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March 12, 2007 11:40 AM   Subscribe

Newsfilter: Israel has recalled its ambassador to El Salvador after he was found drunk and naked apart from bondage gear. Reports say he was able to identify himself to police only after a rubber ball had been removed from his mouth. Oy! More here. This isn't the first time an Israeli ambassador has gotten in trouble, either. Previously on Metafilter: The Swedish Art Incident
posted by zarq (67 comments total) 1 user marked this as a favorite

 
I'm sorry - what crime has this man committed?
posted by poweredbybeard at 11:45 AM on March 12, 2007 [1 favorite]


Whole new meaning to "sensitive diplomatic maneuvers".
posted by telstar at 11:48 AM on March 12, 2007 [1 favorite]


poweredbybeard, None and Israel says so. But he's not exactly acting like a dignified representative, either.
posted by zarq at 11:54 AM on March 12, 2007


No crime has been committed. However, regardless of one's views on BDSM between consenting adults I would say that this event is worth a titter. You have to wonder what the story was behind this.

Possibly worth noting that drunken outdoor BDSM antics are best restricted to areas that are private enough not to attract police attention. Or maybe that was all part of the play.

This thread is useless without pictures.
posted by asok at 11:56 AM on March 12, 2007


He should change his name to Tom and apply for a diplomat's position with Finland.
posted by The Straightener at 11:57 AM on March 12, 2007 [2 favorites]


nice title!
posted by Mach5 at 12:01 PM on March 12, 2007


It's not a crime, but darn it's funny when embarassing things happen to people who aren't me, for a change.
posted by Green Eyed Monster at 12:11 PM on March 12, 2007 [1 favorite]


Wait, didn't that happen to Shirley Temple Black too? Oh, wait... I guess not. Nevermind.
posted by miss lynnster at 12:14 PM on March 12, 2007


Drunk, gagged, bound and left alone is a life-threatening situation. People die if they aspirate their vomit. At the very least the guy needs to find a better top. If his SM proclivities were well-known I'd look at this as either fun and games with a stupid top, or attempted murder.
posted by jet_silver at 12:23 PM on March 12, 2007 [3 favorites]


This is so awesome I can't stand it. But I'd love to crawl around in it. Maybe submerge myself in it. Just for a little while.
posted by four panels at 12:40 PM on March 12, 2007 [1 favorite]


Henceforth to be known only as "The Ambassador."
posted by four panels at 12:49 PM on March 12, 2007


Gotta love it.

Middle East Times: "It was the first time [Israeli Ambassador Tsuriel] Rephael, who had held a technical position in the ministry before his posting to San Salvador, had ever distinguished himself in any way, the [foreign ministry] official added."
posted by ericb at 12:50 PM on March 12, 2007 [4 favorites]


Now we just need Ving Rhames and Bruce Willis to do a little snappy dialog.
posted by malaprohibita at 12:51 PM on March 12, 2007


HAHA LOLISRAELIZZ

or is it LOLAMBASSADORZZ ?!!!?
posted by Mister_A at 12:54 PM on March 12, 2007


What now? Let me tell you what now. I'ma call a coupla hard, pipe-hittin' katsas, who'll go to work on the goyam here with a pair of pliers and a blow torch. You hear me talkin', Salvadorian boy? I ain't through with you by a damn sight. I'ma get Metsada on your ass. You should get cancer you sonava...
posted by Smedleyman at 12:55 PM on March 12, 2007 [2 favorites]


And...Smedleyman to the rescue.
posted by malaprohibita at 1:01 PM on March 12, 2007


First, believe me when I say I have met some crazy diplomatic corp-folk in my life, and the Israelis (and not suprisingly, the Aussies) have been some of the most insane I have come across.
That said, given the wallop taken by the Israelis with their diplomats of late, I wanna know what their training program is like, and how does one get in? Can a shiksa apply? I want to play!
posted by msali at 1:06 PM on March 12, 2007 [1 favorite]


Maybe he had been put under a gag order?
posted by Midnight Creeper at 1:11 PM on March 12, 2007 [2 favorites]


We are in Asia without the characteristics of Asians. We don't have yellow skin and slanted eyes. Asia is basically the yellow race. Australia and Israel are not - we are basically the white race.

Wait, the Israeli ambassador to Australia is a white supremacist?
posted by Slarty Bartfast at 1:14 PM on March 12, 2007


Metafilter: mwuh mwuh!!! mwuh mwuh mwuh... Fuck me, thanks.
posted by phaedon at 1:16 PM on March 12, 2007


Israel's image at nadir.

Israel is no longer viewed as a thriving, high tech superpower or even as a brutal occupation power. It is viewed in a completely different light:

It's seen as a declining and dysfunctional country whose president is about to face charges of rape, whose prime minister will be interrogated on suspicion of advancing his associates' interests, whose finance minister will be ousted from his post due to an affair involving finances and non-profit organizations, whose army chief already resigned due to the failures of the war, and whose defense minister will soon be forced to follow suit.


