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November 9, 2006 9:09 AM

"Is this annoying? Is this annoying? Is this annoying?" 248 ways to annoy people. via digg
posted by four panels (71 comments total)

That list is actually a variant of one written in 1995 by Alan Meiss. Here's a mirror of the original site. Meiss also wrote the "50 Fun Things" lists that make the rounds.

This is the original Annoying list.
posted by truex at 9:15 AM on November 9, 2006 [1 favorite]

Deletion reason: Yes. It is.
posted by loquacious at 9:16 AM on November 9, 2006

I'd enjoy a MetaFilter version of this list.
posted by dead_ at 9:17 AM on November 9, 2006

This must be an updated version of a much older list.

178. Stand on a busy corner. Gasp, look and point up. See how many people look.

I've done this.
posted by quin at 9:19 AM on November 9, 2006

that's what you think.
posted by hal9k at 9:19 AM on November 9, 2006

249. Forego any attempt at introspection.
posted by hydrophonic at 9:24 AM on November 9, 2006

250. ^
posted by dead_ at 9:24 AM on November 9, 2006 [1 favorite]

251. Convince yourself that your lack of popularity is the fault of others.
posted by hydrophonic at 9:26 AM on November 9, 2006

251. rxrfrx
posted by rxrfrx at 9:26 AM on November 9, 2006

251. Fail to use preview.
posted by loquacious at 9:34 AM on November 9, 2006

Well... I tell you what totally annoys me, is smokers throwing cigarette butts out their car windows. I'm not trying to dismiss smoker rights, but that is littering.
posted by PetBoogaloo at 9:37 AM on November 9, 2006

Well... I tell you what totally annoys me, is throwing cigarette smokers butts out their car windows. I'm not trying to dismiss littering rights, but that is smokin'.
posted by Floydd at 9:41 AM on November 9, 2006

39. Mow your lawn with scissors.

Er... well I guess that would be a good way to annoy myself.
posted by Stauf at 9:45 AM on November 9, 2006

178. Stand on a busy corner. Gasp, look and point up. See how many people look.
Rather more amusing version of this is to starting crossing the street when cars are speeding by and it's clearly dangerous. Then step back on to the sidewalk. A goodly number of the crowd waiting to cross will also start crossing. If you get the timing right a tragedy will occur. It takes a little practice, but the best thing is it's legal.
posted by econous at 9:45 AM on November 9, 2006 [3 favorites]

252. Have a bigger cock than those around you.
253. Let them know it.
posted by econous at 9:47 AM on November 9, 2006

254. If you live in Toronto, stand at the corner of Bloor & Bathurst and ask pedestrians how to get to Honest Ed's.

255. Tell very localized jokes to outsiders.
posted by Evstar at 9:48 AM on November 9, 2006

256. Disable the img tag.
posted by Evstar at 9:51 AM on November 9, 2006

256. Jump, yell, and say "EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE" over and over and over! HA HA HA! This so deserves a FPP! Best of the web!
posted by StarForce5 at 9:51 AM on November 9, 2006

17. Tape pieces of "Sweating to the Oldies" over climatic parts of rental movies.
The parts with weather in them? What would that do?
posted by Floydd at 9:57 AM on November 9, 2006

Truly the best of the web.
posted by RokkitNite at 9:58 AM on November 9, 2006

257. Film a Mac advertisement.
posted by Skot at 9:58 AM on November 9, 2006

118. Insist completely ridiculous things are true - like Bush is still President.
Now that's annoying.
posted by Floydd at 10:02 AM on November 9, 2006

258. Snark incessantly.
posted by Floydd at 10:03 AM on November 9, 2006

No way. We love snarking.
posted by dead_ at 10:06 AM on November 9, 2006

266. Feign being board by things you actually find cool or funny
posted by DieHipsterDie at 10:13 AM on November 9, 2006

267. Post a link to Metafilter about how another website has run out of comments.
posted by dydecker at 10:17 AM on November 9, 2006

268. Correct the homonymistic mis-spelling of someone claiming to be a purveyor of anything cool, or funny.
posted by loquacious at 10:19 AM on November 9, 2006

375. Invade foreign country looking for nonexistant weapons. Kill tons of people. Stand around the piles dead and go "Wow, wha happen?"
posted by CynicalKnight at 10:24 AM on November 9, 2006

3,789: Eat microwaved corn dogs. With spicy deli mustard.

