 Nov 2006 18:09:12 -0800

I looked up the company I work for, and the only complaint was about pornography. it's amazing the lengths some people will go to covering up porn. I used to find our bargain section completely reorganized---with tame 'great sex!' titles hidden, art books rearranged so their covers weren't visible, and other shit they didn't like fed into crevices and crammed under displays---by customers! some people wanted offensive titles put on the bottom shelf so they didn't have to see them at eye-level, and others wanted them on the top shelf so their kids didn't get an eyeful of what? oh, just the word 'sex.' and as these doting parents are carefully destroying the order in one area, their little angels are tearing the plastic wrap off Penthouse a few sections over and taking them en masse to the bathrooms to wank on and giggle over. get a brain, morans. yeah, so I just got home from a long day of retail...

By: redsparkler

redsparkler — Mon, 06 Nov 2006 18:45:07 -0800

Ha ha, I looked up the company you worked for, too. I thought complaints would be more juicy than that.

By: jason's_planet

jason's_planet — Mon, 06 Nov 2006 19:10:07 -0800

Oh, gawd. Another venue for spoiled, entitled consumer princes and princesses to harass minimum-wage retail workers. Reading that site reminded me of the Dog Poop Girl incident over in Korea.

By: fenriq

fenriq — Mon, 06 Nov 2006 19:22:36 -0800

I am the last one to defend Wal-Mart but this woman is a thief, plain and simple. There's really no defense for consuming something that you haven't paid for. And there is no sliding scale for petty theft, you either stole it and are a criminal, or you did not and are not. But I am totally writing some complaints against my former company, just not from my home or work computer.

By: emjaybee

emjaybee — Mon, 06 Nov 2006 19:26:55 -0800

carsonb, me too ! Though I worked for them long ago. I was so glad to be female and thus not obligated to pick up the wanked-on mags in the men's room. Here's my favorite review of another bookstore: If their attitudes and customer service are any indication, a more appropriate name for them would be Satan's Supply!!

By: bpm140

bpm140 — Mon, 06 Nov 2006 19:59:57 -0800

Of course, we shouldn't feel too superior: we have our own shoplifting community. Never underestimate people's ability to rationalize their actions. See also.

By: klangklangston

klangklangston — Mon, 06 Nov 2006 20:06:21 -0800

Gawd, that Wal-mart candybar woman deserves the Akbar jpeg.

By: Pinback

Pinback — Mon, 06 Nov 2006 20:25:14 -0800

quite unimportant, you may be an elitist, but I hope that genuinely was sarcasm. Most ditch diggers (or insert other favoured lower-class blue collar workers as appropriate) I've had the pleasure of working with have the opposite problem - an excess of humility and a too-overdeveloped sense of right and wrong for their own good. The worst offenders I've encountered in the "I'm the customer, I'm always right, and I'm entitled to whatever I want!" stakes are generally from the comfortable suburban middle class. There's just no pleasing some of them, even when you bend heaven and earth to acquiesce to their inflated sense of self-entitlement. You exist to serve, so serve them you damn well will! Every time I read these sorts of posts, I really hope the highlighted examples are trolls - because the alternative is just too frightening and depressing. Unfortunately, I know from experience they're not...

By: loquacious

loquacious — Mon, 06 Nov 2006 20:27:19 -0800

MetaFilter: Bullshit candybar.

By: luckypozzo

luckypozzo — Mon, 06 Nov 2006 20:48:20 -0800

We need a ban on Teenage Sex in Ohio!

By: dreamsign

dreamsign — Mon, 06 Nov 2006 21:03:45 -0800

Did you find this review helpful? Very Helpful -- A Little Helpful When did this review stop beating its wife?

By: clevershark

clevershark — Mon, 06 Nov 2006 21:24:40 -0800

Indeed, two more options are needed -- "not helpful" and "a complete bloody waste of time". Perhaps they could also add a "the reviewer is a complete nutter" option. I wonder if you can use the web site to write a review about the same web site... that would be so meta...

By: bangalla

bangalla — Mon, 06 Nov 2006 22:37:19 -0800

I work as an IT repair person. Thankfully I no longer have to deal with consumer equipment because it was an utterly soul destroying experience. The entitlement mentality that seems to be so prevalent these days is frightening, as is the stupidity that so often seems to accompany it. My worst experience, which naturally led to a complaint to my boss, was the woman who insisted that I put back all the photos she had on her computer; the photos which had been on the hard disk that had just failed and hadn't been backed up. Naturally I was the biggest prick in the world because I refused to make the photos reappear. No amount of explanation would placate her, she was convinced that I was simply being heartless.

By: fenriq

fenriq — Mon, 06 Nov 2006 22:57:13 -0800

Can someone explain the 3 cents bit? I've been trying to figure out what the hell the deal is with the name of the site. Like 2 cents but a little more?

By: Bugbread

Bugbread — Mon, 06 Nov 2006 23:39:40 -0800

awspie (07/06/2006) sljj2k using company time and equipment ot play on my3cents is company worst nite mare. why you not condone zork awspie (07/06/2006) i mint condamn Best spelling correction ever.

By: I, Credulous

I, Credulous — Mon, 06 Nov 2006 23:41:23 -0800

Pinback, I feel for you: I toiled in various retail jobs for all of my 20s and early 30s, and gave me this insight: People may not like the word "slavery" anymore, but they sure do like to have themselves some slaves. Even if only for the duration of their visit to a store.

