February 1, 2001

3:46 PM

Warner Bros. Denies Manson Will Play WonkaNor will Tim Burton direct. I'm actually kind of disappointed. Compared to Nick Cage, Dustin Hoffman, or (bleagh) Robin Williams (as discussed here, March '00,) Manson might have actually been able to creep me out as completely as Gene Wilder did in the original.
posted by Tubes (20 comments total)

Coming Attractions has info on the quote that got the tabloids speculating Manson was going to be Wonka.
posted by pnevares at 3:55 PM on February 1, 2001

No, its Mr T that's playing Wonka.

WHAT FOOL CAN TAKE A SUNRISE
SPRINKLE IT WITH DEW
BETTER NOT BE ANY SLEEPING POWDER IN IT EITHER
COVER IT IN CHOCOLATE AND A MIRACLE OR TWO
ANSWER ME FOOL!
THE CANDY MAN
(HE WAS THE BADDEST CAT AROUND HERE TILL I SHOWED UP)
THE CANDY MAN CAN
MY FIST IS GOING TO SEE YOU LATER IF YOU DON'T GET THAT CHOCOLATE AWAY FROM ME.
posted by Zombie at 4:18 PM on February 1, 2001

damn. i SO thought it was the other manson. charles, for you youngsters.
posted by donkeysuck at 4:20 PM on February 1, 2001

i SO thought it was the other manson. charles, for you youngsters.
Me too! Does that mean I'm an old-timer?
posted by doublehelix at 4:44 PM on February 1, 2001

cast manson as wonka and you'll have a good old-fashioned creep-out that puts me in mind of the new pc game "alice"...

i'd pay $9 to see it.
posted by judomadonna at 5:54 PM on February 1, 2001

I'm disappointed, too. I *might* go see a remake of Willy Wonka. I'd *definitely* go see a remake of Willy Wonka with Manson in the lead role, if only for the weirdness factor.

Makes me wonder what kind of candies Manson would make...
posted by CrayDrygu at 9:44 PM on February 1, 2001

I think a new generation deserves to be as psychologically traumatized by the remake as I was by the original. I mean, what the hell were they thinking with that tunnel scene?

"Hi, kids, welcome to the Chocolate Factory. Nice in here, eh? Here's a lovely song for you. Now, let's get on the nice, fun boatie thing and we'll go through this tunnel, where we'll see CHICKENS BEING BEHEADED AND SNAKES CRAWLING OVER EYEBALLS AND GENERAL TERROR AND MAYHEM.....enjoy the rest of the tour"

Smashcut to me, twenty-five years later, lying on a shrink's couch...."I dunno doc, every time I close my eyes, I see headless chickens".

God, I love that movie. :)
posted by Optamystic at 10:00 PM on February 1, 2001

Am I the only person who thinks this is one movie that definitely doesn't need a remake? I mean, it's not like the old one is archaic enough to inaccessible to a new audience, or was not as good as is could have been with new technology. Willy Wonka and the Chocolate factory is one of my all-time favorite movies, and a remake will only detract from it, no matter WHO plays Wonka.
posted by dcodea at 5:45 AM on February 2, 2001

I guess Marilyn Manson is just desparate for any publicity.
posted by harmful at 6:05 AM on February 2, 2001

i SO thought it was the other manson. charles, for you youngsters.

Me too! Does that mean I'm an old-timer?

no, because that's what I thought of, too, and I'm 19.

Am I the only person who thinks this is one movie that definitely doesn't need a remake?

I agree... I don't think that movie could be (re)made now... I mean look at it... all these kids dying and them going "Oops! Oh well! He deserved it!" :) ...
posted by dagnyscott at 6:09 AM on February 2, 2001

Now that the idea of burton directing and manson starring has been planted in my head, anything else they do will be a let-down.
At least i kin still enjoy Tim and Wonka seperately... sigh...
posted by sonofsamiam at 7:28 AM on February 2, 2001

this is just wrong. manson as slugworth, perhaps... but wonka? the thing i read quoted manson as saying he would play him as satan, which, imo pretty much contradicts dahl's original intention. this is one of my all-time favorite movies, and possibly gene wilder's best work. and why does tim burton feel the need to sully every classic children's tale with his darker and gloomier vision?

i'm with dcodea (and dagnyscott); this is one movie that should not be re-made.

snozzberries!
posted by modge at 8:40 AM on February 2, 2001

Oh, man, what are you talking about? Manson would be great! Roald Dahl was a horror writer, children's lit was on the side. The book was scary, the sequel was scary, and the movie was scary.
Kids like weird things. At least I did.
posted by sonofsamiam at 8:44 AM on February 2, 2001

possibly gene wilder's best work

No, methinks that was Young Frankenstein (Good night, Frau Blucher)

In any case, why not leave Chocholate Factory alone and instead make some original flicks, hmmmm?
posted by Avogadro at 8:49 AM on February 2, 2001

Am I the only person who thinks this is one movie that definitely doesn't need a remake?

no, you're not.

the original stands on its own legs quite sturdily.

but burton and manson in the chocolate factory, though...the perfect combination to make a whole new generation of kids' skin crawl...
posted by judomadonna at 9:54 AM on February 2, 2001

I was impressed that Manson (see the Coming Attractions link) understood the subtext of the original story. Roald Dahl was no piker; he knew exactly what he was doing. By contrast, I'm disturbed that the studio used the word "reverence" in connection with the remake. Yikes. Our only hope is that Gary Ross is still attached to the project.
posted by dhartung at 10:32 AM on February 2, 2001

Manson is a smart guy, and hilarious. I used to blow him off until my friend went through his manson collection w/ me and showed me all these little, subtle things. I still don't dig his music, but I appreciate what he's doing.
posted by sonofsamiam at 10:36 AM on February 2, 2001

My favorite bit from the Coming Attractions link:

(to tune of Manson's "Beautiful People")
The Oompa Loompas, the Oompa Loompas....
the Ooompa Loompas, the Oompa Loompas..."

ROTFLMAO!
posted by Tubes at 10:50 AM on February 2, 2001

don't get me wrong, i still love weird things, and i do find marilyn manson amusing enough (although the Onion piece pretty much sums up my feelings about the whole shockrock thing. "so Alice Cooper..." heh).

i'm not worried so much about the possibility of manson playing wonka - rather that he indicated that he would play the character as satan. that doesn't seem to be in line with dahl's original vision, and the whole build up and realization that wonka seems to be a monster, only to find out that he was indeed 'good' and just in the end, is what makes it, at least for me.

how would the ending be resolved, were wonka to be portrayed as the prince of darkness? i dunno, the original did a damn fine job of scaring the sh*t out of me when i was an impressionable lil' shaver. hmm, is the devil even scary to today's youth?

"spitting's a dirty habit!"
posted by modge at 2:10 PM on February 2, 2001

modge, Wonka as Satan via Google. I'd love to do an essay on this versus Paradise Lost. What was Dahl's original vision again?
posted by dhartung at 7:49 PM on February 2, 2001