Shiny happy people

March 8, 2007 4:31 PM

To Baldy Go: Thinking of shaving your head? Undergoing chemotherapy? Afraid you'll lose a bet? If you want to see what you'd look like bald, the friendly fellow at BaldlyGo will baldify your picture, free of charge, whether you're an average man, woman, teen or even a world leader. Here's the demo for the private service.
posted by Pater Aletheias (51 comments total)

"Private service" meaning that he won't publicly post the pic of your virtual shiny pate, of course. I know what you pervs were thinking.
posted by Pater Aletheias at 4:32 PM on March 8, 2007

This is dumb.
posted by stenseng at 4:38 PM on March 8, 2007

Sometimes I really hate the Web.
posted by psmealey at 4:40 PM on March 8, 2007

nice comment, stenseng.

What's up with the fake goatees?
posted by ORthey at 4:40 PM on March 8, 2007

So he's got a copy of Photoshop? Wow.
Sorry, pater, but I have to flag this one.
posted by lekvar at 4:40 PM on March 8, 2007

Everyone looks good bald if they have a perfectly spherical skull.
posted by inconsequentialist at 4:43 PM on March 8, 2007

Sorry, pater, but I have to flag this one.

I figured you would. Nice of you to say so, though.
posted by Pater Aletheias at 4:46 PM on March 8, 2007

Jeeze, just shave it already, if you're interested.
It'll grow back.
posted by Balisong at 4:52 PM on March 8, 2007

I'm getting there fast enough on my own. I don't really need to pay for a picture of what I'll look like in a few years.
posted by briank at 4:58 PM on March 8, 2007

Wow. Those are some awful photoshops.
posted by cortex at 5:00 PM on March 8, 2007

worst photoshop evar !
posted by Jikido at 5:04 PM on March 8, 2007

Everyone looks good bald if they have a perfectly spherical skull.

When I shaved my head I got tons of compliments, one person even guessed (correctly) that I must have been born through cesarean section.
posted by arcticwoman at 5:06 PM on March 8, 2007

Joe Friday: [looking at a lion who's mane has been shaved into a mohawk] Somebody must have wanted that lion's mane pretty bad to pull a twisted stunt like that.

Pep Streebeck: Although, as mohawks go it's not that bad. It'll grow back.

Joe Friday: Yeah, and how do you tell that to these kids here who have never seen a lion before and now probably won't have the desire to ever see one again.

Pep Streebeck: Kids, it'll grow back.

Kids: YAY!
posted by ColdChef at 5:07 PM on March 8, 2007 [1 favorite]

I look forward to shaving my head again (stupid Wisconsin winters...), there is just something nice about not needing to worry about whether or not my hair is going to play nice that day.
posted by quin at 5:11 PM on March 8, 2007

Now if this was really Web 2.0, it would mash up with Mechanical Turk to farm out the bad photoshopping to a million webmonkeys and rely on the wisdom of crowds to tag my photo so that I could find similar bald people and get an atom feed of the results.

Then this guy would be on the front page of O'Reilly Radar.
posted by xthlc at 5:14 PM on March 8, 2007

...er...
a via link perhaps?
posted by nj_subgenius at 5:16 PM on March 8, 2007

Email me and I will do the same for $9.00
posted by fire&wings at 5:19 PM on March 8, 2007

OMG LOOKOUT PATER NJ_SUBGENIUS IS LOOKING OVER YOU SHOULDER WHILE YOU SURF THE INTERNETS.
posted by eyeballkid at 5:23 PM on March 8, 2007 [1 favorite]

I've never heard of everlastingblort before. Sorry, I think your ESP is a bit off today.
posted by Pater Aletheias at 5:38 PM on March 8, 2007

ok then!
i'm watching you, eyeballkid...
posted by nj_subgenius at 5:45 PM on March 8, 2007

You know, now that I think about it, you guys are probably right. Maybe it is a crap link. The thing is, back on the farm where I was raised, my family couldn't afford even basic computers, and something like Photoshop might as well have been on Alpha Centauri. We made do with pen and paper, and Momma handmade all our clothes. The year that she was diagnosed with cancer, we started making regular trips into the big city a couple of hours away. I remember how frustrating everything was--wrestling with insurance, getting second opinions. Momma hadn't finished high school and words like "oncologist" were hard for her to wrap her tongue around. She'd say "onk-a-hologist" but she knew that wasn't right and just started saying "specialist." Anyway, she had to get chemo, and she knew she'd probably lose her hair, and I remember how she said to me, "I just wish there were some kind of magic mirror that would let me see what will look like." But there wasn't, of course.

