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That's one baaaaad (but sadly, now dead) moose.
March 5, 2007 10:01 PM   Subscribe


 
If only they'd had a trusty moosedog!
posted by Smilla's Sense of Snark at 10:11 PM on March 5, 2007 [1 favorite]


A møøse bit my sister once.

/oh wait, this isn't fark
posted by taursir at 10:12 PM on March 5, 2007


Um...ok, kinda short article there. More details. Perhaps it's revenge for the recent moose lifts.
posted by mediareport at 10:12 PM on March 5, 2007


I really wanted this to be a single youtube link.
posted by T.D. Strange at 10:13 PM on March 5, 2007


Moose maimed. Squirrel still at large.
posted by miss lynnster at 10:16 PM on March 5, 2007 [1 favorite]


Thanks, mediareport!
posted by flapjax at midnite at 10:22 PM on March 5, 2007


Best. Thing that happened. Ever.
posted by poweredbybeard at 10:31 PM on March 5, 2007


Um, poweredbybeard, that's: EVAR.
posted by flapjax at midnite at 10:39 PM on March 5, 2007


Best. Thing that happened. Ever.

Well, with the possible exception of the moose killing afterwards.
posted by IronLizard at 10:43 PM on March 5, 2007


Hmmm, what I meant was: It's not so great because the moose was killed afterwards.
posted by IronLizard at 10:44 PM on March 5, 2007


Sigh.

Best. Thing that happened. EVAR. In principle.

Can I go now?
posted by poweredbybeard at 10:48 PM on March 5, 2007


good headline, anyway.
that guy needs to take some lessons on tranquilizing.
target practice, whatever it takes.
posted by Busithoth at 10:51 PM on March 5, 2007


good lord. how can anyone possibly say no to a headline like that [interrobang].
posted by vellocet at 11:03 PM on March 5, 2007


and, no before anyone jumps on it, not the mefite. durr.
posted by vellocet at 11:04 PM on March 5, 2007


A month or so ago, an eagle tried to lug a deer head out of the dump, hit a power line, and blew itself up. Power was out for about an hour. I have been told that moose have only recently migrated down to Gustavus and are totally booming in population. I guess it is a cyclical thing and that the population will eventually bust and I won't have any more moose burger in my freezer.
posted by Foam Pants at 11:34 PM on March 5, 2007 [1 favorite]


Eagle with a deer head hits a power line?

I think that's got a lock on "tails" for the Alaska state quarter.
posted by unregistered_animagus at 11:41 PM on March 5, 2007 [1 favorite]


.
posted by econous at 12:41 AM on March 6, 2007


Hovering helicopter maims drugged moose!
posted by algreer at 2:38 AM on March 6, 2007 [1 favorite]


A month or so ago, an eagle tried to lug a deer head out of the dump, hit a power line, and blew itself up

And in August, this bear met a similar fate. What is with the wildlife up there?

Anyway that is (was) one bad moose; unlike Rambo, he didn't even need a bow and arrow.
posted by TedW at 4:30 AM on March 6, 2007


Next on Where Are They Now?, the tragic story of the Get-Along Gang's Montgomery Moose.

M. MOOSE: Meth is a hell of a drug. It makes you do crazy things. You feel like you can take on the world.

NARRATOR: On that fateful day when Montgomery tried to take on a helicopter, the former child star knew he had hit rock bottom.

M. MOOSE: I was like, what the hell man. No wife, kids gone, no money, why the BLEEP not should I take on that BLEEPin chopper?
posted by robocop is bleeding at 5:02 AM on March 6, 2007


"As the animal got closer and closer to going down, an animal sort of loses its thinking -- its ability to rationalize what's in its best interest," Larsen said.

Uh huh. I like the idea of a moose rationalizing anything. They're just SO impulsive.
posted by fourcheesemac at 5:13 AM on March 6, 2007


Please insert moose. Thank you.
posted by steef at 5:38 AM on March 6, 2007


"Please insert moose. Thank you."

OK, but it doesn't make any sense.
posted by mr_crash_davis at 7:12 AM on March 6, 2007 [2 favorites]


Makes perfect sense to me!
posted by flapjax at midnite at 7:24 AM on March 6, 2007


Exactly! [Bows deeply before mr_crash_davis.]
posted by steef at 7:25 AM on March 6, 2007


A shame. I wanted to see that moose trundle home with a helicopter tail rotor for a hood ornament.
posted by dreamsign at 7:33 AM on March 6, 2007 [1 favorite]


This isn't really as fantastic as it sounds. A grown man, sufficiently motivated, could also disable a small Bell/Huey type helicopter if he aimed himself in the right spot. Although he probably would be dismembered or disemboweled or something horrific.
posted by Burhanistan at 8:00 AM on March 6, 2007


not so great because the moose was killed afterwards

That's pretty much my sex life in a nutshell.
posted by CynicalKnight at 8:20 AM on March 6, 2007


Not impressed.
posted by LordSludge at 10:08 AM on March 6, 2007


Great, now Iraqi militants will be arming themselves with Moose-o-matics...
posted by Midnight Creeper at 10:59 AM on March 6, 2007


Hey Rock! Watch me pull a helicopter outta my ass!
Nothin’ up my sleeve....PRESTO! *crash!*

You know, Moose are in the bonanza range of dumb enough to be dangerous. Some people you just don’t mess with because it’s just not worth it even if you win. They’re just too dumb to get it. Same thing here. It seems to be a pretty good short term survival trait. Especially if moose wants to be left the hell alone.
posted by Smedleyman at 11:30 AM on March 6, 2007


Finally, man invents a better moose trap.
posted by dhartung at 12:10 PM on March 6, 2007




funkbrain: So Alan Sokal has finally applied his talents to high-energy physics, then?

Excellent, excellent. Carry on.
posted by eritain at 8:53 PM on March 6, 2007


I just want to know if we're allowed to show up at Mr. White's house with tranq guns, and herd him around with helicopters after we shoot him...ya know, so we can tag him and track free range biologists.
posted by dejah420 at 9:58 PM on March 6, 2007 [1 favorite]


He keeps charging like that it's going to damage his credit rating.
posted by Smedleyman at 10:34 PM on March 6, 2007


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