No great honor being an Israeli (al-Jazeera, quoting above).

Ten years ago, Israel was listed 10th in an honesty league compiled by Transparency International, an anti-corruption group based in Berlin. But it has now fallen to 34th place. Israel's image is at an all-time low, and its political leadership is under renewed pressure.

Is Israel falling apart?

Foreign observers of Israel tend to focus so intently on the dangers the country faces from its Arab neighbours that they have largely missed an astonishing story that has been accelerating over the past few months: that of the Jewish state’s possible move toward internal collapse.

If you consider this an exaggeration, just take note of what the past couple of weeks have brought about. A few days ago the chief of the Israeli police resigned after an investigation that found several of Israel’s highest police officers guilty of corruption and negligence.

This came within a week of the forced resignation of Israel’s Chief of Staff from the military because of the fiascos of the second Lebanon war. It was also some ten days after Israel’s minister of justice was convicted of sexual assault while on duty, and a couple of weeks after Israel’s president – who holds a largely symbolic position – resigned temporarily following charges of rape and sexual misconduct.

It was also the same day that the head of Israel’s tax authority resigned because of possible corruption charges. In the meantime, several other investigations are still pending, not least two or three directed at the Prime Minister himself, Ehud Olmert, concerning corruption and favoritism. And an appeal to the Supreme Court has already been filed against the minister of police’s choice for a new police chief – again, because of old charges of corruption of which the nominee had been acquitted only through a particularly narrow benefit of the doubt.


Just to punchline all this, today's news:
Moshe Katzav's brother accused of sexual harassment
posted by dhartung at 1:35 PM on March 12, 2007 [1 favorite]


This is a serious set back for the Israeli - El Salvadoran peace talks.
posted by srboisvert at 1:42 PM on March 12, 2007


Thank you, mach5 :)
posted by zarq at 1:45 PM on March 12, 2007


You know who else was basically the white race?
posted by Smedleyman at 1:47 PM on March 12, 2007 [1 favorite]


I bet this is all some sort of Fawlty Towers-ish misunderstanding.
posted by Kronoss at 1:52 PM on March 12, 2007 [2 favorites]


He's got nothing on this guy. NSFW
posted by Mayor Curley at 1:57 PM on March 12, 2007


This guy. Sorry.
posted by Mayor Curley at 1:58 PM on March 12, 2007


"Behaviour that is unbecoming of a diplomat?" Diplomats don't get to have kinky sex?

His top ought to be reprimanded, though. Shameful behavior on his/her part.
posted by honeydew at 2:12 PM on March 12, 2007


being in that sort of high stress job is not easy, as the record shows:
In 2000, Israel's ambassador to France died of cardiac arrest in a Paris hotel under circumstances the foreign ministry refused to publicise. Media reports said he was with a woman who was not his wife at the time.

Last year, Israel replaced its ambassador to Australia, Naftali Tamir, after he said Israel and Australia are "like sisters" because both are in Asia and their peoples do not have "yellow skin and slanted eyes".

In 2005, Israel cancelled the appointment of a diplomat to Australia after it was discovered that he had published pictures of nude Brazilian women on the internet while on a mission in Brazil.
posted by Postroad at 2:14 PM on March 12, 2007


Ariel Sharon's facing charges surrounding the Sabra/Shatila massacre?! Great!

Oh, a dude had a bit of fun and lost his job. Right. Carry on.
posted by Wataki at 2:29 PM on March 12, 2007


No 'mmmmff' tag?
posted by carter at 2:39 PM on March 12, 2007


This is hysterical--and Israeli govt. has been chock-full of sex scandals lately--rape, cheating, and now this.
posted by amberglow at 3:10 PM on March 12, 2007



I bet this is all some sort of Fawlty Towers-ish misunderstanding.

I'm betting it was a set-up of some kind.
posted by tkchrist at 3:14 PM on March 12, 2007


dhartung: Al-Jazeera says Israel sucks? OH NOES THE WORLD TURNED UPSIDE DOWN
posted by nasreddin at 3:20 PM on March 12, 2007


Why am i picturing him in a leather hood and handcuffs singing "let my pee-pee go!"
posted by jonmc at 3:23 PM on March 12, 2007 [2 favorites]


I wonder...

Had he been the top instead of the bottom, would the reaction have been less harsh? I mean, what if someone had walked in on him (consensually) tying some woman up? Less embarassing? Of course, it might also have helped if his boss had been Hans Blix.
posted by Clay201 at 3:31 PM on March 12, 2007


It’s not so disturbing an image set to the “What’s Happening” t.v. show theme.
posted by Smedleyman at 3:31 PM on March 12, 2007 [1 favorite]


Ambassadork.
posted by kirkaracha at 3:33 PM on March 12, 2007


... At the very least the guy needs to find a better top dreidel....

