puppy love
January 21, 2007 2:16 PM Subscribe
I hope I don't sound that stupid when I make my dog talk.
posted by sarahmelah at 2:26 PM on January 21, 2007
posted by sarahmelah at 2:26 PM on January 21, 2007
If I ever teach my dog to talk, I'll skip the 'i-love-you's and focus on getting him to say "Puttin' on the Riiiiitz!", in tribute to the great Peter Boyle.
posted by maryh at 2:33 PM on January 21, 2007 [3 favorites]
posted by maryh at 2:33 PM on January 21, 2007 [3 favorites]
So, pugs are like the cats of the dog world, right?
posted by Chuckles at 2:39 PM on January 21, 2007
posted by Chuckles at 2:39 PM on January 21, 2007
Yeah, yeah. If pugs could talk it'd be more like "I *snort* want *snort* to *snort* die *snort*!"
Poor bastards.
posted by mr_crash_davis at 2:39 PM on January 21, 2007 [2 favorites]
Poor bastards.
posted by mr_crash_davis at 2:39 PM on January 21, 2007 [2 favorites]
The sounds those dogs are making are the auditory equivalent of seeing Jesus in a tortilla.
posted by interrobang at 2:41 PM on January 21, 2007 [1 favorite]
posted by interrobang at 2:41 PM on January 21, 2007 [1 favorite]
Even if it's completely random, those dogs made me laugh. That last cat fuh-reaked me out. My mom's cat says something that sounds a lot like "hello". While she was visiting me last weekend, Mom spent her down time trying to teach my cat to say "hello". I wish she could get back on those hormones (my mom, not the cat).
posted by kimdog at 3:29 PM on January 21, 2007
posted by kimdog at 3:29 PM on January 21, 2007
That one on the last link in the OP was freaky deaky.
posted by Cyclopsis Raptor at 3:30 PM on January 21, 2007
posted by Cyclopsis Raptor at 3:30 PM on January 21, 2007
My dog can say "wolf".
That reminds me of a joke:
A man walks into a bar with his dog. He tells all the patrons that his dog is a talking dog and he offers a demonstration if the bartender will agree to give him free drinks for the evening...
The bartender agrees, and the man asks the dog, "What's on top of a house?"... "ROOF!" answers the dog...
"How does sandpaper feel?"... "ROUGH!" answers the dog...
"Who is the greatest baseball player of all time?"... "RUTH!" answers the dog...
The bartender throws the man and dog out of the bar...
As they're walking away, the dog turns to the man and says, "Maybe I should have answered DiMaggio."
posted by amyms at 3:32 PM on January 21, 2007 [2 favorites]
That reminds me of a joke:
A man walks into a bar with his dog. He tells all the patrons that his dog is a talking dog and he offers a demonstration if the bartender will agree to give him free drinks for the evening...
The bartender agrees, and the man asks the dog, "What's on top of a house?"... "ROOF!" answers the dog...
"How does sandpaper feel?"... "ROUGH!" answers the dog...
"Who is the greatest baseball player of all time?"... "RUTH!" answers the dog...
The bartender throws the man and dog out of the bar...
As they're walking away, the dog turns to the man and says, "Maybe I should have answered DiMaggio."
posted by amyms at 3:32 PM on January 21, 2007 [2 favorites]
That's it, the END OF METAFILTER.
posted by mr_crash_davis at 4:15 PM on January 21, 2007 [2 favorites]
posted by mr_crash_davis at 4:15 PM on January 21, 2007 [2 favorites]
Most entertaining, nickyskye. Apparently pugs have many talents. Witness a pug imitating a blender and pug bowling.
...and just because I may not find a more suitable place to post this, I give you the farting dog harmonics.
posted by madamjujujive at 4:57 PM on January 21, 2007 [1 favorite]
...and just because I may not find a more suitable place to post this, I give you the farting dog harmonics.
posted by madamjujujive at 4:57 PM on January 21, 2007 [1 favorite]
That dog in the 3rd link is like nine or fifteen times smarter than my dog.
posted by damehex at 6:54 PM on January 21, 2007
posted by damehex at 6:54 PM on January 21, 2007
The white dog that opens the door is the smartest dog in the universe.
posted by T.D. Strange at 7:34 PM on January 21, 2007
posted by T.D. Strange at 7:34 PM on January 21, 2007
Muhammad fellating Christ. I honestly don't know if dogs have some sort of integral dignity. So I'm left to wonder are those video clips some sort of proof? Proof that even dogs deserve respect?
posted by econous at 7:43 PM on January 21, 2007
posted by econous at 7:43 PM on January 21, 2007
The last cat in amyms' link sounds like the Man from Another Place in Twin Peaks.
posted by Brittanie at 7:56 PM on January 21, 2007
posted by Brittanie at 7:56 PM on January 21, 2007
I think interrobang has it right.