Wait, that's from the "Things that are delicious" list, not the "Things that are annoying".
posted by loquacious at 10:27 AM on November 9, 2006 [1 favorite]

I think. I'm not sure. *waves corndog around * IS THIS ANNOYING?
posted by loquacious at 10:28 AM on November 9, 2006

Rather more amusing version of this is to starting crossing the street when cars are speeding by and it's clearly dangerous.

Recently I've started taking the attitude of "I'll walk out into the road in front of oncoming traffic (especially SUVs) and the car will slow down. If it doesn't, then I guess there'll be pain and a law suit". So far, so good - no law suits or broken bones.
posted by TheDonF at 10:30 AM on November 9, 2006

287934298. retarded fucking shitty post please die
posted by cellphone at 10:40 AM on November 9, 2006

My girlfriend has a similar attitude toward driving, TheDonF.

"I figure I can turn whenever I want (so long as they can see her well in advance, of course), since it's not as if the other people want to damage their car."

I could argue how it's not a...socially minded means of thinking, but it does the trick.
posted by owenkun at 10:42 AM on November 9, 2006

owenkun: I remember a reader's letter in Viz years ago along the same lines. Something like "I don't use indicators - it's none of anyone else's business where I'm going".

Also, not adding tags to a post. That's annoying.
posted by TheDonF at 10:48 AM on November 9, 2006

269. Sign all your posts with your screen name and a duckie face.

--Citizen Premier o<
posted by Citizen Premier at 10:53 AM on November 9, 2006

270. Perform emotional, dramatic recitations of old novelty song lyrics. "You put the lime... in the coconut! And drink... them both... TOGETHER!"
posted by Faint of Butt at 11:18 AM on November 9, 2006 [1 favorite]

I'm annoying my neighbors right now! I'm not raking up my leaves and throwing them in the trash the way God intended.

One year our neighbor across the street earnestly confided to my husband his fear that some morning Mrs. Neighbor would get into her car, start 'er up and burst into flames when the leaves under her car ignited.

I'm thinking these napalm-infused leaves are more trouble than they are worth.
posted by Secret Life of Gravy at 11:23 AM on November 9, 2006

38. Sing along at the opera.

A couple sitting behind me did that once. They took the subtitles as an indication that it was a singalong.
posted by MrMoonPie at 11:36 AM on November 9, 2006

Well I see you've managed to meta 232
posted by edgeways at 11:36 AM on November 9, 2006

I could swear that I've seen Jim Carey do absolutely everything on that list.
posted by Jon-o at 11:44 AM on November 9, 2006

I am a big fan of #132. Go on, look it up. I'll wait.
posted by sdrawkcab at 11:51 AM on November 9, 2006

While reading this list, I kept picturing Dwight from the American version of The Office doing each and every one of these actions.

Somehow, I think it was fitting.


Of course, then there were the ones like "Finish every sentence with 'By the will of the Gods'" or something else silly or random. My ex-roommate used to do that. In fact, I think he did it on purpose.
posted by daq at 12:13 PM on November 9, 2006

Wow. Now I don't even have to check my e-mail for annoying forwards. I can get them just by visiting MeFi. YAY!!!
posted by brina at 12:27 PM on November 9, 2006

271. Use sarcasm to express your opinion of the quality of a post on a freaking community weblog. End all your comments with "YAY!!!"
posted by yhbc at 12:38 PM on November 9, 2006

272. ^
273. Repeat someone else's list item.
posted by eyeballkid at 12:55 PM on November 9, 2006 [1 favorite]

When I was six or seven years younger, I used to buy a lot of joke books. I stopped once I realised I was buying the same book in different orders.

