Daniel Radosh on Alternative Bibles

December 13, 2006 10:38 PM

While the standard King James Bible remains huge business for publishers, in recent years a number of alternative formats have sprung up, hoping to capture the niche Christian dollar, or more charitably, to spread the good word to an audience that wouldn't find the tradtional bible all that relevant. Daniel Radosh's piece in the New Yorker examines the alterna-Bible publishing phenomenon, along with a great slideshow of several in-market concepts.
posted by jonson (16 comments total)

For those who find the Bible too full of words & devoid of illustration, the Flaming Fire's Illustrated Bible is soliciting artists to draw every verse (2853 down, 33812 to go).
posted by jonson at 10:39 PM on December 13, 2006

"For the time will come when they will not endure sound doctrine; but wanting to have their ears tickled, they will accumulate for themselves teachers in accordance to their own desires," — 1 Tim. 4:3 (New American Standard Bible)
posted by spock at 10:53 PM on December 13, 2006

And “The Personal Promise Bible” is custom-printed with the owner’s name (“The LORD is Daniel’s shepherd”), home town (“Woe to you, Brooklyn! Woe to you, New York!”), and spouse’s name (“Gina’s two breasts are like two fawns”).

Maybe that's a little too personal.
posted by dw at 11:06 PM on December 13, 2006

dw: I saw that bible at the Azuza Street Centenial at the LA Convention Center. It was being hawked by some Pentecostals at a booth. I was right tempted to get it, but the waiting period while they personalize it is pretty long -- 3 months will kill most impulse buys -- even personalized bibles.
posted by Strawman at 12:04 AM on December 14, 2006

Jason Alexander, of “Seinfeld,” is signed on for an unspecified Old Testament character.

"This manna is making me thirsty!"
posted by Horace Rumpole at 4:44 AM on December 14, 2006 [1 favorite]

From the New Yorker article: In Denver, Zondervan showcased “The Bible Experience,” featuring just about every black actor in Hollywood, from Denzel Washington to Garrett Morris, and starring Blair Underwood as Jesus and Samuel L. Jackson as God.

Oh my.
posted by dr_dank at 5:31 AM on December 14, 2006

You can consecrate the market

OK, so I'm merely an ex-Christian and thus my opinion is irrelevant on these subjects, but somehow that statement still offends me (y'know, the whole money-changer/temple thing).
posted by aramaic at 6:11 AM on December 14, 2006 [1 favorite]

“Jesus Loves Porn Stars” (NavPress; $8.99). Created by XXXchurch, which ministers to the pornography industry. Another publisher rejected the title as inappropriate, if theologically sound.

No Feederz^{(lyrics, scroll down)} jokes, please.
posted by languagehat at 6:14 AM on December 14, 2006

Oh mi gawd! Are we sure that slide show is for real? Because that is comedy gold!

“The Story” (Zondervan; $17.99). A novelistic modern translation, told in chronological order and omitting “obscure genealogies and ancient dietary laws.”

Why do I get the idea that Christians are tired of hearing about the shellfish-homosexual analogy? Fine. We'll just remove those tedious little bits about what you can and cannot eat.

But my favorite was:

“Revolve” (Thomas Nelson; $16.99). Created after Thomas Nelson discovered that girls preferred magazines to the Bible.

14 Ways to Retain Your Vrginity!

25 Tips on How to Appear Sexy AND Holy!

7 Secrets to Beautiful, Biblical Hair!

4 Saucy Women From The Bible Tell Their Stories!

11 Skin Tips From The Apostles!
posted by Secret Life of Gravy at 6:44 AM on December 14, 2006

In the last week, I've viewed exhibits of a modern illuminated Bible and the most ancient texts in existence. It's good to live in DC.
posted by MrMoonPie at 7:03 AM on December 14, 2006

I'm wondering if the recently discussed GODMEN have their own macho, testerone filled, great big balls Bible.
posted by nofundy at 7:44 AM on December 14, 2006

On first glance I thought the faithgurlz' Bible was a package of, ahem, female hygiene products. Same saturated pastels, same floral graphics, same poofy script.
posted by casarkos at 7:58 AM on December 14, 2006

I'm wondering if the recently discussed GODMEN have their own macho, testerone filled, great big balls Bible.

Duh.
posted by dw at 8:47 AM on December 14, 2006

dw: I saw that bible at the Azuza Street Centenial at the LA Convention Center.

Wait wait wait wait. A MeFite went to the Azuza Street Centennial?
posted by dw at 8:54 AM on December 14, 2006

Samuel L. Jackson as God

Parody as prophecy. The relevant bit's near the end
posted by Iridic at 1:12 PM on December 14, 2006

On first glance I thought the faithgurlz' Bible was a package of, ahem, female hygiene products. Same saturated pastels, same floral graphics, same poofy script.
posted by casarkos at 10:58 AM EST on December 14

I thought the same thing. Maybe the books of the Bible rolled into little scrolls to be used in case of an emergency? I'm going to hell for sure.
posted by Secret Life of Gravy at 3:01 PM on December 14, 2006