That was twenty years back, and when I saw the pictures on Baldy Go, I thought to myself, "It's cheesy, sure, but there it is--Momma's magic mirror." And I thought about all the moms who might get a little comfort if I spread the word a little. I got a little teary-eyed as I posted the link.

But you're probably right. We simple folk have a hard time adjusting to the new world we're in, and I guess magic mirrors are a dime a dozen in 2007. Go ahead, flag away. Momma would understand.
posted by Pater Aletheias at 5:48 PM on March 8, 2007 [15 favorites]

Coincidentally, the usually totally useless NYT Style section ran an article today about the new market in headcare products for bald men.
posted by mediareport at 5:50 PM on March 8, 2007

I have to flag this one.

Jesus. What flag did you use? "I didn't cream my pants over this one, sorry"?
posted by mediareport at 5:51 PM on March 8, 2007

Holy Moly, this is getting weird.
posted by nj_subgenius at 5:54 PM on March 8, 2007

Pater: That's only funny if you're serious.
posted by Roman Graves at 5:55 PM on March 8, 2007

If only someone had let Britney know about this.
posted by tellurian at 5:58 PM on March 8, 2007 [1 favorite]

Only problem is that I doubt he could probably scupt in the mangled, misshapen, scarred, cratered travesty I am sure my head is today.

Yup. Lot of head trauma. Could be a poster child, even..
posted by Samizdata at 6:01 PM on March 8, 2007 [1 favorite]

Actually, I like that site. Thanks Peter Aletheias. Having spent years around Buddhist monks and nuns I grew fond of a shaved pate, enjoys the way it makes facial features stand out more intensely. In the last few years it's become the thing to shave one's head. Some people can carry it off better than others. Handy to have a preview.

I always wanted to shave my head but never had the guts. Chemo made the decision for me. For others undergoing chemo I can imagine this site might help the ordeal of becoming hairless as part of trying to save one's life easier to accept, seeing how one would look in advance.
posted by nickyskye at 6:03 PM on March 8, 2007

I shaved my head once. Holy crap was my head cold without any hair. As bad as my hair was, going without just made me look like a serial killer. Didn't shave it again. Nature is having the last laugh, however, as most of it has decided to fall out and never return.
posted by Joe Invisible at 6:06 PM on March 8, 2007

Did you look at the examples before you posted this? Because they're horrible.
posted by puke & cry at 6:13 PM on March 8, 2007 [1 favorite]

In a lot of pictures the dome is obviously much smaller then it actually is.

Therefore, this is lame. Wake me when they get a backscatter X-ray machine.
posted by delmoi at 6:14 PM on March 8, 2007

Jesus. What flag did you use? "I didn't cream my pants over this one, sorry"?

I had to use "other" because ther's no "godawful" flag. My first thought was that this was someone trying to self-link, though Pater's history convinced me otherwise.
posted by lekvar at 6:20 PM on March 8, 2007

It sure would be cool if he did one of Britney Spears, huh?
posted by breezeway at 6:52 PM on March 8, 2007

It sure would be cool if he did one of Britney Spears, huh?

It sure would be cool if he did Britney Spears one, huh?

There, fixed that for you.
posted by loquacious at 7:03 PM on March 8, 2007

I dressed up as Sinead O'Connor for Halloween once. Did the bald wig thing. Apparently I was very very hawt as a bald girl.
But then again, I was 22...
posted by miss lynnster at 7:45 PM on March 8, 2007

Is it just me, or is there something funny about specifying a gender in that sentence? As if to say, "I'd been dressing as Yul Brynner for years and it didn't do a damn thing for me, but then...."
posted by nebulawindphone at 7:59 PM on March 8, 2007

well, Sinead IS a girl. Until She tells us otherwise.
posted by longsleeves at 8:35 PM on March 8, 2007

A most ingenious new technology, as it was described to me: a "web site" to which patrons could up-load photographic portraits of themselves or others, and for a small fee have the Pregnant F/X rendering engine modify the image such that it portrayed the sitter as heavy with child!
posted by Simon! at 8:37 PM on March 8, 2007

Actually miss lynnster, I work in a company that is predominantly black, and one thing I found quite interesting was the number of older ladies that keep their heads shaved. At least I found it interesting after I noticed that several of the younger women were picking up on it as well.