Fixed that for ya.
posted by rob511 at 3:36 PM on March 12, 2007 [3 favorites]


If getting drunk and being found naked except for bondage gear and a ballgag in El Salvador is wrong, then I, for one, need to rethink my life somewhat.
posted by Sparx at 3:46 PM on March 12, 2007 [3 favorites]


Dear Nation State,

Israel has identified a potential issue associated with certain ambassadors. In cooperation with the UN and other regulatory agencies, Israel is voluntarily recalling certain Israel-branded ambassadors with bondage gear by Sony and offering free replacements for these ambassadors. Under rare conditions, it is possible for these ambassadors to overheat, which could pose a risk of nudity.

Potentially affected ambassadors were assigned with the following hemispheres:

* North
* South


In addition, these ambassadors MAY have also been provided in response to service calls. The ambassadors were shipped to countries between April 1, 2004 and July 18, 2006. The words ISRAEL and "Made in Israel" are printed on the back of the ambassadors just below the codpiece belt.

There is a two (2) step process to identify if your ambassador is affected:

1. Check if your ambassador model MAY be affected. If your ambassador is not listed, you are not affected.
2. Check if your specific ambassador PPID ( Part Piece Identification) is affected. This step is necessary to identify if your ambassador is affected. Only some ambassador within each continent are affected. If the ambassador is subject to this recall you will be automatically connected to a replacement order form.
posted by srboisvert at 4:00 PM on March 12, 2007 [2 favorites]


I find this horrifying. How can a senior official in the Israeli government have gotten this far without learning how to lock the goddamned door first?
posted by koeselitz at 4:16 PM on March 12, 2007 [3 favorites]


The strangest thing about this whole affair? His safety word was "unilateral withdrawl".
posted by ColdChef at 4:22 PM on March 12, 2007 [6 favorites]


I look forward to the day when they run a similar news story about Dick Cheney.
posted by Dave Faris at 4:52 PM on March 12, 2007 [2 favorites]


this thread is uselsss without pix
posted by Jimbob at 5:15 PM on March 12, 2007


Sounds like a great way to discredit an opponent. Abduct them, bind and gag them and leave them where they’ll be found by the public.
posted by Tenuki at 5:49 PM on March 12, 2007


Sounds like a great way to discredit an opponent. Abduct them, bind and gag them and leave them where they’ll be found by the public.

Thats what the kidnappers thought until they took the gag out and the diplomat asked if he could please have another.
posted by b1tr0t at 6:21 PM on March 12, 2007 [1 favorite]


The strangest thing about this whole affair? His safety word was "unilateral withdrawl".

Ha!

I guess the mystery of what happened is solved then. Safety words don't work with ball gags!
posted by zarq at 6:49 PM on March 12, 2007


I guess the mystery of what happened is solved then. Safety words don't work with ball gags!

When gagged, the replacement safeword is (naturally) to hum Biladi.
posted by CrunchyFrog at 7:11 PM on March 12, 2007


"Knowing Duckman Refael he's probably doing something stupid like stumbling round town in a bondage mask!" -Aunt Bernice
posted by clevershark at 7:23 PM on March 12, 2007


I always chuckled at the intro to WKRP In Cincinnati, when a hand is spinning a radio dial and you catch a few snippets of various radio bits, one of which is "...but the senator, while insisting he was not intoxicated, could not explain his nudity..."

Seemed outlandish and implausible then - nowadays it seems like being just drunk and naked would be quaint, like having an oddly patterned shirt or an out-of-fashion mustache.
posted by jalexei at 7:31 PM on March 12, 2007


I look forward to the day when they run a similar news story about Dick Cheney.
posted by y2karl at 7:34 PM on March 12, 2007


nowadays it seems like being just drunk and naked would be quaint, like having an oddly patterned shirt or an out-of-fashion mustache.

there are times in my life where I've gone four-for-four.
posted by jonmc at 7:37 PM on March 12, 2007


Diplomats don't get to have kinky sex?

Diplomats can have all kinds of kinky sex. They just can't compromise the image of their country in so doing. No taping three-ways with the locals; no kinky fun with prostitutes; no having to be released from bondage gear by local policy. That's just embarassing.
posted by Dasein at 8:13 PM on March 12, 2007


"Bitch set me up!"

Pesonally I don't see why this is such a big deal. It's not like real Ambassadors are expected to be anything but figureheads for their countries "intelligence" services.
posted by davy at 8:36 PM on March 12, 2007


I'm just sitting here smugly, thinking of the road not taken, and being delighted I didn't join the diplomatic corp.
posted by donovan at 9:14 PM on March 12, 2007


Diplomats don't get to have kinky sex?

Actually, it comes with the territory.