By: Bugbread

Bugbread — Mon, 06 Nov 2006 23:45:56 -0800

I MEAN A 2.00 ICE TEA AND 2.00 FOR A RINKY DINKY LIL CUP OF SODA FOR 2 YOUNG BOYS.......GIMME A BREAK!!! WHAT A RIP OFF!!!!! WELL I WILL RETURN WITH KIDS AT MY SIDE AND PERHAPS A FEW MORE KIDS TO DRINK ALL THEIR SODA AND NOTHING ELSE! BOTTOMLESS GLASSES, OF SODA + BOYS = GAS AND PLENTY OF LAUGHS..... REVENGE IS SWEET!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I GUESS I WILL HAVE TO TAPE THIS ONE........... HE HE HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE WHY GET MAD, GET EVEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Oh, yeah, that'll be fun to watch. "Local man takes revenge on pizza shop charging $2 for soda by bringing a small squad of children to drink $1.50 of soda each, going home, farting, and complaining about stomachaches".

By: Joeforking

Joeforking — Mon, 06 Nov 2006 23:52:43 -0800

What's the betting that Michelle Connery is a fat Christian?

By: Pollomacho

Pollomacho — Tue, 07 Nov 2006 01:07:11 -0800

The PirateWithParrot character from the comments (and yes, I mean all the comments) is a serious douchebag!

By: Pinback

Pinback — Tue, 07 Nov 2006 04:51:38 -0800

Don't get me wrong, I, Credulous - I haven't had the pleasure of working retail (and God willing, I won't). I've just been fairly lucky in that I've had jobs in which I've worked for, with, and alongside all sorts of people - from the ditchdiggers right up to the CEOs. And I learnt that neither of those two extremes are the worst when it comes to having a monstrous sense of entitlement. The ones most likely to act this way have 3.2 kids, a mortgage, and drive a late model SUV or "family" car. The ones that just don't understand - well, you can at least try to explain things to them, and live in hope that when they get home and calm down some of it will sink in and they'll realise just how unreasonable they were. But, for every one of those, there's another who ... well, I really don't understand how anyone could grow up and develop a functional adult life with their apparent attitude, so I prefer not to dwell on it. Particularly not on the bits where they find a mate, breed, and produce more hellspawn... (Hint: if you come up to me after I've been working 22 hours straight trying to keep things working through floods and power failures, and demand that I help carry your shopping to your car because I'm a 'public servant' - well, I'm going to think you're a prick whatever your station in life ;-)

By: jacalata

jacalata — Tue, 07 Nov 2006 06:12:56 -0800

bugbread, I get the impression that they do 'bottomless soda' for kids - so $1.50 each for all the soda they can drink, and then they can burp and be sick in the store.

By: I, Credulous

I, Credulous — Tue, 07 Nov 2006 06:56:03 -0800

"...well, you can at least try to explain things to them, and live in hope that when they get home and calm down some of it will sink in and they'll realise just how unreasonable they were." Amen to that.

By: KevinKarl

KevinKarl — Tue, 07 Nov 2006 07:25:33 -0800

When I worked in retail, we had the 10 Retail Commandments. Number 1: The customer is seldom right.

By: Fezboy!

Fezboy! — Tue, 07 Nov 2006 07:39:46 -0800

Michelle was an obvious troll. I'm fairly certain pizza boy was trolling too. Then again, if I'm wrong, my deepest fears are being confirmed... I'm too frightened to continue reading that site.

By: etoile

etoile — Tue, 07 Nov 2006 08:36:43 -0800

bugbread, I think he was going to have the kids burp themselves silly in the restaurant. Because lord knows that's gonna teach Pizzeria Uno not to charge people for their drinks! (urk...)

By: imperium

imperium — Tue, 07 Nov 2006 08:42:16 -0800

If she's scared, I'm double-scared. Scroll down to find what must surely be the same Michelle Connery's role. Here's a clue: Iraq.

By: thekilgore

thekilgore — Tue, 07 Nov 2006 08:59:23 -0800

"The mayo and mustard and whatever else ejaculated all over the place made the whole sandwich fall apart; discusting." Probably one of the best things I have ever read on the internet.

By: Uther Bentrazor

Uther Bentrazor — Tue, 07 Nov 2006 10:03:56 -0800

"i used to think sites like these were amusing, but after a lengthy stint in retail, these stories just make me depressed." Same. I'll even add that while it's amusingly trollish, I've personally dealt with people with just as warped a sense of logic and personal infalliability (if not worse) than the candy bar lady.

By: mkultra

mkultra — Tue, 07 Nov 2006 11:18:50 -0800

By: ddf

ddf — Tue, 07 Nov 2006 11:30:27 -0800

Oh man, reading that comment thread on the candybar complaint was hard. I felt like my mind was imploding ... or something. I can't even begin to explain the revulsion.

By: longsleeves

longsleeves — Tue, 07 Nov 2006 14:33:27 -0800

Every time I go, I et hit on by homosexual deviants!

By: longsleeves

longsleeves — Tue, 07 Nov 2006 14:34:06 -0800

(g)

By: Bugbread

Bugbread — Tue, 07 Nov 2006 16:23:16 -0800

I hadn't considered burping when he mentioned kids with gas. (And the $1.50 comment was in regards to him believing that he could somehow stick it to the Man financially, by just having kids order bottomless $2 sodas, not realizing that syrup and carbonated water are so cheap that, even if you didn't order pizza, but just cup after cup of soda, you could probably only drink about $1.50 of syrup and water before they'd have to bring in an ambulance, meaning they'd still make a 50 cent profit off you).