I'm beginning to see some of the white ladies cutting their hair shorter and shorter as well (slightly longer than crewcuts). It is a trend that the Hispanic women have completely eschewed however.

I don't know what your ethnic background is, but as a look, it might be coming in style.

/anecdote: It's a media company and we get lots of tickets to sporting events and the like, generally I avoid these because I'm not big into the whole sport scene, but they got us seats at the Milwaukee Mile, which is a Formula F1 race. I'd never been to one and thought it might be fun for me and the Wife. Unfortunately, at the last minute she had a work related emergency and had to bail on me.

I decided to go alone, and as I was entering the main gate, I saw a co-worker from a different department. As it was her first race too, we decided to sit together. We figured we could better hide our confusion as a team.

The thing that made it fun was that we had both shaved our heads the night before, so we found some humor in the lovely black woman and the skinny white guy sitting together in the stands with the sun glistening off the tops of our shiny domes.
posted by quin at 8:41 PM on March 8, 2007

I had to use "other" because ther's no "godawful" flag.

Just because you don't like something doesn't mean it violates the guidelines in some way. Skip over the posts you don't like - what's difficult about that concept for you?
posted by mediareport at 8:47 PM on March 8, 2007

Look mediareport, the rules are simple.
Every time a link is made to a product or service, some asshole has to post "PepsiBlue" or "Flagged as blah blah blah." Especially if the product or service is not especially amusing. I drew the short straw this round, I'm just fulfilling my obligation. You did get the memo, right?

Unless you're the one who drew the "Flag it and move on, asshole" straw, in which case good job.
posted by lekvar at 8:56 PM on March 8, 2007

I wish you were as funny as Pater. I really do. But seriously, next time just stay out of threads you think are lame, ok?
posted by mediareport at 9:00 PM on March 8, 2007

Well, since my name is MISS lynnster I was thinking that my gender wasn't necessary to announce. But then again, when I was a waitress in LA I once worked with a black guy who went by "Shaniqua"... so upon reflection I suppose you never really know.
posted by miss lynnster at 9:48 PM on March 8, 2007

Metafilter: Bald heads and boring tools.
posted by gorgor_balabala at 9:49 PM on March 8, 2007

Off topic... I started work for a new client a few weeks ago, a design firm that specializes in beverage packaging. I was looking at a shelf of product today and guess what product they worked on?

Yup. Pepsi Blue.
posted by miss lynnster at 9:51 PM on March 8, 2007

Hmm, I've had my head shaved for about 4.5 years now. I wonder if I sent them a picture of me before I shave it how much the result would look like me.
posted by JMOZ at 10:22 PM on March 8, 2007

Well, since my name is MISS lynnster I was thinking that my gender wasn't necessary to announce.

/looks over thread with some confusion.

Ok, if this is a reference to my comment, then yeah. I got that you were a chick. That is why my comment was about how many people I work with, particularly those of the female persuasion, have decided to shave their heads...

And more than some of them are really lovely for making that choice. I mean, good hair is an easy way to be beautiful. But if you can pull off bald, you are just a hotty.

Hate me for that statement, but I will stand by it.
posted by quin at 11:09 PM on March 8, 2007

Um. No.

You never know what you'll look like bald until you take the plunge. There's always the possibility of some misshapen lump or unsightly marks, and this isn't going to tell you.

(still one of my favorite cuts)
posted by dreamsign at 1:30 AM on March 9, 2007

I don't need to use this service since I own a mirror. Of course I don't have to actually shave my head to call myself bald, either.
posted by SteveInMaine at 3:22 AM on March 9, 2007

No, quin. I was referring to this one. And even it was, why would I hate you for saying you work with hot bald chicks?
Besides, I may act like a cranky old person sometimes (even though I'm not old) but hey, I'm a lover not a hater baybee. :)
posted by miss lynnster at 5:55 AM on March 9, 2007

I shaved my head a bunch of times when I was a young dyke. It was the thing to do. Now that I'm a grown hasbian, it would just look silly.

(I also looked like a twelve year old chemo patient, and there's nothing wrong with that, it's just not the look I'm going for.)
posted by grapefruitmoon at 7:20 PM on March 9, 2007