Poop-Freeze

November 17, 2006 8:24 PM

Poop-Freeze™ is a specially formulated aerosol freeze spray that, upon contact, forms a frosty film on dog poop (or cat poop) to harden the surface for easy pick-up.
posted by mr_crash_davis (45 comments total)

And I betcha it cleans out your keyboard, too.

It's a floor wax AND a dessert topping!
posted by yhbc at 8:28 PM on November 17, 2006

Some like it hot.
posted by maryh at 8:31 PM on November 17, 2006 [1 favorite]

Making one of nature's most biodegradable products into something that occupies landfill space much longer, all for the convenience of humans who dislike the texture of their own animal's waste products? This sounds like a fantastic idea! Even if it's just frozen water, the can itself and the aerosol can't be that great for the environment.

If you can't handle a little poop, don't own a dog. And don't have a kid. Speaking of which, I see a spinoff product opportunity. "Diaper-Freeze" (tm) is a specially formulated spray that, upon contact, forms a frosty film on your child's anus to eliminate the odor and wetness associated with those disgusting excretory functions! Wow! It's like having your very own automaton that looks just like you without any of the inconvenience of being responsible for a living thing!
posted by InnocentBystander at 8:32 PM on November 17, 2006

Because it's MY dootie!
posted by meh at 8:32 PM on November 17, 2006

Umm...wasn't this the major plot element of a Jack Black movie?
posted by Kickstart70 at 8:33 PM on November 17, 2006

Feh. This shit doesn't make poo disappear.
posted by carsonb at 8:33 PM on November 17, 2006

Somebody's gonna huff it.
posted by owhydididoit at 8:34 PM on November 17, 2006

dammit! jinx.
posted by carsonb at 8:34 PM on November 17, 2006

*with gusto*

I'm gone huff me some dootie spray!
posted by meh at 8:36 PM on November 17, 2006 [2 favorites]

Making one of nature's most biodegradable products into something that occupies landfill space much longer, all for the convenience of humans who dislike the texture of their own animal's waste products?

Umm right. Until it thaws. About five minute later.
posted by IronLizard at 8:51 PM on November 17, 2006

By THE WAY. This is the same thing they use to freeze warts off these days.
posted by IronLizard at 8:52 PM on November 17, 2006

Oh, and quick freeze biological samples.
posted by IronLizard at 8:53 PM on November 17, 2006

Link
posted by IronLizard at 8:54 PM on November 17, 2006

Or you could just shove a cork in your dog's butt and it won't shit for a really long time. And when it does, make sure it "accidentally" wanders over to your jerky neighbor's yard before letting loose!
posted by fenriq at 9:01 PM on November 17, 2006

Specially formulated? Or is it just more highly compressed so that it's colder when you spray it?
Somebody take some on a plane so we can find out.
posted by uosuaq at 9:17 PM on November 17, 2006

I ain't drinking that water....
posted by forallmankind at 9:51 PM on November 17, 2006

All the freezing sprays I'm familiar with were made back in the late 70s, early 80s. Ozone depletion in a can.
posted by five fresh fish at 9:53 PM on November 17, 2006

Shit Blue^TM
posted by exlotuseater at 10:26 PM on November 17, 2006

Wasn't this, like all great inventions, first in Mad Magazine?
posted by YoBananaBoy at 11:01 PM on November 17, 2006

Personally, I'm looking forward to the day when technology means I don't have to do anything. At all. Ever. Including owning, being aware of, and being able to spell technology.
posted by poweredbybeard at 11:05 PM on November 17, 2006

Obligitory IMDB link.
posted by Rhomboid at 11:34 PM on November 17, 2006

"Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic." How true of the great poop-freeze! How true!
posted by TweetleBeetleBattleBookie at 11:53 PM on November 17, 2006

No no no. Pepsi Poo.
posted by luftmensch at 12:00 AM on November 18, 2006

It's ordinary freezer spray. You can get it at any electronics store. Freezing (or just frost-crusting) large/warm/numerous things with it will empty the expensive can pretty darn fast.

Of course, it's just a novelty rebadge product, like when people put cotton balls in a bag and label them "ghost poop".