What we are seeing here are strange canine vocalizations that are being rewarded with attention from the owner; subsequently encouraging the animal to repeat this trick on command. Much like a Rorschach test, the owner, hearing this repeated pattern is interpreting it, and making it fit their personal schema. At the end of the day, what these owners believe their dogs are saying says more about them and their state of mind than any actual speech on the dog's part.
At least that is how my parrot tried to explain it to me. I still don't understand exactly what he meant, so he made me type it out verbatim. Fucking bird.
posted by quin at 9:12 PM on January 21, 2007
What we are seeing here are strange canine vocalizations that are being rewarded with attention from the owner; subsequently encouraging the animal to repeat this trick on command. Much like a Rorschach test, the owner, hearing this repeated pattern is interpreting it, and making it fit their personal schema. At the end of the day, what these owners believe their dogs are saying says more about them and their state of mind than any actual speech on the dog's part.
At least that is how my parrot tried to explain it to me. I still don't understand exactly what he meant, so he made me type it out verbatim. Fucking bird.
posted by quin at 9:12 PM on January 21, 2007
So on Brittanie's suggestion, I watched madamjujujive's pug bowling video. Or more specifically, I watched the first 1:20 of the video where it has shown us a pug, a bowling pin, a can of Pledge, a laser pointer, and hardwood floors. That is where I stopped, ran into the other room to get the Wife so she could see what was sure to be great entertainment.
We were most definitely not disappointed.
posted by quin at 9:29 PM on January 21, 2007
We were most definitely not disappointed.
posted by quin at 9:29 PM on January 21, 2007
MetaFilter: Muhammad fellating Christ.
posted by homunculus at 10:04 PM on January 21, 2007
posted by homunculus at 10:04 PM on January 21, 2007
"The dog's anuses are disturbingly visible" - just like in real life.
posted by vronsky at 10:41 PM on January 21, 2007
posted by vronsky at 10:41 PM on January 21, 2007
That's nothing. I've seen where human beings have been trained to say "I love you" (or simply "love you," either because it's easier to articulate or less self-incriminating) in exchange for food, cash, or sex.
posted by pracowity at 5:00 AM on January 22, 2007
posted by pracowity at 5:00 AM on January 22, 2007
Was anybody else expecting the dog-opening door to erase the incriminating answering machine message?
posted by skryche at 8:49 AM on January 22, 2007
posted by skryche at 8:49 AM on January 22, 2007
The sounds those dogs are making are the auditory equivalent of seeing Jesus in a tortilla.
That would be true if the tortilla could be trained to replicate the image. :)
posted by nickyskye at 10:23 AM on January 22, 2007
That would be true if the tortilla could be trained to replicate the image. :)
posted by nickyskye at 10:23 AM on January 22, 2007
Was anybody else expecting the dog-opening door to erase the incriminating answering machine message? I was expecting something similar, I thought the doggy would saunter back in, the lady on the phone would say something like "It's OK, he has gone back inside the house now." I loved the way he opened the door and just stood at the threshold casually checking out the neighborhood before going out. One cool pup. Those other pups are sellouts though. I can't imagine a cat doing this, they have some self respect. Although this pussy seems to be jonesing.
posted by econous at 10:55 AM on January 22, 2007
posted by econous at 10:55 AM on January 22, 2007
"The sounds those dogs are making are the auditory equivalent of seeing Jesus in a tortilla."
That is weak thinking.
What about the recent study of dog intelligence that said the smartest breeds can understand up to 100 words and have an equivalent intelligence of a 3 year old human. When your three year old says "I wuv you", is that the same as seeing jesus in a taco?
Whether or not pugs were one of the smarter breeds I don't remember. Pug owners?
posted by vronsky at 1:55 PM on January 22, 2007
That is weak thinking.
What about the recent study of dog intelligence that said the smartest breeds can understand up to 100 words and have an equivalent intelligence of a 3 year old human. When your three year old says "I wuv you", is that the same as seeing jesus in a taco?
Whether or not pugs were one of the smarter breeds I don't remember. Pug owners?
posted by vronsky at 1:55 PM on January 22, 2007
The thing with dog fart harmonics is that usually when dogs lay a stinky, it's a little squeak with a huge stench, the almost silent and totally deadly kind. But it was a waggy tailed idea. :)
posted by nickyskye at 7:32 PM on January 22, 2007
posted by nickyskye at 7:32 PM on January 22, 2007
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posted by docgonzo at 2:21 PM on January 21, 2007