Funny, how this reminded me of that.
posted by Serial Killer Slumber Party at 1:29 PM on November 9, 2006

290. Any form of "This thing... It vibrates?"
posted by DieHipsterDie at 1:31 PM on November 9, 2006

Well, yes, they're old, but upon re-reading them, I laughed until I cried at work today. Many years ago I knew somebody a bit off-balance who would call people at 3 A.M. and demand furiously "Do you have ANY idea what time it is?!", then hang up. Also, I still enjoy setting the alarm clocks at department stores to go off at variable intervals.
posted by fish tick at 1:42 PM on November 9, 2006

.ees I .dnimreveN .ho ...backwards ,hcum os 231# ekil uoy fI
posted by rw at 2:03 PM on November 9, 2006

I am a big fan of #132. Go on, look it up. I'll wait.
posted by sdrawkcab at 11:51 AM PST on November 9


.gnitiaw llits era uoy taht kniht ot etaH
?yad ruoy s'woh ,oS
posted by Cranberry at 2:18 PM on November 9, 2006

Hey, rw. How about we call each other at 3AM?
posted by Cranberry at 2:19 PM on November 9, 2006

273. Repeat someone else's list item.
posted by eyeballkid at 2:55 PM CST on November 9


If you insist.
posted by item at 2:33 PM on November 9, 2006

291. Use of the term: Unique snowflake.
292. Use of the term: Smallest violin.
posted by econous at 2:45 PM on November 9, 2006

e^iπ-1 : write annoying mathematical comments.
posted by lalochezia at 3:32 PM on November 9, 2006

Personal favorite? The time I was interning for the State Department in Germany and sat in our econ officer's office singing...

"Na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na BATMAN!"

...over and over and over again. For like, 30 minutes. (S'ok, he totally deserved it. Trust me).
posted by bitter-girl.com at 3:36 PM on November 9, 2006

293. Post self-referential comments. In accordance with prophecy.
294 through 978. - run up the numbers pointlessly.
posted by Smedleyman at 3:47 PM on November 9, 2006

295. Piss on a persons back.
296. Tell then its raining.
posted by econous at 4:07 PM on November 9, 2006

I started by listing all of the items that our fifteen year old actually hits us with on a daily basis, but I got depressed when I hit 100 and had already racked up 12, so I stopped. Annoying people suck. I would forward this list to my teenager, but I think it would only give him ideas. Beep while fat people back up? He'd love that. What an ass.
posted by msali at 4:52 PM on November 9, 2006

Cranberry, 3 a.m. works for me only if I can call you collect, preferably using an automated system with a canned message.

Is that even possible?

That would be very irritating, indeed.
posted by rw at 4:57 PM on November 9, 2006

296. Tell them its raining.
posted by econous at 4:59 PM on November 9, 2006

Throwing your feces - pretty annoying.
posted by Smedleyman at 5:27 PM on November 9, 2006

297.
posted by madamjujujive at 6:04 PM on November 9, 2006

Okay madam, that is pretty fucking annoying.
posted by yhbc at 6:42 PM on November 9, 2006

273. List your item under a number someone else has already used, thereby erasing the previous one.

274. Repeat someone else's list item.
posted by Stauf at 7:04 PM on November 9, 2006

276. Fail to choke on a pretzel.
posted by HyperBlue at 7:27 PM on November 9, 2006

Point out humour in someone being pedantic with made-up words like "homonymistic". For added annoyance, reference popular Van Morrison song.
posted by dreamsign at 7:46 PM on November 9, 2006

This thread should probably mention the mostly forgotten gem, "How To Irritate People", featuring John Cleese, Michael Palin and Graham Chapman etc. It's a pre-Monty Python mockumentary from 1968 (Wikipedia, iMDB). It's available at least as an R2 PAL DVD.
posted by lifeless at 12:03 AM on November 10, 2006

# 74 - Why is wearing your pants backwards annoying?
posted by MuffinMan at 8:44 AM on November 10, 2006

Because it makes it really inconvenient to pee.
posted by Floydd at 9:23 AM on November 10, 2006

n + 1: going into every thread and finding a way to use the phrase 'best of the web'
posted by troybob at 10:22 AM on November 10, 2006

278. Simpsons references, that's a paddlin'

279. reposting late in the thread.
posted by Smedleyman at 8:38 PM on November 11, 2006