Freezer spray actually is useful for various jobs, though. Some of them non-silly.
posted by dansdata at 12:01 AM on November 18, 2006

Well, it's better than my idea for dealing with dog poo:

An aerosol that boils it.
posted by Astro Zombie at 12:36 AM on November 18, 2006

This is the same thing they use to freeze warts off these days.^

It's also probably the same as circuit chiller; used to test for heat failure in electronic components. Who labels these cans? They're making a mint.
posted by evil holiday magic at 1:11 AM on November 18, 2006

It seems that Mad Magazine's Al Jaffee^Wiki had a similar idea back in 1978.
posted by Zack_Replica at 1:21 AM on November 18, 2006

hmm. Should've read the thread closer, as YoBananaBoy beat me to it. Well, 'cept for the links.
posted by Zack_Replica at 1:23 AM on November 18, 2006

I find it hard to believe that people would voluntarily forgo the pleasure of a warm steaming poo in a cold hand on a wintry day.
posted by srboisvert at 1:58 AM on November 18, 2006

I'm gone huff me some dootie spray!

Huff it? I'm gonna cook it up and shoot it!
posted by PeterMcDermott at 2:27 AM on November 18, 2006

Zack_Replica: "It seems that Mad Magazine's Al Jaffee^Wiki had a similar idea back in 1978."

You sure that's a similar idea? Because it looks to me like a design for some weird ass dildo.

And the style choices of the guy that's using it reinforces my suspicions.
posted by PeterMcDermott at 2:31 AM on November 18, 2006

You mean a very weird dildo, or a dildo for inserting in the ass?

Actually, don't answer that. I don't think I want to know.
posted by ArkhanJG at 2:53 AM on November 18, 2006

Pepsi Poo.

No, Poopsie Blue. Come on, the shit writes itself.
posted by mediareport at 6:39 AM on November 18, 2006 [1 favorite]

I can't help but snort-laugh whenever I see someone pick up dog crap. This will add to the humor.
posted by recurve at 7:31 AM on November 18, 2006

This instant-freeze spray seems like something that Heston Blumenthal would just love to use in his cooking.
posted by Flashman at 7:59 AM on November 18, 2006

Now where's muh ding donged dootie pipe?
posted by meh at 8:11 AM on November 18, 2006

The media page is disappointingly blank
posted by lemonfridge at 8:19 AM on November 18, 2006

I'm gone huff me some dootie spray!

This thread was worth is just for that line.
posted by fenriq at 9:48 AM on November 18, 2006

Thank god images are turned off on mefi.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 10:28 AM on November 18, 2006

Hey, I'm only pointing out that the ideas are similar, and it's not my fault that Mr Jaffee is illustrating what could possibly be a multi-use err.. tool.

People picking up dog grumpies:
The only thing sadder than the Sandwich People, are the *Poo* People. You know, the Poo People: adults who sleep alone every night, but everyday you see 'em walkin' their three pound dogs. If it were a fish you'd throw it back! But they love it and they walk it. They walk it with little plastic bags on their hands. Waitin' for their little three-pounder to have his poo. And when he does, they pick it up. And feel that heat in their hand. As if to say: "I am *alive*!!" - Bruce McCulloch
posted by Zack_Replica at 1:50 PM on November 18, 2006

While I do not have a dog and therefore have no use for its stated purpose, I do think that product has the potential to save me a fortune on Viagra.
posted by flarbuse at 4:36 PM on November 18, 2006

For the ultimate in pooper-scooping, get yourself a Bagger 288. No sissy spray cans needed. Suitable for very large dogs.
posted by Quietgal at 9:30 PM on November 18, 2006

flarbuse: Thanks. Please, that desperately needs to be illustrated. I think the last panel should show him accidently bumping it against something.
posted by Goofyy at 9:37 PM on November 18, 2006

Wow. I might be dislexic. I thought the thing said "Your's a douche."
posted by portisfreak at 11:21 AM on November 19, 2006

I'm thinking that a leaf-blower might work better.
posted by mrhappysad at 7:39 AM on November 21, 2006