According to various girls I've known who've worked in Sydney's top dungeons, the clientele veers heavily towards the respected & powerful - judges, parliamentarians, diplomats etc, following the established precedent from many of Her Majesty's dignified servants back in Old Blighty.

Thsi is partly self-selecting, because these places cost a fortune to visit, but my pop-psychology stance towards it is also that the responsibility of being Mr Proper-all-the-time, combined with stress & power, somehow demand a release whereby the clients flip to the other side of the coin & become pathetic, abused & victimised, punished for their filthy pervy thoughts, and so on, in a form of cathartic release.

Personally, I think that they are mostly suffering from some sort of Catholic guilt complex on steroids, due to the intensity of their various positions & the dissonance created between their public personae & their private thoughts, which causes them to take ever more extreme measures to purge and / or indulge those thoughts in a ritualistic setting of abasement.

I am not sure how this applies to regular people who enjoy a bit of BDSM, but I tend to feel that those with public power & responsibility are a different psychological kettle of fish to teenaged gothlings who like wearing a bit of rubber out in public & maybe being tickled with a suede cat-o-nine-tails from time to time, if only for show.
posted by UbuRoivas at 9:59 PM on March 12, 2007


the responsibility of being Mr Proper-all-the-time, combined with stress & power, somehow demand a release whereby the clients flip to the other side of the coin & become pathetic, abused & victimised, punished for their filthy pervy thoughts, and so on, in a form of cathartic release.

You run into this theory quite often and I can't disprove it any more than its proponents can prove it. But, personally, I'm skeptical. I'm a switch myself and know lots of switches, tops, and bottoms. I can't find any consistent patterns regarding the social/economic/career status of BDSM people in general or of any subset of BDSM people in particular. I've known male bottoms who were total slackers and some who are over achievers and everything in between.

As for the idea that we have a particular breed of male subs, living apart from the rest of kinkdom, whose high status, high pressure positions lead to their proclivities... well, again, I couldn't disprove it. But I think it's far more reasonable to suppose that people in this catagory are just as likely to be top or bottom as folks in the general population. I suspect we only hear more about the bottoms because (a) their activities result in funnier news stories and (b) they have to, because of the well known dearth of female tops, visit professionals. Those who do it with a girlfriend or wife are more likely to get reliable discretion.

Which is not to say that pros are all eager to divulge their clients' secrets. My guess is that most blabbing is done with names and other specifics omitted, strictly as gossip and entertainment and not in an effort to out or blackmail anyone. So we get lots of non-specific rumors and whispers (which I assume are often based in fact) like the ones posted by UbuRoivas:

in Sydney's top dungeons, the clientele veers heavily towards the respected & powerful - judges, parliamentarians, diplomats etc,

As for the gothlings with a taste for fetish gear... Yeah, you run into those types now and then, but, really, most people who are interested in BDSM are just interested in BDSM because it gives them a woody, not because it provides cool fashion accessories. Most folks dress as conservatively as they have to to stay in the closet and wouldn't want to walk around in leather and chains on a daily basis even if they could.
posted by Clay201 at 12:10 AM on March 13, 2007


Mayor Curly: Is that video for real? It looked to me like someone responding to a post-hypnotic suggestion, keyed to himself saying the word 'pride'. As such, it is very interesting, apart from the humor.
posted by Goofyy at 12:15 AM on March 13, 2007


Have LGF worked it out yet that Muslim terrorists disguised as Salvadoreans set the Israeli ambassador up?

/snark/

. . .excuse me if I don't dignify Little Green Footballs with a link.
posted by bad grammar at 12:52 AM on March 13, 2007


Who cares? He's Jewish!

Call me wen the next powerful right-wing Christian gets caught screwing young boys.
posted by jeffburdges at 2:10 AM on March 13, 2007


Well, I dunno about his religion, but back in the day a friend of mine and I used to wonder about Ed Meese....
posted by pax digita at 4:08 AM on March 13, 2007


What Clay201 said, especially this part: "I've known male bottoms who were total slackers and some who are over achievers and everything in between."
posted by desjardins at 7:38 AM on March 13, 2007


So, kinky sex, ok, but....why’d he have to get drunk?
posted by Smedleyman at 11:10 AM on March 13, 2007


pax_digita, Ed Meese is a Lutheran.
posted by zarq at 1:23 PM on March 13, 2007


Clay201: very well said. I think you ironed out a lot of the creases in my comment.

I think we are pretty much in agreement overall - my point was really only trying to focus on a subset of powerful bottoms, but, as you say, the chances of hearing about them are exaggerated by various factors.

The quip about gothlings was just me being snarky & immature. Not meant as a reflection on regular BDSM folks.
posted by UbuRoivas at 3:11 PM on March 13, 2007


This thread is actually much, much better without pictures.
posted by LordSludge at 7:08 AM on March 14, 2007


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